Stamping on Butterflies
by kjate95
Summary: I had a feeling in the back of my mind as if something had changed that day. Had I looked around I would have noticed a shadow lurking in the trees and something change in said persons eyes with interest. I might have regretted revealing so much. But I didn't notice, and so I remained blissfully ignorant. Hyuuga/SI/OC
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own _Naruto_. It all belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Extended summary

I was the first Hyuuga in five generations to be born without a Byakugan. Arranged marriages and clan conspiracies were only the start. In stamping on a few too many unsuspecting butterflies I managed to change more than I bargained for... but, I mean, the Uchiha massacre wasn't that significant, right? SI/OC

!

Preface

_I lay beside the dead man, adrenaline pumping through my body mercilessly and causing my heart to race a mile a minute. This, frustratingly, caused more blood to pulse out of the cut across my neck and I held my hand firmly on the wound. I knew I was also injured on my foot and without medical attention I didn't stand a hope in hells chance in going anywhere. So I just lay in a slowly growing pool of my first kills blood and waited for the help to arrive._

_It wasn't long until my designated ANBU operative appeared but this time without his mask._

_"The snake broke your mask?" I asked the man with exhausted humour and a croaking voice._

_"In a manor of speaking," Itachi said wryly as he briefly assessed my blood soaked condition. I just forced a smile of reassurance._

_I don't know why but I thought my first kill would be cleaner and that I'd feel less… defeated. Exhaustion? Yeah. Horror? Maybe. Hey, even accomplishment. _

_But not defeat._

!

Chapter one 

_'Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive' - Elbert Hubbard_

!

I don't remember anything from my first few years. I mean, do you remember your time as a tiny baby? The brain of an infant isn't yet developed enough to retain substantial amounts of detailed information and therefore, even though I had the memories of a fully grown women hidden somewhere in my subconscious mind, I didn't become self-aware until I was around two and a half years of age. But when I did suddenly remember everything, it was a sensory overload which had me reeling in pain and clutching my tiny head in agony. I screamed and cried for hours and could hardly register anything other than all the useless facts from a life long ago. Yeah, I know, a full grown woman crying her eyes out from a little head ache. But it really did hurt!

_Is this what happens when you lose your memory? _I wondered idly. This pain never happened in the movies when the character who had lost their memories suddenly got them back again. Hollywood depicted it as if an interesting thought had suddenly occurred to them and they would blink a few times in pleasant surprise. Or horror, I suppose, depending on what they remembered. But I guess this wasn't a case of amnesia on my part; there was obviously something much larger going on.

There was always the chance that I had finally gone crazy, because quite frankly for me that could definitely have happened. The pain was near unbearable in my head but in my body it felt as if something was burning me from the inside out. But whatever the pain was it was causing me to become super-aware of everything around me.

_Human sonar,_ I giggled to myself in my pain induced delirium. But quickly that fiery feeling abated and I could no longer sense my surroundings.

After a while, when the images started to fade and my wailing sobs quieted down to soft whimpers, I realized I was not alone. Someone was holding me.

I looked up with effort and met the pupil-less eyes of a young boy, hardly much older than three or four. He was hugging me very tightly, his little arms wrapped around me and his hands twisting in my clothing. He had tears running down his face and was looking at me with fear and trepidation. _Why's he scared of me? _I wondered dreamily. _He's bigger than me._ It hardly occurred to me of why he might be bigger than me, my mind still recovering from the vicious onslaught of memories.

The pain in my head was slowing down to a dull throb. No new information was entering my mind and I sighed in relief. I closed my eyes and lent into the boys reassuring embrace, suddenly exhausted. I had no energy left to question anything; I was too tired.

"Nanami?" the boy almost shouted, his voice hitching in distress.

_Nanami? I wonder what that means. _But before I could ask the boy, I had slipped into unconsciousness.

!

The next morning I awoke and found the same little boy who had been cradling me from the night before, now hovering over my face with a severe look of concentration.

"Ahh!" I exclaimed in shock. Obviously this boy had no concept of personal space.

"Nana?" asked the boy hesitantly. It was then that I noticed his eyes of pale lavender and the fact that they were, quite disturbingly, lacking any pupils. I felt my jaw drop in childish wonder and as if of their own accord, my hands moved to touch the little boys face. He didn't flinch away, instead a smile erupted across his expression in relief and before I knew it I was pulled into a near bone crushing hug.

He started mumbling things as he picked me up and spun me around. I couldn't help it, I laughed. It was fun! I wasn't worried that this stranger was swinging me up in the air and near crying into my hair. He felt familiar. I felt like I could trust him. He was obviously a harmless child anyway – I didn't think I had much to worry about.

We continued like this for a few more moments before footsteps could be heard coming closer. The boy collected himself immediately in an almost panicked state. Quickly, he put me down on the floor and held my hand firmly. I was unstable on my feet and almost fell over but the boy held on tightly and I remained standing. While I had the chance I looked around the room curiously. The style was Japanese with hardly any furniture save a desk, a chest of draws and a futon which we had just been jumping all over. Not only this but in the typical oriental style the walls looked like I could jump right through them, giving the illusion of privacy and security, but really anyone passing would be able to hear the most intimate of conversation. _Where am I? _I wondered_._ But before I could investigate any more into my surroundings or ask the young boy, the paper wall opened and in stepped a giant.

Okay, it wasn't a giant. But I was obviously a small child again and so everyone taller than four foot looked like a giant. The man looked very similar to the young boy with the same eyes and sleek black hair. His nose, however, seemed to be turned up in distain and his lips turned down in a permanent position of unhappiness. I figured that they must be close relatives at the least, if not father and son.

As soon as his eyes turned on us the young boy bowed in respect. I watched him do it and attempted to bow as well, not wanting to seem impolite. There was obviously something going on here that I had yet to grasp and I figured that the smart option was to go along with it until I had figured it all out. Unfortunately it seemed I had yet to grasp the concept of up and down and I felt myself begin to topple forward. Thankfully, the boy was still holding my hand and managed to catch me before I hit the floor. I felt my cheeks blushing red as he steadied me again. When I looked up I saw a look of astonishment on the young boys face and an expression of deep interest on the elders. The elder man studied me critically for a few moments before turning to the boy and addressing him, as if forgetting I was even there.

"Blah, Blah, Blah," The man said sharply. Well, maybe that's not exactly what he said, but it might as well have been for all that I could understand of it. The young boy replied in a formal, polite manor, his tone hinting no opinion or emotion, his whole countenance completely different from when he had been throwing me around. The two conversed for a few minutes and then the elder left as quickly as he had come. The boy at my side didn't move until we could no longer hear footsteps in the corridor and then turned to me with a grin. I felt privileged that he would show me his smile. He didn't seem the type that would give them out freely.

!

The following weeks were some of the most confusing of my life; both past and present. At first I had to get my head round the fact that I had been reincarnated; which I can tell you is not an easy transition. Once I had figured this out it didn't take me long to realize that I was in the Naruto-verse. At first I had a typical fan girl moment because, let's be honest, who wouldn't? I wasn't obsessed with the anime and I never really read the manga, but that didn't mean that it wasn't absolutely epic to be in another world. However, the first hurdle I had to cross was the language barrier. They all spoke Japanese. Annoying but unavoidable I suppose. Learning new languages was never my forte but I couldn't really attempt to communicate in English either. So I had to learn, but as it turns out grasping language as a child is relatively easy compared to when you are a fully grown adult and set in your ways. So soon enough I could at least understand the basics of what people were saying to me even if I couldn't yet talk back.

Unfortunately, this wasn't anywhere near my biggest problem. You see, it would seem as if I had been born as a branch member of the Hyuuga clan. Oh and what a bundle of laughs they seemed to be.

But it wasn't all bad because, as it turned out that, the boy that had been looking after me was my big brother; none other than Hyuuga Neji himself. Of course, I fangirled. When I realized who he was I refused to let go of his hand, and bless his little heart, he didn't seem to mind at all. I think I must have been a really unresponsive baby because every time I did something even remotely intelligent he would look at me excitedly and get me to do it again. I wondered if this was how all babies felt.

He was around three, about a year older than me and if I remembered his personal history correctly at this point in time he still had his father – or rather our father. It turned out to be the rather miserable looking man that had found me and Neji the day that I had woken up after regaining my memories. Let's put it this way; he wasn't a doting father. The man was all about formality and boundaries. He never once went to hug either of his children. Instead, he had Neji report both of our progress once a week in a meeting in his study. After a detailed report which Hizashi would listen to intently, for he never did anything half way, he would send us away with another branch family member who acted as our surrogate mother; her name was Suki. Of course, Neji would often whisper to me that she wasn't our mother and that our real mother had died shortly after giving birth to me. I knew it couldn't have been in child birth because I wasn't even supposed to exist in this time and in the original timeline she wasn't around either. So I saw no reason to be guilty.

Whenever we would present ourselves to Hizashi, Neji would try so very hard to please him. He would listen with devotion and be ecstatic afterwards when our father would say that he was happy with our progression. I wasn't quite the same, no longer really a young child which needed their parent's approval every few minutes. But I did appreciate that he really did care about us in his own way.

I found out what my name was as well; Nanami. I liked it and thought it was sweet but I also wanted to shorten this down to Nana. Nana sounded more like me. However I didn't think telling anyone this would change things as the Hyuuga were very formal and they wouldn't agree to calling me anything other than my full name. So I settled with the thought that although it would be doomed to be known as Nanami inside the compound walls, outside these walls I would make my name as Nana only. I couldn't wait to go to school for this simple reason alone. However, I found that when Neji was in a particular mood he would allow himself to refer to me as Nana. But these occasions were far and few between.

I spent most of my time with Neji. He would play with me endlessly, keeping me entertained as well as himself. He seemed to really love me and I saw on many occasions he had a rather sweet protectiveness of me. As a big brother should. But I still found it difficult to see him as as my _big_ brother considering how young he was. He spent hours sitting with me and teaching me how to speak and write. My chubby baby fingers would struggle but I would have fun anyway, throwing ink at the page and laughing merrily as Neji cleaned up as it went everywhere. He didn't seem to mind though.

_Where is that quiet, moody, insufferable Neji that we know from his genin days? _I questioned. _Could his father's death really have affected him so much? This child has no quarrels with an unwanted fate or preconditioned opinions of what his destiny was doomed to be! _This thought made me sad, so I stopped it immediately. There really was very little I could do.

I went for a while without talking at all. I didn't see the point when nobody asked me anything directly and I didn't have that natural childhood curiosity about the world around me to ask everyone 'why?' constantly. So, after getting a pretty good grasp on Japanese, mostly from Neji's teachings, I turned to him and said my first word. Or, well, words.

"What's a Shinobi?" I asked innocently. Obviously, he had already explained what it was before and I already knew the answer, but it was as good a start as any to finding out more about the ninja world I had so unexpectedly found myself in. Of course, Neji was overjoyed at my progress and explained in detail exactly what they were, what they did and how great a shinobi our father was. In listening to Neji's ramblings (something I could never picture older Neji doing) I actually learnt some things.

One thing was that our father was in fact in charge of the Branch family. There were load of different jobs within the Hyuuga clan and looking after the Branch family, which made up the majority of the Hyuuga was one of the most important jobs. Hiashi was in charge of everything overall, but it would seem that he had minions. I wasn't looking forward to being one of those minions. No one within the clan ever seemed to look happy; especially the minions.

Another thing I learnt was that children in Konoha seemed to go to the academy at 5 years old. That meant that Neji didn't have long until he was off to learn how to kill people and play with sharp objects. This was when I also realized how very wrong the existence of a hidden village was. To train up children from a young age to become soldiers and brainwash them into following the orders of their Kages no matter what. I entertained the idea of refusing to become a Shinobi, but I knew that coming from a Shinobi clan and one as prestigious as the Hyuuga, would mean that I really didn't have much choice in the matter.

Later that day Neji presented me to our father, informing him that I had said my first words. He nodded in approval and dismissed us. The little bit of praise had me buzzing. Maybe I wasn't so grown out of having my father's approval after all.

I first witnessed the power of the Byakugan when our father took us to witness a spar between two branch family members. We sat on the edge of the training field and watched them fight. They were smooth and skilled. I know my mouth was hanging opening in awe but… wow! It was as if they were dancing with each other; a practiced dance which would take hours to perfect, and they made it look effortless. Graceful was an understatement. I looked on with unrestrained envy. I turned to my father and asked in a quiet voice, "Can I do that someday?"

He looked down at me with a calculated expression. "No," he said flatly and to the point. _I mean come on dad, don't beat around the bush or anything. Tell it to me straight! _I deflated instantly in disappointment.

_Why not? _I wanted to say. _Neji's going to be a genius. Can't I be too? _

As if hearing my words my father continued, "You do not possess the Byakugan." He looked at me with that same expression of mild interest he had displayed the first time I remembered meeting him.

I had never thought about whether I possessed the Byakugan or not; I had just assumed I did. It was a bit of a let-down and I felt a nasty feeling in my stomach at the idea of disappointing my father with my existence. _This must have been how Hinata felt all those years._ It turned out that I was the first member of the Hyuuga clan in five generations to be born without the Byakugan.

After the spar Neji and I rose to leave, bowed to our father, and waited to be dismissed. Hizashi remained seated and turned to Neji first. "Neji you will now begin to learn how to use your Byakugan. Arrive here every morning at six and I will begin your lessons." My brother looked absolutely thrilled at the idea, thanking our father several times. Hizashi looked uncomfortable at the display of emotion and quickly turned to address me.

He paused before he spoke, weighing up his words. "Being born without the Byakugan means you will have different responsibilities than your brother. But you are no less important." He paused again and looked off across the training field expressionlessly. "It cannot be considered a bad thing that you do not have our kekkei genkai."

He dismissed us after that and we left him sitting at the edge of the field by himself. When I glanced back at our father I witnessed that he had his hand pressed up to his forehead. I couldn't see his face but I entertained the idea that he had his eyes closed in silent regret.

!

Just less than a year after turning up in this universe I turned three years old. Nothing special happened really. I received a few trinkets from some of the household staff, and a china doll from Suki.

But it was special in some ways. That day my father came and ate breakfast with me and Neji, something he would do on occasion and said happy birthday to me. He gave me a china tea set, saying that because I was almost a lady that I must learn our clans ancient tea ceremonies. Now, I don't know about you, but in my first life I absolutely loved tea. I mean, it was to the point of a near unhealthy obsession which probably contributed to my eventual demise. Not only that, but a significant amount of little girls like to dress up as fairies and pour tea to their teddy bears. I was technically only three, even with the mental age of someone well into my 20s, but my next actions can only be attributed to the fact that my Daddy had just bought me a pink teapot. Without much thought to any decorum, which Suki had been desperately trying and failing to teach me, I leapt at my father and hugged him tightly around the neck.

He's a Shinobi, if he didn't want the hug than he should have dodged. I held on for barely three seconds, not wanting to push my luck and moved quickly to sit back at the table as if nothing had happened. I gave Hizashi sometime to compose himself and hummed happily to myself with an impish grin on my face. No one said much for the rest of the meal but when I looked up at Neji, I could tell he was highly amused.

"I am unaware of how you manage it," my brother had said with a small smile later that evening, "but I would bet you could get away with near enough anything. However, I do not gamble."

Neji had been having a hard time with Hizashi's training. He was a genius, of course, and so the physical side was hardly any issue. But Hizashi was instructing him more and more to suppress his feelings just like a proper Hyuuga should. Neji could do it, of course he could, but that meant a change from a playful Neji who didn't mind me spilling ink everywhere, to sterner Neji which would give me a dry, unforgiving look if I accidently spilt tea down his front. Which I did, several times trying to learn those stupid ceremonies. Then again, sometimes I did it on purpose to try and get a rise out of him, but he never took the bait.

Despite the inevitable change in personality which I had known was going to come for a while, Neji's present was the one I treasured most. He got me a white ribbon to tie around my hair to keep my black bangs out of my eyes. The thought was nice but I decided instead to use it as a hair tie and put my hair in a high ponytail, with shorter bits of hair framing my face. It worked for me quite nicely and no matter how much Suki had wanted to change it, I refused to let her touch my hair – lest I lose the precious ribbon.

In return, when Neji's birthday came around, I bought him a black ribbon so that he could tie his hair like he had done before in the series. He was a bit unsure about doing anything with his hair at first, but once I jumped onto his back and refused to let go no matter what he did, he relented and allowed me to play with it. I had missed his typical hair style and even though I knew he would do it himself eventually, I was happy to have influenced his look in a positive way. The long pony tail really did look good.

As more months past I began to realize that the date of Hinata's kidnapping was coming closer and closer. And with this thought I saw how insignificant I really was. How was a child, a _baby, _meant to stop a bunch of ninja from kidnapping the Hyuuga heir? It was not as if I could tell anyone about the situation without raising suspicion about myself. I could very well be dragged to the Torture and Interrogation unit to be investigated and given a lobotomy and… okay, maybe not, but it probably wouldn't be a good idea to go round telling people I can remember a past life and that to me they should all be fictional characters. Everything had seemed to work out in the end didn't it? There wasn't really much I could do anyway. Fate or something had already planned out this story and I was just here for the ride.

_But what about Neji and Hizashi? Don't they die?_

When this particular nasty thought crossed my mind, I almost started crying. I couldn't just sit back and do nothing when the people I cared about were in danger. Neji had already stopped just being some character in a story and was now my big brother. He was the one who tried to teach me how to read Kanji and told me the history of the Hyuuga and picked me up when I fell over. Sure, it had only been only been a year, one in which I could hardly even speak, but God dammit he was family. Hizashi as well. He was not a very good father but I believed his heart was in the right place. I wanted to save them.

_I will save them. I will learn how to be a great Shinobi and I will save them._

But really, I could never have saved Hizashi from what he would become.

!

Before the kidnapping happened something else big took place. Hinata's birthday followed hardly six months after mine and Neji and I were dressed appropriately for the occasion. Suki, our fake-mother, had told us that we were to meet our cousin for the first time and that Neji was to receive his special task as a branch member. I, of course, knew what this task was and something dawned on me in horror.

_The caged-bird seal._ I had completely forgotten about this particular part of being a branch member. Nobody talked about it, it was a taboo subject, but I should have realized sooner that with Hinata's third birthday came the day that Neji was branded for life.

I felt like crying. Again.

As we walked with our father to meet the main family I was subdued and quiet. Not that I wasn't usually like this around my father, it was just that this time it wasn't an act but a sad realization. I knew how much resentment came from the seal, but I also knew the necessity of it should another village get their hands on a Hyuuga's body and attempt to steal the Byakugan - which they somehow achieved anyway if I remembered the Kiri-nin, Ao, correctly.

My father's voice came to mind suddenly, _"It cannot be considered a bad thing that you do not have our kekkei genkai."_

I glanced at Hizashi and looking closely, seeing great regret in his eyes, just like I had imagined before on the training field. Unexpectedly I reached out and grabbed Neji's hand. He was shocked and a bit angry at the public display of affection without his consent but one look in my eyes told him not to question it. So he didn't.

We arrived at the centre of the Hyuuga compound and were introduced to Hinata, the clan heir, for the first time. She was very sweet and obviously very shy, as all she seemed to want to do was to hide behind her father. I had to refrain from 'awwing' out loud. But when I saw Hiashi I was almost bowled over by how similar he looked to Hizashi. Not just similar but identical in every way possible. They seemed to hold themselves in the same way and when they spoke even their voices were very alike. However, if you listened closely, there was more of a gentle edge to Hiashi if compared with his twin brother.

"We would like to wish little Hinata a very happy birthday," my father said formally with a respectful bow which both Neji and I followed dutifully. "We would like to present her with a gift. Nanami?" My father turned to me, his eyes gentle. Letting go of Neji's hand I stepped forward with the package I had helped choose earlier that week. I had insisted, respectfully, in accompanying my father to buy the tea pot which we were to give to Hinata. I had found out, as of late, that my father had a soft spot for me and if I knew how to play my cards, I could get away with a lot. That is, as long as I used the proper etiquette and was motivated enough to do it convincingly.

I handed the package to the blushing little girl with a smile. "I helped pick it out," I said happily, not at all fazed with having everybody's eyes on me as Hinata obviously was. What can I say? I was a bit of a showman. So sue me.

"Thank you," Hinata whispered and gave me an unsure smile back. I naturally beamed in return; well aware that I probably shouldn't be showing so much emotion in the presence of so many emotionally constipated shinobi. But I couldn't help it, she was so cute.

"Hizashi," Hiashi said to his brother, the light hearted atmosphere suddenly turning heavy. "I think it is time that I take Neji under my wing."

The younger brother visibly stiffened. He bowed, none the less, in agreement and then turned to his son.

"Neji," Hizashi voice carried without any indication of emotion.

"Father," Neji bowed to his father and then followed Hiashi and the elders into the main compound. Hinata was led away by her mother; a beautiful women with a soft face and obviously very heavily pregnant. You could tell by the way she spoke that she was a gentle soul, much like Hinata would one day become.

_She will die as well,_ I thought solemnly.

With the entirety of the main house now gone from the court yard, the branch family members dispersed as well. The formalities were over and done with and so they could all now go and enjoy the festival being held in celebration of the peace treaty between Kuma and Konoha. The festival, finishing in a weeks' time, would end badly. The feeling of helplessness began to creep into my stomach once again and I needed reassurance, but Neji was not there.

Slowly I reached over to my father and tugged on his kimono gently. He looked down at me absentmindedly, but I could see the deep worry in his eyes.

"Will it hurt him?" I asked quietly. I looked back to where Neji had just left with deep regret. _I feel as if I have just let him ruin his whole life!_

Hizashi looked away from me, his eye also resting on the main house. "Yes," he said unflinchingly. I had to bite back a sarcastic comment about how reassuring he was. "Come." My father walked away turning his back on his first born. I didn't follow right away, my mind still on Neji and the injustice of the situation.

"Nanami, do not make me ask again," his voice was soft but firm. I nodded absentmindedly and left with my father, taking his hand quickly as I looked for that reassurance that only a parent could grant.

He looked down at me in surprise as he wasn't used to such contact but didn't push me away. Like father, like son.

!

**I thought I should give credit to some of the stories which had inspired me to write my own self-insert, such as **_Iryo-nin Kasa (__医療忍__傘__) by Vaengir, Dreaming of Sunshine by Silver Queen and Catch Your Breath by Lang Noi. _**Please read them if you haven't already! **

_**AND JUST BECAUSE I LIKE PHYSICS AND THE CHAOS THEORY IS REALLY INTERESTING I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT LIKE TO KNOW:**_

_**Chaos theory studies the behaviour of dynamical systems that are highly sensitive to initial conditions—an effect which is popularly referred to as the butterfly effect. Small differences in initial conditions (such as those due to rounding errors in numerical computation) yield widely diverging outcomes for such dynamical systems, rendering long-term prediction impossible in general. – Wikipedia Chaos theory**_

_**Chaos: When the present determines the future, but the approximate present does not approximately determine the future**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Stamping on Butterflies **

Chapter Two

_!_

_"Pause you who read this, and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day." ― Charles Dickens, Great Expectations_

_The saddest thing about Betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies. It comes from Friends and loved ones. - Unknown_

_!_

The following week wasn't as bad as it could have been, but that wasn't to say it was a bundle of fun either.

As I was the same age and would be in the same academy year as Hinata, the clan thought that it was best for us both to start to learn to fight at the same time. I would be her sparring partner. Neji, however, would continue on with his lessons with our father separately but observe Hinata and I train; watching over us silently. He now had the honour of being Hinata's protector, but with this honour was the price of the clans curse seal.

Neji hadn't returned until nightfall after we had left him in the care of the main house. I had stayed up late to wait for him to come back, but had failed to keep myself awake for long enough. I was curled up in a ball on his bed asleep, yet awoke when he lay down in the bed next to me silently and turned on his side to go to sleep.

He didn't say a word, but the fact he didn't ask me to go back to my own room spoke volumes.

He and I had never shared a room but I wouldn't deny the fact that I had, on a few occasions, snuck into his room in the middle of the night and made him scoot over to make room for me. I guess if I had a mother in this world I would have sought comfort from her, but as it was I didn't and Neji was as good as I would get for reassurance. In the past year of being in this world I had begun to dream more and more about the past; my past. Not only this but I had also dreamt, over and over again, what was supposed to play out in the Naruto-verse storyline.

One particular reoccurring dream was Neji's death. This was usually when I found myself crawling in bed next to Neji at three in the morning with tears streaming down my face and looking for comfort. I mean, I had bawled my eyes out in my previous life the first time I saw it happen and that was when he was still a fictional character. But now he was no longer some character on some show; he was my brother. And God dammit if I was to ever let something like that happen to him again I wouldn't be a very good sister.

After that night Neji wore a bandage over his forehead.

He let me see the seal once and only once, and that was the next day when I had woken to find him simply staring into the mirror on his dresser. He touched it absentmindedly and I had to remind myself that this was just a four-year-old child. He had to grow up so fast. For all Neji's loyalty and youth he was still a genius and therefore, when I saw the dark look in his eye, I wasn't that surprised. He understood the significance of the curse seal and what it would mean for his future. He wasn't happy about it but he would live with it. Yet if he was this unhappy about it now it was no wonder that in canon, by the time he was twelve, he was festering such deep hatred for his clan.

When he caught my eye, the rest of me still buried in the sheets of his bed and hidden under his pillow, his expression softened. He looked back to the mirror, placed the bandage on his forehead, and went to brutally dragging me from the warm cosy bed. I went kicking and screaming, of course, simply for the fun of the drama. But it made him smile, just a little bit, and that was worth the horse throat and the action of being physically dumped onto a cold, wooden floor. Just.

That day was the first time I realize how dam hard being a ninja was going to be. I was to train with Hiashi alongside Hinata and he started us with gentle exercises – I'm still convinced it was to lull us into a false sense of security. From then on it was jam-packed with Katas that caused your body to bend in unexpected ways and make you push yourself to the limit. It would seem, however, that I was much better at it than Hinata was. She frequently tripped and stumbled and was so unsure of herself I was convinced she would jump at her own shadow given the chance.

_Not going to marry a Nara then_, I thought sardonically.

But then again she was, just like myself, three. Quite frankly this was an awfully large amount of pressure to put on a three year old. I mean we both had a couple years until we were to join the academy anyway, and half the students would be civilians and would have no clue what a left foot kick even looked like. Okay nor did I at this point either but it was still a fair assessment. Intelligence told me that Clan kids would be quick to pass through the academy and yet if I remembered the series correctly it would seem that none of the Rookie nine or Gai's team passed before they were twelve. Whereas someone like Kakashi was only five years old when he passed the graduation exam – which even for a shinobi village is a little excessive. I decided to voice my question to my uncle when we had settled down for lunch. Sitting next to Neji and accepting one of the pre-prepared bento boxes from him, I turned to the clan head.

"Hiashi-sama?" I questioned in my childish voice. He looked over to me with a gentle expression. It turned out that Hiashi was actually a very mild mannered man, with pressures on his head that he was reluctant to have. He was, in essence, what Hinata would be if she ever became clan head. This was more than mildly surprising.

My impression of Hiashi in the Naruto series was a harsh, abrasive person who didn't expect anything other than the best from everyone - much like my father seemed to be. However he was nothing of the sort. When I had gone to my first lesson with my Uncle I had witnessed in unrepentant astonishment how gentle he was with his daughter when she made a mistake, and reassuring he was when she looked frustrated. When he smiled down at his daughter lovingly my mouth actually hung open in amazement. Neji quickly closed it for me before anyone could see, and I schooled my features to polite interest.

_What changed to make Hiashi so cold? Was it Hinata's weakness… or something else?_

My brother's look clearly said that I was to not say a word about Hiashi's behaviour. My expression was equally as dry and Neji simply quirked an eyebrow in amusement. I almost stuck my tongue out at him but decided against it. He had recently started to pinch me every time I did something socially unacceptable.

"Yes Nanami?" Hiashi replied kindly.

"Why do some people pass the academy exam earlier than others?" Neji and Hinata looked at Hiashi in interest as well. It was a good question.

"Well…" he began, thinking as he took a bite of his lunch. It would seem that Hiashi enjoyed teaching very much. His back would stiffen and his tone would change into a professionally interested manner, just like a scholar might do. I thought, not for the first time, that Hizashi and Hiashi were born the wrong way round. Hiashi should have been the younger brother and I would bet my life that he would have become an academy teacher or jonin-sensei in a heartbeat. "In times of war a ninja village requires more shinobi than usual to both perform missions and fight on the front lines. As you can imagine there are a considerable amount more casualties during a war and so, in these events, the academy graduation limits are significantly reduced. Otherwise, the graduation age in Konoha is twelve."

"But what if they were a genius like Neji?" I questioned in childish exuberance. Neji reached out and pinched me on the arm painfully. I swatted and glared at him as I rubbed my now-sore skin, and saw a small bit of colour rise subtly onto his otherwise expressionless face. _Aww he's embarrassed!_ I cooed in my head. _But wait, when did Neji grow any modesty?_

Hiashi just smiled at our antics and answered smoothly. "There are rare exceptions of course, when the child in question is a pure genius. Take Uchiha Itachi for example, he graduated last year at only seven."

The conversation continued on after that but I was hardly paying attention. As soon as I heard _that _name my mind went blank. Uchiha Itachi. Now there was a problem that I wouldn't be able to solve. How could I have forgotten such an integral part of the Naruto plot?! If that one event, if only the massacre wouldn't occur, so much could be different it would be beyond thinking about. The future would no longer be predicable, but that would just make me like everyone else anyway. And with the Uchiha clan still alive they could have a huge impact on the success of the hidden leaf village. The sharingan wasn't considered the most powerful dojutsu for nothing.

That evening I started a journal. I needed to organise my thoughts effectively and remember all the details from what I could remember of the show. It was a long time ago I had watched them and grew bored waiting for the next episode to come out, so I never saw the ending. But that hardly mattered, for if I could change things from the beginning then everything would turn out alright… probably.

All night I stayed up recording my memories into the leather bound book I had been given by Neji months ago. He said he had no need for such an object and that I could do with it whatever I wished. It was tiring work and I only managed a third of the story before drifting off to sleep.

Over the next week I managed to complete it and found a neat hiding place under a floorboard under my dresser. The hiding place was almost unnecessary though as I had written the whole book in English. Risky, I know, but I was going for the fact that, without a Rosetta stone to translate my childish scrawl, no one was going to know what it actually said. My journal was safe – for the time being.

The training was certainly effective and Hiashi introduced me to my own fighting style. You see although Hyuuga members without the Byakugan were rare they weren't unheard of and so previous generations with my 'disadvantage' had made a special alteration of the gentle fist to incorporate a boe staff instead of, well, fists. The staff I began to use was a simple bamboo stick, slightly taller than myself, but still hurt when you got hit over the head with it. Hiashi, for all his gentleness, told me not to hesitate when I went in for the hit. Nevertheless, having been brought up in my first life within a society which frowned upon violence it was slightly difficult to recondition myself to being okay with causing someone else pain. Especially a three year old and one as sweet as Hinata.

But in return for my insubordination I was on the receiving end of Hinata's fist and had to make do with a swollen nose for the rest of the week. She may have been three but damn could that girl hit. So I learnt pretty quickly that this world was all about the philosophy of 'Kill or be killed.' I didn't want to die and I wasn't the type to sit on the moral high ground for the sake of it. Self-righteous people annoyed me. So when I got over that little hiccup I found that I was actually a natural with the staff. Not surprising, I suppose, considering that the one-day-Hyuuga-genius was my brother.

Unfortunately the blisters were horrible. The more I used the staff the more raw my hands became. Hiashi reassured me that as time grew on I would grow calluses on my palms and the skin would become tough and strong. But, for this to happen, I had to go through night after night of bloody bandages that my brother very gently bound for me. He told me I was being brave and promised to buy me a pair of black leather, fingerless gloves for my next birthday. The thought made me smile and after that I didn't so much mind the blisters.

Not only was I taught to use the boe staff but also in the true Hyuuga tradition I began my education on the body's pressure points and weaknesses. Hinata had slightly different lessons to me, as she required the Byakugan to find the body's tenketsu points, whereas I was taught how to disable muscles with a particularly skilful jab in the right place. It was harder than the boe staff and involved a lot of studying of the human anatomy, which I rather struggled with, but at the same time it expanded my Japanese vocabulary and made me a more coherent child. Although Neji didn't show it I knew he was proud of my progress.

As my fighting skills grew so did my relationship with Hinata. I will not deny that I have a slightly overbearing personality and therefore would accidently drown her out in my ramblings and laughter; yet she didn't seem to mind and even seemed to find my antics entertaining. Once I figured that Hiashi didn't mind shows of emotion it was a challenge I set myself every day to make her laugh. This would frequently receive a pinch from Neji for good measure as my attempts got more and more imaginative, but he couldn't deny the small smile that would grace his lips as he tried to hone in his own amusement. I liked making people laugh - it was a good feeling.

Plus, this place needed all the good cheer it could get.

I found out from my father midweek, when he sat and ate with us for the first time in quite a while, that the only reason Hiashi had been so attentive with Hinata and me over the last few days and the days to come, was due to the peace treaty situation. Hiashi thought it best to keep the youngest, and therefore most vulnerable, of the clan together and under his watch while Kumo-nin were around.

_Wise move, _I thought cynically.

Four days into my training I witnessed my father and uncle spar for the first time. They were even more fluid than the two we had witnessed before, and made the other fight seem like child's plays.

As I watched I noticed it was hard not to see the battle of wills raging between the two brothers. I had known that my father held great resentment to the main house, but I was also aware that Hiashi was a strong leader, despite his dislike for the responsibilities, and demanded respect on the deepest of levels. The battle was long; the brothers almost matching one another in skill. But near the end it was clear who the victor would be and my father left the fight with great wounded pride and a sore heart. Hiashi was kind but he wouldn't throw a fight simply to spare the other opponent. He was the better fighter and there was no use hiding it.

Hizashi came and sat between Neji and me on the mat within the dojo. Hiashi instructed me to study the new katas in the scrolls he had given me the previous day, while he demonstrated to Hinata hers. While I sat and read I felt a slither of killing intent ripple through the man next to me. I looked up at my father and saw his eyes flicker from the band on Neji's forehead to Hinata, and watched as his byakugan activated without his notice. The look was a dangerous mix of jealousy and bitterness. I felt nothing but pity for Hizashi in this moment. He had been second his whole entire life, cursed with the caged-bird seal which meant he could be controlled and put down. I felt my own resentment bubble in the pit of my stomach at the injustice of the situation for my father and brother. They were nothing more than slaves to their clan; not misplaced loyalty but forced subjugation. I hated the clan for their dojutsu and felt guilty for the fact I had escaped this fate undeservingly.

Before I could blink my father was on the floor, withering in pain, his hands clutching his head and his mouth open in a silent scream. Hizashi's byakugan was slowly receding and soon there were no more visible veins around his eyes. As quickly as it had started it was over and Hizashi lay panting in a heap at the feet of his elder brother. I could only stare with horror at the broken man. Neji was near to tears, his hand reaching out in front of him with a cry for his father on the tip of his lips.

"I hope you can learn Neji, unlike your father, where your loyalties lie." The tone was not cruel or mocking but gentle and full of deep regret. I understood where he was coming from, I really did. He was the head of the clan and would not tolerate disloyalty. He must treat all of his subordinates the same way, and as is the job of the branch family to protect the main, he must make sure this tradition is up held. A chain is only as strong as its weakest link.

And yet I hated him for it. I hated this stupid clan and its stupid rules and its stupid, stupidness. Mature, I know.

I felt like running away in this moment. They wouldn't kick up too much of a fuss after all, considering I didn't have the Byakugan. I could leave this pretend life behind and find the real world. I almost turned in on myself in self-pity in that moment, until I heard my uncle speak once more.

"I will not tolerate this again Hizashi." With these words he left the Dojo, beckoning for Hinata to follow, which she did, although hesitantly, as she glanced back at us with a silent apology.

In that one glance from Hinata all my anger evaporated. I was never very good at holding onto anger, and here I understood the situation far too well to be able to blame one single individual. I looked over to my brother who sat on his knees and had his head boeed to hide his emotions from the world. I knew that he was feeling exactly the same as me. But he couldn't let that show for, like his father, it could be his undoing.

Father's eyes had followed his brothers retreating form until it was out of sight. He was no longer on the floor but once again sat in a straight-backed lotus position. His eyes shifted to Neji and caught his down turned head. When he caught sight of his son his expression went cold and I didn't like that look in his eyes; it was disappointment and detachment.

_Why would Hizashi be disappointed in Neji?_ To anyone who didn't know the boy as well as I did, they might mistake his down turned head for shame. _Hizashi must believe Neji is ashamed of him._

I wanted to desperately rectify the situation, yet it would seem the damage had already been done. Hizashi stood quickly and headed for the exit, not once glancing back at his children. Neji looked up in surprise but didn't utter a word, the endless lessons on manors Suki had drilled into his head preventing him from speaking to his father at a time like this.

I, however, had no such qualms. I jumped up, chasing after Hizashi with my little legs and grabbed onto his Kimono with my chubby fingers. He stopped, just like the other day, and looked down at me. This time there was no gentleness; only cold disdain.

I wanted to say something, anything, but the words got caught in my throat. He didn't give me time to recover and stepped away from me as if I was not even there. I let my fingers run through the silk of his clothes as he left.

Something had changed here today. I didn't know what it was, but I felt a cold foreboding crawl up my spin.

!

The end of the festivities was drawing near and I became more and more aware what that ending would mean. The night that the kidnapping would happened I came and found Neji and slept next to him, hugging his arm tightly.

"Neji? Are you awake?" I asked stupidly.

"No," he replied in a muffled voice. He wasn't trying to be funny, Neji didn't have a sense of humour, but I laughed anyway at his attempt to get me to be quiet. I felt slightly hysterical at this point.

"I have a bad feeling about tonight," I whispered into the pitch black.

The day had been the same as any other. I had spent most of it training with Hiashi and Hinata. Hiashi had informed us that after today he would not be the one to train with us and would only teach us here once a week where he would witness us fight and monitor our progress. Neji and I had been expecting such an announcement, as we had known for a while that the training had been simply to keep an eye on us while the Shinobi from cloud were around. An understandable precaution that would not be needed once the Kuma-nin had left the village.

We accepted this easily enough and went back to training. However my heart was not fully into it and I paid the price with a sore tailbone when I landed one too many times on my behind. I had a feeling that Hiashi wasn't paying attention much to our instructions either and would have called it a day had he not needed to keep an eye on us. There was clearly something troubling him and I would have bet anything it was the incident with Hizashi.

After supper that evening Neji and I were instructed not to leave our rooms. I figured that, as it was clouds last night in Konoha, the clan probably suspected that if they were to try something then it would be tonight. I knew that only one person was in danger and that was Hinata. But I was three years old and could hardly hold my boe-staff without dropping it, let alone fight off the head ninja of cloud. And if I were to mention to someone that Hinata was in danger they wouldn't even take me seriously, and would probably tell me not to worry because everything was taken care of.

Being a child again really sucked.

Thus I found myself in Neji's bed wide-awake and terrified about the outcome of the night. I felt my brother shift next to me and turn to his face in my direction.

"You have nothing to worry about you don't even have the byakugan," he tried to reassure me but that was hardly the issue at hand here.

"But what about Hinata?!" I cried out in frustration. I could vent to Neji, he wouldn't mind. Probably.

Neji signed and looked at me in his dead serious expression. "Hinata is perfectly safe in her room surrounded by Branch family members whose jobs it is to protect her. She will be-"

Before he could finish his train of thought a loud commotion was heard in the courtyard leading to the main house. Neji's room was on the ground floor and his window was just around the corner from said courtyard. I jumped at the noise and scrambled out of bed, latching onto the window frame and pulling myself up to glance across the garden. I couldn't see any people but there were shadows dancing across the grass as members of the Hyuuga clan were in a frenzy of worry.

"Nana!" Neji whispered in surprise, a delayed reaction if there had ever been one. I could tell how thrown off he was by both my actions and the noise outside (because of his use of my nickname instead of my full name). But he didn't continue and instead got out of bed and stood next to me by the window. We were silent as we tried to gather snippets of information of what was going on outside.

"She was taken!"

"He killed him?"

"We must tell the Hokage immediately."

The conversations continued but we didn't have time to listen to any more as the door opened and our father stormed in. He looked slightly panicked when he didn't see Neji immediately in bed but relaxed when he saw the both of us standing by the window, relief obviously washing through him.

"Father what happened?" Neji asked, worried. At this Hizashi took a step forward and grabbed Neji by the shoulders. Then I witnessed something I had never seen before as Hizashi bent down and gave Neji a kiss on his forehead. An ordinary gesture for a normal father, but Hizashi didn't do affection. Neji seemed to be even more shocked than I was and if he had any less control of his emotions his mouth would have been hanging open in astonishment of the situation. He repeated the gesture with me and then stood back to examine us both.

Neither of us dared say a word. His eyes were full of… regret? I didn't understand at first, my mind still reeling at the display of affection, when it dawned on me. He knew what would happen and he was ready to give his life for his brother. He may have had years of built up, valid, resentment towards his elder brother, but that didn't mean he didn't love him. They were brothers and I was sure that, no matter what, they would go to the ends of the earth for each other.

I couldn't help it. I started to cry. Not the childish wailing of a three year, but the quiet mourning of a child who was about to lose their father. Tears were streaming down my face, but I remained silent. I wanted to scream at the injustice of it all. I wanted to hug my father and tell him not to do it; that there had to be another way. I wanted to run away, faster and further than I had ever wanted to before, to simply just remove myself from such a hopeless situation. But I didn't. I just stood there and cried.

Hizashi held no scorn in his eyes for my tears. Instead he looked at me and gave a small, reassuring smile. His eyes glanced between his children, full of so much loss.

"I hope I have been a good father to you." He looked down and, although his expression did not change, I could almost feel the emotion welling up inside him. "Follow your duty children; for it is not a curse, but a privilege."

And he left.

I dropped to the floor and cried like I could never remember crying before. I don't think Neji understood what was happening, but at some point during my sobbing he must have moved me to the bed. I don't remember even falling asleep. I just cried at the whole damn situation and clung to my brother like he might disappear any second.

!

Neji and I were awoken early the next morning and informed of our father's death.

It was a near heartless recollection of the news. We were informed that he had handed himself over to the Kuma-nin, in his brothers place, in revenge for their fallen leader that Hiashi had killed, and had fulfilled his duty to protect the clan head. We were told that we should be proud of his sacrifice.

It was Neji's turn to cry now. I had used up all my tears the previous night and now just felt numb and tired. I tried to comfort my brother but he wouldn't let me, lashing out in his grief and pushing me away with all his will. He needed to be angry at something, anything. I didn't mind being on the receiving end for his emotions needed an outlet before he could supress the resentment deep within his heart. He wasn't like that for long and soon enough he was sitting on his bed, head boeed and breaths even. His face was the perfection of emotionlessness.

I knew I couldn't do much for him, apart from be there if he needed me. I needed him to know he was not alone. So I sat next to him, on the bed, and took one of his hands in mine. He held on to my hand like I had held onto him the previous night - as if I would disappear off the face of the earth if he let me out of his sight. His hand held so tightly onto mine that the whites of his knuckles were showing and my hand grew more and more painful from the pressure. His face remained blank of any feeling, but I knew it was there, and so held his hand just as tightly back.

I understood what my father had done. I would have done the same for Neji.

Nobody came to find us until lunchtime. We were informed that there would be a memorial that evening in honour of our father's memory and that we should dress in our best clothing to attend. It seemed they wanted to get the whole situation over and done with, to forget the whole incident and be done with it. There was no body to prepare for a burial as the Kumo-nin had taken it when they left, and so a simple stone was erected in the courtyard to honour the second sons sacrifice. The Hyuuga clan could not show weakness in the loss of a comrade. The mourning would be quick and done with within the day, and that was that.

Neji and I stood hand in hand at the front of the crowd alongside Hiashi, Hinata and her mother. No one said anything. Hiashi didn't seem to want to, silently battling with his emotions. Both Neji and I were too young in the clan's eyes to say our piece, and so we remained silent as well. Everyone was very grave, but strangely enough, none more than Hinata's mother. She looked at the memorial with a pale complexion and a look that wanted to cry but held it in at all costs. She was quick to leave when the ceremony was over, giving her condolences to us quickly and without making eye contact. Hinata followed behind her dutifully, but did manage to give me a small, sad smile. I appreciated it.

Neji did not engage with anyone that approached us, he simply nodded and ignored their questioning. I covered for him as effectively as I could but people just gave me an understanding smile and false, sympathetic words.

Most of those who had gathered to pay their respects had drifted off to get back to their duties. It was when there were few people left to witness the encounter that Hiashi approached Neji and I to give us his regrets. I understood that he must have been in as much pain as we were and so I was prepared to offer comfort to the clan head. Before I drew my eye from the memorial stone to look at my uncle, however, Neji stepped in and addressed my Uncle first.

"Hiashi-sama," Neji said with respect.

"Neji and Nanami," Hiashi said in reply. His voice was grave and deep, so much unlike its usual, much more cheerful sound. Almost like a different person, and yet grief can do that to people. "I can only offer you my deepest regrets for your father's death."

"Don't worry Hiashi-sama," I said to the floor with a tragic smile. I looked up at him with kindness and an open heart. They may have been Hyuuga but the brothers were close, even if their relationship was slightly strained nearer the end. "We understand we…" The breath was knocked out of me like it had never been before.

I met the eyes of my father with unconcealed shock.

He looked at me expectantly until he saw my expression and comprehension seemed to dawn on his face. He seemed to realize I had recognised him. I didn't know how everyone else seemed to miss it, or maybe everyone else knew and it was simply to up keep the image of the clan, but the man in front of me was without a doubt Hyuuga Hizashi.

I swallowed and looked down again, overcome by emotion. They switched. They switched!

This was beyond my comprehension. Neji finished the conversation with Hiashi and then quickly led me away from the courtyard, obviously concerned with my sudden muteness when I had been fine all afternoon. Before we rounded the corner I glanced back at my father and saw him looking at me with an odd expression. I couldn't pin point all the emotions playing across his face, this being one of the few times I had seen him this emotional, but the distinguishing one seemed to be fear. Fear of what, I couldn't say.

What I couldn't understand is why Neji hadn't noticed. He was so obviously our father and yet, no one else batted an eyelid at the fact a supposed dead man was walking around. I felt immense relief that he was alive, but at the same time also a deep sense of foreboding. What did this mean?

Obviously Hiashi had taken his rightful place as the one to die and Hizashi had taken over his brother's mantle. The death of a clan head with no immediate replacement was a huge problem in the shinobi world. Hinata was the heir but she would not be able to take her father's place until she was eighteen. The logical and most easy option would have been just for Hizashi to die in place of his brother, as horrible as that may be. But instead, in this crazy messed up world that seemed to have turned itself on its head, Hiashi had died and his younger brother was now the clan head.

If I was to guess, I would say that this situation would only be until Hinata came of age, but that was fourteen years away and Hizashi would have to pretend to be his brother for all that time. Talk about above and beyond the call of duty. Well, whatever was happening I had inadvertently allowed Hizashi to realize that I knew the clans new, dirty little secret, and I was sure that heads were going to roll. Metaphorical heads, of course.

All I wanted to know now was why they had swapped, and it wasn't long until I found out.

!

That evening I went to my own bed, realizing that both Neji and I needed some time alone with our thoughts after the horrors of the last few days. I put my nightclothes on and took my white ribbon out of my hair, putting it on my dresser next to my hairbrush. I just stood there in front of my mirror and studied myself. The black trousers of my pyjamas covered my bare feet and my hair now rested just past the base of my neck. My bright blue eyes contrasted with my straight jet-black hair, giving me an almost exotic look. Before I'd had blond hair and brown eyes… I had liked my brown eyes.

My hand reached up to my face and brushed against my cheek absentmindedly. At that moment I still had substantial amounts of baby fat, and I wondered idly what I would look like when my features sharpened. These mundane thoughts kept me distracted for a bit. I didn't want to think about today, it had been too difficult. I felt more emotionally drained than physically; my throat dry and my eyes heavy. I needed a rest, not only for the day but also for all the stress that came with being a member of this clan. With this clan and probably any clan really, there were always such great expectations.

Great Expectations. The memory of a book I had once studied at school skirted across my mind and I gave a slightly hysterical giggle. Throw a broken heart into this whole mess, like in that god-awful book they made us read, and I might have a psychotic breakdown.

It was sudden and unexpected and came with a sharp pain in my neck. Exhaustion hit me with all of its might and I felt my body begin to fall downwards. I knew instantly that someone had manipulated one of my pressure points, but could do little about it. I couldn't concentrate enough to put out my hands to catch myself and so braced myself for a painful impact. It never came however, instead I felt warm arms circle around me and pick me up, cradling me against a chest. Before my eyelids closed shut I looked up to my saviour and, for the second time that day, looked straight into my father's eyes.

They were full of so much pain, all directed at me, that I wanted to reach out and smooth away all the crinkles on his face.

_You'll get worry lines, _I thought stupidly, before unconsciousness claimed me.

!

I don't know how long I was asleep for, but when I awoke I had a horrible pounding in my head and my body felt heavy and useless. Not only this but a sharp tingling danced across the back of neck in painful bursts. With my eyes still closed I reached behind my head to try and soothe the pain, but as I lifted my arm I felt a hand close around my wrist and prevent the movement.

"You shouldn't touch it yet," a deep voice said.

I didn't recognise the voice at first due to the fogginess within my mind and the distracting pain at the top of my spine. Groggily, I opened my eyes and blinked until my vision was mostly clear and looked over to the owner of the voice. I wasn't surprised to see my father kneeling beside my bed, looking as if he hadn't got a wink of sleep in weeks. I looked towards the window and could just make out the beginnings of the predawn light trying to creep over the walls of the enclosure.

I swallowed thickly. My mind began to let me remember my last thoughts before I fell into unconsciousness and I once again closed my eyes - but this time it was in despair. I didn't want to open them, didn't want my father to confirm that he had done something unspeakable. I had been afraid of this happening, right from the moment I saw the fear in Hizashi's eyes when I had recognised him. I knew, but I had to ask anyway.

"What have you done?" My voice broke on the last word. I dared not open my eyes but I felt Hizashi let go of my wrist as if he'd been burnt.

"I had to do it," he whispered, his voice even more broken than mine. The emotion sounded strange and out of place coming from the man who had spent most of his life stoic and cold.

"Why?" I stressed the words with all the will I could muster. I felt hot betrayal sting my eyes and I squeezed them even more tightly shut, afraid I might start crying.

"The elders…" Hizashi drifted off as if unable to find the right words. I opened my eyes and sat up suddenly and without warning, all the blood rushing to my head at once. I had to steady myself by placing my hand on the floor beside me. I saw my father reach out in concern but stopped when I flinched away from him. His expression was strained and he swallowed heavily at my reaction, but I was too angry to care.

"What have you done?" I put as much hurt and hatred into those words as I could. I closed my eyes again and felt hot tears race down my cheeks_. I don't want to know! I don't want to know!_

But I had to. I could already feel it taking hold of me and I reached to the back of my neck once again to quiet down the sting that was slowly getting worse. However, Hizashi stopped me yet again from touching it.

"I told you, you shouldn't touch it yet. You could disrupt the chakra at this point, and I would have to do it again," his voice was stronger this time, but no less regretful. I yanked my arm free from his grip and turned my body completely to face him. I tried to look him in the eye but he avoided eye contact with me. My father never avoided eye contact with anyone, and this told me just how bad the situation was. I just stared at him, waiting for him to continue. Eventually he collected himself, took a steadying breath and looked me in the eye.

"The elders mentioned that it was a possibility that either you or Neji would recognise me when no one else would. My brother and I were identical twins, and because of this we shared practically the same chakra signature. The difference in chakra was so small that no one could possibly tell the difference between us. It was virtually impossible. The only distinguishing feature ever between us was my curse seal…" His voice faltered on these words and he looked away from me as he continued. "It can happen with children and parents on rare occasions. The close bond of blood that they share can mean that they can distinguish even the tiniest fluctuation in the others chakra network. This can mean, for example, that if a child is under the influence of the subtlest genjutsu in the world, then the parent can still detect it, no matter what. In the case here, you could tell I was not my brother.

"There would have been little problem in Neji recognising me, for he has the curse seal and we would be able make sure he could not tell a soul. You, however, were not under that kind of control." He looked at me once again, his expression grave.

"…Were…" I repeated, picking up on the past tense immediately. "Meaning that now…" Tears escaped from my eyes at the realization and I put my head in my hands.

Hizashi didn't say a word. He didn't need to. I was simply now just another slave, another pawn for the clan to do as it pleased. I was always so grateful to not be born with the Byakugan and be faced with a life of servitude. Now, however, it seemed I had no choice. I would do whatever they asked of me, because I practically had no free will of my own. My father, my very own father, had given me the very thing that had caused so much pain and bitterness in his own life.

"What does it mean?" I asked quietly, my question near muffled by my hands. I didn't want to look at him. _I hate him!_

"It…" I could hear Hizashi's own fight to hold in his emotions. "You have, imprinted on the back of your neck, a variation of the caged-bird seal. It means that you will never be able to tell a soul about my identity. You, the council of elders, Hiashi's wife and the Hokage, are the only ones who know. If this knowledge was to get out, it could mean political repercussions beyond our control." I couldn't deal with this information right now. So I asked what I had been wondering all afternoon.

"I don't understand why you are..? You were going to your death; I saw it in your eyes."

"My brother refused to let me die for him. He wouldn't listen to reason. His word is law in our clan and he decided to give his own life. The fool!" The last words were spat venomously and I looked up to see him turning his head away. Underneath my hatred I felt pity well up inside me. The man sitting before me was still a slave to his destiny, and couldn't even find solace in choosing his own death. He had even been forbidden to save his own brother. That had been taken away from him as well. I looked away to give him some privacy with his own despair.

"And your own curse seal?" I asked in a gentler voice, yet no less biting.

"I can only tell you this because of your own curse seal. Anything I tell you in confidence you will be physically unable to communicate to another person, unless I give you permission to do otherwise. What I am about to tell you is one of the most closely guarded secrets of the Hyuuga clan; there is a way to be rid of the seal." I breathed out a sign, expecting this answer. In those few words alone were the answers to the freedom of all past, present and future branch family members. It was a sickening thought.

We sat quietly for a few moments. And then the stinging in my neck began to increase ten fold and I couldn't help but let out a whimper at the pain. It was near blinding. I took deep, purposeful breaths. It was all I could do not to be sick and spill the contents of my stomach across my futon. I couldn't tell what was happening, all I could register was the pain, but I did recognise two big strong arms reach for me and hold me tightly. I wanted to push away, to scream at him to let go, but the pain was terrible and he was reassuring, and so I just cried into his kimono from the pain; both physical and emotional.

He was stroking my hair and whispering apologies over and over again. I had never thought that the ridiculously composed man could ever let himself go.

_Well it doesn't matter now,_ I thought with all the bitterness in the world,_ it's not like I can tell anyone._

My heart hurt at the harsh words I had thought. He was in just as much pain as I was.

After an immeasurable amount of time the pain abated and I pushed away from Hizashi. He let me go and stood up, looking down at me with an unreadable expression. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. I believed him, but that didn't make me hate him any less.

"No," I said in my grief ridden state, tired and drained. It was all too much and I just wanted to sleep. He waited for me to say more, and when I didn't he turned away from me and headed towards the door, his footsteps silent as a proper ninja's should be.

Yet, before he went I whispered into the darkness breathlessly, "You've taken away my freedom. I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you for this." With these words I lay back down and turned my back on my father, facing away from the door.

He left without another word.

!

**Thank you for your feedback and I look forward to hearing more!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Stamping on Butterflies **

Chapter 3

!

"_If you're betrayed, release disappointment at once. By that way, the bitterness has no time to take root." ― Toba Beta, My Ancestor Was an Ancient Astronaut_

!

Over the next few weeks' things changed.

The first thing to change was my hairstyle. I could no longer wear it up in a ponytail as it exposed the back of my neck, revealing to the world my hidden curse mark. Hizashi had called me to his office, his _new_ office, and told me that no one could know about the curse seal and that I was forbidden to tell anyone. Of course, I had to obey. I felt the curse seal tighten in response to the command and knew that I would be unable to reveal it to anybody. So I had removed my white ribbon from my hair and tied it round my wrist.

It had seemed as if he had used up all his regret the previous night and was now back to his harsh, emotionless self. Yet, I believed that deep down he was relieved to share his burden with someone else. To carry that alone would have been difficult, with the pressures of the council as well as keeping his identity quiet. But to have even just one of his children in his confidence was probably a big relief.

Resentment rose in me as I nodded my consent. "Yes Hyuuga-sama," I said stiffly.

His cold eyes sort me out and narrowed. He saw what I was doing and challenged it head on.

"You will refer to me as Hiashi-sama, just as you did your uncle," he told me stonily.

"No." I needed my rebellion, and more importantly than that I needed to see Hizashi as exactly who he was; my father. I was scared that if I followed the lie, I would start to believe it. Of course this was stupid and irrational but I needed some stability on a ground that seemed to be collapsing in around me. What I called him, unless it would reveal his actual identity, wasn't something he could control. I was challenging him, and he knew it.

"Leave," he directed to me, lowering his head back to his reading and continued to work as if I wasn't there. I allowed myself a small smile at the victory.

Later, when I thought about it, I think he needed that victory as well. He needed to be reminded who he was. Because I was the only one who was able to do that.

Neji dealt with our fathers 'death' how you would expect him to; with training and coldness. He never allowed anyone to get close to him emotionally again, and the only relationship he even attempted to maintain was his and mine. He loved me more than anything and wanted me to be the best I could be.

He didn't say it outright but I knew his thoughts; he couldn't bare the idea of losing me as well.

Neji was still Hinata's guardian but no longer did he have to be present as Hinata and I trained. Just as Hiashi had said we gained a new instructor to take over our studies. He was quick to criticise and harsh in his methods, and this caused Hinata's confidence to very suddenly and painfully drop. I tried to reassure the girl that he didn't mean it, but I would be lying.

It would seem that our instructor was simply just another branch family member with resentment towards the main house. Hinata was the heir to the Hyuuga and therefore, in the eyes of our instructor, it was a valid reason to take it out on her. He probably didn't even realize he was doing it. I started to dumb myself down a bit to spare Hinata some of the torment, as he seemed to enjoy comparing our abilities. I was ahead of Hinata but not by much. As I was about half a year older than her it meant I was slightly ahead in physical strength and abilities. The tiny age gap would hardly have mattered, but at that age the difference was noticeable and so Sensei picked it apart.

I don't think it would have been so bad, however, if it was not Hizashi's reaction to Hinata's struggles. When Hizashi came to witness mine and Hinata's progress he found fault in us both, Hinata for her weakness and me for holding back. My father was an intelligent man and he realized the situation as it was but he did nothing about it. When Hinata eventually went crying to her father to swap instructors because she couldn't keep up, he had told her to grow a backbone and deal with it. Obviously he said it in a much more eloquent way, but that was basically it.

So the tormenting of Hinata began just as Hiashi theoretically would have done eventually if he were alive to follow the original time-line. However, I had a feeling that Hizashi wasn't as bad as Hiashi would have been.

_I suppose that something's have to stay the same,_ but this thought wasn't a comforting one.

Hinata, I began to learn, was truly a gentle soul. I suggested to her once that she might one day like to become a medical ninja, because of her kind heart. Unfortunately, she took this as a grave insult and said that if she were a medic then she could not be a respectful clan heir. She said that she was already weak in her soft heart and that she didn't need more reasons for her father to despise her.

This was a sad thought, for I knew that Hizashi did not hate her. But I understood, however, that he did not see her as his daughter. He had a duty to look after her for the sake of his position as clan head and also for his brother memory. But he could not love her as his own. Hinata could obviously see the lack of love, as one of the Hyuuga's greatest prides was being able to read people, but in her eyes she saw it as her father turning his back on her.

Then her mother died in childbirth. Hinata became more withdrawn and shy. After the traumatic event she began to stutter and avoid confrontation. I began to spend more time with her when I could, and because of this our bond grew stronger. But soon I began to notice that at every available moment she would hide in my shadow. I tried to push her to the front but she was always so reluctant and stammered when put on the spot. She stopped stammering when it was just us though, and I began to see more and more of who the girl behind the blushes really was.

But the moment there was another person she would hide once again. This was especially bad with Neji and Hizashi. They were the two people she looked up to most, and they seemed to be the ones to least accept her. In all honesty I was the only one in the whole compound that seemed to be able to give her the time of day. I didn't understand why, at first, as she was the heir and therefore should be given the proper respect. But when I thought about it I realized that for the branch family members she represented their subjugations, and to the main family members she was weak, and weakness would not be tolerated. The death of her mother, her only other ally apart from me in this constricting place, caused emotional scars that even the Byuakugan couldn't see. So I did all I could for her and hoped it was enough.

Hizashi grieved, as he should, playing the part perfectly and then continuing back to his work. Well, almost completely back to his work. I watched quietly, from the sidelines, as he handed over his niece to a wet nurse gently and reluctantly. He almost smiled, almost.

"What are you going to call her?" I had asked him quietly.

He looked down at me, surprised that I would willingly address him after months of obedient replies and rebellious silence. "Hanabi," he answered with gentleness in his eyes I rarely saw.

I believe that he found himself unable to love Hinata like a daughter because when he looked at her he saw the father he was not. He was not Hiashi and could never be that person for Hinata. So he pushed her away and told her to get on with it. She was three years old and could look after herself. After all, in a village where death was as common as a cold, the complete independence of a three year old was not unusual.

But Hanabi was a new child, and therefore she could be Hizashi's child. He could raise Hanabi up in memory of his brother, without his brother's memory tainting every encounter. I would witness in the coming years how Hizashi would dote on Hanabi.

Neji wasn't much of a help either. He was caught up in his own grieving and became even more harsh and reclusive than before. He would flinch away from public displays of affection and looked down on any weaknesses. Hinata wasn't by any means a crybaby, but everyone had their limit and, due to our Sensei, she was pushed right to the edge on several occasions. She endured, but that was not enough, and any respect that Neji had held for her before deteriorated quickly and without mercy with every tear she shed.

"But Neji, it's not fair!" I told him on one of our rare afternoons off. We were sitting in the garden underneath a cheery blossom tree. I was practicing my Kanji with ink and paper scattered everywhere, and Neji had a coverless book open in his lap.

"Life is not fair, Nanami. You should have learnt this by now," he sneered bitingly.

"And why must Hinata face the brunt of your bitterness!" I retorted. As soon as the words left my mouth I had regretted them. Neji closed the book with a snap and stood abruptly.

"Maybe you are too young to understand," he all but whispered. His hand reached to his forehead and his fingers brushed across the bandages. "Maybe you never will."

I opened my mouth to retort, saying that I did understand, more than he knew. But the words were lost in my throat as a strange sensation came over me and I was unable to remember how to form words. I felt my neck tingle and I cursed the heavens. He just looked down at me with unrestrained jealousy. I felt small and betrayed by that look.

He left me sitting there with my hands clenched in anger and my work forgotten.

Things were tense for a while between us after that. He no longer spent his free time with me, no matter how often I invited him. He worked hard but began to lose himself again. But I knew how much he was hurting underneath, and so every chance I got I imposed my presence upon him. He no longer allowed me into his room in the middle of the night when I got scared, and so I began to jump on his bed every morning to wake him up.

The first few times he had lashed out and I had had a chance to practise my very underdeveloped dodging skills. When he knocked me down with a smirk and a superior look I simply stuck out my tongue and brushed myself off. After that he began to get up before me to avoid the rude awakening. But then again I always was an early riser and I would not allow him to beat me at my own game. So I began to get up even earlier to catch him out. We continued on with this silliness for a few weeks until we got to a point where we were getting up at ridiculous times in the morning to try and win the childish game.

Soon enough it turned into an all-night stake out which had eventually led to me getting bored and attempting to sneak into the kitchens for a midnight snack. Neji had, of course, followed me simply to try and dissuade me from breaking the rules. He didn't seem to mind too much when I shared my hot chocolate with him however. We were sitting in the kitchen when Cook walked in. He had also been looking for a midnight snack and was just as much caught in the act as we were.

At first he tried to tell us off for being out of bed and raiding the kitchens in the middle of the night. He said that he should go and wake up Hiashi-sama so we could get a good spanking. Neji began to apologise profusely, trying to drag me away with him. However, cook wasn't getting one over me.

"Look, I know you're not supposed to be here either," I said, calling his bluff. "So you wouldn't go and tell Hyuuga-sama on us because then you would get in trouble as well." Cook frowned crossly, knowing what I said was the truth. "And also…" I sniffed for dramatic affect and wiped my eyes as if angry I had been crying. I saw Cooks expression soften. _Hook._ "It has been almost a year…" Sniff. _Line_. "Since…" and I started to cry. I took a breath as if I was about to wail when I heard a shushing noise coming from Cook and felt a hand cover my mouth in panic.

"Hey don't cry, look I've got some extra chocolate in the pantry, my special collection. Would you like some?" _and SINKER!_

Neji had just stood there with his mouth wide open in abject horror, astonishment and, although he would never admit it, he was impressed.

Later on we both fell asleep on Neji's bed in the early hours of the morning, exhausted and sick from too much chocolate.

I think he enjoyed the childishness of it, but he would never admit it of course. When he bought me a pair of black leather, fingerless gloves for my fourth birthday I knew our relationship was saved, but Neji's heart was still closed and off limits to everyone else.

Time past quickly and before I knew it Neji had turned five and was sent off to the academy. I went to his induction ceremony by myself and sat at the back all alone. Hizashi had given me permission to attend without my even asking. He was as stoic as ever, but I knew he felt regret for not being able to come along as well and witness his son's entrance into the academy. None of the other Hyuuga's came with me either and I hadn't told Neji that I would be present. I watched as his name was called and he went up onto stage with the rest of his class and took a pledge to: love the village, train hard and remain of an able body and mind. The crowd cheered and I clapped along with them.

Afterwards I went to locate my brother in the crowd. It was easy as I was so small and so could dodge between the legs of everyone around me. I caught sight of him standing off to the side, leaning against a wall looking, well, cool.

_He will definitely be a heart breaker when he grows up_, I thought fondly.

"Neji!" I called out with a smile. Before he had time to register that it was I who had called his name I had tackled him with a running hug, laughing joyously as I did. He caught me and I even heard a little chuckle escape from his lips.

When he put me down I could see in his eyes just how grateful he was that I had been there to witness his admittance into the academy. Hardly moments later he was called in to begin his first day of school and I wished him luck and bid my farewell.

I had high hopes for Neji at school to somehow become more open once again and happy. It was wishful thinking. He was, obviously, top of his class in everything, but just enough not to be called a super-genius and so couldn't graduate early. He was furious at this of course. He felt like he was being held back and that everyone else was just plain stupid.

I watched more and more as he was drawn deeper and deeper into despair. I thought he had grieved, but the more I looked I realized that he had just pushed the feelings underneath all the anger he could muster up. I had to do something, but I was completely at a loss.

So I did the only thing I could do; I went to see my father.

One evening I knocked on his door hesitantly and he bid me enter. When he looked up from his work his left eyebrow rose in silent enquiry as he saw me standing timidly in front of his desk. I had never before sort him out; our only interactions from the moment he place the curse seal on me, over a year ago, had all been initiated by him.

"I am surprised to see you here," he said nonchalantly, but yet unable to hide the curiosity from his voice and the… hope? It was odd and unnerving and so I ignored it in favour of the matter at hand.

"It's about Neji." Immediately his demeanour changed to hard and unyielding. I knew before I asked what he would say.

"There is nothing I can do about his situation. He must overcome it in his own time." He then went back to his work as if he considered the conversation done.

"But… He needs reassurance. His growing resentment is destroying his ability to make friends or to see the value in others. He only sees strength," I urged him. I took a step forward unconsciously and Hizashi followed the moment with practised eyes. He sat back in his chair and placed his hands together in front of him on the desk.

"What do you suppose that I can do? I am no longer his father, and as his uncle he will not accept any aid from me. No, he must deal with this without my help." His tone spoke of no argument.

"Why does this entire family think they have to do everything by themselves?" I cried desperately. It was as much out of frustration at my father as it was at pent up opinions I wasn't allowed to express. It was ironic; the only place where I could express how I truly felt was in front of the man who was forcing me to keep such terrible secrets from the rest of the world.

"I did not say that. I simply said that _I_ would not help him. There is nothing stopping _you_ from helping your brother." His tone was calculating and suspiciously flat. I studied him for a few moments before it dawned on me. He was testing me! Of course, he made a valid point. What could he do really? I knew this all along and yet I came to him anyway. The weight of both Neji's and Hinata's worries on my shoulders had built over the past year and it seemed it had reached a point in which I could no longer bare it without asking someone, anyone, for help. The only person I could ask was the one who I had been trying to avoid at all costs.

I saw something unrecognisable flicker in Hizashi's eyes and I felt as if we had passed a milestone. Apprehension settled in my bones.

"What do you suggest then?" I asked hesitantly. He studied me for a few more minutes before once again looking down at his desk and continuing to work. I knew I wouldn't get an answer and felt stupid for getting my hopes up. I was about to turn to leave when Hizashi spoke again, not even looking up from his work.

"Every Sunday afternoon you shall come here and I will begin to give you lessons in whatever I deem necessary." I was puzzled at first and stood where I was in confusion. However, I had picked up the obvious dismissal and, as soon as I had collected my wits, I left my father's study more perplexed than when I had entered.

I was no closer to helping Neji with his internal struggle and I seemed to have lost my Sunday afternoons to more training. Yay.

The following year was difficult. Hinata became more nervous and Neji became more, well, stuck up. I tried, but it didn't seem as if I had Naruto's special touch with changing people's hearts for the better. I had yet to see the blonde ball of energy around Konoha, but then again I knew that he was very young still and therefore in danger of being kidnapped for the extraction of the Kyuubi. Therefore they would have been keeping a very close eye on him at this age. I didn't think much else on the future as, apart from Neji's death that would happen years from now, nothing directly affected me. But I did keep up on my journal of the events that I could remember from the show from my previous life.

My previous life wasn't amazing nor was it particularly dull. It was normal. I missed everyone from there of course, but it couldn't be helped and there were more important things to worry about. I had a new family now that needed looking after. The one thing I did miss, however, was video games. They didn't exist in this world and for the life of me sometimes I just really wanted to play pacman or Call of Duty or even Sims Goddammit!

My training improved greatly and I got better and better with the boe staff. But that wasn't saying much. If you were to judge me by the standard of a Grade I would say that I was so bad I was ungradable. My instructor reassured me that I was actually well passed my level for my age group, but that wasn't reassuring considering how epic I knew my generation were going to be. But I preserved and grew stronger.

Hizashi spent every Sunday afternoon with me and we spent most of this time playing Shogi. Shogi was basically chess with a few variations, and if I was going to be honest with you I was never very good at chess. It wasn't so much the game that I struggled with, more my lack of motivation to complete it. I didn't see the point of such a boring game, therefore I got bored, and the other person won. Sucks right? But I was never very competitive and would rather just avoid the whole hassle.

At first, when I had grasped the concept of the game so quickly Hizashi almost seemed excited, as if I was going to turn out to be a genius. However, it seemed as if it was not meant to be. As it turned out in this world it wasn't due to motivation that I struggled to complete a game, but the fact I had such a short attention span. It got to a point where even I was annoyed at how I couldn't pay attention to the simple game for longer than ten minutes. I would start off really well, get distracted, and BAM I had lost.

Up until a certain point within a game I would do really well. But I would always lose. My father always told me that had I not lost concentration I would have beaten him. That was a big thing coming from my father as he was actually a very intelligent man and, unless up against a Nara, would beat most.

So apparently I was smart but had concentration issues. So sue me. I didn't count myself smart, however, for I was technically a grown woman within a childs body and so had the intelligence of an adult. But I couldn't rightfully explain that to people, so I was just looked like a particularly bright young girl.

The year that both Hinata and I turned five we were sent to the academy. I expected something along the lines of what happened originally, with Kurenai coming along and taking Hinata under her wing. It seemed as if that was something especially reserved for when Hiashi was clan leader and thanked the heavens there wasn't a repeat.

The Sunday before we were to start at the academy I was sitting with Hizashi on the decking outside the main house playing Shogi. I was in a particularly absentminded mood that day and so Hizashi was having no luck teaching me about affective strategies. Halfway through a particularly difficult play the air suddenly grew thick and I could feel that my father was about to tell me something important. I was expecting something about family honour and upholding the family name, for I knew Hizashi had given exactly that lecture to Neji, but I was unfortunately wrong.

"Do you remember when I once told you that you would have different responsibilities than Neji within the clan, because you do not have our Kekkei-genkai?" he said gravely, eyes still on the Shogi board.

I nodded an affirmative. He looked up, his eyes fixed on me, deadly serious.

"Tomorrow at your ceremony you shall find many eyes on yourself," he said gravely. "You are an anomaly within the Hyuuga clan and because of this the outside world will want to exploit this as they will see you as a weakness."

"I can deal with it," I said confidently. I think I knew when I was being used; I was not a naïve child.

"Nanami." This made my back straighten and set my teeth on edge. He never used my name unless it was really serious. "Within our clan we do not allow women who have the byakugan to marry outside of these walls. This is because they may birth a child who also has the Byakugan. If this were to happen then the child would be out of our reach, as the women would typically then be a part of the husband's family, and therefore there would be a great danger that the secrets of our clan's kekkei-genkai would fall into the wrong hands."

Once again I nodded in understanding, not seeing where this was going, or rather not wanting to believe it.

"I know you are young," he continued, "But I must warn you of this possibility now. Because you do not possess our dojutsu you will be allowed to marry outside of the clan, and I am sure that the elders will want to use you to their advantage to create a strong alliance with another clan. Do you understand?"

I breathed in, and then out almost excruciatingly slowly. Yes, I understood. "An arranged marriage," I muttered, my complexion paling at the idea. I had never been in love, not in my previous life or in this one, but like every girl I had always entertained the idea of marrying someone who I was in love with. I guess I should have expected this, but it was still a difficult blow.

"Yes, an arranged marriage." His eyes were soft and regretful. All along, even before I had the curse seal, I was stuck with a duty to the clan I had no control over and would have to undertake no matter what. It was only ever the illusion of freedom, but now that illusion had been taken away.

I gave another resigned sigh.

"Thank you for telling me," I said with sullenness in my voice.

"We have not officially announced to all the clans that we have a child within our mists which does not possess the Byakugan. It will be a shock considering as it hasn't happened in just under one hundred years. But considering the other children within your coming academy class you should not stick out too much. You should be spared the worst of it." I nodded and acknowledged his reassuring words, even if they did little to quiet my now racing heart.

_What was going to happen now?_ I wondered in distress. _Most of the clan heirs are in my year at school and therefore I am most likely to end up marrying one of them! _

I couldn't even begin to predict the repercussions of the situation.

!

The next day I tried to put thoughts of arranged marriages and the like to the back of my mind.

The whole ceremony was extremely exciting and I simply looked like a child looking forward to becoming a Shinobi. But I was ecstatic, not because I was going to learn how to be a ninja as I was already doing that with my clan training, but because I was going to see all the main characters of Naruto together for the first time. How cool was that!

Hinata and I were put in line with the other children and, just like the previous year with Neji's ceremony, our names were called out one by one. There were about 30 in our class, but I only knew those of the rookie 9. First out of the nine to be called up was "Aburame Shino" who looked just as you would expect; he had yet to acquire his dark glasses but I could see one or two kikaichu bugs crawling on his clothing. After Shino came "Akimichi Choji" and, quite honestly, I almost cried at how cute he was. His big chubby cheeks and typical bag of potato chips were all there, of course, and I promised myself I would try and make friends with the boy.

We soon got to the 'H's and "Haruno Sakura" walked onto stage. However, it wasn't with the high confidence I seemed to have recalled from the show, but with bangs hiding her forehead and unsure shuffles of her feet. Poor girl definitely had self-confidence issues. Before I could blink twice "Hyuuga Hinata" was called out and Hinata, in her shy-but-incredibly-endearing way stepped out of the line and took her place next to the others. Then it was my turn.

When "Hyuuga Nanami" was called out no one reacted apart from with the polite clapping that had been the same for everyone else up to this point. However, when I stepped out of the line and into place next to my cousin there was more murmuring than clapping. I tried not to react to it but I could feel the tiniest bit of colour rise in my cheeks. I had always been fine with attention, but this had been for the wrong reasons. As the next name on the list was read people turned away from me and looked to the next member of the class. This allowed me to calm down and I made my body relax.

"Inuzuka Kiba" was next and I am not ashamed to say I almost fangirled when I saw a puppy Akamaru sitting on Kiba's shoulder. Kiba had yet to get the tattoo's on his face that indicated that he was part of the nin-dog clan, but he still had his wild hair and pointy teeth to identify him as from that particular family. He practically strolled onto the stage. After that was "Nara Shikamaru", who was also just as one would expect. He slouched and had his hair up in the spikey ponytail, with an uneven hair line and a bored look on his face.

After them we had the two main characters themselves "Uchiha Sasuke" followed by "Uzumaki Naruto". Sasuke seemed more cheery than he had been in the series, but that was about the only difference. I suppose if you had had your entire clan annihilated by your brother then you probably would be a bit doom and gloom as well. Naruto was simply Naruto; energy, energy and energy on top of overbearing confidence and more energy. He didn't yet have the orange jumpsuit, but somehow he managed to wear a lot of orange anyway. And in the place of his ninja headband he wore a pair of mad-scientist googles. Somehow he pulled off this look rather effectively.

Lastly was "Yamanaka Ino" who was simply put small, blond and beautiful. When she had joined us all on stage we were then instructed to say the oath and when we had all recited it word for word the crowd cheered.

Afterwards the children ran to their parents or clansmen in an excited hurry. I was no different. Neji was with Hizashi and, as Hinata went to present herself to her father, I went and forced Neji to give me a hug. He complied even if reluctantly.

"You will not come crying to me if you are beaten in a spar," he ordered. I sniggered at his serious tone.

"Of course I won't," I said rolling my eyes. "What if the spar is accidental though? If I get bullied you better sort them out!" I order back, just as serious.

Neji gave me a dry stare and I raised my eyebrow in challenge. "The day you get bullied is the day that I am no longer top of the class. You will not get bullied."

"Are you… complimenting me?" I asked in mock astonishment.

"Certainly not," Neji said, with complete seriousness. I told you before; he didn't have a sense of humour. "You seem to be able to talk your way out of most difficult situations. If the person manages to land a hit, I think he should receive an award of some kind."

"Gee… thanks big brother," I muttered, unimpressed.

"Nanami, come here," Hizashi voice commanded. As an obedient child I walked over to my father and bowed respectively to him.

"Hyuuga-sama," I said in an obedient voice. Had I looked I would have been Hizashi's eye twitch in annoyance. All the Shogi games we had played and he still hadn't gotten me to call him Hiashi-sama in public. Nanami: one, Hizashi: Nil.

"These are Uchiha Fugaku the head of the Uchiha clan, and his wife Mikoto. They wanted to meet you," Hizashi spoke formally, but not without a significant look in my direction.

"It is a pleasure to meet you both," I said politely and gave a perfect straight-backed bow to the Uchiha clan leaders.

"Our son is to be in your class. I hope you will become friends," Mikoto said kindly to me in an extremely condescending voice.

I reframed myself from snapping back with a sassy comment and instead went for "I look forward to meeting him." Accompanied with the most innocent, polite smile I could muster. Mikoto bought it like a kid in a candy store and I knew, were she a lesser woman, she would have reached out and grabbed my cheek. What can I say? I'm adorable.

They left after that, and I had to stop my smile evolving into a wicked grin. I looked to Hizashi, who had his usual blank face on, but I could tell he had been amused by my antics. But none the less he seemed pleased with my performance.

A number of other clan leaders approached us wanting to meet the infamous non-byakugan child, including the Aburame and the Inuzuka. Both clans had always had very strong relation with the Hyuuga and Hizashi treated them with the utmost respect. Kiba's mum was brilliant.

"Just a word of warning," said the untraditional clan leader. "You might want to prove this one's legitimacy before you start marrying her off."

"She is my late brother's child," he told her stoically.

"Fair enough. I just know I would be suspicious of a pretty thing like her, I can tell she's much more boisterous than most that come from your clan." She took a sniff of the air and smiled down at me, displaying her large canines. "No offense sweetie, I'm sure you'll one day be just as big a stick in the mud as your uncle here."

I grinned with unrestrained amusement. "Non-taken," I said genuinely. She laughed and patted me on the head before strolling off in search of her son. I could tell Hizashi was fuming at her nerve, and I was tempted to turn to my father and ask in an oh-so-innocent voice "What does illegitimate mean?" I didn't, of course, as I didn't have a death wish.

Hizashi later explained to me that Hiashi and Tsume used to be on the same genin team and this was one of the reasons that the Hyuuga and Inuzuka had such good ties.

"What was that about?" Neji asked with confusion and suspicion when people had stopped approaching

"Don't ask." I just shook my head, clear exasperation written across my features, "It doesn't matter anyway." Neji gave me a look that said he clearly didn't believe me, but dropped the subject none the less.

"You are both representing your clan in the academy. Behave as expected," Hizashi said briskly. Before Hinata or I could reply he had left. Hinata eyes followed after him with a disappointed expression. She had confided in me that today maybe her father would recognize that she was going to be a great Shinobi. I had warned her not to get her hopes up but she had gone and done it anyway.

"Come on Hinata; let's start our first day of school." I gently guided her away from where Hizashi had been standing and we headed towards the main building. I waved goodbye to my brother and thus began our first day of school.

**Thank you for all your lovely comments and I'm glad that a lot of you enjoyed the plot twist. Don't worry there will certainly be more of those later on! Who doesn't love an unexpe****cted corner? There will be hints of romance as we go along but nothing really happens until Nana gets a bit older. All will be revealed in due course and I look forward to seeing what you think.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter Four

!

"_I don't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me." ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban_

!

First day of school was not what I expected; mostly because it involved me getting punched in the face.

After dragging Hinata inside we were directed to our new classroom to meet our fellow shinobi-in-training and the man who would be our sensei for the entirety of our academy education. Of course, I knew it was going to be Iruka-sensei, but nothing could prepare me for the 19 year-old man who stood at the front of the classroom with an extremely naive smile on his face. He was so obviously new at this job. I just hoped he didn't tell the class that he was a newly qualified teacher; because they would make his life hell.

"Good afternoon class, I will be your teacher. You may call me Iruka-sensei. You will be my very first class at the academy." Too late.

I could almost feel the excitement roll off of Naruto. I felt bad for the guy, I really did. He would come to learn the error of his ways in time, but right now all I could predict for him was a very bumpy ride. But then again it would explain a lot about the bond that Iruka and Naruto shared later on as they both grew into themselves as student and teacher.

So after the customary introduction we started on the basics of being a Shinobi. It was incredibly boring. I sat next to Hinata and some other boy who I didn't know and who seemed too interested in the lecture to want to goof off with me anyway.

This meant I had to sit still and listen, something I had never been very good at. For the clan kids in the room all of what he was saying was obvious; it was something we had all grown up knowing. But for the civilians it was the first step towards their goal, and so I tried not to begrudge them for their existence.

As the lecture went on I began to contemplate how I wanted my academy years to play out. Chances were that all the academic stuff that we were to learn during our time at the here was well within my capabilities to preform and outdo considering my actual mental age. In regards to the physical stuff I would be above average compared to the majority of the class, and that was only due to my special training with the Hyuuga. So I would easily be at the top of the class in a written exam, and although I would have competition from the other clan kids, I might even get to be top of the class if I continued to train really hard.

I weighed up the pros and cons of working hard and paying attention. Quite frankly I really couldn't be arsed. I mean, I would continue to train with my clan and my bow staff (which I loved and now considered my baby as far as one could consider an inanimate object their child) and would try my hardest to get better and better at that. But I knew from what Neji had told me that when we were to spar in class it was in hand to hand combat and therefore I wasn't allowed to use my staff. Annoying but unavoidable. Therefore, I decided that I would be average. Not the worse and not the best but just in the middle.

When lunch came around we were sent out into the courtyard to mingle. Now, I had yet to meet any other children apart from Neji and Hinata, and I would not consider either of them very normal because they were so… calm. I mean really calm I couldn't even get my head around it.

Because it seemed that all the other children were really, really not calm.

Everyone was screaming and shouting and bitching and oh-my-god I needed to find a quiet corner to sit down in and avoid the little children who insisted on pulling my hair.

I had been looking forward to starting school because I thought it would be a change from the secluded, stoic atmosphere of the clan compound. Oh how wrong I was. I blamed Hinata and Neji for lulling me into a false sense of security about the personalities of young children.

Don't get me wrong, I loved kids, but when you were stuck as a kid in the middle of a playground in the middle of a shinobi village where sitting still wasn't really taught in the syllabus; it was a bit much. I was technically an adult and my patience could only last so long.

And then someone pulled my hair again.

"Hinata, I'm sorry I have no patience today," I told her honestly. "If I get my hair pulled one more time I'm going to hit someone." I shrugged slightly and smiled up at my cousin. She looked at me and I could tell she knew I was being serious about the possibility of hitting someone.

"Umm…" She was unsure what to do now and I knew that if I went and sat down she would follow me dutifully. If that happened I would feel bad for keeping her away from potential friends. I knew she was too shy to approach anyone by herself and I would have to help her; lest she rely on me for company for the rest of our academy lives.

"Right," I muttered. I looked around the courtyard for a victim to impose the quiet little girl on. When I saw Shino at the edge of the playground, looking at his feet with his hands in his pockets, and every now and again glancing at a different group of children playing together, I knew I had found the perfect candidate. From my memories I understood that Shino was similar to Hinata in his disposition and therefore probably just as shy.

I took Hinata's hand, for the second time that day, and began to drag her towards the Aburame. He didn't notice our approach at first but I wasn't disheartened and kept an open mind that, hopefully, Hinata could gain a lifelong friend.

"Nana, what are you doing?" Hinata asked with a worried voice. "I thought you wanted to go and sit down."

"Relax; I'm just going to help you make a new friend." I was a good person, I decided. I would help Hinata make a new friend and then go and sit in under a tree somewhere and sulk. As we approached him Shino looked up from his shoes curiously, and then seemed to straighten up as if preparing for a very difficult conversation.

"Hello!" I announced joyously. "You're Shino aren't you?"

"Yes, I am. And you are the Nanami, the Hyuuga without the Byakugan, and you are Hinata the Hyuuga clan heir." Shino was very matter of fact. Therefore, I just knew he wouldn't appreciate me pussyfooting around the problem at hand and so I decided to dive straight in.

"First; it's Nana, not Nanami. Second; you're shy," I announced in the same tone he had addressed us.

He turned to me and I could see a calculating look, weighing up what I was in fact doing. His reply was simply: "Yes."

"Well, I would like you to meet Hinata – I mean officially meet her and not just know her name. She is also very shy and calm, you're also very calm by the way, and I just thought that both of you would get on like a house on fire!" Both Hinata and Shino looked at me for a moment like I had lost my senses, then looked at each other. Hinata blushed the deepest red she could probably go and let out a very undignified squeak.

Shino seemed to pause, studied the little girl, and then said in a shy voice a very quiet: "okay."

"Yay!" I yelled, taking Hinata's high pitched noise as an affirmative. I turned to my cousin, wished her luck, and left.

Okay, maybe not such a nice person, considering I had basically just pushed Hinata in the deep end of the pool and told her to sink or swim. But the same could be said for Shino, and therefore they would both be in the same boat… or maybe not in the same boat, if they're both swimming in the water- or sinking as the case may be.

I lost myself in thought for a moment, just one moment, and someone came over and pulled my hair. I was not joking when I said someone was going to get hit if my hair got pulled one more time. So I turned, fist ready, for I always came through on my word, and stopped dead when I saw who it was who had pulled my hair.

Naruto's big blue eyes were half closed in a flinch and I watched as he brought his hand up to his face to shield himself. I immediately felt guilt rise in my chest and lowered my hand with a small pout. Dam, I really needed to hit someone. Instead, I opted for a very calm and collected question.

"Why did you pull my hair?!" Okay, so maybe I shouted just a tiny, tiny bit.

Naruto looked at me in shock and lowered his hand from his face. Suddenly, the scared little boy turned to a child full of bravado and confidence. "Because you're going to play with me!" he announced to everyone in the vicinity.

_I take back what I thought earlier; I hate little kids._

"No," I told him simply and the little boy looked crestfallen. Naruto probably just wanted a friend but was going about the process of acquiring one in the wrong way. I had done my good deed for today in helping Hinata, and so would help Naruto tomorrow. Maybe. I looked around and spotted a group of boys playing Ninja. "Go play with them."

"They don't want to play with me," murmured Naruto with a pout. "Why won't you play with me?" he demanded almost hesitantly. I looked at the child in front of me up and down. He was wearing an orange short sleeved top with shorts and open toe sandals. He had scruffy hair, bleeding knees and a snotty nose. In essence he was a normal little child who wanted a friend. Taking my silence as a bad sign he stepped away and crossed his arms; frowning at the floor and trying not to cry. My heart almost broke.

"Look I'll… I'll play with you." His face lit up like a firework and I gave a hesitant smile in return. God, what had I gotten myself into? "But not right now."

"Why not right now? What's your name anyway? I'm Naruto Uzumaki and I'm going to be Hokage one day!" His demeanour changed so rapidly I almost got whiplash. I sighed to myself in regret. Why couldn't I have just told him to go away? Oh well, too late now.

"My names Nana and I don't want to play now because I'm tired and want to sit down, and if one more person pulls my hair I'm going to hit someone." As I said these words I had already began to walk away from Naruto. Unfortunately he seemed to take that as a hint to follow me, and I resigned myself to the company of the little blond tag along.

However, before I could find a nice place to sit and recuperate, a felt something painfully collide with the back of my head. I stumbled forward at the unexpected impact but Naruto caught me before I could lose my footing.

"Oh no," he whispered, worried. He stepped back, let go as if I had burnt him and looked at me with fear as if he expected me to run. I gave him a questioning look as I rubbed the now forming bruise on the back of my head; tears stinging the corners of my eyes at the pain. _Ow, that really hurt. _

I looked around to find the perpetrator of the crime and witnessed the group of boys who had been playing ninja earlier now looking at us with smug expressions plastered on their faces.

"Okay, so those boys just threw a stone at me. Correct?" I asked Naruto. I pursed my lips in annoyance and narrowed my eyes.

"Well, they weren't aiming for you," he muttered to the floor, refusing to look me directly in the eye. _Of course they weren't. They were aiming for you._

"Yeah, well they hit me and they don't seem like they regret it. I should really go and tell them to shove off." _But I really can't be bothered. Do I have to?_ I glanced at Naruto and witnessed as his eyes were shinning in awe.

"You would stand up for me?" His voice was full of hope. Well there was my answer. This little boy had not yet found his own feet in the world; had not put his foot down to crying over being alone and dealing with it. At this moment all he wanted was someone to care about him. I pinched the bridge of my nose as I began to feel a headache approaching at both the situation and the bruise on the back of my head.

"I'm going to regret this. I can tell." I was picking my fights poorly, I knew. It would be five against two and I could tell they were all at least a year older than us. I would have to use all my skills available to try and bullshit my way out of this one. Oh joy.

I strolled over to the boys leisurely, taking my time sizing each of them up. They were the type with big muscles and no brains and would most likely end up as career Chunin on the field. None of them were clan kids fortunately, but that didn't mean they couldn't fight and do some damage. I stood just out of reaching distance from them and raised my eyebrow in expectation.

"You threw a rock at me." It wasn't a question.

"Why you hanging around with this loser?" the biggest boy in the middle sneered. _Obviously the ring leader,_ I summarized as I watched the other boys nod and grunt unintelligibly. They were children but that didn't mean they had to act like cave men.

"You mean Naruto? I can hang out with anyone I choose thank you very much." I used the most I'm-in-a-clan-and-you're-not voice I could muster, and this seemed to make them shrink back slightly. Even if they were civilians they still lived in the hidden leaf village and so had respect for clans and their members. However, I didn't have any obvious distinction that said I was a clan member and they quickly recovered from the knee jerk reaction to the breed authority I possessed as a Hyuuga.

"Who are you to talk so confidently to us? You're just a first year," the leader once again sneered at me.

I really didn't like the idea of name dropping and having everyone know I was a Hyuuga. I didn't have the Byakugan which tended to be the defining factor of my clan. Any academy student who realized I was a Hyuuga probably wouldn't even think it was odd that I had normal eyes and even might pity me for being the odd one out in my family. Therefore name-dropping didn't do me any good and would probably bring up their expectations and cause them to overestimate me. In other words; not helpful.

So no one really knew which family I belonged to because, let's face it, no one was paying attention at the ceremony to anyone else's name. The only ones who might even possibly know who I was were my class mates and most of them were clan heirs anyway and had their own problems to deal with.

"Who am I? I'm the person you just threw a rock at for no other reason other than because I was standing next to Uzumaki here." My voice grew more and more emotionless with each word. "Leave him alone if you know what's good for you." What was I saying? These were all threats that I definitely could not pull through with and I was just throwing them around willy-nilly. I felt like face palming but held it together remarkably well. My face was blank and my voice quiet, giving it a rather creepy edge. I watched doubt flicker in the leader's eyes.

Good, I could work with that. Even if it was my first day that didn't necessarily mean that I couldn't handle myself. Geniuses were more common than one would believe, especially when they had been specially conditioned by their clan. So I bluffed my heart out.

I paused and looked at the leader up and down with an unimpressed expression. I watched him tense and witnessed as his whole group reacted to their bosses body language with hesitant looks towards me. I turned around to leave, already bored with the confrontation, and wanting to make a dramatic exit. I knew if it went on any longer a fight would break out, and so attempted to cut it short. They really weren't worth my breath anyway, and Naruto seemed over the moon with my interference. I began to walk away, yet didn't completely turn my back as I wasn't stupid. But just as I had taken only two steps away the leader, with lightening quick speed, reached out to me with an ugly look on his face and grabbed onto my hair and pulled.

It was just reflex from then on. After all the training I had gone through over the past few years it was only natural for me to act out in violent way to a frustrating situation. I turned around, and with a raise fist I punched him square in the face. I felt his nose break under the pressure and a grim sense of satisfaction passed threw me. My hand ached from the hit but remained otherwise unscathed thanks to my leather gloves. I pulled back and shook my hand slightly, raising an eyebrow at the little boy with the bloody nose, and I couldn't stop the small smirk that escaped onto my mouth.

His group were looking at me in awe. Obviously he was a difficult opponent to face and this just made me feel all the more smug for having just smashed his face in. Unfortunately it didn't take long for the leader to recover and he came at me with full force. But due to the head injury I had given him he seemed more disorientated than before and I used this to my full advantage. I dodged to the left as he swung his fist and pushed Naruto out of the way as the older boy began to blindly lash out at everyone around him. I knew I had to end this fight soon for both the sake of my opponent and for the safety of the surrounding crowd.

It would seem that we had regretfully gathered the attention of the surrounding students and a chant of 'fight, fight' had broken out. I dodged another blind punch and looked around for the teachers. The chunin who were on duty were slowly making their way over to the crowd but seemed in no hurry to break up our fight. It would be easier for one of us to be knocked out first rather than having to completely break up the brawl. Great. I knew he out matched me as I had never actually had any experience in a real fight -unless you counted Hinata, and she obviously never gave it her all. In hand to hand combat he'd beat me no question.

I knew what I had to do if I wanted to remain conscious for the rest of the day but was apprehensive to do so. I had only ever studied up on the pressure points of the human body and theory didn't always work in practice. But it was my only choice.

So here's how it went: the first time I tried to get behind him I misjudged his speed and was too slow to react. This resulted in me getting hit in the face.

He was surely aiming for my nose in return for me breaking his, but his aim wasn't quite accurate and he ended up punching me in the eye. My vision blurred and I was knocked back, but not off of my feet. I hissed at the pain and shook my head to rid it of the shock. In the brief moment of victory my opponent lost his concentration slightly, obviously believing me to be out of the fight with such a hard hit, and he straightened with a wicked grin.

I used this split second of inattention to deliver my final blow. The pressure point in the neck was the most affective and easily reachable in my position -minus kicking him really, really hard in the genitals. So I launched myself at my opponent and silently pushed my index and my middle finger into his neck. He collapsed like a tonne of bricks.

I stood over his body panting and felt the adrenalin running through my blood. The crowd was silent, and then suddenly they were cheering and whistling. I got a few pats on the back but ignored them in favour of catching my breath.

"Alright everyone back to your lunches. There's nothing to see here," one of the Chunin instructors announced to the group of gathered children. The crowd began to disperse and the teachers approached me and the bleeding boy on the floor. As the excitement from the fight left me I began to feel the pain in my eye more intensely. I blinked a few times but this just caused a sharp pain to shot through my head.

"Mother fu-" I began to say but received a clip around the ears for my effort. I looked up and saw a disapproving look of one of the teachers. The other had the young boy in his arms and was obviously carrying him to the school medic.

"It was a good fight, but let's not ruin it with foul language. Not many first years can say they took on another student in the year above on their first day," the chunin smiled at me with a raised eyebrow. He then patted me on the head and chuckled. "You seem to be able to sort out yourself and your injury's aren't life threatening. Just don't pick any more fights today."

When the chunin had left I looked around. The only person in the near vicinity was Naruto as it seemed that everyone else had lost interest very quickly and returned to their games. Even the group of boys who had started the fight were now off playing ninja in the far corner of the courtyard. Talk about attention span of a teaspoon.

I looked over to the little blond boy and found a look of complete devotion spread across his face and directed at me.

"You know," I said offhandedly as I began to walk away from him and poked my eye gently a few times to assess the damage. "When I judged the odds of that fight I counted you in there as well." I sounded exasperated to the point of near exhaustion, and yet all the irritation from earlier seemed to have vanished and I now felt ready for anything.

"I... I mean…" Naruto didn't know what to say. He looked lost.

"What _I_ mean is that you better not expect me to fight any of your battles for you. That was because they threw a stone at my head. You're big enough and ugly enough to sort yourself out," I said in a disinterested voice. When I glanced at Naruto he had a smile on his face and a hand on his head as he ruffled his own hair.

"Of course," Naruto laughed. We had come to an understanding; I was happy to be his friend despite what people said and he wouldn't rely on me for help and guidance. He needed to figure all that stuff out on his own if he was ever to become Konoha's number one most unpredictable ninja. We spent the rest of lunch sitting at the back of the school as I clutched my aching head and half listened to Naruto's ramblings. It was nice.

!

People avoided picking on Naruto after that fight. It seemed by the end of the day rumours were heading around the school, getting more and more outlandish and ridiculous. One was that I had killed the boy who had given me the black eye; another was that the teacher had to take me away kicking and screaming as I tried to claw off his face. I fuelled these rumours, of course, making myself seem out of my mind crazy. Not surprisingly I very quickly earned myself a reputation to simply be left alone, and by extension Naruto. This suited me very well.

After class Hinata and I met Neji at the front of the school to walk home together. When he spotted me his look darkened and he stormed towards us angrily. When he was close enough he grabbed my chin painfully and moved my head into a better position to scrutinize my injury. He wasn't happy.

"When I said that you would not get bullied that wasn't a challenge to go and find someone to fulfil that role! What were you thinking?" he snarled at me, still gripping my chin tightly and inspecting my eye.

"I don't suppose the excuse he started it would work here?" I mumbled; my cheeks lightly coloured pink at his scolding.

"No, it would not." He dropped his hand and narrowed his eyes disapprovingly. "You look terrible."

I grinned, reached up and slung my arm around Neji's shoulder. "You should see the other guy."

"I have no doubt," he muttered more to himself than to me.

"Ahh, so you've heard the rumours?" I gave him a wicked smile and began to tell him the actual story.

While I talked Hinata stayed quiet, with her head down and her complexion pale. When I had first walked into the classroom at the end of lunch Hinata had run up to me in excitement and told me in a hurried voice that she was now friends with Shino. Her smile, however, quickly faded when she saw my very shiny black eye. She muttered and stumbled over her words, frantic and shaking in worry for me. It was clear she blamed herself for ever leaving my side. I reassured her that I really didn't mind and that it was just one of those things. She didn't seem to see it that way.

Later when we got home Hinata and I went to the dojo to do our daily practice and spar while Neji went off to start some homework of sorts. Hinata was much more reluctant to fight me than usual and I managed to knock her down a number of times that evening. When we both lay exhausted on the floor at the end of our session, Hizashi came in. We stood up immediately and bowed low to our clan leader.

At first he addressed Hinata, asking about her day at the academy and her observations of the other clan heirs. My cousin gave her answer with stutters, looking down in shame every time she stumbled over a word.

"But you made a friend," I injected quietly. Hizashi pretended he hadn't heard me but Hinata nodded enthusiastically at my words.

"Aburame Shino. He is my friend," Hinata smiled up at her father shyly, and I watched sadly as all Hizashi could manage was a stiff nod. Hinata's eyes glistened with tears, but she was used to such responses from her father and effectively held onto an emotionless mask. Hizashi dismissed Hinata and then turned to me, eyeing my bruised face critically. I pursed my lips and blinked a few times but continued staring straight ahead as if I didn't notice my father's scrutiny.

He then, in a very emotionless voice, asked "What happened?"

I couldn't help it; I smiled impishly. I looked down at my feet and tried to supress a giggle. "I, err… got into a fight."

He signed in obvious frustration, "Did you win?"

I allowed myself to full out grin and looked up at my father. He was humouring me, I could tell, but he hid it very well. "Of course," I said with mock outrage that he would even ask such a question.

He coughed lightly to hide his amusement. "Good," he said in a very straight forward, all business voice, and with that he walked away.

!

I found out soon enough that fighting was actually a very common thing on the school playground. For that week I managed to avoid getting involved in anymore and people just tended to leave me alone.

I also found that I had two little followers. Naruto and Hinata practically refused to leave my side, and in addition to this I thought it prudent to invite Shino into our little circle of friends. He gave a curt nod and it became the four of us. All the time.

It turned out that Hinata, given the right stimulation, could very easily become a normal five year old child with all the energy and immaturity that came with it. It seemed that I was not the only one that found the clan compound suppressing and dull.

Naruto, unsurprisingly, got bored with my company pretty quickly as I refused to do much more than sit and read in my free time. I tended to read anything I could get my hands on; whether that was local fairy tales or clan history or even this one particularly dull book on the anatomy of river trout. I just liked to read and although I didn't take in half of what I was looking at as I still hadn't completely got the hang of written Japanese I was convinced that all the information was sitting somewhere in my psyche. Not only this but I had found that people are much less likely to approach you if you look like you are intensely involved in a book.

I have to admit; I was being slightly anti-social. But being stuck as an adult in a child's body got very old very fast as soon as school had started.

When Naruto got bored of annoying me he would go and play with Hinata and Shino. Shino was reluctant to play with Naruto due to the blond haired boy's abrasive personality and slightly inconsiderate attitude. This also caused Hinata to be shy and nervous around Naruto and I had my suspicions that this was also the beginning's of Hinata's diehard crush.

Either way not my problem and I just ignored them in favour of peace and quiet. I did feel slightly out of place and felt like I needed to find some friends that didn't mind my overly careless attitude.

Around midweek was when I made friends with Ino. She wasn't to be my best friend, but at least I felt less anti-social.

I was sitting very quietly at a table at the back of the classroom. Naruto had been in trouble and so the usual place he seemed to have claimed next to mine was vacant, and Hinata and Shino were sitting together on the other side of the room. So I was all alone; that was until a blond little girl came and occupied it. She looked at me, very seriously, and studied my appearance. It was the break before last lesson and I really didn't care enough to ask her what she wanted; so I waited for her to speak.

"You should wear your hair up," Ino said in a bossy voice.

"Oh, no I'm alright. I don't like it up," I told her off the top of my head.

"Oh," she looked disappointed, not sure what to make of her rejected advice. I could tell she meant well in her guidance and felt bad for being dishonest. "Well, why not?"

"I don't like my neck." It wasn't a lie per say, as in all honesty I wore it down so that no one could see my neck as I guess you could say I was self-conscious of it. Yeah I know I was clutching at straws, but I didn't like the idea of lying to this very sincere little girl.

"Well wear it half up half down then. Here," and she reached over the table and took my white ribbon from my wrist.

"Hey!" I called in surprise, but she ignored my exclamation in favour of my shiny, black locks. I was interested with what she would do and so let her play with my hair but was prepared to snatch it back from her should she venture to lift up my hair and reveal my curse mark. Luckily that wasn't what she had in mind. Instead she grabbed the top half and put it into an improvised bunch. I still had my bangs framing my face, but this way my hair felt lighter.

When she was done I glanced at my reflection in the window and felt a small smile grace my lips. I didn't realize that there was something missing, but whatever Ino had done it seemed to have found its way back. Somehow having my hair up again, even partly, made me feel better. It was funny how hair could be such a defining feature for a person but sometimes it could make all the difference in the world. I felt like me again.

"Wow…" I whispered to myself. I grinned widely and looked at her in appreciation. "Your right, it does look better! Thanks Ino." She sat there looking smug and so was unprepared when I launched myself at her and lifted her in a big bear hug.

She yelled in surprise but it quickly turned to a laugh when she realized what I was doing. "You're welcome," she giggled happily. That was the start of a very nice friendship, but Ino was far too popular and me far too indifferent and eccentric for us to be best friends. Besides, I didn't want to take Ino away from the little pink haired girl in the corner who kept getting picked on about her forehead.

But if I was going to be really honest; it was a pretty big forehead.

At the end of the week I approached Iruka-sensei wearily. Naruto's loneliness problem needed to be nipped in the bud sooner rather than later and, although I had already figured out that Naruto needed to be shunned by the village in his childhood for him to turn into the awesome shinobi he would one day become, that didn't mean he couldn't have a little bit of love from a caring source.

Also I just couldn't stand the idea that I was Naruto's best friend in the world. Because, lets be honest, I just wanted to sit and read during school hours. Not really the ideal friend for Naruto to have as he needed constant stimulation, and it seemed that no matter how often I told him to shut up he just couldn't take the hint. Ever.

"Iruka-sensei?" I asked quietly in a shy, reserved voice. We were now alone in the room as I had waited for everyone to leave and told Hinata that I would be out in five minutes.

"Yes Nanami?" he looked up from his paper with a questioning expression. When he spotted my fading black-eye he frowned and looked at me with understanding. "Yes, I heard about your antics on the first day. I was advised not to address you about the issue but I'm glad that you have come and seem me on your own accord. The boy in question has been talked to and he won't antagonise you again. I am to congratulate you on winning the fight but would advise you not to start anymore. If you want to talk about anything I'm always here to help." He seemed pleased with his answer and went back to work. I almost laughed. The academy's view on bullying was; if you get bullied then that means you're not strong enough so get stronger and bully them back. Nice idea, but I felt very sorry for those at the bottom of the social food chain.

"Err… Iruka-sensei?" I muttered again as I allowed nervousness into my voice.

"Yes, what is it? Was there something else?" He put down his pen and studied me intensely with a very serious expression. Had I actually been a young child I probably would have squeaked and ran away from the intimidating look. As it was I pretended I didn't notice.

"Well, you see, I'm really worried-" I started but was cut off immediately.

"I told you-"

"About Naruto," I finished in barely a whisper. Iruka gave me a strange look.

"What about Naruto?" He was hesitant now, I could tell.

"Well… the boy that punched me he, well the reason he punched me was because… because-I-was-sticking-up-for-Naruto!" I closed my eyes and flinched, as if to say such a thing was the most horrible thing on the planet. Okay so I was playing him like a piano but I needed this issue sorted out sooner rather than later. Naruto was so annoying and I would eventually end up punching him. When I opened my eyes again I saw Iruka-sensei looking off into the distance with a pale face and a gaping mouth.

I continued on, hoping to catch him out in his moment of unease. "It's just; I know that people don't like Naruto. He is really annoying and he doesn't have any friends but he's not that bad that someone should want to hit him" –unless you spent a lot of time with the boy and you just wanted some peace and quiet- "and it was an unfair fight because there were only two of us and there were a lot of them and-" breath "-I didn't know who to turn to because Naruto is obviously unhappy but no one can see that and it's not fair because he doesn't have any parents and lives alone and I just don't know what to do because-" He cut me off with a hand held in front of him.

"That enough, I see your point. I will talk to Naruto and see what can be done," he said distractedly, with a concerned and guilty look on his face.

My work was done.

**So I never actually originally planned for Naruto to be involved in this story much at all, but somehow he just found himself in here. I reckoned that if Nana and Naruto ever crossed paths Nana would probably want to be his friend and help him on some level. Don't worry it's not going to be a big plot thing! I'm trying to avoid the OC coming in and saving Naruto from a crap childhood thing. Nanami's a big realist if you haven't already found out! So the first week of the academy; I hope you enjoyed my take on it! **

**Thank you again and I apologise for any grammatical errors that were not spotted! Let me know what you think!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter Four

!

"_Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life."― Mark Twain_

!

The weekend following my first week at the academy I decided that I was going to have a go at being a child.

After training in the morning on the Saturday we had free time for the rest of the day and so I went and joined in with some kids on the street who were playing ninja. I asked Neji if he wanted to come but he didn't even dignify me with an answer and instead I received a pinch on the arm for asking stupid questions. The kids on the street were more than happy to let me join in, as most had already forgotten about the fight at the beginning of the week, and those that remembered just thought it was cool. It turned out that it was actually quite a fun game and before I knew it I was running through the street and hiding in waste bins.

I didn't have Hinata and Naruto on my tail for once as Hinata had been invited over Shino's that afternoon and Naruto was with the Hokage. So I was free! Okay, maybe a bit of an exaggeration, but not having little shadows was a huge relief. I noticed that a few of my class mates were also involved with the game such as Choji and Shikamaru, but I didn't interact with them as the game involved a lot of running and hiding away from the other players.

I managed to avoid getting caught apart from once, however, when I helped Choji hide up a tree with me. He was on my team and there was no danger in lending him a hand. Unfortunately he wasn't very subtle and managed to fallout of the tree and we got caught. He tried to apologise to me as we sat on the dirt tied up but I just waved him off. Metaphorically, of course.

"It really doesn't matter Choji it's just a game," I tried to reassure him. "How's your backside? It looked like it was a heavy landing?"

Choji blushed bright red and stuttered that it was fine.

"I'm Nana by the way."

"I'm Choji. It's nice to meet you," he said politely but hesitantly.

"Yes it's nice to meet you to, but it would have been more preferable to have met under more comfortable circumstances," I mused out loud. "Especially in a position where I could feel my legs." The boys who had tied us up obviously didn't know what they were doing and my blood circulation was paying the price.

Choji giggled at my comment and I grinned.

Later on, when I heard the snide remarks made about Choji behind his back about that fact that he was making us lose, I was angry and defended the little boy. I told them to leave him be because he had as much right to play as everybody else did, and they immediately shut up. Having a violent reputation was good fun.

Eventually I decided to call it a day. I wanted to find somewhere quiet to sit and read for the rest of the afternoon. So I waited until everyone regrouped again and let them know that I would no longer be involved. They let me go without fuss as with my leaving the teams would be even. Before I left I went and said goodbye to Choji and told him I would see him around school, and he waved goodbye to me happily enough. I was itching to open the book on shogi strategy I had found in the clan library and so was over the moon when I discovered a little hidey-hole against the back of a ramen stand. So I sat down and crossed my legs and rested my book on my lap.

It was private and quiet and I lost myself reading for a good half an hour. That was until the ramen stand owner saw me and chased me off shouting and mumbling about "dammed kids and their messing with my ramen." So I went to look for another place to just chill out. However, such places within a Ninja village apparently are more difficult to find than one would expect due to ninja paranoia and therefore their hate of anywhere that an enemy could hide in the shadows.

This resulted in me attempting to walk and read, and failing miserably. I walked into quite a few people and bashed my head against a sign post within the first 10 minutes. It wasn't long after this, in the middle of one of these wonderings, that I heard my name being called. However, at exactly that same moment I bashed straight into a wall, dropped my book and fell to the floor in a daze.

"Oh wow, are you alright?" asked a kind voice from above me.

"She really shouldn't have been walking with a book in her face," said another voice. I felt to pairs of arms reach under my armpits and pull me to a standing position. They then guided me to a seat and I promptly fell onto a bench as soon as I was able.

I shook my head a few times and looked up to thank my saviours and came face to face with Choji. "Oh hey," I said with a smile.

"Hey yourself," said the boy standing next to Choji. Shikamaru frowned at me with a raised eyebrow and then said, in a very bored voice, "You're sitting in my seat."

I looked down to the left and right nodding. "And a very nice seat it is to." I grinned up to the Nara genius and the boy sighed in frustration. He went round me and sat down on my right; then lay down and ignored me in favour of the clouds. _Fair enough._

"Here's your book Nana," Choji injected, sparing a glance at the irritated Shikamaru and handing me my book.

"Thanks Choji," I smiled at the Akamichi and he blushed and mumbled in embarrassment.

"Choji?" asked a deep voice next to me. I looked to my left and marvelled at the fact that Akamichi Choza had been sitting there for probably the whole time and I hadn't noticed. I was going to blame that one on the head injury.

"Oh, dad, this is Nana. She's from the…" Choji drifted off and looked at me with uncertainty.

"I'm from the Hyuuga clan," I finished for Choji. "You are, of course, Akamichi Choza. It is an honour sir." I bowed my head in exactly the way I was supposed to, and then looked up to see the amused look of the Akamichi clan head.

"Yes, I know who you are," he said smiling. "It is also nice to meet you." He then turned back to the bag of potato chips in his hand and pretended to be extremely interested in them, probably to give his son some privacy with his friends.

"You're Nara Shikamaru aren't you?" I asked, turning to the boy in question.

"Yeah I am," he mumbled drearily; obviously not concerned enough to build up effort for the conversation.

"Well, it's nice to meet you too!" I said with as much energy as I could muster. He flinched back at the excitement and gave a small unsure nod in return. I just winked at him in amusement, but he didn't seem to find funny.

"Why aren't you playing ninja anymore?" I asked Choji once I had finished antagonising the Nara. He was pretty fun to wind up. I moved up to give Choji some room so he could sit between Shikamaru and me.

"Oh well, they didn't want me to play anymore. They said I was too slow," murmured the little boy in shame as he took the offered seat.

"Well that wasn't nice of them," I said airily, flicking through my book absentmindedly. "I won't be playing with them again if there that unnecessarily horrible." I spared a glance at Choji and he had a small smile and another light blush across his cheeks.

"Shikamaru and I were just sitting watching clouds. You're welcome to join us if you want somewhere to read your book. It doesn't matter if you don't want to." The little boy looked down shyly and I grinned in returned.

"Thanks guys!" I said making myself comfortable and opening up my book. Choji shared his last bag of potato chips with us and we three sat together happily. When Choji's father left he invited Shikamaru and I to dinner, to which Shikamaru accepted and I said that I would have to ask at home and that if they said yes then I would love to. Choza waved at us goodbye and the rest of the afternoon was spent in companionable silence. It was nice to find young children who didn't have to run around all the time.

When the sun was beginning to set I told the two boys that I would run home and ask about dinner, but they insisted on accompanying me. So we set off in the direction of the Hyuuga clan compound talking about pointless things and the different shaped clouds the boys had spotted that afternoon.

"What were you reading?" Shikamaru asked with interest. I took out the book and handed it to the boy.

"It's about shogi strategy," I explained. "See, I'm actually not too bad at the game but I haven't got the attention span to keep playing for longer than 10 minutes. So I thought if I learnt some strategies then I could keep up my interest." Shikamaru grunted in interest and handed me back the book.

"I wouldn't mind having a look at that when you're done," he said offhandedly, but I could tell he was actually really interested. I laughed at his attempt at a careless attitude and gave him a little push, causing him to stumble over his own feet.

"Hey what was that for?" questioned the now angry Nara.

"What was what for?" I asked innocently. In response Shikamaru pushed me back and I stumbled into Choji who caught my fall effortlessly.

"What goes around comes around," said Shikamaru in a matter of fact voice but with a small smirk on his face.

"You know, for a genius, that was a pretty dumb move." My grin turned feral and the Nara's expression dropped instantly.

"What a drag," he muttered to himself and before I knew it he was running away from me as fast as he could.

I laughed and shouted after him, "much more intelligent move!" Then grabbed Choji's hand and dragged him after Shikamaru. _Dam, when that boy wants to he really can really run._

We made it to my clan compound in record time and the boys waited outside as I went to find someone to tell where I would be and make sure that there were no problems with it. As it happened, Hizashi was the first person I saw, and before I could run the other way and fine someone less intense and intimidating to ask, he spotted me.

"Nanami?" he demanded and I turned around and gave a bow.

"Hyuuga-sama," I said as I came up from the bow. The official title immediately told him I was up to something.

"What are you doing? Why are you not at supper?" Hizashi took in my dusty appearance and I could practically feel the disapproval radiating off of him.

"I have been invited to have dinner with the Akamichi clan. There wouldn't be any problem in my attendance, would there?" I looked up at him with doe like eyes. The man in front of me, although he pretended different, was still my father and despite the fact that he had become much more harsh and severe in the last few years I still knew his pressure point. Just like when I was younger, if I tried hard and used the proper etiquette and decorum, I could get him to give me almost anything I wanted.

There was a pause. "I will get Neji to collect you after your meal," he conceded, giving me an expectant look.

"Thank you Hyuuga-sama," I said, grinning happily and giving another bow. Then, before he could change his mind, I sprinted in the other direction back to the main gate.

We ate and talked the whole evening. Choji's parents were lovely people and I envied the lack of formality and the freedom that their clan had. The food was fantastic and Choji's mother sent us away with bento boxes full of sweets and goodies. The whole thing was great fun and it was most certainly the beginning of a long and beautiful friendship.

!

The start of the next week was a breath of fresh air. First I realized Iruka must have had a talk with Naruto because I started to notice the dynamics of their relationship slowly change. It was still a student teacher relationship but Naruto showed more respect and didn't feel the need to constantly prank him. Not only that but when Iruka shouted at Naruto it was almost fondly. No prizes for guessing who the class favourite was. This was great and it meant zoning out in class was much easier as I didn't have Naruto next to me making loud noises for attention.

In fact, I had banned him from sitting next to me at all and asked, no demanded, that Shikamaru and Choji take his place. They were quiet and I would get the occasional pleasure of Shikamaru's dry humour or even, if I was really lucky, Choji would offer me a potato chip. I noticed that he only ever gave chips to his closest friend and felt privileged to be considered such.

We three just fit together nicely. We would spend most of our free time in each other's presence; usually in a relaxed silence as each of us fulfilled our favourite past times of eating, reading and sleeping. Once in a while we would go and play a game or do something overly childish, but these were only when either Choji got bored or I was in the mood to antagonise Shikamaru. Like I said; he was extremely fun to wind up. It was a bit of a challenge at first as he was incredibly laid back, but if you sat there prodding him with a stick for half an hour when he was trying to sleep you could get the most amusing reactions. Choji disapproved, being the kind person he was, but even he couldn't hide the laugh as he watched Shikamaru attempt to throw things at me as I ran away screaming dramatically.

We spent lunch times under the oak tree in the corner of the courtyard. Choji's mother would usually pack enough food for all three of us to share and so we would have lunch together and it would be easy and comfortable. I didn't think that life within the shinobi world could be so easy. I had just assumed that everything would be stoic and violent, with expectations and boundaries. My times with Shikamaru and Choji were stress-free and I was content with my two new best friends.

Don't worry I wasn't abandoning Naruto in favour of less energetic friends because it seemed Naruto had found a new playmate - and one obviously just as unwilling. The day that Naruto met Sasuke was the most relaxing school day I ever had. From that day on during lunchtimes Naruto was too busy challenging Sasuke to fights to take the time and effort to come and find me. We did remain friends, of course, and when Naruto needed someone to judge the fight, or simply needed backup, he would drag me from where I was chilling out with Shikamaru and Choji and force me to help him.

I didn't mind though, as it was only once in a while, and if I really didn't want to go I could always kick up a really big fuss and Naruto would scamper. It seemed as if he continued to very vividly remember the fight from the first day. With Naruto drifting from me to bigger and better things, or rather more competitive and proactive occupations, I saw Hinata start to drift as well. Like I said, she really was just a little girl at heart and had Shino as a friend who seemed more than happy to play with her. They fit together rather nicely. So everyone was happy.

So this routine continued on for the remainder of the year. My sixth birthday came and went in a blur and nothing much changed for me; apart from the fact that I now had friends and not just relatives to share the day with me. Shikamaru and I would frequently visit the Akimichi clan compound at weekends and Choji's parents were more than happy to accommodate us as we were such good friends of Choji. I never brought the boys back to the Hyuuga compound with me though as I knew that neither of them would appreciate the stuffy atmosphere that always seemed to hang around the place. We did, however, sometimes find ourselves at the Nara compound and it was in one of these instances that I met Nara Shikaku.

We were sitting in Shikamaru's back garden and somehow the Nara heir had coerced me into playing shogi. After three games of me losing Shikamaru tried to get Choji to join my team and give me a fighting chance, but he was adamant about being neutral.

"What do you mean neutral? It's not like two against one would make much difference," I argued sceptically, "we would lose no matter what."

"Well, you'll definitely lose with a mind-set like that," said a voice from behind me. We all glanced up to see the Nara clan head standing over us and observing the game.

"Shikamaru, although keeps winning, is still having to try hard to think through your strategies. It's the hardest I've ever seen him work to win against someone of his own age. You should be proud." The Nara clan head looked at me with interest and then took a seat between Shikamaru and me, facing the centre of the board.

Shikaku watched our game until the end and when Shikamaru won for the fourth time that day he nodded very gently. "Both of you have strategic minds. Shikamaru in a sense that; he knows how to counteract any move put in front of him, but he doesn't yet have the talent to predict the moves before they are set into motion. You however, Nanami, know instinctively what the persons next move will be, but you don't know how to counteract that move effectively." I nodded to Shikaku wide-eyed and eager.

"You would make a good team in a battle," Shikamaru's father nodded to himself, "but I have a feeling that Nanami has a different fate in store for her." Shikaku looked at me from the corner of his eye and I looked down awkwardly. Arranged marriage; this was certainly the thought that was passing through his mind in that instance. However I also got the feeling that he was talking about something else as well. "Sit and work together to try and beat me," instructed the older Nara.

I moved and sat next to my friend and we played a very long and intense game of shogi. Shikaku came out victorious, but both Shikamaru and I were elated at the idea of how well we had done against the Nara clan head; a certified genius.

Every time after that when we came to the Nara compound Shikaku would sit with us and give us lessons on strategy. It would be Shikamaru and I verse his father and his father would win every time without fail. But I did learn the power of positive thought in a battle and that if you really believed you would win then the chances of you actually winning increased ten folds. The competitions also created a strong comradeship between Shikamaru and I as we worked together and began to see how each other's minds worked. I would be able to predict Shikaku's next move and Shikamaru would know how to counter it. We asked Choji to get involved but he refused as he didn't like competition.

I realized that this world had begun to change me. Before, in my previous life and at the beginning of this life, I had hated being competitive and would rather avoid the whole thing. However I had come to realize that being competitive would give me drive and I began to see the joy in winning, and in reverse losing left a bitter taste in my mouth. It was tiny compared to most people's behaviour and I could still lose easily without caring much, but it was a big change in my eyes.

For some reason that thought scared me and I hoped beyond hope that I didn't completely lose myself on my way to becoming a ninja.

!

It was in the last week of the academy year that I got into my second fight.

It was during the instances where Naruto successfully managed to remove me from my place under the oak tree. Through my friendship with Naruto I had also got to know Uchiha Sasuke.

My first impression of him; _what an arsehole. _The impressions following the first one; _still an arsehole. _He obviously enjoyed Naruto's company and found his antics amusing but hell if he was going to admit that to anyone.

"You're never going to beat me. So give up," Sasuke had sneered at Naruto after he had, for the hundredth time that week, beat him in a spar.

"You just wait!" Naruto shouted from his position on the floor as he cradled his bruised knee. "One day I'll be the greatest Ninja in the village. You'll see!"

"I'm an Uchiha and because of that I will always be a better shinobi than you," Sasuke said with his nose in the air and chest puffed out in pride.

"Thank you for sharing your superiority complex with us Sasuke," I remarked dryly from my position against the wall, observing the two boys in amusement.

"What do you know?" he scoffed right back.

"Just because you're from a great clan, doesn't mean you're going to be great," I mumbled with disinterest, taking out a book of fables Shikamaru had leant me and flicking through it absentmindedly.

"Come say that to my face!" shouted the now irate boy.

"Oh dear, I seemed to have wounded the little Uchiha's pride. Whatever will I do?" The sarcasm was lost on him, and my dead expression seemed to make him just that little bit more angry. This might not have been the wisest thing in the world to say I admit. But hindsight is an amazing thing.

Sasuke charged and I dodged. From there it just got out of hand. I ended up with a dislocated shoulder and he ended with a broken nose. It was the second time of me breaking someone's nose; it seemed that I had quite a good left hock. This time, however, there was hell to pay. Turns out when two clan children start a fight in the school playground and it results in serious injuries (i.e broken bones) then the family has to be informed. So at the end of the day Sasuke and I sat outside Iruka's office after being patched up and healed by the school nurse, and waited for a clan member to come and collect us. Lucky for us neither Hizashi nor Fugaku thought it important enough to come and collect us themselves, or rather unlucky I suppose considering who turned up instead.

Sasuke and I were sitting there in silence, waiting, when Uchiha Itachi walked around the corner of the corridor. Had I not been drilled by my clan for years on end about how to keep a straight face then I probably have spluttered in surprise. I didn't, however, and just watched blankly as the two Uchiha boys interacted. For Itachi was still just a boy. He was ten years old and actually quite small for his age.

My first thought was that this was the very same boy that would one day destroy his whole clan minus one. He looked gaunt and tired and I felt uneasiness at being in his presences. Yet that changed as soon as I watched him look at his brother and witnessed his eyes begin to sparkle with mirth. When I saw this look I realized that this wasn't the same boy who had murdered his family, and that I couldn't judge him on the atrocities that he had yet to commit.

"So you lost in a fight did you?" said the smooth voice of the elder Uchiha. I coughed in amusement and directed my face away from the brothers so they couldn't see my smirk. No point damaging Sasuke pride further for the sake of cruelty.

"No!" Sasuke cried in defence. "I won hands down."

I scoffed at what he said and turned to address the boastful boy. "Oh please. You practically ran away crying when I broke your nose," I told him in a matter of fact tone.

"Well you didn't seem as if you were going to do anymore fighting with that dislocated shoulder," Sasuke sneered.

"You're right," I admitted and the little boy looked smug at being proved right. But I continued. "I admit that I was about to throw the fight, because it bloody hurt. However, you ran away first. Therefore, I won." I grinned at the little boy who seemed just about ready to start another fight, but before he could pounce he was prodded three times in the forehead.

"Admit defeat," said his brother simply, obviously highly amused at our bickering.

Neji turned up moments after that with a scowl and gave me a pinch on the arm for good measure.

"Will you stop pinching me!" I cried out as he did it for a second time.

"Will you stop getting into fights?" he said in return.

I gave a shrug. "Probably not," I answered honestly, with a cheeky grin. "He started it." I pointed at Sasuke accusingly and he just glared in response.

"It was your fault!" he shouted again.

"You know," drawled the older Uchiha, cutting off his younger brother's complaining. "It's said that at your age when a boy and a girl fight, it's supposed to mean that they like each other."

Sasuke and I looked up to the older boy with blank expressions before it took time to process what he said. Itachi just studied his nails with a bored air and pretended we weren't there. I reacted first, as Sasuke just seemed to be in a state of shock. I snorted in an extremely unattractive fashion and then burst out laughing, keeling over and holding my stomach. I just couldn't stop; the idea was hilarious.

"Come on," Neji mumbled, obviously amused but refusing to show it. He grabbed the shoulder that hadn't been dislocated and dragged me away from the Uchiha brothers.

Before we were out of sight I called back to Sasuke, who had gone tomato red at what his brother had said. "Bye Sasuke-kun! I'll miss you! I hope you'll consider going on a date with-" I couldn't even finish the sentence, I was crying with laughter too much.

"Shut up!" shouted the little boy, embarrassed beyond belief. Itachi just looked highly amused by the whole situation.

!

The following Sunday afternoon, after the fight with Sasuke, my father and I settled down for our weekly game.

"Do not get into any more fights," Hizashi instructed over a game of shogi.

"I don't go looking for these fights you know." I was at the turning point of the game where I had been doing brilliantly, but from here it was about to go all downhill. My lessons with Shikaku had helped me greatly with my attention span but I still had a long way to go. I moved my piece carefully but as soon as I placed it down I knew that I had made the wrong move.

"You will never be a great fighter. Good, but not great," Hizashi said emotionlessly.

"Gee, thanks," I muttered in a sarcastic voice with a pout. My father glanced at me sharply and so I sat a little straighter and put my pleasantly interested face on. "How do you know?" I questioned innocently.

"Because women of this clan are never great fighters." I felt self-righteous indignation rise within me at his words.

"Well that's hardly fair," I said between gritted teeth. Yeah, you guessed it; my father was a misogynist. Hardly surprising though coming from such a stuck up clan. "There are surely acceptations."

"Yes," Hizashi said indifferently, and then his tone softened and a ghost of a smile graced his lips. "Hanabi will be a great fighter." Hanabi was the light in Hizashi's eyes. Although still a toddler she was already being taught clan techniques and I would bet anything that he was grooming her to one day take Hizashi's place as head of the clan. I knew that nobody would blame Hizashi for his choice for it was clear already that Hanabi was a better candidate than the quiet, kind Hinata.

"Okay so Hanabi is set for life. What about the rest of the women in the clan? It is surely not simply their duty to become wives and birth children?" the bitterness in my voice was clear and Hizashi raised an eyebrow in question. "We are already slaves to the clan. Must we be slaves to our gender as well?" I explained, and Hizashi's eyes darkened at my subtle mention of my own curse-mark.

"Women of the clan have other qualities that make them good shinobi," Hizashi continued, "or, sometimes in reverse, not good shinobi."

"What do you mean?"

"Your cousin, Hinata, is an example of her qualities as a person being poorly suited for a kunoichi life style."

"She is too kind," I finished for him. We sat in silence for a few moments, working at the game in front of us. "And what about me?"

"You may not play shogi very well, but you are very skilled at playing people, and at such a young age. This is not surprising, as the Hyuuga have always been skilled in the area of reading people's emotions and motivation. You have this skill." My mind blanched at the compliment. I didn't know what to say, so I just continued on with playing the board game. It was fruitless; Hizashi moved the last piece and I had lost the game just like that. "Although," he continued as he stood up, "you have greatly improved with your strategizing skill. But they are not yet good enough to beat me." Hizashi left after that and I sat their pondering his words.

!

**Shikamaru has finally come into the story! I know a lot of you wanted to see him so here he is. Now remember, he's still a child. So he's not completely the Shikamaru we know and love but he'll get there soon enough. Not only this but we just met Itachi for the first time; I hope I got the interaction between Sasuke and him right. Two of my favourite characters in the same chapter! Anyway, I hope you like the chapter and I look forward to your feedback! Thank you every single person who has reviewed, I have read each and every one of them and that I know even one person is enjoying the story makes me happy! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter Six

!

"_You live and learn. At any rate, you live." ― Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless_

!

The following year, my second year at the academy, I found myself turning seven. Along with this was the start of the use of chakra.

"Hey Shikamaru," I greeted my friend, sitting down next to the lazy Nara at the back of the room and taking out my school books. "Where's Choji?" I looked around and couldn't see the chubby boy anywhere and, thinking about it, I couldn't see the blond bundle of energy around either. I scratched my head in confusion. Hinata and Shino were at the other side of the room in quiet confidence with each other and Hinata gave me a gentle smile when I looked her way.

"He's off with his dad today. Clan something or other," mumbled the boy. Shikamaru laid his head on the desk and closed his eyes; ignoring me and probably pretending that I wasn't there. Shikamaru could be rude and standoffish at times but this dismissive personality was relaxing and I knew I could always count on my friend for a good laugh at his expense.

"What type of clan something?"

"It's chakra day idiot. His clan teach it themselves. Something about high-metabolism," muttered the boy into his arm and then continued to mumble about 'incessant babble' and 'trying to sleep here'. I ignored him in favour of a face palm.

How could I have forgotten? It also explained why Naruto wasn't in. If he somehow tapped into the Kyuubi's chakra on his first try and unleashed it upon the village then disaster would ensue. He was probably having private lessons with the Hokage and I was sure I would hear all about it when I next saw him.

"Alright, settle down everybody," Iruka-sensei said as he entered the room carrying mountains of books. He set the books on the table and addressed the room with excitement. "Today we are going to learn how to mould Chakra." An excited buzz went around the room at Iruka's words. Most of the students wouldn't have ever even thought about the idea of trying to use chakra before and this was a big step in any ninja career. It could make or break you.

Some people just didn't have the ability to control their chakra and these were usually people from civilian families. If this happened then they would usually leave the academy because a chakra-less ninja was as good as a dead ninja.

Unless, of course, they had special circumstances. An example would be Rock Lee. He was born with deformed chakra coils but with hard work and determination he persevered. Eventually he would only ever be able to do the simplest E-rank jutsu's that they taught at the academy, but that was enough to make him a genin and from there he would become a legend of taijutsu. Hopefully, anyway, if my existence in this universe hadn't messed things up too badly.

Sometimes, however, people from clans also couldn't use chakra. This was a very embarrassing situation for anyone but when it came to clan business it was dam right humiliating. I had heard stories of clans that disowned their children simply because they couldn't wield chakra.

The first half of the day was spent on the basics of chakra theory. I actually found this particular part fascinating and listened attentively. I think Shikamaru was slightly surprised at how much my usually short attention span was managing to keep up with all the complex diagrams. When lunch came around I was beyond excited to try out chakra for myself.

That afternoon we were led outside, much to Shikamaru's annoyance, and were seated on the grass under a tree on the far section of the training ground. We were instructed into a meditate pose and told to close our eyes. Iruka assured us that we didn't need to be paranoid about being in such a vulnerable position, because he was there to protect us. He really was adorable.

I couldn't help but contemplate whether or not it would be inappropriate to give him a hug.

Iruka's soothing voice could be heard above the wind as he guided us to find our chakra. "The funny thing about chakra is that you've have had it for the whole, entirety of your life. But until you make the conscious decision to reach inside yourself and pluck it out from the depths of your sub-conscious, then you will never be able to sense it. But once you do sense it then you can never lose it again. It is like a spot on your nose; you didn't realize it was there until someone pointed it out, but as soon as you're made aware of its existence, you can always feel its presence."

His analogy gained a few chuckled from the students around me. His soft voice continued, "Clear your mind so that there is only darkness. Then look deep into that darkness and try and find a source of light. When you see that light, you need to grab it and pull it towards you." He went silent and all that could be heard was the collective breathing of my class.

Inside my own mind I was in a pitch black mindscape searching for a spark of light, and rather unsuccessfully. I waited patiently and looked closely into the depths of my mind but still couldn't see anything no matter how hard I looked. However, after a while I began to feel something build up within me. It was powerful and comforting and I reached out for it on instinct alone. But when my hand reached the light it seemed to just pass through as if it was smoke, and I lost the powerful feeling instantly as if it was never there.

I tried again to look for that source of light. After a few moments I saw it, hanging in the darkness like a source of life. But when I attempted to keep hold of it the light dispersed and I found myself standing in a shower of gold sparkles. When the light was gone, it was gone, and I couldn't feel it anymore.

So I tried again.

I didn't know how long this went on for but soon enough I was broken out of my internal struggle by the whooping celebrations of Kiba.

"I did it! I found it," shouted Kiba.

Iruka-sensei congratulated the Inuzuka on his success and told him to be quite to let the others concentrate. Throughout the next few hours random bursts of celebration could be heard as a multiple of people found their chakra successfully. I just felt worse and worse.

By the end of the lesson I was thoroughly depressed and as we were led back to the classroom I couldn't help but drag my feet moodily. All the hours I had spent finding my chakra and then losing it was draining and frustrating. I wouldn't have been surprised if the people around me could feel the bitterness rolling off me in wave of annoyance.

"Well done class that was a productive lesson," cheered Iruka-sensei. "You are all dismissed for today. However, I would like to speak to anybody that did not managed to tap into their chakra. So could all of those students please stay behind?" The class proceeded to leave the class room and Shikamaru shot me an understanding glance as he passed. He was one of the first to contact his chakra.

"Hey, Nana," said the boy, giving my dejected look a sympathetic smile. "You coming to Choji's later?"

"Might do," I said ambiguously. "Depends if I'm still alive, and my clan hasn't offered me to the Gods in sacrifice." My sarcasm wasn't lost on the young genius and he smirked at my very bad tasting joke.

"I'll make sure to come wave you off," Shikamaru replied as he turned his back and left. I felt like throwing a shoe at him but that would involve getting up to fetch said shoe afterwards. It wasn't worth it. I waved off Hinata as she walk up to me and a shocked expression crossed her face. I gave her an impish smile and said I would meet with her and Neji after I had talked with Iruka-sensei.

There were about five students left in the room in the end; all of which looked mightily disheartened at the idea that they hadn't been successful. Unsurprisingly, I was the only clan kid. Iruka beckoned us to all sit on the front row as he leant back on his desk with his arms folded. He looked at us each in turn and then sighed unhappily.

"I'm really sorry but I'm going to have to be honest with you. Most students find their chakra within the first hour of looking for it. If you cannot find it within this time it probably means that you simply do not have high enough chakra reserves to ever become a shinobi." He was blunt and to the point, which I appreciated. I felt a small ball of anxiety start to grow within my stomach and I felt like crying but I held it in impassively like a good little Hyuuga.

"Is there no hope?" The question came from a little civilian boy who was so frail it looked like a weak gust would blow him away.

"The probability of getting in touch with your charka is so minimal it almost isn't worth it. If you haven't felt it yet, you probably never will. I'm sorry," muttered our teacher with true regret. The civilians dispersed with dreary steps but I remained where I was seated.

But I had felt it. I had been able to feel it and touch it, but I just couldn't sustain it. When the rest of the students left I turned to Iruka with a question.

"I'm sorry Nanami, but that include you," he said with deep sympathy.

I shook my head and explained to him what had happened in the darkness of my mind. He seemed shocked at what I had said.

"I've never heard of that happening before," Iruka muttered to himself disbelievingly. "Would you mind trying again for me? I will attempt to feel out your chakra for abnormalities while you do." The teacher looked worried, but at the same time a little excited at the prospect of my situation. How nice of him.

I did as he asked and closed my eyes. In my dark mindscape I searched out for the ever evasive ball of light. After a few minutes I saw it hovering mockingly, and was almost tempted to stick my tongue out at the little devil petulantly. Instead, though, I reached out and touched it. I felt the powerful rush of chakra but witnessed regretfully as it dispersed around me.

When I opened my eyes I saw Iruka looking at me with a calculating expression. "Well, there is no doubt that you have indeed come in contact with your chakra. But what is stopping you from grasping hold of it is a mystery to me." He looked down contemplatively. "Hopefully we will be able to overcome this issue," he said, looking up. "I will inform your family of this development. You are a promising student Nanami and it would be a shame if you could not become a Ninja."

I felt a tendril of fear run through me at the prospect of not being a shinobi. I had once upon a time entertained the idea of not becoming a ninja, but had quickly disregarded the idea. This was because, for one reason, my clan wouldn't allow it and, for another, the idea of being in such a dangerous world and not being able to appropriately protect myself was the scarier idea.

I didn't tell Neji about the situation on the way home and Hinata didn't bring it up either. I knew I would have to tell him eventually, but I was going to put it off for as long as possible.

!

I was called to my father's study that night.

"I was informed about your difficulty with chakra manipulation," he stated firmly and I nodded in reply. There was concern in his eyes - but whether this was for me or what it could mean for the clan was a mystery.

Before Hizashi could say another word there was a knock on the door and a tall, greying man entered. He glanced at me sharply before he turned to my father with a quick and purposeful bow.

"Hyuuga-sama," spoke the man with a rich, deep voice. Hiashi stood and manoeuvred around his desk. He gave a sharp bow in return to the man; specifically, no higher and no lower as a sign of equal respect.

"Mikata," Hiashi said; acknowledging the man in return, his voice neutral and without emotion. Silence fell over the room then and I stood awkwardly with my hands behind my back. I pursed my lips and glanced to the side, observing the man who had intruded in on our meeting. The two elder men stared each other down and neither even hardly moved to breath. As the tension grew I began to feel uncomfortable and thought that maybe I should leave the two men alone.

However, when I was about to voice my thoughts the tension was suddenly broken. "Hizashi," spoke the man gently with a smile. The breath I had taken caught in my throat and I coughed with unrestrained surprise. Hizashi, however, didn't even blink and all I could do was shake my head in disbelief and despair. I really couldn't be bothered with this fiasco after such a difficult and disappointing day.

Hizashi, witnessing my distress, explained the situation to me. "Mikata was the medic on my genin team and has been a close friend to me for many years." I was first taken aback by the idea that Hizashi had friends.

I know that this was a ridiculous thought but his life seemed to simply revolve around the Hyuuga clan and not only this but all his friends from before the kidnapping would now think him dead. This man must have been pretty special to have Hizashi's unwavering trust with the greatest secret in the Hyuuga clan.

Mikata simply chuckled under his breath good-naturedly and the tension in the air seemed to ease. Mikata turned to me and looked me up and down as if I was a very interesting specimen. I had to restrain myself from glaring back at the old man. "This is your daughter I take it?" he asked Hizashi as if I wasn't even in the room.

"Yes," he simply stated in return.

"And you believe her to have deformed chakra coils?" He grabbed my chin without warning and when I tried to flinch away he just held on tighter. His eyes bore into mine and he squinted hard as if he was looking for something.

Deformed chakra coils? This was a new development that very much involved me. I glanced at my father in a way that told him I was not happy about being left in the dark about something so crucial.

"Yes," was all Hizashi's reply again. There was obviously something going on here that I was missing but the easiest option was to just go along with it and save any questions for later. I had the feeling that this man, like Hizashi, was the type of person to want to get on with a task and avoid pleasantries at all costs.

"Sit child," instructed the elder man gravely; letting go of my chin. He sat on the floor in a lotus position and gestured for me to do the same opposite him. I glanced at my father unsure but he just nodded very lightly to me and so I did what Mikata had asked. "I will have to feel for the girl's chakra with my medical ninjutsu," he explained both for Hizashi's benefit and mine.

With this Mikata leant forward and placed a glowing green hand on top of my forehead. His eyes slid shut and I dared not move in case I broke his concentration. I felt a light feeling start to glide through my body and I shivered involuntary at the sensation. The chakra didn't even waver for a second and continued to probe.

After what felt like a life time of waiting he pulled back and observed me critically once again. "Your superstitions were correct, my friend," spoke the old medic-nin. Hizashi had remained standing throughout and at this news he moved back round his desk and sat down gracefully; hands in front of him and a calculating look in his eye.

Mikata stood and I followed his lead. I swallowed thickly at the situation and a ball of worry formed within my stomach.

"How bad is it?" asked my father stiffly.

"She will be able to manipulate chakra but she will never be able to gather enough to produce any substantial ninjutsu," said the medic in a matter of fact voice. "Pass the academy test, yes. But nothing more."

Hizashi gave a curt nod at Mikata and glanced at me with a surveying look. I looked down and frowned at my feet. Never be able to produced ninjutsu? That wasn't fair. For the first time since entering the room I spoke.

"Why?" My voice sounded concerned and curious but all in all I wasn't overly bothered by the news. Can't miss what you never had, right?

"It because you're Chakra coils have been, what us medic-nin's call, 'burned-out'," said Mikata clinically. "When you were a very small child, maybe one or two, your body and your chakra were still forming together. My guess would be that something disrupted this process and caused the link between your mind and chakra to break. This link was reformed as you grew but is now narrower and with more resistance that most people. This will allow you to have excellent chakra-control, so much so that I would have suggested you become a medical-ninja. However, the resistance is so high that you cannot gather enough chakra within yourself to produce something as powerful as medical-ninjutsu." Mikata finished with a thoughtful look and a faraway expression.

"And so she will be purely taijutsu dependent?" Hizashi asked thoughtfully, and with a small trace of worry.

"Not necessarily," said the medic. "Genjutsu requires very little chakra, and a lot of chakra control. If she is intelligent enough then genjutsu would probably be her best option."

It is said that it is mostly very smart people that can become genjutsu masters because they need quick thought processing to produce illusionary images. I knew my own limits and felt disappointment rise within me. I would work hard at genjutsu, but I knew that I would not be able to become a master. I wasn't smart enough and that wasn't simply false modesty on my part.

"Any particular event which could have stimulated this… deformation?" I asked almost reluctantly. I had an idea about what it might have been but wanted some semblance of confirmation.

The medic hummed thoughtfully at my question. "Yes, that is what is troubling me. I would say that it would have to have been a spiritual change within you brought on by an external factor. I could guess and say that it was the Kyuubi attack, but you were too young for it to permanently affect your chakra coils. The chances of this whole situation happening at all anyway are slim to none. But there you go."

A spiritual change would explain it. I could barely remember the moment I had arrived within this world, but knew it hadn't been pain free. My mind had screamed out at the memory backlash. Not only this but I remembered the flash of absolute clarity with my chakra, allowing me to _see_ without actually _seeing_ everything around me. Then it had just disappeared and I had barely thought about it until that moment. For some reason the arrival of my memories meant a premature change within my spiritual chakra. And now I had deformed chakra coils just like Lee. This sucked.

Hizashi hummed and then turned to address me. "Nanami, you will have to work very hard to accomplish your goals because of this disability. I have every confidence that you will succeed." The praise did little to make me feel better but I acknowledged it all the same. Extra work was not fun. "I will inform the academy of this development. You are dismissed." He waved me off and I left with a bow to both Mikata and my father.

When I made it to my room I opened the door and found my brother sitting on my bed and poking through the book I had been reading that day. When he heard me come in he looked up and set the book down slowly. I just stood in the entrance of my room with my arms folded and my lips pursed.

I knew Neji wouldn't break the silence so I started. "Hinata told you."

"Yes… Why didn't you tell me?" His tone would be blank to anyone else but I heard a whisper of hurt hiding underneath. In his eyes all we had was each other and that I didn't tell him something so key would understandably make him upset.

"Because..." my throat felt dry all of a sudden, "I didn't want you to be disappointed in me. I don't want to be written off just yet." I smiled weakly at my brother but averted my eyes when he just looked back at me blankly. We stayed in silence for a few more moments before Neji moved off the bed and walked towards me.

"I wouldn't think you would be such an easy character to write off," he said without emotion. "You have been with Hiashi-sama?" There was an edge to Neji's voice that could be heard every time he mentioned our uncle. My heart would always clench painfully at the fact that I couldn't reach out and take the bitterness away by telling him the truth and yet by this point I had become almost accustomed to the feeling.

"I was," I said reluctantly. I was beating around the bush; not something I ever usually did but this was a delicate situation. I went on and described to Neji what the situation with my chakra was. Unsurprisingly my brother just remained quiet the whole time.

When I was done and my head was bowed in defeat Neji did something very unexpected. He reached and tilted my chin upwards and studied my face seriously. "So I was right," he said nodding to himself. "You really aren't such an easy character to write off. You will still be a force to be reckoned with." A ghost of a smile washed over me and the look in Neji's eyes softened.

On pure instinct and affection alone, before Neji could step away and retreat to his own room, I flung my arms around his neck and gave him the biggest hug my tiny child frame could manage. He was used to my antics by now and so just simply patted me awkwardly on the back in return. Neji didn't do hugs.

I went to bed feeling better about the situation after the chat with my brother. I wouldn't let such a trivial matter stop me. So what if I couldn't do ninjutsu? There were plenty of shinobi out there with similar problems. I would overcome the issue just like them.

!

At school the next day everybody was buzzing and ready to start to use chakra with an actual jutsu. However, it was not to be. We were given mountains of theory work to complete and I couldn't help but bash my head repetitively on the desk.

By lunch we were all dragging our feet out of the classroom into the cool air outside. Choji, Shikamaru and I went to find a nice secluded spot on the field. About five minutes into break Naruto found us, dragging a complaining Sasuke with him, and so we were subjected to their constant bickering as well as already having a deflated brain from that morning's hard work.

"Man, this is such a drag," Shikamaru complained as he rested his head against the back of a tree. "So, Nana… " Shikamaru perked up suddenly as if he was remembering something interesting but then seemed to retreat slightly; giving me a cautious look. "What happened with you then?"

I explained to the three boys, just like I had with Neji the night before, about my deformation. Choji and Naruto had sympathetic ears and Naruto began to explain his own problems with chakra. Sasuke just pretended the trees were more interesting than what Naruto had to say, but not very effectively as anyone with half a brain could tell he was interested in the blond's story.

Naruto said that his problem was opposite to mine; instead of only managing a tiny amount of chakra to control he had a vast ocean of it. The Hokage said to him that chakra control for him would be like trying to use a bucket to fill a thimble of water. Doable but difficult.

As Naruto talked Shikamaru stayed quiet and observed me with half lidded eyes. When it got to a stage where all I could feel was Shikamaru's stares I snapped.

"Oi, Shikamaru, quit it," I complained, interrupting Choji in mid sentence. Shikamaru's eyes, however, didn't move from studying me and so I approached the young Nara and gave him a hard tap on the forehead. Something in my actions in that moment felt reminiscent of someone else and it gave me a cold feeling in my stomach, but then the thought was so fleeting that it was forgotten seconds later. The boy squirmed and complained at the agitation but I just gave him a dry look.

"What?" he asked grumpily.

"Why were you looking at me like that? What are you planning?" Shikamaru had the look on his face that usually ended in him being right and me regretting ever asking. But dammit, if I wasn't a curious person I don't know who was.

"Well…" drawled the boy, "I was just thinking of your chakra. That possibly, because of this lack of connection between your mind and your chakra, you would be immune to genjutsu."

My mind blanched at the idea. Well that was a theory and a half.

"But wait, that doesn't make sense. That would mean that anyone who can't get in contact with their chakra would be immune to genjutsu and we know that's not possible," scoffed Sasuke, unimpressed.

Shikamaru just shook his head. "No, you see unless you have damaged chakra coils then you are connected to your chakra. Just because you have the inability to find it doesn't mean you aren't connected to it. Nana's a special case in that her mind and her chakra are held together by threads, when it should be rope." I nodded at Shikamaru analogy, loving, not for the first time, that I had a genius as a friend.

Suddenly a thought occurred to me, and a wicked grin spread across my face.

"Boys?" I questioned mischievously. I got one very excited looked from Naruto as he noted the gleam in my eyes, and three groans from the others as they realized that I was going to drag them into whatever plan I had. "Anybody want to place their bets?"

Sasuke and Naruto bet that I would still be influenced by genjutsu. Naruto said this because he didn't really know what was going on and Sasuke said this due to his superiority complex about the ability of the sharingan and its genjutsu – to him no one could escape his clan's doujutsu.

Whereas Shikamaru, Choji and I reckoned that I would be immune. Shikamaru agreed because it was his theory, I agreed because I thought it would be cool if it were true, and Choji agreed because he had been friends with Shikamaru long enough to know that betting against him was almost certainly a losing bet.

Sasuke and Naruto didn't know this, and I would have felt bad about conning them if I wasn't so unsure myself. It was a crazy thought, but I had had my fair share of crazy situations to last me a lifetime and so I couldn't in all good conscience judge the relatively thought-out theory.

It was a free for all and the winning side got to choose the losing sides forfeit. A very risky move - but if we won I was counting on the amusement factor to be worth it.

!

So, learning to use chakra? My conviction was real and stubborn but the practicalities of it were difficult. It was harder than I expected.

I sat on the grass on the grounds of the Hyuuga estate underneath the shade of a Sakura tree peacefully. I had my eyes closed and my breathing was deep. I searched inside myself for that spark of chakra and felt it flare. But as soon as I had a conscious grip upon the mystical feeling I felt it slipping away from me like a hazy dream. Following that it was as if I were dead. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I stood up and started stamping on the ground like a child throwing a tantrum.

It. Wouldn't. Work.

"What are you doing?" said an annoying voice from behind me.

"I'm practicing. What does it look like?" I snapped back at the person; collecting myself with as much dignity as I could and returning to my lotus position and my failure of meditation

"It feel like you're sending out a homing beckon," Neji droned, ignoring my obvious dismissal. Dropping my futile attempt at chakra manipulation I turned around and glared at my brother.

"Piss off," I hissed in his direction. I had been at it for the last four hours straight; turning down a meal at the Akimichi's for the fruitless practice. "I do not need you, in all you're self-superiority, to tell me that I'm bad. I know." I turned my back on him, crossed my arms, and sulked.

And he chuckled.

"That's it!" I shouted. I needed someone to take my frustration out on and he was the unlucky reciprocate. I was about ready to launch myself at him, head first and teeth bared, when I received a sharp pinch on the side of my arm.

"Ow," I yelled, my anger dispelling in favour of nursing my bruise limb. Said culprit did not apologise but instead sat down opposite me and mirrored my position.

"Let us work together," he said gently but firmly. It was not a question; it was more of an order.

Every day following this event, after school for an hour, I would sit with Neji underneath the Sakura tree and meditate. I had at first instructed Neji to go and do something more constructive with his time, other than helping me. But he insisted that helping me with chakra control and manipulation was more important. He argued that if I was going to die then my whole existence would be counter-productive, and that he simply could not let that happen. I think what he meant to say was that I was his sister and that he loved me and would help me get better because of that. But Neji had trouble expressing himself and so I would take what I could get.

The more and more I did this the longer and longer I seemed to be able to hold onto my chakra and contain it for a period of time. Finally, by the time I turned 8 years old, I had a break through. I had discovered that my chakra could only be manipulated through a practically pinprick hole within my coils and that this was where I was gaining my chakra from. It was not that I didn't have the chakra, but that I couldn't get to it easily enough. Over the previous year I had worked and worked at collecting and holding onto the chakra for as long as I could, but eventually when I stopped the meditation all the chakra would just go.

One day, however, during meditation when I had gathered a substantial amount of chakra within my mindscape, instead of disappearing when I let it go like it usually did, it had remained. The chakra continued to pour through the pinprick into my consciousness so I could manipulate it at will. I could finally feel my chakra!

Iruka-sensei hadn't been lying when he said that once you found it then you would always have it. It just took a bit longer for me to grasp it; like a bar of soap in a bath. I had been ecstatic for the rest of the day following that. I could tell Neji was proud of my progress and hard work, but I knew he was also relieved that he wouldn't have to meditate with me any longer.

!

It wasn't long after my success with Neji that I finally got to find out who had won the bet about whether or not I could use genjutsu. It had been over a year ago but none of us had forgotten it.

We had begun work on the replacement jutsu and half the class had already managed it once or twice, including Sasuke and Choji. I was struggling to build up enough chakra to achieve desired results and just kept popping back in and out of existence in the same place. But the fact that I could achieve anything made me over the moon.

Naruto had a similar problem to me, but his determination to never give up gave me the hope that I could achieve the impossible. He really was a special kid. Shikamaru hadn't achieved it either but that was simply because he wasn't putting any effort in.

Anyway, so one morning we were being introduced to genjutsu and were learning how to recognise and dispel them. It was full of theory work and tedious hand seals. Later on, after lunch, Iruka unexpectedly put a genjutsu on the class. He gave no prior warning or sign that it had even happened. It wasn't until other people in the class started to call out at the visions they were seeing did I realize what had happened. I felt a little tingle in the back of my mind, but apart from that nothing.

It didn't take me long to figure out what had happen and so I sat there dumb struck and a little impressed at Shikamaru's prediction. I was immune to genjutsu. It was very cool, and just a little bit disturbing.

After class I had gone and informed Iruka-sensei of that fact that I hadn't seen the genjutsu. Naruto and Sasuke had demanded proof when I had told them the news and so I had a little audience behind me as I spoke to our sensei. Iruka, as well, wanted to make sure what I said was true, and so placed another one on me. I waited for a moment and felt the strange little tingling sensation, but again nothing.

I looked up expectantly to my teacher and all I got in return was a face full of shock. With this I also heard two loud moans and a grin stretched across my face, from ear to ear.

I swung round and stared at the two miserable boys with open glee. This would be fun.

!

**Thank you for reading! I am over the moon about how many of you enjoyed Itachi's introduction in the previous chapter, and if you liked that then you're going to love the next chapter that I have planned for you. My heart melted a bit at Neji in this chapter, I have to admit, and you're going to see more of that next chapter. Don't worry he's not going to at all turn OOC but we will get to see inside his head a little bit more. I hope you're excited to see what the forfeit for the bet is going to be! **

**So please tell me what you think, I absolutely love all of your feedback and suggestions! I especially love to hear your theories! Sorry for any grammatical errors, but I hope you can overcome them and enjoy the story anyway. Thanks!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 7

"_I thought about how there are two types of secrets: the kind you want to keep in, and the kind you don't dare to let out." ― Ally Carter, Don't Judge a Girl by Her Cover_

It was a Sunday afternoon and I was eight years old when I was informed that the contracts of my arranged marriage had been signed.

Not only this but it was in blood and could not be taken back under even the most tenuous conditions. Neither party would be informed of the others identity until they had both come of age at 18 years old - in my eyes, that was awfully young to be getting married. The way my father had told me the news was cold and unsympathetic. I felt tears rise in my eyes but I pushed them back down. I didn't want to give them my tears as well as my future.

"It is your duty to your clan," said my father with a serious voice. I felt like pulling a Mulan on him and telling him that 'I also had a duty to my heart', but I knew he wouldn't appreciate it. I had known for a while that my father and the clan elders would eventually pick someone for me to be wed to in holy matrimony, but until the moment he told me it was confirmed I had been in denial about the whole situation. My 18th birthday was a long way off but I knew that it would come around sooner than I wanted it to.

I didn't wait for Hizashi to dismiss me but instead stormed out of his office in a fit of rage. I had hardly reached the end of the corridor before the anger had left me and I could no longer keep up the energy to feel righteous indignation at the situation. All that was left was bitterness.

That day I wanted to get out of the compound and get away from all the responsibilities that came with it. I knew that I needed to inform Neji about the arranged marriage as soon as possible.

I didn't want to tell him about it at all, but Hizashi suggested that it might be a sensible thing to do so that he could get his head around the idea. I didn't want to do anything that _that man_ had suggested; I felt betrayed, even though I knew the situation to be inevitable. But I also knew my father was right; Neji needed to know.

I pushed my feelings down into the deep recesses of my mind and collected up my usual cheery disposition. With a mischievous smile on my face I went searching for Neji and managed to convince him to go exploring with me that day. Or rather, I told him that I would go by myself and that if he didn't want me to get into even more trouble then the wisest option was to go with me. Shikamaru had told me that his father had once taken him to the top of the Hokage monument and that although the walk was 'a drag' the view was pretty amazing. So I reckoned this would be the perfect place to tell him. Peaceful and private.

Neji begrudging followed me and after an hour or so searching we found our way up onto the monument. We sat together on the head of the second Hokage in companionable silence looking out onto the village.

"What a lovely view," I said taking in a deep breath and humming in contentment. When Neji remained silent I glanced over to him and saw a dark look on his face. "What's up?"

Neji and I were not as close as we once were, but I was still probably the only person in the world that truly knew the boy sitting next to me. He was still hurting and held much resentment and that meant he was unwilling to open up; even to myself. Asking him if he was alright was not a simple question in the least.

"Uchiha Itachi," mumbled Neji. I froze for a moment – I really didn't know what to say to that apart from _What the hell?_ I don't know why but in that moment I had the strangest feeling that Neji was going to tell me he was gay. Not that, in all honesty, I would be _that_ surprised but it would still be a bit of a shock.

"That's random. What about him?" I shook the astonishment from my mind and moved back to reality. It really was a stressful day.

"He has it all." Neji turned his head away from me and I sighed sadly at my brother.

"I don't think so," I said, looking up as a crow flew overhead and watching it as it landed on his nest, hidden in the eye of the third Hokage. "What brought this on?" I asked curiously.

"Hinata informed me that there is to be an event at the Uchiha compound. Something about clan relations." Shikamaru had mentioned the event a few days before to me and I had been looking forward to having a look inside the walls of the Uchiha clan's home. They weren't as closely guarded as the Hyuuga clan but it wasn't such a place that you could just leisurely stroll through. Neji continued, "Uchiha Itachi has everything. He is clan heir, he is a genius and his family is whole."

"You do not envy him for these reasons alone though." I knew my brother and could see what he was clearly trying to say.

"He is free," Neji spat the words bitterly. As he said this he leaned forward and rested his head upon his hand regretfully. I understood what he was saying; Itachi was the embodiment of everything that Neji yearned for in life. But he was wrong.

"He is more constricted than even you," I muttered sadly.

"How do you mean?" My brother glanced at me with an emotionless mask; even now he was trying to hide his true distress, but I could see clearly in his eyes how conflicted he really was.

"Do you believe you are more influenced by others expectations of you or your own expectations of yourself?" I asked him rhetorically. "You believe in fate and therefore you follow the path you believe you must follow, whether it goes against what you really want is irrelevant. We are lucky in that our clan is at peace. Whose side would you pick if it was between your clan and your village?"

I looked to Neji and he seemed lost for an answer. "You believe this is the path of Uchiha Itachi?" he finally asked.

"Mere guess work," I mumbled, "but the boy is clearly stressed and everybody is aware of the political pressures the Uchiha are facing." I looked towards the face of the first Hokage and thought of all the stories I knew of his from my past life.

Neji's face darkened considerably and he watched the crow take flight with envy. "Maybe the Hyuuga situation is worse, though. The caged bird seal doesn't allow me to exercise that right. Is it true loyalty I have or is it forced me upon because of the seal?"

"Do you remember father's last words to us?" I asked seemingly off the top of my head.

Neji drew in a shaky breath and recited them to me perfectly. "Follow your duty children; for it is not a curse but a privilege."

I turned to my brother and smiled, resting a hand upon his shoulder. "They can make you act for good of the clan but unless you are loyal within your heart of hearts then there is no truth in your actions. At the end of the day, you can still exercise your free will. You still have a choice of mind." My voice sounded sure and direct, as if I was someone who had never had their choices taken away from them.

"What is choice of mind when you cannot exercise it. One should be judged by their actions - and I have no choice in mine," Neji said bowing his head in defeat.

"You always have a choice," I said with as much conviction as I could muster. I could hear the lie in my own words, and I'm sure that Neji could as well.

"You can see things that no one else can, Nana," Neji said, turning back to me and giving me a surprisingly gentle look. "Sometimes, I think you see more than even I do." He no longer looked bitter but instead looked longingly up into the sky. "I'm glad you were born without the byakugan. You have the freedom to do what you wish. You are not a caged bird. But that also means you cannot understand."

Perhaps Hizashi was right and that Neji would have to find his own path (or get the sense knocked into him by Naruto). No matter what I said he was determined to hold onto his bitterness. Either way I knew I could not help him and so reluctantly made the decision within my mind to just try and stand by him if he needed me.

We sat on top of the monument without speaking and watched as the sun began to set and the colours of pink, orange and red danced across the sky. Neji seemed relaxed and lost in thought but I could feel the pressure I was creating in the air rise and rise until it was going to burst. I needed to tell him soon otherwise I would chicken out. I had already been avoiding the inevitable. Neji seemed to sense the tenseness finally and turned to me in question.

"Nanami, what-?"

"I've-got-an-arranged-marriage," I blurted out as quickly as I could. I then placed a hand over my mouth, as if I couldn't believe what I had just said, and turned my face up to the sky with a dumbstruck look.

Dam, maybe I wasn't taking this as well as I thought.

"An… arranged… marriage," Neji said the words as if testing them on his tongue, "I don't understand?" He seemed confused beyond belief and I sympathized with him. I lowered my eyes to look at my brother and let my hands drop into my lap.

"Because I don't have the Byakugan, and therefore there is less chance that I'll pass the gene onto any children I have, I am allowed to marry outside of the clan," I said with a scratchy throat brought on by my apprehension.

"Yes, I understand that," said the Hyuuga genius though suddenly gritted teeth. He balled his hands into tight fists with the whites of his knuckles clear as day. "But what I don't understand is why they think that it's acceptable to dictate your life!" Neji stood and turned to me with fiery eyes and an angry sneer. It wasn't directed at me but at the clan and their insufferable need to control. Yet Neji could not show this side of himself to the clan and so he showed it to me instead. Just like when father had "died" and there was no one else there to listen but me.

And just like back then it was not pleasant - but he needed an outlet. Hizashi was right; Neji needed to know about the marriage now so that, when it eventually came around, he could accept it.

"I do not mind," I muttered quietly, not quite managing to meet my brother's eyes.

"You are lying. I can tell," he sneered again. "Who is it?"

"I don't know. Neither me nor the other person will find out until we are both of age."

"You do not want this; so do not follow it!" It was all right for Neji to give his everything to the clan but I knew he couldn't bare the idea of me giving everything as well. In his eyes, they didn't deserve me.

"I have my own duty," I told him gently.

"One that you do not have to follow!" He threw his arms in the air in a rare fit of rage. He could only see the injustice in the situation and so all he could feel was his own hate.

"I have no choice," I said with a slightly raised voice.

"You always have a choice," he shouted, throwing my own words back in his face.

"Well then I choose to do the right thing!" I told him, getting to my feet and matching his volume with my own.

"I…" Neji seemed to be completely overcome with emotion and obviously unable to express it. He was my older brother and I knew he wanted to protect me; especially from the clan. But he felt as if he was failing miserably and I could see his ideals falling around him. He was closing himself to me. "Fine then," he said clearly and without emotion, and then turned to leave.

I had seen this reaction coming and before he could get out of my reach I jumped into the air and latched myself to his back. He seemed taken aback at first, but collected himself quickly. Instead of attempting to throw me off like I had thought he would do, he simply stopped in the middle of the path with his head bowed.

We stayed like that for a few minutes, neither one of us daring to move. I was the one to speak out first.

"It's not fair," I muttered into his shoulder; my arms wrapped around his neck tightly. "And I don't like it. But at the end of the day I will do what I must. This is not just about the Hyuuga clan, but about strengthening the bonds within our Hidden village." His back was still rigid and his stance strong, but I could feel his will faulting at my words. I was right, and he knew it.

"If there is a question of loyalty; I know where I stand." My last words seemed to hit home and he relaxed in defeat. I didn't let go but rested my head against his back, closing my eyes and heaving a sigh. "Can I have a ride home?" I asked tiredly, suddenly exhausted from the emotional outpour I had received from Neji.

My brother, broken from his thoughts, reached round and hooked his arms around my legs to boost me up. I tightened my grip to keep from falling and we set off down the path without saying a word.

I had a feeling in the back of my mind, as if something had changed that day; like in the dojo between the fight with Hizashi and Hiashi. I didn't know what and wouldn't for a while. But had I looked around I would have noticed a shadow lurking in the trees; one who had overheard the majority of the conversation. I might have notice something change in that persons eyes with interest and something akin to dread. I might have regretted revealing so much in a place so clearly public, where anyone could over hear.

But I didn't notice, and so I remained blissfully ignorant.

!

It was the night of the event at the Uchiha's compound. All of the clans within the boundaries of Konoha were present and active within the Uchiha districts walls. Yes, I mean district. The Hyuuga gets a compound and the Uchiha get a district. Well, putting aside the fact that the Uchiha clan have way to much land, it was a beautiful place. Not quite as elegant as the Hyuuga compound but it had a different type of regal sophistication about it that spoke of wealth – and that they took themselves way too seriously.

Neji and I went together and joined in the festivities. It was a carnival of sorts with different food stands and games to play; all supplied by different clans around the village which specialized in selected trades. The Akimichi were supplying the food, the Yamanaka had a flower stand, and, randomly enough, the Aburame had taken charge of goldfish scoping. Glancing over in the Aburame's direction I could see Hinata and Shino sitting together not too far away from the stand.

I let Neji choose what to do first, as I knew my plans with the boys didn't need to happen until later and the day was still young. Neji was not a child by any respect but that day I did see a flicker of fun and playfulness appear in his eyes every now and again.

We started at the music stands and went on from there. My favourite was the goldfish scoping and when I managed to catch one I almost did a little dance. That was until Neji pinched me on the arm and told me that I was being socially unacceptable. So instead of dancing I stuck my tongue out at him, to which he just pinched me again.

For the rest of the day I carried around the little plastic bag with my new fish Nemo in it. Neji thought the name was stupid.

Uchiha clan members were everywhere and the whole event was rather, unsurprisingly, well policed. Yet I couldn't help but notice the bags under the eyes of some of the elder members and the physical ticks that they gave off every now and then. But before I could speculate on what the significance of this might mean I got distracted and dragged my brother over to a new stool.

"Isn't that your friend's father?" asked my brother. I looked to where he was gesturing and saw Choza standing to the side of a food stand selling dango and in a deep conversation with a fellow clans men.

"Hello Achimichi-sama," I said, greeting Choji's father with a bow.

"Ahh Nanami! It is good to see you," said the cheerful clan leader. "And this must be your brother?" The man looked down at us with a smile while I nodded and introduced him to Neji. After the pleasantries were done with Choza reached over the dango stand and grabbed two sticks for Neji and me. We took the food with glee and thanked the man profusely.

"No trouble at all," Choza laughed merrily. "I suppose you are looking for your friends? Choji and Shikamaru left here hardly five minutes ago." The Akimichi monarch pointed us in the direction of the two boys and waved us off returning to the conversation with his relative. We ate our food and went searching for the boys.

Neji and I spotted the two of them standing at the edge of the road next to a line of trees that was hardly 100 yards from the edge of a huge lake. Sasuke was standing with them munching on some dumplings greedily. This meant that Sasuke didn't notice our approach and a wicked grin crossed my face as an idea came to mind. Neji gave me an apprehensive look as he knew what usually followed said expression would mean something unpleasant for whoever was on the receiving end. However, as long as it wasn't him, he wouldn't stop me.

"You look really nice today Sasuke-kun," I whispered into Sasuke's ear in an imitation of one of the young boys fan girls that had seemed to have already started to collect. The young Uchiha jumped sky high and scurried away from me as fast as he could; dropping the food he had been eating. When he saw it was me his eyes narrowed into angry slits and he pouted in an annoyed fashion. Choji was stifling a laugh and Shikamaru was coughing heavily with his head turned the other way. I wasn't so subtle and out right laughed at his reaction.

"You're way too easy to wind up Sasuke," I sniggered with a wink in his direction.

"Hey shut up!" yelled the young boy.

When my laughter died down I turned back to the boy with a question. "Did you get Naruto to come like we asked?" Sasuke didn't answer, he just folded his armed and looked down at his fallen food regretfully.

"Yeah, Naruto's here," answered the lazy Nara for the Uchiha. "…somewhere." Before any of us could even blink a big ball of orange came charging into our mists. Naruto had been given an orange coloured festival mask by Sasuke to hide who he really was, but anyone that knew the boy personally would easily be able to tell that it was the nine tail jinchuuriki. Naruto lifted up his mask, which was appropriately that of a fox, and gave us a cheeky grin smoothed in chocolate and god only knew what else.

"Speak of the devil and the devil will appear," I muttered softly to myself, assessing Naruto's food covered face with amusement. I walked up to the boy and pulled out the napkin that Choji's dad had given me earlier with the dango and presented it to the boy with a raised eyebrow. He took the mask off completely and, grabbing the napkin, began to clean himself up. In that moment I suddenly realized that Naruto didn't have a mum or a dad to mop up his face when it got messy, or bandage his knee when he fell over, or just in general look after him. Technically neither did Neji and I, but we had each other at least and I was a grown woman who was currently repeating childhood for the second time round.

"Are you even allowed to be here?" said a voice from behind me, breaking me from my thoughts. I had forgotten my brother was with me, and turned around to watch him giving Naruto a look of clear disapproval.

"No," said Naruto, with a big chest. "But I've got a bet to pull through with and Uzumaki Naruto never goes back on his word! Believe it." He stood with a thumbs up in Neji's face and a huge, convincing grin stretching from ear to ear. Neji simply pushed the hand out of the way and raised his eyebrow in exactly the same way I had just done. This seemed to throw Naruto off. "Wow, that's scary. You look just like Nana when you do that," he mumbled scratching his head, "are you guys related?"

There was a silence of pure disbelief at Naruto's denseness. Fortunately Sasuke had brought himself out of his sulk and hit Naruto round the head. This seemed to make Sasuke feel better but Naruto didn't understand why he had deserved it.

"He's my brother Naruto," I explained.

"Oh, you're called Naruto too?" the blond asked my brother, who looked at him with a dead expression.

"Neji," I correct.

"What's a Neji? Is it a new rude word?" Naruto asked excitedly.

"No, he's called Neji," I tried to reason.

"Oh, right, I get it!" Naruto said with a smile.

"Do you really?" I muttered darkly.

Neji, thank God, got us back onto the point at hand. "What bet?" he asked.

"Right, so you know I explained to you that I'm immune to genjutsu?" I confirmed and Neji nodded. "Well it was Shikamaru's theory but Naruto and Sasuke didn't believe him. So we made a bet ages ago and just recently we got it tested. Naruto and Sasuke obviously lost so today's the day Choji, Shikamaru and I are giving them their forfeit!" I explained with enthusiasm. Sasuke and Naruto looked like they had just eaten sour grapes at being reminded that they had lost. The two very competitive boys were the sorest losers I had ever met. I could have been gentle and saved their pride, but I knew it was more fun to push them to their limits.

Neji gave me a look that said he knew that whatever I had in mind was going to be unpleasant and he didn't want any part in it. So I gave him a get-out-of-jail-free card.

"Don't you have any of your own friends?" I remarked lightly. Neji, always the perfect Hyuuga, didn't even blink. Though I could have sworn I saw his eye twitch slightly.

"I know what you're trying to do Nana," he said blandly. He then glanced round at the faces of my friends and seemed to sigh lightly. "And it's working. I don't want any part in the trouble you are bound to cause." Neji turned on his heel and walked away.

"Aren't you going to try and convince me that whatever I'm about to do is stupid?" My voice carried to him amused. He was leaving quickly; smart move.

"Whether I am here to witness it or not will not stop it from being stupid," he stated, glancing back at us for only a moment, "My only request is that you don't drag me down with you." He rounded the corner and was gone.

"Fair request," I muttered to myself with a slight shrug. "Well, boys, Neji just signed your death warrant. He was probably the only chance of this not happening." I grinned wickedly and glanced at Shikamaru and Choji. Choji looked unsure but Shikamaru, I was surprised to see, looked positively excited at the idea – in other words he looked slightly less bored than usual.

About half an hour later two young boys could be seen running through Konoha's high street completely stark naked.

When we had announced the dare both boys had gone bright red and refused. I have to admit that it was a bit of a low blow, but I pulled out the 'back on your word' card for Naruto. He, of course, declared that he would go through with it and Sasuke, not wanting to be outdone by the 'blond idiot', went along with it as well.

So here we were hardly 10 minutes later, in Konoha's town centre, watching the two most competitive boys in existence run around in their birthday suits because we dared them to. Please, though, give us some credit. We weren't stupid enough to dare them to run through the festival with no clothes on because we knew that each and every one of us would probably die a very slow and painful death for thinking up the ridiculous stunt. So we decided to go to the town centre and with all the prestigious clans gathered together at the Uchiha district there was less of a chance of anyone of importance actually seeing the dare.

Of course civilians would see it happening, but very few of them ever actually got into contact with Konoha's elite shinobi so we were more or less safe. Theoretically.

The dare was only a half-mile race down the high street, but I was willing to bet that that felt a whole lot longer when you weren't wearing anything. I know what you are probably thinking; that I'm a bit weird for daring two young boys to do this. But, in actual fact, it was Shikamaru who came up with the idea.

I couldn't stop laughing at the scene before me. I was perched on a roof just off the end of the high street where the race would finish, and almost fell off once or twice because I was so hysterical. We weren't too cruel though as I had a change of clothes for both the boys so they could get dressed as quickly as possible when the race had ended. I had to hand it to them; they both really went for it. Neither tried to hid from the on lookers; both were just incredibly intent on their destination. There were quite a few shocked elderly women who screamed at the sight and men sitting at bars who went to take a shot of sake but missed as they spied the two boys running past.

The people's reactions were brilliant and I just wished I had a camera.

However, they were both two-thirds of the way down the street when I watched a certain silver haired jonin walk out of a bar just in front of the two boys. Neither of them seemed to think him significant and just by past him on both sides, not even glancing back to see his reaction. But I watched for a few more moments as his eyes widened and he blinked a few times in unrestrained shock. The man glanced down at the open book in his hand with a frown and closed it quickly and unforgivingly. He then, without hesitation, turned right back around and headed straight back into the bar.

At first I fangirled big time. I mean Kakashi! There was something about the man that was just… wow. When I had passed that milestone, I laughed. Hard. It was hilarious and I promised myself, should I ever become friends with the copy-nin, I would remind him of this occasion and reassure him he hadn't been hallucinating. Poor guy.

The boys finished their race without anything substantial happenings and ran as quickly as they could into the alley way on the other side of the road, where they could hide and wait for me to deliver their clothes. The whole thing had been priceless and I would have bet that the two boys wouldn't be forgetting the whole experience for a while. A residual chuckle escaped my lips as I jumped down and landed in the middle of the road. I clutched the clothes to my chest and headed for the alley; giggling to myself every now and then.

When I had rounded the corner into the alley -a 'congratulations' on the tip of the tongue for the unfortunate pair- something tumbled into me and brought me to the ground. Naruto, still undressed, looked at me with shock and went a very nice colour of crimson. Before I could blink he had jumped up and snatched his clothing from my grasp. He jumped into the shorts as quickly as humanly possible and then ran. Very, very fast.

"See you at school," shouted the blond over his shoulder and I was left standing there with a feeling as if I was missing something. That was until I turned around and saw what Naruto was running from.

Uchiha Itachi stood behind his brother with a very disapproving look on his face. It was very similar to the expression on Neji's face when he thought I was doing something socially unacceptable. Sasuke just stood facing me with his hands covering his private parts and his head bowed in embarrassment and shame. Looking back at the situation I feel really bad for my reaction, but I genuinely couldn't help it. The whole thing was just ridiculous.

So I laughed. Actually I didn't just laugh; I more bent over laughing hysterically at the hilarity of the situation. I had tears streaming down my face and I clutched my stomach as it began to hurt from the simple act of laughing and laughing and_ oh please stop its killing me._

After a few minutes of this I looked back up to the two brothers. Sasuke looked extremely mortified at my reaction and I took pity on the poor boy and threw him his clothes, which he very quickly got changed into. However, when I looked back over to the older Uchiha and saw, once again, how unamused he was at the situation… Well, I just cracked up laughing again. This time I clutched the wall and slid down it into a sitting position where I could safely cradle my stomach muscles as they mercilessly contracted.

"Sasuke?" question Itachi in a low voice.

"Yes nii-san?" Sasuke's voice was considerably higher than usual and squeaked slightly in fear.

"What were you doing?" I calmed down enough to look up and saw Itachi glance at me with a raised eyebrow. And… I lost it. A laughed escaped from my lips and tears returned to my eyes. I was breaching on hysterical at this point but it was so. Dam. Funny!

"Nana!" shouted Sasuke with a pout, "stop laughing!" This just made me laugh harder. I couldn't remember laughing like this ever before in this life and it felt good to just let it all go. I wasn't allowed to let myself go like this in the confines of the compound, but I didn't see what a problem about letting go here.

"Sasuke," spoke Itachi over my loud chuckles.

"I lost a bet," murmured the boy at his feet.

"Ahh… I should tell father about this," said the elder with a disinterested air.

"No!" Sasuke and I shouted at the same time. I stood up shakily and held onto the wall with an unsteady hand. Giggles still escaped from lips every now and again, but apart from that I sounded rather sane. Apart from the smirk I seemed to be unable to remove from my face.

"Please don't tell! That's not fair!" I argued, pushing off the wall and standing my ground.

"Oh?" asked Itachi without emotion. His bored expression would probably have intimidated most but I was very used to such reactions. I could see the amusement playing across his face - even if he thought it was hidden. "And why is it not fair?"

"Because…" I said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "it's not Sasuke's fault."

Itachi looked at me for a moment and then gave a perfectly logical reply, "Sasuke choose to run naked through the town. You didn't make him."

"But I dared him. You have met your little brother haven't you? He's not exactly going to say no," I said matter of fact. I ignored Sasuke's indigent protest at my mockery of him.

"True. So if it's not his fault then it must be yours," Itachi summarised in a blank tone.

"I suppose," I said confidently with a look that dared him to challenge me. I saw Sasuke face palm at my supposed idiocy. I was going with the theory that although this boy was technically ANBU he wouldn't actually do anything harmful to a little kid. He didn't react to this apart from with an amused expression which clearly mocked my attempt to stand up for myself. But behind his amusement I caught a glimmer of curiosity and he studied me as if I was an interesting piece of art work.

I found the whole situation rather funny but that amusement soon fled when I caught a flicker of red in the older boy's eyes, but it was gone before I could really even notice it. A sudden feeling of dejavu shot through me and I felt that I was forgetting something crucial. Seeing the flicker of sharingan had sobered my thoughts and I frowned in dismay. Before I could react however there was a commotion at the entrance to the ally and I turned to see Shikamaru and Choji enter. Both were talking animatedly but I couldn't find the will power to call out to them. When I glanced back to the two brothers I found Sasuke now standing alone with a sour look on his face.

"Dam, he will never let me live this down," muttered the boy, mostly to himself.

Following that I was more subdued. We all walked back to the festival together and were in time to see the fireworks and have a toffee apple each. But the weight of something important was pressing on my shoulder and I couldn't enjoy myself. Neji came and found me but didn't say a word. Sometimes, when it came to me, he liked to play the card 'ignorance is bliss'. I told him anyway and laughed at the same disapproving expression that cross Neji's face just like Itachi's.

Just before we left for the evening I caught sight of Sasuke helping a relative pack up their stool. I approached him warily and frowned as a feeling of uncertainty crept into my bones.

"Hey Sasuke," I said slowly. "About today…" I didn't have time to finish the sentence as his relative interrupted.

"And Sasuke, who might your little friend be?" asked the rather large lady politely. Sasuke looked at me blandly with a simple glare that blamed me for all his problems in his life. I just grinned back. Introductions were made between myself and his aunt and I smiled sweetly up at the cooing Uchiha.

"Aww, look at him. Talking to a girl. You're a big grown up nine year old now Sasuke, so you better be sensible," his aunt gave him a significant look and for the hundredth time that day Sasuke blushed brightly. But I wasn't paying attention to this because it felt as if a lead brick had made itself comfortable inside my belly.

From that moment on nothing else really mattered and I just went on automatic mode. Sasuke sensed my mood change but didn't question it as he was eager to see me go and for me to not mention that afternoon's little adventure within hearing distance of his relatives. Soon enough I said my goodbyes and walked back home in silence next to Neji. My brother kept glancing at me unsurely but I ventured no explanation and so he didn't ask.

When I got back home I went straight into my room and closed the door quietly and gently. However, I didn't climb into bed or go to change my clothes. Instead I headed for the floorboard under my dressing table and pulled out the old notebook. I hadn't looked at this since before school had started when I was five years old.

It wasn't that I had forgotten that I was once from a different world; it was just that it didn't directly affect me. I got lost in my second life; forgetting that I had foreknowledge. Or rather I hadn't forgotten; I had just tried not to remember.

I slipped to the page I had written about Sasuke and skimmed through the facts quickly. I soon found what I was looking for.

I closed my eyes in horror and realization. I had forgotten. I had completely and utterly forgotten about the Uchiha massacre. I knew… no I was positive, that the event took place when Sasuke was 8 and Itachi was 13.

Sasuke was currently 9; that was what his aunt had said.

That meant that, for some unknown reason, the Uchiha massacre hadn't taken place. I couldn't even fathom the idea that something had changed so radically that the massacre, one of the most significant events in the history of Konoha, hadn't taken place. And if my guess was correct I would say that it would never take place. The tensions between the Uchiha clan and the rest of the village had always been very high but going to the festival today I noticed that people seemed much more relaxed.

The festival, had the massacre have happened, obviously wouldn't have taken place. Therefore, for whatever reason the genocidal event was delayed, this meant that there was extra time for the Uchiha clan to mend its relationship with the rest of the village. It was a small change but it would seem that this could make all the difference. The straw that broke the camel's back, that caused Itachi to have to follow through with killing his entire family, _hadn't been placed_.

Apparently the outcome of the massacre was like a seesaw right up until the last moment; tipping either towards destruction or salvation. The only thing that changed was my presence in this universe and this meant that instead of tipping towards destruction it had tipped towards salvation.

I remembered something then from my previous life. The chaos theory. About the guy who founded it by rounding up one decimal place, a 1,000,000th of a number, and this resulted in a huge long term change. The domino effect. The butterfly effect.

One small change, like accidently standing on a butterfly which would have been eaten by a bird had it not been killed, stopping the bird from dying of hunger, which would have gotten a new strain of bird flu and then been eaten by a fox, who then attacked a young child, who caught the bird flu and gave it his family, who gave it to their village, who then gave it to the world and this one virus resulted in the extinction of the human race!

And because the butterfly had been killed the world didn't end. Okay, bit of an extreme and highly unlikely example, but you get the idea.

So I must have stood on a butterfly. No, more like I had stamped on it repetitively over and over to make sure it was definitely, very, extremely dead. And because of my mere existence and the tiny change it had made; it meant that the Uchiha massacre hadn't taken place.

The bloody Uchiha massacre; the catalyst that could be linked to just about everything that was going to go wrong in this world, hadn't happened.

Oh my God. What had I done?

**So, I loved writing this chapter because of all the situations the characters are placed in. I would love to hear what you think about Neji's thoughts, the Uchiha twist and also the dare the boys had to do! I'm sorry for any grammatical errors, please forgive me. Thank you for everyone who has reviewed my story; I read and appreciate every single one of them. When I see I have a review I get all excited and they always make me smile! So, until next time! :D**


	8. Chapter 8

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 8

!

_"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together." - Marilyn Monroe _

_"I like to call in sick to work at places where I've never held a job. Then when the manager tells me I don't work there, I tell them I'd like to. But not today, as I'm sick." -Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale_

!

So I freaked out about the massacre.

I hardly spoke to anyone for a few weeks, as I was scared of what I might change simply by saying good morning to someone. What would happen if Neji was suddenly killed by a rabid dog? Or Shikamaru hit his head and suddenly became really stupid? What if Choji decided he was going to lose weight!?

I couldn't handle the immense pressure that came with knowing exactly your effect on the world around you. I knew I had made a few changes before but knowing that the massacre didn't happen simply because of my existence was really difficult to try and get my head around.

Thank God, though, I managed to get over it pretty quickly. It was thanks to Shikamaru and his complete lack of caring about anything that made me see the bigger picture. It was shortly after my ninth birthday when Choji, Kiba, Shikamaru and Naruto made a runner from school. It was a scorching hot day where hardly anyone was paying attention; the five of us especially.

Shikamaru had his head on the desk and I kept pocking him with my pen every time Iruka-sensei said the word 'chakra'. Shikamaru, of course, had gotten the skill of completely ignoring me down to a tee. I would say that it was insulting, but it just made the challenge of winding him up that much more entertaining.

Choji was on Shikamaru's other side and obviously bored stiff. Naruto and Kiba were in the seats behind us flicking bits of rubber at the rest of the class; that is to say they were flicking rubber at Sasuke. Sasuke pretended that he didn't notice and tried to focus on the teacher as much as possible, but I could see a very slight vain popping on his forehead. Kiba had his little puppy sitting by his side, wagging its tail in merriment at the two boy's antics. As far as I understood nin-dogs aged much slower than normal dogs which would explain Akamaru's prolonged puppy-hood, but really it was just one of those things that I didn't question.

Soon enough I gave up on pocking the Nara as my heart wasn't really into the normally entertaining activity. The worry over changing the world was still heavy on my shoulders and I didn't want to irreversibly agitate the boy.

My lazy friend raised his head from the desk when I stopped prodding him and gave me a questioning look, surprised that I had given up so quickly. Funny thing was that when it came to working or strategizing I couldn't concentrate for more than 10 minutes, but give me the task of tormenting my fellow class mate and I could do it all day with no breaks. I just shrugged and put my head on my hand, avoiding eye contact and pretending to listen to the lecture. I knew I was acting weird to my normal self but I couldn't help but have this paralyzing fear that the world was going to end.

I tried to ignore Shikamaru's calculating look but after a full three minutes of constant staring I started to feel uncomfortable. I glanced back at the boy in question but looked away almost immediately. It was then that it seemed that Shikamaru made a decision. He nodded to himself and then leaned back in his seat to talk to the boys behind him. Naruto, Kiba and Shikamaru were deep in conversation and before long Choji joined in as well.

I'm not going to lie; I felt left out. But with the fate of the world hanging on the tip of my decisions, I decided to just stay out of whatever concoction they were brewing up.

It was five minutes later when Kiba put his hand up and asked to be excused to go to the toilet. As he passed me he glanced my way and gave me a smirk and a mischievous wink. Dread instantly filled my stomach. What did they have planned? I sat on my seat wringing my hands in curiosity; hardly able to contain myself. I managed to but barely. I tried my best not to look over to the other boys but failed miserably. When I snuck a glance I saw Shikamaru sitting there with a very satisfied smirk on his face. Choji looked concerned but Naruto looked positively ecstatic.

It wasn't until Kiba got back that I finally realized why. The boy walked into the classroom with his hands held in front of him, clasped together as if he were holding a small object he didn't want anyone to see. I suddenly became very uneasy as I watched the young Inuzuka walk up the aisle. As the boy got closer and closer to me an evil grin spread across his face and when he was hardly a few feet away from me he tripped.

What then proceeded to come flying out of his hands was a huge, black eight legged spider. So big in fact that you could clearly see the hairs on its legs and its multiple eyes.

And it landed right in front of me on my desk. I let out an ear splitting scream that people in the middle of snow-country could probably hear. The spider began to frantically scuttle around my desk and for some unknown reason came straight for me. I couldn't move fast enough and jumped out of my chair, overturning a number of tables and scattering all my work all over the floor. Even my beloved book for the day found its way mercilessly flying to the other side of the room, but I couldn't care less.

The spider had disappeared. I started to breathe deeply and tears welded up in my eyes and were soon streaming down my face. It is safe to say I hadn't cried for anything at all since the night of receiving the curse seal, but my one weakness in the whole entirety of the world was, yeah you've guessed it; Spiders. I didn't know where the thing was and I began to look around frantically; shaking slightly in fear. It was when I felt something small and tickly brush against my leg I completely lost it.

I screamed once more and made a dive for the open window on the other side of Shikamaru. I jumped on the desk and out the window before anyone could say Konohagukure and was gone with the wind, crying the whole way.

Now, there's something I haven't mentioned yet that I feel would be important to give as some background context to my obvious over reaction at this point, and also how my friends knew of my biggest weakness.

It was a few years ago on a rainy day when we were cooped up inside and had nothing to do. Choji and I were at Shikamaru's place, lounging around and wasting away the hours as only children can. We were playing Shoji, as always, when I had accidently placed my elbow on the edge of the board and the pieces were scattered everywhere. So we three went around a picked them up. One of the pieces, however, had rolled underneath a chest of draws and so I went to retrieve it. That was until I saw a little spider dangling from the corner of the cabinet.

Don't worry I didn't go berserk, but I did refuse to fetch the piece of Shoji board. Shikamaru resentfully moved to collect the piece but at the same time he also picked up the spider. I went and hid behind the Akimichi heir and all Shikamaru did was raise his eyebrow at my reaction. But the Nara heir wasn't one to preach about being 'the perfect Ninja' and not having fears, so he dropped it and never brought it up again. So I thought I had nothing to worry about. But one thing one must always take into consideration when dealing with a genius like Shikamaru is that he never, ever forgets anything. Ever.

After thoroughly ensuring that the spider was not on me and calming down considerably, I found myself wondering aimlessly through the streets of the hidden leaf village. I was slightly embarrassed by my over reaction but it was one of those things that you just couldn't help. Everyone had that one little thing and unfortunately mine consisted of hairy eight legged monsters.

I looked down and put my hands in my pockets in shame. A ninja shouldn't react like that to something so small. Actually, an adult shouldn't react so over the top to something so small, and even though the world considered me a child I knew better and was ashamed.

Not only this but the butterfly affect was still sitting mockingly in the back of my mind; judging my every little movement. So there I was wallowing in self-pity, not looking where I was going, when I went head first into someone else. I was knocked back onto the floor and landed painfully on my bottom. The person seem to hardly notice that I had just crashed into them and remained standing.

I looked up at said person with a hand on my head and a slight blush gracing my features. This just wasn't my day. The sun was obscuring the mans face but I could make out that he was tall, stocky and dressed in a heavy trench coat. I began to profusely apologize as I got to my feet and the only indication that the man even heard me was a slight inclination of the head. When I squinted up at the man I could make out a number of scars on his face and I found his eyes intensely staring back into mine. I didn't finch away from the man's eye contact but instead looked back at him with a politely interested air. Something in the back on my mind told me that I should recognise who this was.

"Hyuuga Nanami. Shouldn't you be in school?" questioned the man with amusement in a deep, rumbling voice.

"Yes," was my simple reply. "But due to unprecedented issues arising within the classroom I felt it prudent to remove myself from the situation. Do you mind if I ask who you are?" I tilted my head in childish curiosity. _I know who this is but…_

"Morino Ibiki," he stated._ Ahh..._ My insides squirmed at meeting the torture genius but I tried my hardest to feign polite interest. "By the look on your face I can tell that you know who I am."

_Looks like I didn't pull 'polite' off_, I thought sourly.

His face remained stoic but his eyes told a different story; he was laughing at me. I felt very small and childish so I looked down to my feet and pursed my lips. I didn't like being out done. But then again Ibiki was a master manipulator so it wasn't too bad being caught out by the best. "You can't get anything past me; I can read people like a book. But I'll admit that you're good kid."

He paused and studied me again intensely. I had the feeling that he was looking into my soul and did my best not to wriggle under his look. Nevertheless, what he next said greatly surprised me. "Hiashi was right; you'll be perfect."

"Perfect?" I questioned reluctantly.

"Funny we ran into each other today really. I think we should start our training soon." He gave me one last glance and left. I was beyond confused and tried my hardest to dismiss the odd encounter. If it was important I would find out.

During our interaction I had completely forgotten about my little pity party, but it came back in full fledge as I realized that I had once again interacted with key player in Konoha's society. I felt sick.

So after being left standing in the dust of the best torture and investigation specialist in the whole of Konoha, I continued my wondering. But this time my shoulders were slumped lower and my heart felt heavier. _Maybe by interacting with Ibiki I've resulted in the early retirement of the third and so Danzo is going to become Hokage and life as we knew it will end._

Eventually I ended up in the children's play park.

I had never really ventured to the park much. When I was younger my clansmen didn't deem it a proper activity to take part in and so no one ever took me. My friendship with Shikamaru and Choji wasn't exactly active and so there wasn't much of a chance of dragging either of them to a recreational area which would probably involve running. I easily found a seat in the middle of the park on one of the rusty swings and so I sat slumped and depressed.

It was hardly 15 minutes later when the four boys who were the reason I was no long in school found me. Apparently as soon as I had left the room they all thought it was a marvellous idea to follow me and all that I can assume is that chaos ensued within the academy classroom and Iruka-sensei screamed himself raw. I sensed their presence behind me but I pretended I didn't know they were there. I was still sour from them throwing a spider in my direction.

"I've never seen Nana move so fast before," whispered Kiba with slight awe.

"Are you sure she'll be alright? I've never seen Nana cry before," muttered Naruto with guilt.

"Shut up idiot she can hear us," snarled an obviously irate Shikamaru.

I heard someone come up behind me and then move to sit on the seat to my right. When I looked to see who it was I found the young Akimichi sat with his head bowed and a quivering lip. Choji really was a good friend.

"We're sorry Nana, we didn't think you would react so badly," whimpered the little boy. Choji was extremely loyal and kind and the idea for him of hurting one of his friends was the worst thing in the world.

"It's okay," I mumble sniffing slightly. I looked away and from him and coughed to cover up my embarrassment in being caught in such a vulnerable situation.

"Aww don't be like that Nana! I was just a joke!" Kiba came up behind me and put his arm on my shoulder. "It was just an itty-bitty spider." He was mocking me and I would not have that.

I grabbed onto the boys hand tightly and pulled hard. Kiba went flying over my shoulder and landing in a pile of bones at my feet. Akamaru landed on the boy's stomach and began yapping at me, but I ignored the pup. I gave Kiba a very dry looked that said if he wanted to mock me he should do it only at his own peril. I think he got the message as he didn't bring it up again.

"You deserved that!" Naruto laughed and jogged around me to stand and laugh at Kiba's predicament. "You got beaten up by a girl!" Naruto held his stomach and cried with laughter. Kiba was on his feet in moments, shouting straight back into the blonds face.

"I seemed to remember on many occasion in spars at school that Nana beat the hell out of you so you can hardly talk," growled the Inuzuka, raising his fists threateningly.

"It doesn't matter who beat me, I'm still going to be Hokage one day! Believe it!" shouted Naruto in return, also raising his fists.

While the two boys fought Shikamaru came and stood between me and Choji. I knew that the spider idea had come from the Nara as he would have been the only one capable of making the plan and putting all the pieces together. But just like in Shoji he could react to a situation perfectly, putting the right piece in place to counteract the opponents move, but he couldn't predict what the player was going to do next. He was getting much better at it but he was not yet good enough to have been able to predict how absolutely berserk I would go at a simple spider.

"I'm sorry," muttered the boy. "I didn't think that…" I glanced up at the boy and he turned his head away from me. "I miss calculated." Shikamaru was a genius and so, often with geniuses, they didn't like to fail. So Shikamaru had the idea that if he just didn't try it wouldn't matter if he failed. But he was so sure that it would just be a simple practical joke; throwing a spider at me.

So he was right; he miscalculated.

Shikamaru didn't give out his loyalty as easily as Choji, but when he did he gave his all to protect his friends. I couldn't stay angry at the boy so instead of a glare I opted for a small smile. "Just don't do it again," I said with mirth.

He glanced at me and gave a very serious nod in my direction. It was all sorted between us but it would seem that the whole of the class would now be aware of my biggest fear. On the other hand, Naruto was the biggest practical joker in the class so I didn't really have anything to worry about. I knew from the guilty expression on his face he wouldn't try anything like that again. So I was safe; for now.

We spent the rest of the afternoon in the park playing and having fun. But I couldn't enjoy myself to the full. I was still hesitant to say anything too big or cause any problems that could result in huge changes. It was ridiculous and I was getting irritated. But every time I let go I suddenly had this feeling of dread in my stomach, just like when I had realized that the massacre hadn't happened, and my mood would drop considerably.

Later, when Naruto, Kiba and Choji had left, Shikamaru and I sat on hill overlooking the park cloud watching together in companionable silence.

"So what's gotten you so melancholy?" Shikamaru asked casually

"What do you mean, I'm fine," I defended casually but my friend looked doubtful at my quick reply.

"You're pretty convincing but I know you're lying." The young boy stared me down and I was the first to look away. "I thought that maybe the spider would snap you out of whatever had gotten you so depressed recently."

"And look how that turned out," I said mockingly. I saw the young boy finch and felt instantly guilty. "Look it's just that..." I sighed and thought that maybe I should tell the boy something. I couldn't tell him about the massacre and my effect on the world, but I could tell my friend something else that had been bothering me. "I've got an arranged marriage."

I looked over to the young Nara and found him looked back at me with unrestrained shock. He quickly relaxed and nodded to himself saying, "that makes sense."

"Does it really?" I asked sceptically.

"Well, sure. You're an anomaly in your clan. They would want to exploit this," stated the Nara in a matter of fact voice. I grunted in conformation but didn't give him anything else. "Man, I don't know what I would do if I was in an arranged marriage. It would be so troublesome. But that's not everything though is it?" Shikamaru crossed his arms in a casual position and took a deep breath as if he was preparing to do something that would take a lot of effort and which he would rather not do.

"No," I answered truthfully. "It's just that I keep thinking that had I acted differently or done something differently or talked to different people then I would be marrying someone else or no one at all. That my life has already been planned out and that it could have been down to one simple action. That every action I do could cause something else. And now I can't stop thinking about what else I must be affecting and that I could inadvertently cause the 4th Shinobi war." I stopped myself and looked back up to the sky in shock. Well I hadn't been planning on saying that much but that pretty much covered all my angst and anxiety over the past few weeks.

Shikamaru gave a small cough supposed to cover up a laugh. "Don't worry about it. Everyone else is in the same boat," said the Lazy Nara, watching the sky drearily and smiling slightly.

"And why is that funny?" I asked defensively.

"Because it's a ridiculous thing to worry about," scoffed the young boy. "You can't live your life worrying over every tiny detail. That's how neuroses are formed."

"You just don't get it," I mumbled, angry at my worries being dismissed.

"I get it Nana and it's a valid worry. But what's the point? Just resign yourself to affecting the world around you, but if you're that upset about it then just try your best to make positive differences." Shikamaru closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Positive things, huh?"

"Yeah, so you could become a diplomat and increase relations between villages."

"That would be a lot of pressure."

"Look at the Hokage. His decisions determine the outcome of whether the village hidden in the leaves will be prosperous or not. He could decide to exterminate a whole clan. He has a huge active say in what happens. Therefore, why should we care about the little differences we might cause." Shikamaru and I stayed lying and staring up at the clouds. A small smile graced my lips as I glanced over at my genius friend.

The Nara opened his eyes and slowly stood up but I remained lying down, thinking on his words. "It's getting late and I need to head home. Man I hope my old man hasn't found out about skipping school. That would be troublesome." He waved at me and began to leave but I stood up quickly and stopped him with a hand on his shoulder.

"Thank you," I said gently. And I really meant it. For some reason all the weight that had been on my shoulders had been lifted. Shikamaru was right; I was being silly. I saw a light blush flicker across his checks as he rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. Shikamaru wasn't good with showings of emotions, but I really needed to convey to him my gratitude.

"That's fine. Down worry about it." He moved away from me and gave a wave over his shoulder once again. "See you," he called out.

I found myself smiling as I watched my friend retreat. Although this was a scary, crazy world I had landed myself in I realized, in that moment, that I was surrounded by some really amazing people who cared for me as much as I cared for them.

I started singing an old song to myself, one from another life time. "…Whatever will be, will be," I muttered in English. The language felt weird on my tongue but somehow it felt elating to say these words once again. Whatever would be would be and there was very little I could do about it.

!

Later, when I returned home with a much lighter heart I was called into my father's study. I had an inclination about why he wanted to speak to me and so prepared myself to explain my actions at school today. Yet when I walked into the study and saw Ibiki sitting and sharing a cup of tea with my father my mind completely blanked.

"Nanami," my father nodded to me. "You have met Morino-san before I believe. Today, in fact, when you were skipping school."

I attempted to stutter out a legible reply but was cut off. "I do not care for your excuses. You were not called here to discuss the matter. We have decided that you will begin to work with Morino-san and train to one day become a member of the torture and interrogation unit."

Straight to the point as always. I really should have seen this coming, and I am ashamed to say that I didn't have the slightest inclination that this could happen. I felt really stupid.

"You are to come to the Hokage tower tomorrow after school and I will instruct you on how you are to spend your time while at the academy to prepare you for your future career," Ibiki stated blandly. Hiashi and Ibiki then went back to the conversation they had been having before I had entered the room. I took this as my cue to leave and, as if in a dream, made way back to my room.

I was to be a part of Torture and interrogation? It was the craziest thing I had heard all week. If I hadn't have had that conversation with Shikamaru that afternoon then I would have probably been freaking out.

!

So the next day I entered the Hokage tower and looked around for someone to point me in the right direction. That's when a sudden bout of dizziness hit me and abruptly, without warning, I fell to the ground and passed out.

When I awoke I found myself sitting in an empty room save for two metal chairs, a table and a mirror on the far wall. There were a few blood stains on the white wash walls and floors. This was obviously an interrogation room and I swallowed involuntary. I got up from the floor and walked over to try the door. It was, of course, locked. _Worth a shot though,_ I thought with false bravado.

I went over to the table and chair and sat on the one facing the mirror. I was almost certain that there was someone behind the mirror observing me and this thought made me shiver. To calm myself from the creeping sense of forbidding I took a few breaths and began to think logically about the situation. I figured that they would have to make psychoanalysis of me before they would allow me to join the T&I department. The training was important but you needed to have the right mental capacity to work in such a ruthless environment. But knocking me out and having me wake up in a scary room was a little over the top.

I was kind of scared but if I looked at it as a kind of game the over ruling emotion turned to anticipation. And so, bottling up any sane thoughts, I began to feel excitement to see what they had planned.

As I blocked out these thoughts I felt like a bit of a masochist as I sat there wondering with amusement what type of psychological testing they would throw at me. Maybe this really was the department for me if I could so easily lock away any emotion attachment to such a situation. I felt a small smile make its way onto my lips as I slouched back into the chair and crossed my arms comfortably. I entertained the idea of putting my feel up on the table, but it was too tall for that.

I had been sitting in the room for about half an hour when someone finally entered and took the seat opposite me on the table. He wasn't anyone I recognised but I quickly picked up that they were under a henge. It might be Ibiki or he might be standing on the other side of the glass. Whether I failed this test or not I decided I was going to have some fun.

"You know that I am only nine years old and that this is rather intimidating, right?" I asked the man sceptically.

The man leaned forward on the table, placed his hand together and gave me the most condescending look he could probably muster.

"Do you know why you are here?" asked the man.

"Are you asking me that question because you don't know the answer?" I asked with a disapproving look. The only reaction from the man was that he blinked a few times.

"You are here because you've had a psychotic break down," said the man gently. I paused for a moment and looked down in thought.

So this was their game? It was rather… weak. I wouldn't believe it if it wasn't taking place right in front of me. I glanced back up at the guy and found him to be looking at me politely. And where had they found this guy? I could tell he was on edge and alert which in turn made me believe him even less – not that I was inclined to believe that I had a psychotic breakdown, but he could have been slightly more convincing.

"Where is here?" I replied, deciding to humour him.

"In a secure location where you are safe. A place for people like you."

"So a crazy home?"

"I would call it a mental recuperation centre," answered the man neutrally.

"And I'm here because I had a mental breakdown?"

"Correct."

"Right…" I said with a calculating look. "Although this is a completely plausible reason why I might be here I don't believe you. I would like to say that if I ended up in a psycho-hospital it would be because I claimed to be God or something." I gave the man an extremely serious expression and mirrored his position on the table. I gave him a condescending look that matched his own and smiled. "So how does it feel to be in the presence of a God?" I asked off handily. This threw the man off and he sat back slightly, straightening up, but he skilfully kept a straight face. I gave him an amused expression before copying his movement.

"You believe you are a God?" asked the man with a raised eyebrow.

I raised my eyebrow as well. "No but if you're saying I went crazy I would want it to be for something other than a mental break down. So I'm going to say that I am a God," I crossed my armed over my chest and watched as the man did exactly the same thing. He then caught himself doing it and placed his hands on his legs instead.

"So you believe you are superior to other humans?" questioned the man in the same gentle tone that was really starting to grate on my nerves.

"Of course not!" I replied, outraged.

"But Gods are more superior aren't they? Therefore you must consider yourself above others."

"As a God I created the world. So I have to respect each of the creations and see them as equals. That's what a good ruler does, right?" It was a rhetorical question but he nodded anyway.

"So you remember creating the world then?"

"Don't be ridiculous I didn't create the world," I stated as if the man was stupid.

"But you just claimed to be God," counted the man.

"I may claim to be God but that doesn't mean I actually am God. You're very gullible aren't you?" I looked down at my nails and examined them, ignoring the other person in the room.

We sat in silence for a few minutes until my stomach grumbled. "Curiously, how long have I been here? I'm hungry."

"You have been here for three years," said the man. Was this guy for real?

"Oh, so not only did I have a psychotic break down, but I also have memory loss," I stated dryly. "I'm Penelope Clearwater by the way. What's your name?"

"Your name is not Penelope, it is Nanami. I am Jonjo," said the man stoically. He was lying, I could tell.

"No it isn't. What's your real name?" I asked, tilting my head to the side. He gave no reply and I signed dejectedly. "Well, whatever. Can I go now?"

"You cannot go but I will get you some food if you admit that you are in a mental recuperation centre and need help to recover from your mental condition."

"That's a fair compromise. However, I thought we already agreed that I had memory loss and therefore must completely take your word for it. But if that's what you say then sure then I admit that I am currently in a mental hospital and I need help. Do you take orders? Can I have ramen?"

The man looked at me, stood up and left. I watched him go with a smile and rested my chin on the table. A small giggle escaped my lips when I was alone. Hardly 2 minutes later Ibiki walked in followed by a young boy a couple of years older than me. He had sandy coloured hair and blank face.

"You would be surprised how many people we manage to convince that they are crazy," said Morino, taking a seat. The boy just stood by the door and stared at me with slight resentment. I couldn't understand why and so decided to ignore him.

"Technically she failed the test because she did admit she was crazy," said the boy, looking at me with cold distain, as if I was something nasty he had accidently stepped in.

"What's your problem?" I asked with a pout and a frown. He graced me with an uninterested look and began to study the wall. It seemed that I wasn't worth his acknowledgement. What a prick.

"Now now, calm down. She more than passed the test," said Ibiki, smiling at me with amusement.

"So people actually fall for that? Are you joking?" I snorted disbelievingly.

"Well, considering your age we dumbed it down a lot." Ibiki gave another smile but this time the expression on his face was more sadistic than amused. I held back a shiver as I could only imagine what they did to adults who went through the T&I test. It was one of those moments when I was glad to still be a kid. "Well then, I suppose I should tell you where you'll be going from here."

Ibiki pulled out a file from his leather trench coat and laid it on the table; sliding it across to me lazily. I picked up the file, opened it and was unsurprised to see that it was my very own. I studied it for a few moments before closing it once again. There was nothing in there I didn't already know and they actually had less information on me than I thought they might. They knew nothing of my training within my clan or my curse-seal. It wasn't until that moment that I realised how closely guarded the clans actually were with their members, and I suddenly became acutely aware of the seal on the back of my neck. _None more secretive than the Hyuuga,_ I thought sombrely.

"We've had you pinned for a while now as a possible T&I interrogator," spoke Ibiki seriously.

"I'm still a child," I mumbled with a raised eyebrow at the torture genius.

"How odd that you have this perception of childhood when you were raised in a hidden village which trains you from birth to learn how to kill and be killed for your villages," stated the man in a casual manor.

"Touché," I muttered.

"You will not begin proper work for our department until you have graduated. We might speed the process up though."

"I thought that only happened in times of war?"

"Or if someone particularly talented comes along," said the man with an appraising look in my direction. I heard a snort come from the corner of the room where the boy was standing.

"Hardly talented," said the boy with disinterest.

"Pouty-pants over there has a point," I said, brushing the insult away with practised ease. The fact that I had agreed with the boy seemed to make him dislike me even more.

"We have had many reports of your particular skills both in and outside the academy. At school you are above average, normally not enough to grant you early graduation, but academia for a Ninja is hardly the most important. Like I said, you've been pinned for this position for years now. Not every day is a Hyuuga born without a Byakugan, and any that are born without your clan's kekkei genkai seemed to have followed the trend of interrogation genius. You may have duties to your clan but you also have a duty to your village. I can tell this is where you were meant to be. Not to mention your dry humour will allow you to last a very long time in our wicked profession." He gave me a toothy grin that was anything but inviting.

"Besides, you are needed," Ibiki leaned forward on the table and placed his hands together. His face had changed quickly to one which was deadly serious and I sat a bit straighter unconsciously.

"Needed how?" I asked but not really wanting to know the answer. At this, however, Ibiki smiled once again.

Ibiki looked over to the sandy haired boy and beckoned him to stand forward. The boy narrowed his eyes in my direction but did what Ibiki said - I just stuck my tongue out in return. "Now now children, play nice. Nanami, I would like you to meet Yoda; your team mate and partner for, probably, the rest of your ninja career." At Ibiki's words my mind blanked.

I looked to the boy, to Ibiki, and back to the boy. Two things were going through my head in that moment. One was that I was going to be stuck with this boy for a long time and that neither of us had really gotten off on the right foot. Two was that he was called Yoda. Yoda… as in Yoda? The star wars character Yoda. The little green elf thing. Yoda.

"Yoda… Yoda… you're called… Yoda?" I couldn't hide the disbelief or the amusement in my voice.

"Don't laugh at me," hissed the boy.

"Okay… Yoda," I said snuffling a laugh.

"Stop laughing," he repeated.

"Whatever you say… Yoda," I laugh burst through my lips and the boy took a step forward in agitation.

"Hold yourself together. If you find such a thing difficult maybe you should reconsider your career as a shinobi." He didn't sound angry but more slightly irritated.

"Don't you mean jedi!" I burst out laughing uncontrollably at my own joke. Oh man, the most disappointing thing was that no one else in this world would ever appreciate the hilarity of the situation.

"I do not understand," said the boy looking indignant at my laughter. "Why is she laughing?" He turned to Ibiki who shrugged his shoulders in return.

"You both have social issues to work through I suppose," said the torture specialist. My laughter calmed down in the back of my throat and I looked at the boy in question with a smile.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you," I said, a giggle desperately trying to escape but I held it back with all my will power. Yoda didn't take my apology seriously and seemed to think I was still mocking him, and so he turned his back to me and raised his nose in the air proudly.

"I don't understand though," I said turning to Ibiki. "Why am I going to work with… Yoda?" I held back the laugh expertly and felt proud of myself.

"You see Yoda cannot engage with people on an emotional level because of his upbringing," Ibiki explained seriously. Yoda's head snapped round to Ibiki and looked sharply at the elder man. Ibiki just looked back at him unflinchingly. "I do not joke when I say that you shall be working together for a long time to come. She will need to know sooner rather than later," he said with a straight face. Ibiki then went on. "He was in a section of ANBU which specializes in unemotional operates, but he was too emotional to remain in their charge. With all his skill we claimed him for our own, but have found that although he can interrogate people on a physical level, he cannot in turn affect them on a psychological and emotional level as he hasn't got very much emotional empathy. Something that is key in interrogation; you need to be able to understand what the other person is thinking.

"This is where you will come in. A lot of the time it is difficult to be good at both mental and physical interrogation anyway as both need a different mind-set to achieve; and switching between the mind-sets can lead to all sorts of problems in multi-personality disorder or bi-polar. Therefore it is not infrequent for interrogation specialists to partner up and have one as a physical interrogator and another as a mental interrogator. This is what we have planned for you. Nanami, you would have been down for an all-round specialist but considering your delicate situation within your clan we cannot risk it. Do you understand what I am saying?"

I looked at the man in shock. That was one hell of a mental overload I had just received. Yoda was looking down at the ground stoically. He must feel uncomfortable about talking about his failure as a Shinobi in Root; for I assumed it was Root that they were talking about. Ibiki wasn't kidding when he said Yoda had some social issues to work out. "So you're saying that I will become a psychological interrogator? And that Yoda and I will be partners, filling in each other's weak spots?" I spoke slowly and unsurely.

"That is exactly what I am saying," said Ibiki, glancing at his watch quickly. "I must go shortly and so will round up what will happen from now no. Yoda and you shall be training together on regular occasions. The reason we have addressed this now and not when you have left the academy is because the younger you get into your mind that this will be your job the better and more efficient you will be without significant psychological trauma. You two also need to become an effective team and this will take time. You must learn to trust each other whole heartedly within these walls. This can be a dangerous game, and you need a trusted comrade."

I looked over to Yoda and looked him directly in the eye. He did the same and gave me an uncertain look. I nodded my head at the boy in agreement with Ibiki and said boy nodded lightly in return. I then looked away and addressed Ibiki.

"So you're conditioning me to the life of an interrogator in the Konoha Torture and Interrogation unit. Great," I mumbled with near hysterical humour.

Ibiki let out a loud, belly laugh and stood up. "Yes," he said honestly. "That is exactly what we are doing. I think you will make it far around here Hyuuga Nanami."

He motioned for me to follow him out of the room and we walked together, through twists and turns and hallways I was sure I would never be able to find my way out of again, until we were once again standing at the front entrance of the Hokage toward.

"Yoda will collect you every Saturday at dawn until dusk and every day after school. You will come here and you will train together on the art of interrogation. This will continue until you graduate the academy and can begin full time. Any questions?"

Before I could even open my mouth Ibiki had left and I was simply standing in the doorway gapping like a fish. "Well that was unexpected," I muttered dryly. I was about to step away when I felt a hand descend on my shoulder, preventing me from leaving. When I glanced around I saw it was Yoda and frowned. I hadn't realized he'd even been following us.

"Hyuuga Nanami," he simply said. I shrugged his hand off and looked up at the boy.

"Yes?" I asked wearily.

"You are very odd," he said with a straight face. "I do not want to work with you." Well at least he was to the point.

"I'm not too crazy about working with you either," I said in return with a raised eyebrow and a small smirk.

"It will certainly be interesting," said the boy seriously and without emotion.

I gave a barking laugh and smiled up at the boy with unrestrained amusement. This seemed to put him on edge immediately. It dawned on me that he probably wasn't used to frequent displays of emotion if he had been copped up in Root all this time. Then again, being a Hyuuga I shouldn't be showing any emotion at all anyway, but I had always been rather lax with this particular rule.

It might be fun to get this guy to lighten up, and I found myself looking forward to the challenge. "Aww, don't worry Jedi," I said with suggestive eyes, "I'm sure we're going to have loads of fun together." I winked at the boy and I could tell he was taken aback. I almost felt sorry for him.

"You really are odd. A bit of a fool really," Yoda said stoically but with an unsure edge.

"Playing the fool is always so much fun though," I said cryptically. The boy frowned momentarily and I laughed at his confusion. "I'll see you on Saturday Jedi." I turned away from the boy and began to walk back home. However I couldn't resist one more joke before I left and so called over my shoulder, "and may the force be with you!" I then burst into loud, joyous laughter and skipped home giggling to myself most of the way.

!

The next day Shikamaru and I were sitting on the tables in class during the 15 minute gap between lessons. I told my friend about my new, promising career in the T&I department and he just snorted in amusement and agreed that it would probably be my perfect job considering how irritating I could be. I decided to take that as a compliment. We sat together in companionable silence for a few moments before Shikamaru broke the peaceful atmosphere with a question.

"So who's the lucky guy?"

"Huh?"

"Who are you getting married to?"

"That's random… but I don't know," I replied with a pout. "The not knowing bit is extremely irritating and I won't even find out until I'm 18."

"Why 18? That doesn't make sense," said Shikamaru as he sat up straighter with a puzzled look on his face. "An arranged marriage is all about clan collaboration and inter-village relations. Wouldn't it be more beneficial to announce the engagement?"

I glanced over to my friend with surprise. I hadn't thought about that and, really, it didn't make sense to not announce the coming together of two clans. "Why do you think they're not saying anything then?" I asked Shikamaru. "I know you have a theory, so out with it."

"Well it could be a number of reasons I suppose. Sometimes when marriages between two clans are announced then there can be conflict from other clans who feel they have been cheated. Especially with a clan such as yours who only ever marry females outside their own bloodline if they don't have the Byakugan. Maybe your clan was worried that other clans within the village would throw up as fuss about unfair advantageous marriages." Shikamaru had a look of deep concentration on his face and I witnessed the boy bring his hands together and form his trademark 'thinking triangle', as I liked to call it.

"No, that doesn't sound right." It was a fair assessment of the situation but that couldn't be the only reason. "What else you got?"

"Well, it could also be problems with the other clan I suppose. Inter-clan conflict that the Hyuuga doesn't want to be associated with until it's resolved or maybe even that your clan didn't have a choice in the match and it was ordered by the Hokage? Or maybe even…" Shikamaru continued to come up with plausible theories but I stopped listening after a while.

_Inter-clan conflict? That couldn't mean…_ I gulped audibly and paled slightly at the idea. _And it would explain why… I hope I'm wrong._

Shikamaru cut off his train of thought and looked at me oddly. "Hey Nanami, what you thinking?"

"You don't think that I'm going to have to marry… Sasuke?" I squeaked.

"Yes?" I hadn't realized it but said Uchiha had been sitting behind us the entire time. "What are you two talking about?" Sasuke looked at me between glaring eyes as if he knew that I was up to no good. I recovered quickly from the surprise of seeing him there and stuck my tongue out at the boy with petulance.

"We were talking about you; not to you. So mind your own business," I sneered.

"I'll mind who's ever business I please," retorted the Uchiha.

"Sure, do whatever you want. I'll just beat you up again." I smirked at the boy in amusement as I saw the heat start to rise in his face.

"You did not beat me up!"

Sasuke and I bickered for a good 10 minutes before Iruka sensei came back in and instructed the whole class to settle down. Sasuke returned to his desk in a huff having completely lost the battle of wits with me.

As soon as I had taken my seat next to Choji and Shikamaru my face instantly dropped and I let my head bang against the desk in frustration.

"Well you definitely have the chemistry," muttered a certain spikey hair genius to my left.

"Shut up," I growled. My stomach then suddenly seemed to get a very bad case of the butterflies. "You don't think that Sasuke and I… That really… I mean, I know his parents wanted us to be friends but…"

Shikamaru gave a very unattractive snort. "Who cares for now? Worrying about it would just be troublesome. You have years until that actually becomes relevant."

"Sometimes I think you have a far too lax view on life," I told my friend in a matter of fact voice. However, I did take the Nara's advice, as I knew he was right, and put it to the back of my mind where it wouldn't bother me. Sasuke wasn't that bad, not really. Besides there really was very little I could do about it and it was just a theory anyway; we could be completely wrong. And plus, I was a going to be a Ninja when I grew up and who knew if I'd even make it to 18. No stress.

"By the way, you tell anyone about this and I will hunt you down." I cast a sideways look at my friend who just gave me a straight dead stare back.

"Please don't insult my intelligence," said the lazy Nara. "I don't have a death wish."

I smiled wickedly and tried my best to forget our previous conversation. I was only eight and so I had ten years to go until this whole mess became an actual problems. I had a lot bigger issues to deal with before then.

!

**I hope this chapter cleared up some issues from the last chapter about why they ****_might_**** possibly be waiting until there 18 to announce the engagement.**

**So this chapter turned out mega long but at least you now know where Nana's going to go in life. I didn't want it to be the typical OC joining team Kakashi, I wanted it to be different! Sasuke?! WHAT? I would very much like to hear your thoughts on Shikamaru's theory of who Nana's going to marry! You'll get to hear more on that in the next chapter as well! So yeah, a fear of spiders… I actually thought that Nanami's reaction to that was perfectly valid and some people just really, REALLY hate spiders and completely go to tears when they see one. Especially one so big and hairy and I'm getting shivers just thinking about it. **

**So there was a lot of Shikamaru and Nana interaction in this chapter as I just think the two bounce off each other so well, bless 'em. And last Yoda… okay so the name kind of ran away with itself but I hope that it at least added some comedy value. He will be an important character and I am sure you will grow to love him. He's a bit like Sai but not as detached as he actually never made the cut for Root. **

**So thank you again all you wonderful readers and please tell me what you think if you have a spare few minutes. Sorry for any spelling errors, please forgive my poor grammar and I'll see you soon! **


	9. Chapter 9

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 9

'_If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.' - Sun Tzu_

_Three years later_

The day of my genin exams went as follows.

As the morning dawned bright and early I was awoken from my peaceful slumber with an almighty slap around the face.

"You look ugly when you sleep," said a voice hovering above me. I blinked a few times in puzzlement and disorientation. It took hardly a few seconds to register the stinging sensation on my right cheek and the sand coloured hair obscuring my view of the ceiling.

I usually managed to wake up before he managed to slap me and was slightly angry at myself for my lack of awareness. So I did what any normal shinobi raised child would do; I punched the sandy haired boy in the gut very, very hard. Said boy buckled under the unexpected pressure to his abdomen as I sat up in bed; rubbing my probably bright red cheek. I wasn't at all shocked by the unconventional waking as this was usually how Yoda woke me up on training day's if I wasn't already awake by the time he came to collect me.

Looking out the window I noted that it was a little before sunrise and pouted. It was too early.

"Why are you here?" I complained to my partner who was now rolling around on the floor groaning. "I have my genin exams today. Let me sleep." I sat back in bed but found that I was already wide awake and there was really no point in even attempting to close my eyes.

Yoda made an illegible reply and I just roll my eyes at his dramatics. Not that he was being dramatic though, as I did have one nasty left hook and that punch in the stomach had to have hurt. I yawned, stretched and stood up. I stepped over Yoda's fallen body and made my way over to the bowl in the corner of the room to wash and freshen up.

"I thought we could train. You need all the help you can get if you're actually going to pass this exam," explain the teen after recovering from my attack.

"I'm very confident in my own abilities thank you very much," I said coolly; giving the ex-root operative an exasperated expression.

Yoda just hummed in acknowledgment at my reply as he poked around my room like a curious dog, something I never would have expected from him three years ago. Now, however, it was as if someone had turned on a switch in his head and he suddenly wanted to know everything. At thirteen years of age he was still emotionally constipated but at least he had progressed slightly. So much so that the only reason he was there that morning was because he was worried about me. Not that he would ever tell me that but I wasn't (soon to be) part of the T&I unit for nothing.

When I was ready and dressed Yoda and I went to our usual training grounds and ran through all the jutsu I could possibly be asked in the exam. This included; body transfer, transformation and clone techniques. Now, as you already know, I had huge difficulties with my chakra. I could control it but I struggled to use vast amounts of it at one time. Therefore, I couldn't do any type of ninjutsu very easily. So if I were going to mess up with anything in this exam it would be on the ninjutsu.

Thus, the stupid Jedi made me repeat them over and over again every chance he got. You know what they say; 'practise makes perfect' and Yoda and his over the top intensive training sessions allowed me to finally perfect these jutsu. Yet, what Yoda seemed to sometimes forget, was that I was only human and only eleven and so had my limits.

"Enough!" I complained, stamping my foot for emphasis. "If I practise these anymore then I'll run out of chakra." I crossed my arms over my chest and sat on the floor in an undignified heap.

"I suppose it will do," muttered the sandy hair teen with a frown.

Following that we ran through a number of kata's; Yoda with his katana and me with my Bow staff. When we were done with those we fought. Now I should tell you that over the past few years I had actually gotten quite effective in fighting with my staff and could easily fight off a genin who was using only taijutsu. This was all thanks to the brutal teaching techniques of the almost-ANBU operative Yoda. With him it was a 'learn fast or die trying' approach. When I told him this he reassured me that he wouldn't actually take my life if things got to that, but I wasn't so sure.

Anyway, so I was pretty reliable in a fight but I was nothing compared to my partner. He was as fast as the wind and as precise as he could be and I'm going to be honest; I was jealous. I never could get anywhere close to beating him but the whole thing was a learning experience and I was certainly learning a lot about dodging from the guy. And, to be fair to him, he was a pretty good teacher.

Yoda had grown attached to me during our time together and, if my assumption was correct, I was his only friend in the world. So it was perfectly understandable that he was worried that I wouldn't pass the exam and so we wouldn't be able to start properly working together as a team. I thought it was kind of sweet that he was fussing over me like a mother hen, making sure I was ready for my 'big day'.

Yoda and I had gained a rather odd kind of friendship. I had to slowly introduce the idea of friendship to him because he had never come across the concept before in his emotionally sheltered life in Root. But it was hard not to become friends with someone when you had trained and worked together almost every day for the past several years; knowing each other's strengths and weaknesses inside and out.

When we had first started working together he was unsure and reluctant to do anything other than grimace in my face at my mistakes and look smug at his own accomplishments. He would trip me on purpose and more than once Ibiki had to break up a fight between the two of us. Once he got so tired of our bickering that he locked us in an interrogation room all night. He thought it was hilarious when he came in the next morning and found that we had fallen asleep leaning on each other for comfort. Yoda hadn't spoken to me for a week following that incident and became even more snobbish than usual.

It's true to say that at first he had a rather big superiority complex, but fortunately I soon enough beat this out of him and he started to open up. Now, you know when you expect someone to open up and it turns out that there was always a little lost puppy inside them just begging for a little attention?

Yeah? No. That isn't what happened here. He didn't have enough emotional capabilities to even know what a little lost puppy should be. Instead, he was more like a little lost sociopath.

Which was fine; I wasn't one to judge psychological problems when I had the mind of an adult hidden in my pre-pubescent body. So I dealt with it and accepted him, which I don't think he was ever expecting. He told me about his past and how he had joined Root after his parent's deaths when he was seven and that the ANBU organisation had never been able to properly condition him to act without questioning orders and without feelings.

"Well you seem pretty detached from emotions to me," I had commented one sunny, sticky Thursday afternoon a few months after we had first started training together. We were sitting under a tree in the far corner of one of the many training grounds dotted throughout Konoha. We had been running through some paired combat for hours and after nearly fainting from heat exhaustion I had refused to continue and so here we found ourselves collapsed in the shade.

"Not nearly as detached as some of my old comrades," muttered the boy mournfully.

"Well that's not a bad thing," I contradicted. "I mean, you're pretty stuffy so I couldn't even begin to imagine what they would be like."

"They are deadly killing machines," said Yoda blankly and with a hint of jealousy.

"Who would want to be a machine?" I looked over to the Sandy coloured boy.

"I would like to be an instrument of killing used for the benefit of my village. A machine would not feel pointless emotions." Yoda sneered at the ground and turned his head away so I wouldn't glance the expression. I stood up from my position against the tree, walked over to the moody boy and stood over him with my hands on his hips.

"Well tough!" I shouted in his face. "You must be a person because I don't make friends with machines!" I grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him off the ground, bringing him face to face with me and looking unblinkingly in his eyes.

"Who said we were friends anyway?" scoffed Yoda scornfully, but this time there wasn't as much venom in his bite, as if he was unsure of something.

"I said we're friends so you better believe it!" I yelled at the boy. I then froze with a wide eye look and dropped my partner on the floor. "And I just sounded like Naruto…" I muttered with a dry throat and a small pout. Dam the blond had really worn off on me.

"You sound like an idiot," Yoda said, picking himself off the floor. He kept his head away from me but I could see a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips.

"Hey! Shut up you stupid Jedi!" I shouted back but more light hearted then before.

From then on we were officially friends. Ibiki hadn't let us learn anything about T&I until we became an effective team and so as soon as we had reached the friendship milestone he allowed us to start to learn our respective trades; me with mental manipulation and him with physical torture. This was where Yoda and I went our separate ways to try and learn our individual professions. Ibiki took Yoda under his wing and I was passed over to Yamanaka Inoichi to train with him during my free time after school.

Yoda and I spent a lot of time together still, when we weren't with our respective sensei's, to keep up our team work. Yet despite this my partner never really came into contact with any of my other friends much, but he did meet Neji on a few occasions. The first time they met it was on one of the days when Yoda had to physically drag me from my bed to get me up and train with him. The ex-ANBU operative was usually very successful at sneaking into the compound without getting seen – he was practically my personal alarm clock. The first time that Neji saw Yoda sneaking into my room was actually pretty funny.

I was sound asleep, as are most at five in the morning, but as soon as I registered a menacing presence in the room I woke up and went on alert. I felt the air shift around me and before my partner could land a blow across my face I reach up and grabbed his wrist in a tight grip. Without opening my eyes I elbowed Yoda in the groin and rolled over to continue my sleep. Yoda let out a rather undignified yelp and collapsed on the floor; clutching his crown jewels.

And this was the moment Neji decided to walk in.

"What do you think you are doing in my sister's bedroom?" came a voice from the entrance to my room.

"You must be Neji," said a choked reply from the fallen boy on the floor.

"I was about to protect my sisters honour, but I see that she had already done the duty for me," said my brother with amusement and yet still suspicious of the intruder. "Who are you?" The floorboards creaked as Neji walked further into the room and stopped when he was standing directly over my fallen partner. "Actually it does not matter who you are, you are intruding on Hyuuga property and therefore will be dealt with accordingly."

I heard the noise of a body being dragged away and smiled to myself. I must have hit him harder in his unmentionables than I thought to have incapacitated him for so long. Yoda was technically ex-ANBU and could destroy Neji if he really wanted.

_Karma's a bitch,_ I thought menacingly. He shouldn't have been walking me up at ungodly hours on weekends. Had it been slightly earlier and had I been slightly more awake, I might have rescued him from the merciless clutches of my brother. As it was I was too tired and so immediately after hearing my door close I drifted off to sleep.

Later on that morning when I had woken up again and gotten ready for the day, I went in search of my brother. I found Neji meditating under the Sakura blossom tree and so took a seat next to him.

"So about that boy who you dragged from my room this morning…" I started leaning against the tree and crossing my legs casually.

"You won't have to worry about him bothering you anymore," replied Neji and as he opened his eyes and looked at me with a blank face.

"Hmm…" I hummed in amusement. "Well you see that was Yoda; you know my partner I told you about? He likes waking me up and dragging me out of bed really early."

"What? Then why did you assault him if he's your comrade?" Neji looked at me with slight horror.

"Because he likes waking me up and dragging me out of bed really early. Weren't you listening?" I looked at my brother like he was stupid and moved to stand up. He just gave me an apprehensive look in return that questioned my sanity slightly. "What did you do with him anyway? I suppose it's about time to start training."

"I simply dragged and dumped him outside the gates of the compound." Neji attempted to compose himself once again and return to meditation, but I could see already that it was a lost cause.

"Did you give any embarrassing speeches about how he should never come near me again?" I asked hopefully and with an amused glint in my eyes.

Neji gave me a dry look. "That would be unnecessary. I thought he would have learnt his lesson considering the state I found him in. However, if I should catch him again I will know to leave him be. He is your team mate so you can deal with him."

I gave a slight shrug and went off in search of my sandy haired partner. Leaving the compound at the front gates I was immediately greeted with the sight of a boy sitting on the wall opposite the entrance with his arms cross over his chest and a slight pout gracing his features. I had never seen Yoda pout and so it was a novel experience which I took the time to appreciate as I approached him.

"Yoda?" I questioned, trying to catch eye contact with the boy.

"That wasn't as fun as it usually is," mumbled the youth with a sour expression.

"Yeah, well, what goes around comes around," I said with a self-satisfied air, and yet I heard guilt lacing my tone. If I was going to be honest I felt slightly bad about being so harsh with the boy. I didn't mean to hit him so hard that he couldn't move – and possibly not have children. I moved my hand around to the back of my head and ruffled my hair in embarrassment. "I explained to Neji who you were and he said that he won't come and forcibly drag you out of my room again. And I'll try not to hit you so hard next time."

I looked at the floor and purse my lips awkwardly. It was a half arsed apology and he knew it, but at least it was something. When I glanced back up to Yoda I found that he had his usual blank mask occupying his features and yet something in his eyes made them softer than they usually were. Before I could look more into the expression Yoda clipped me around the left ear like a scolded child and then jumped to the side out of range of my retaliation.

"Well then, are you ready for me to beat you in training once again? I thought you might have improved slightly in all the time we're been working together, but you are still an extremely poor fighter compared to me." And with these words he marched away in the direction of the training grounds with me following after him angrily; killer intent practically spilling from my pours.

When Yoda first started his lessons with Ibiki I was worried about the young teen and his mental wellbeing. I mean being a torturer had to be a pretty heavy job, but my fears were ungrounded. In a way it was perfect that Yoda was partly a psychopath because it meant that later on, when he actually became an active member of the torture unit, he wouldn't be affected by others pain. He wouldn't enjoy it like some sadist but he also wouldn't shy away from it. It was just something that had to get done; his job.

Not only this but I hadn't factored in that Yoda was actually over two years older than me and was officially an ANBU operative. Thus, he had a large amount of field experience. This also meant that not only was Yoda training, but he was also going on missions and playing an active role in the great community of Konoha.

I could say I was jealous but I wasn't, and that was because of one person; Inoichi. He was a fantastic sensei who taught me some of the greatest life lessons anyone could have.

"In a game of wits," he said, "you need to be on your toes the whole time. You need to know your own weaknesses inside and out so that if someone ever tries to use them against you, you can still gain control of the situation. Mental manipulation is a game of Shogi."

You could tell that Inoichi was good friends with Shikaku as we always started off our sessions with a game of Shogi. It seemed that everyone in this world just wanted me to play this stupid board game! Knowing my father I would say that one of the reasons he had been teaching me to play this game since I was very young was because he had been planning all along for me to join the T&I unit.

And according to Inoichi; "Everything within that interrogation room is a game. You need to win that game and the only way you'll be able to do that is if you stay 20 steps ahead of your opponent and prepared to change your game plan if something goes wrong."

Now I have to admit something to you; Inoichi was my first crush. He was just gorgeous, and what was even more embarrassing was that he knew I had a crush on him and found it cute. It was a degrading experience. However, fortunately for me this crush didn't last very long.

Now I can imagine that you probably think that I had a holiday in training compared to Yoda. Wrong! Inoichi did whatever he could do to get under my skin and wind me up.

Things Inoichi-sensei did to annoy me included; continuously calling me Mimina because he thought it 'sounded better', inviting me to have ramen with him but leaving before the bill came so I had to pay, and somehow (probably with the help of Ino) spreading a rumour around school that I was actually a boy but just liked to dress like a girl. Naruto actually came up to me and said that he was very offended that I had never told him but that he would accept me for who I wanted to be. I almost cried with how sweet he was being, but then I punched him in the face for believing the stupid rumour. I mean, did I really look like a boy?

The most frustrating one was when Inoichi said he was going to shut me in a room for three hours so that I could find a state of 'inner-peace' without outside influence. However, he 'forgot' I was in there and left it for 24 hours instead.

I sometimes got to hang out with Ino after training and because of this Ino became my closest girl-friend. Well, that is to say, my only girl-friend apart from Hinata (who didn't count because she was related to me). Unfortunately she was also training under her father and so asked me, very politely, if I wouldn't mind helping her practise her mind-body transfer jutsu. Of course I said yes but the experience wasn't pleasurable. I endured through and Inoichi got a good few laughs out of it too.

So there were a lot of light-hearted pranks that my sensei pulled on me and on quite a few occasions with the help of Ino, but sometimes he got serious and really hit some major pressure points. Usually I could take it, I had pretty thick skin, but Inoichi needed to teach me a lesson I would never forget. It was our last ever session together as student and teacher as the following week I would be taking my Genin exam and I needed to concentrate on my studies for that. Inoichi-sensei had said that when I became a genin I would no longer be his pupil but his comrade. So we played one last game of Shogi together.

"So you've got an arranged marriage Mimi," stated the Yamanaka clan head casually.

"Yeah," I said in confirmation, not really listening to Inoichi as I moved a piece on the board and took his knight.

"You must be pretty angry having your clan plan your life for you." The man spoke with a careless tone, completely contradictory to the subject at hand.

"Not really," I answered nonchalantly, waiting for the big bomb to drop.

"You're not really even a person. More like a piece of goods to be traded between clans." Inoichi looked down at the board and moved a piece to take one of mine. I simply smiled at his observation as it brushed over me like water off a ducks back. I knew these problems but had overcome them a while back; I didn't care anymore.

"I suppose you're correct," I mumble with a bored persona around me.

"Well it not really the clan whose doing this; its more Hiashi, your own uncle. Man, you must hate his guts for the death of your father," Inoichi's tone suddenly became very serious and he glanced up at me with a sharp look, as if anticipating a volcanic eruption. All I could do was smile at his caution.

"Say that to my brother and you might find the reaction you are looking for," I said with a wistful expression which hid the tightness in my shoulders which I forced to relax.

"Yes, your brother. So much potential. It's such a shame really." Inoichi shook his head and moved another piece of the board.

"I know what you're trying to do so stop it," I said lightly but with warning behind my tone.

"I mean, with that curse-seal that your clan use. No freewill. That has to be hard." The light hearted tone had once again entered my sensei's tone as he continued to play the game of wits.

I didn't comment. I moved a piece of the board without thought and a moment later it was taken by Inoichi. He was getting to me and he knew it. But what right did he have to make such comments? No right at all, that's what.

Inoichi looked at me with cold eyes as he said his next words. "Not that you'll know anything about that though. You may have an arranged marriage but at least you have freedom. You're the lucky one in the family I suppose. Do you think your brother resents you for your freedom? Do you think he would even hate you for not ever understanding him?" Inoichi sneered in my face and my blood boiled at the injustice of his words. But what was most difficult was that he was bringing up fears that I had kept hidden deep inside me for so long. I knew that Neji loved me, but there was always that doubt that he would hate me, like he did Hinata, because I did not have the curse seal.

"I said stop it," I said through gritted teeth; standing in an attempt to remove myself from the situation as bitterness welded up inside me. As I went to turn and storm out of the room Inoichi stood as well and grabbed onto my arm tightly, preventing me from leaving.

"Stop running from the truth. You can't hide from who you are so confront it. You should feel grateful that you don't have the same fate as some of your clansmen; as your brother. If he resents you then there is nothing you can do." If Neji did hate me then it would break my heart into a million pieces. Because I did understand what he was going through, because I was going through it as well. I put my hands over my ears and closed my eyes tightly shut. Inoichi continued to tell me how I was like Hinata in my position and that Neji must see himself as below me and that he must have at least some resentment towards me and-

"Shut up!" I shouted at my sensei with all the venom I could muster. He didn't know anything and his judgemental words cut me like a knife. I didn't ask for any of this, and yet I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Not being able to talk freely with even my own brother because of this stupid curse seal! Having to go through an arranged marriage because I was not tied to the clan through the Byakugan and yet having the curse-seal imprinted on me for the rest of my life anyway!

"Survivors guilt," stated the man as he placed checkmate, and the game was over. I looked down at the board with a blank expression and realization at what he had been doing. How had I let him get under my skin like that? However Inoichi's next words caused me some confusion. "…I think."

"You think?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"Well, there's obviously something else going on here that I don't know about. You're very good at hiding it and I only guessed because I know you so well," said the Yamanaka with a thoughtful expression. "I know that the Hyuuga are hiding something, but I suppose that's not my place to pry." The Yamanaka looked to the side, lost in thought.

I didn't acknowledge Inoichi's observations.

"Nanami," spoke a gentle voice, completely contradictory from the coldness it had, just moments before, held. I looked over to my sensei of three years with pursed lips. Inoichi walked around the Shogi board and came face to face with me, placing a hand on my shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"What have I told you about your weaknesses?" he asked with a light heart.

"That I must know them inside out," I said with slumped shoulders.

"It has been a privilege to teach you and be your sensei. But if there is something I wish you to have learnt from me, it would be this. Know yourself better than anyone else in the world. This could be the difference between life and death."

That was the most valuable lesson anyone, to this day, ever taught me. It showed me how the tables could always turn and how delicate each and every one of us really was.

!

And so the day of my genin exams finally arrived. At this point I was technically a year too young, but they decided that there really was little point in my continuing on at the academy for another year as T&I really wanted me to get started on missions with Yoda. The stuffy Jedi left me at the training grounds and told me that he would come and collect me the next morning at the usual time so that we could begin the official partnership. I think he was trying to wish me good luck in an awkwardly unemotional way and so I gave him a hug and a heartfelt thank you.

After cleaning up from the training I met Neji at the front of the compound and we walked to the academy together. It was Neji's big day as well but I could tell that he wasn't at all concerned about whether or not he would pass. Neji knew, without a doubt, that he would pass these exams with flying colours. What he was nervous about, however, was that maybe he would get struck with a God awful genin team and be doomed to spend the rest of his existence with a bunch of morons.

I reassured him that he probably would be struck with at least one moron, but that hopefully said moron would help to remove that poll from up his arse that had been bothering him for a while.

He didn't talk to me for the rest of the walk to the school.

When we got there I headed to my usual classroom to meet up with all my friends before the exam. As you can imagine they were all pretty pissed that I was going to be the first to become a ninja when they still all had one year of schooling left.

"But it's not fair," pouted Naruto.

"Yeah, well, it's only so that I can get an in depth education in how to interrogate people. So there's not really any point in me staying at school," I reasoned to the irritated blonde.

"I know that," he mumbled in reply like a spoilt child. "But I wanna be a ninja too!" I shook my head in despair and decided that I should lower myself to his level to cheer the poor boy up.

"It's just because I'm strong than you," I said flippantly. Of course his reaction was predictable.

"What!? No you're not! I'm stronger than you and I'm going to be Hokage one day!" Naruto yelled at the top of his voice. No one paid him any attention though as they were used to the blond declaring his ambitions on a daily basis.

"I hate to say this but I agree with the dobe. You graduating early is unfair," Sasuke walked into the classroom with his usual strut and placed his bag on one of the desks at the back.

"Shut up teme!" Naruto screamed at the Uchiha from force of habit. It was kind of their morning ritual that they would get into a fight instead of a simple "Hey, you alright?"

"Are you stupid? I just said I agreed with you," sneered Sasuke at the jinchuuriki.

"Yeah, well it could have done without the attitude," said Naruto as he curled his fists ready to strike out at his rival. Before he could, however, he was struck on the head by the class's top kunoichi.

"Don't speak to Sasuke-kun like that!" said Sakura with a dark glint in her eye.

"But Sakura-chan…!" said Naruto clutching his now aching head and looking up at the ranging pink haired youth with fear. The girl merely flicked her hair over her shoulder as if she was brushing off a particularly annoying fly, and walked over to Sasuke attempting to act casual. However before she could get there, said boy was already surrounded by his usual fan girls reassuring him that Naruto was an idiot and that he, Sasuke, was really cool.

"Oh Sasuke-kun!"

"You don't need to speak to that loser."

"We're here for you!"

I sniggered into my hands as I watched the young boy get swallowed in a sea of prepubescent girls. Sakura stood watching the crowd for a moment in shock and then slumped her shoulders, returning to her seat at the front of the class. I spared a glance in Ino's direction, who was one of the many girls currently harassing Sasuke, and caught sight of her looking after Sakura with a sad expression. However, when she saw me watching her it changed to a cheery smile and she abandoned her futile flirting to come and wish me good luck.

"You're coming to the Akimichi's barbecue restaurant tonight?" asked the blond with an endearing smile. "Choji and Shikamaru are going to be there with their families and my dad's making me go. But it wouldn't be so bad if you went."

"I'm sorry, I can't come. Its tradition in my clan for when a member becomes a ninja to have a formal meal," I told the girl with a bitter taste in my mouth. I hated Hyuuga formal dinners as they were tedious and boring, and not to mention the kimono's they made us wear were ridiculously uncomfortable.

"Too bad, it would be so much more fun with you. Well I'll see you round I guess! There's no doubt you'll pass so I feel a good luck is wasted on you." Ino gave me one of her breath taking smiles that would one day break many a man's heart, and then she turned around and went to sit down. Sasuke's fan club had stopped harassing him and so, seeing Ino's retreating form, the boy calmly walked up to me, stood on my left and continued the conversation as if we had had no interruptions. "I mean, you're nothing special. You don't even have the Byakugan."

"And isn't that lucky for you," I mumbled sarcastically under my breath, too low for Sasuke to hear.

"What?" sneered the Uchiha.

"I said you're just jealous!"

"I'm not jealous of someone like you."

"Are you sure? Your face seems slightly tinted green."

"That's because I'm sick of looking at your ugly face."

"Well you won't have to look at it much longer as I'm going to be a Ninja and you still have one year left at the academy." I stuck my tongue out at Sasuke with a wink and he just spluttered and crossed his arms over his chest with a pout. Getting Sasuke to pout was always one of my favourite past times.

As painful as it is for me to say this; Sasuke and I were friends. The friendship mainly consisted of snide remarks and biting comments, but, as Shikamaru put it, it was how we showed our love for each other. Neither Shikamaru nor I had mentioned to Sasuke our theory that we could one day be wed; in fact we hadn't mentioned it to anyone nor had we hardly talked about it in the last few years. It really was as if it was put to the back of our minds. I was friends with Sasuke because I liked the boy and no other reason than that; if it so happened that we were one day forced to wed then at least we were friends.

But really, the Sasuke I knew was completely different from the person from the series all those years ago. The reason for that being the most obvious thing in the world; the Uchiha massacre. Sasuke was a moody and relatively normal twelve year old that wasn't hell bent on getting revenge for his slaughtered clan.

Said Uchiha pulled me out of my thoughts with his next few words.

"Whatever, I'll see you round. Try not to do anything stupid in your test." Sasuke walked off back to his seat and I was left standing there, blinking after his retreating form. He had just wished me luck in his very own messed up way, bless him.

But saying that, what was it with my friends and their inability to communicate good will?

"Thanks Sasuke-kun!" I called to him. "I'll try my best!" I witnessed as his ears glowed bright red, but apart from that he gave no indication that he had actually heard me.

Shikamaru and Choji, as you can imagine, were the most supporting out of all my friends and made me promise that we would still be close friends even if we didn't see each other all the time.

"I'm going to miss you in class Nana," said Choji, "but we'll still be friends and you know you are welcome at the Akimichi's anytime. It's just a shame you can't come tonight for a goodbye meal."

"You make it sound like I'm leaving the Village. Anyway, this is all on the grounds of whether I pass or not you know," I said wistfully.

"Yeah, but you will pass," Shikamaru reassured half-heartedly. "Dam, it's going to be such a drag staying friends with you." The young Nara laid his head on his desk and began to pretend none of us were there.

"It'll be a drag to stay my friend, huh?" I mumbled in a menacing voice, one that I knew caused Shikamaru to go on edge. Ever since training with Inoichi I had been trying out my some of my interrogation techniques on my friends. However; Choji was too sweet, Naruto to dense and Sasuke to violent. Therefore, the job was usually left to the Nara heir. Because of this he had built up somewhat of immunity to my scary charm, just like Yoda, but if I played my cards right…

Shikamaru looked up as he registered the change in my tone.

"I-I didn't… what I meant to say was… Nana I…" The Nara suddenly went very white, gave me an unsure glare, and then once again rested his head on the desk in a defeated manor as if to say that the world had just gotten too much for the poor boy.

I laughed and gave him a hard slap on the back. "Don't worry about it Shikamaru! I will make sure that we remain friends to the end of time." For some reason the young genius didn't seem reassured by this idea.

The exam lasted all day, what with the different skill sets we had to demonstrate and all the papers the sensei's had to mark. But both Neji and I walked out of that building at the end with Konoha head bands in our hands and self-satisfied expressions on our faces.

!

That night I sat in an extremely uncomfortable dress around one of the many very well decorated tables in the presence of my entire clan. Neji and I were on the head table along with Hizashi, Hinata and Hanabi as the event was in honour of our graduation.

It all felt very forced and formal and I wanted to cry from the sheer awkwardness of the entire evening. For the most I chatted quietly with Hinata and Neji, as I was sat between them, and barely touched the too rich, too dry meal that had been prepared for us. I tried to get the two cousins to talk politely with one another but when Hinata tried to address Neji he would just reply with one word answers in a clipped and cold tone.

This, of course, caused me to try and kick my brother very hard from under the table. However, instead of feeling my foot connect with Neji's shin, I heard the gentle sound of material tearing. I froze as the sound reach my ears, and prayed that I was the only one to notice. However, as luck would have it, I was not.

"Nanami-san?" asked Hinata in a concerned voice. I looked at my cousin and brother; my eyes shining with laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation. _What was I going to do now? _Neji stared back at me like I was a class A idiot and in this one look made it quite clear that this was my issue alone to deal with; I would receive no pity from him. This just made me wink at my brother cheeky, which in turn made him shake his head and return to his meal.

Before I could begin to brain storm about how I could resolve this situation subtly I turned around and met the completely unamused, not-funny-in-the-slightest, never-laughed-in-his-life, expression of my father – who was only on the other side of Hinata.

And I knew he had heard the ripping of my kimono. His dead expression gave me shivers up my spine and somewhere in the back of my mind I made myself a mental note to ask him how he did that expression so effectively. I swallowed a lump that had formed in my throat and looked down at my lap shamefully.

"Hyuuga-sama, may I be excused?" I asked my father in a rather squeaky voice.

"I think that would be best," came the cold reply. I felt my face glowing bright red under my father's glare and so quickly exited the room in an extremely awkward fashion to try and make it unobvious that I had damaged my clothing. I got a few odd looks but thankfully I was seated near the door and so slipped out quietly and quickly

When I got back to my room I cracked a smile at the situation, knowing that in life it was always best to laugh at the little things. I removed my silly dress and flung it on the floor in relief and reached for night clothes, but as I did my stomach grumbled in protest, as I hadn't really touched my meal. Now this would not do at all. I paused for a moment as a brilliant idea came to mind and a smile spread across my face.

!

The Akimichi clan's restaurant was alive with laughter and drinks as three of the Konoha's most joyous clans came together and shared in each other's company. The rowdy atmosphere left for quiet conversations to go unnoticed and so when a small eleven year old walked in and made her way through the crowd, only a few even acknowledged her presence.

"Hmm, isn't that Nanami? I thought Choji said she couldn't make it?" said Akimichi Choza in confusion.

"The Hyuuga have that clan thing," confirmed the Nara Shikaku.

"Looks like she got out of it somehow though," laughed Yamanaka Inoichi. "I have taught her well."

"Knowing her she probably did it by accident," commented the Nara. "She's not the most strategic after all. More run in, ninjutsu blazing."

"Or rather genjutsu as she really is horrendously bad at Ninjutsu. I've taught her a few useful genjutsu and she's quite proficient at them. Not Kurenai standards but she'll be pretty good at them none the less." Inoichi looked over to his student once again and watched as his daughter pounced on the young Hyuuga in relief at having another girl present. Inoichi chuckled to himself before turning back to his friends and sake.

"Shikamaru, Choji and Nanami are pretty good friends," observed Shikaku while nursing his alcohol lovingly as if life was just simply too much effort. "I know Shikamaru was disappointed when he found out Nanami was going to graduate early. He wanted the three of them to be on a genin team together; although he'll never admit that."

"It was always going to be another Ino-Shika-Cho genin team," said Choza with a nostalgic smile. "Though no doubt Ino and Shikamaru will end up working in the T&I department anyway with their skills."

"Sometimes I feel that Shikamaru is even more intelligent than me," mumbled the elder Nara. "I think that's why him and Nanami get on so well."

"I know what you mean." Inoichi took a swig of sake and sighed in relief. "Sometimes I feel like Nana's thirty instead of eleven," commented the Yamanaka clan head with a frown. "Man, what I would do to get in that tiny little head of hers."

"I wonder what she knows that is so important that the Hokage himself asked you not to use your mind reading jutsu on her." Shikaku looked over his shoulder at the dark haired youth with a frown. That she had information that even he, the Jonin commander, didn't know meant very serious business.

"It's weird not knowing. Whenever I've had trainees with me in the past I've always had a look inside their head, with their permission of course, so that I knew exactly what to do with them. But with Nana…" Inoichi discarded the tiny cup and just grabbed the sake bottle and took a swig.

"It is a shame about the marriage though," muttered Shikaku with a shake of his head.

"Well you were the only one out of the three of us to approach the Hyuuga about the possibility of marriage…" Inoichi raised his eyebrows suggestively, which in return only caused the Nara to roll his eyes at his friend's childish behaviour. "I should have asked as well."

"Why in the world would you have approached them Inoichi?" Choza asked with confusion. "Ino's a girl."

"Yeah, well, you never know these days." The mind reader gave the two men a wink and finished off the bottle in one smooth motion.

Shikaku gave his friend a hesitant look before continuing, "The Nara clan don't really do that kind of thing usually, as it's much too troublesome to organise. But I know what good friends the two kids are and thought that it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for them. Shame the Hyuuga said no." The Nara head looked over to his son and cracked a smile as he watched Nanami poke and prod Shikamaru to try and get a rise. "I'm rather fond of the girl and I know of the… other options that were available for the child."

Choza and Inoichi immediately sobered up. Choza lowered his voice as he spoke. "You mean…?"

"We all know what's been happening with the Uchiha as of late. That could be the reason that the Hyuuga haven't announced the engagement to the rest of the village. Whether or not they announce it the marriage would still be extremely beneficial for both parties." The Nara lent forward on the table and bowed his head thoughtfully.

"So it's definitely Uchiha?" whispered Inoichi; concern lacing his features.

"It's more than likely," said Shikaku with the same worried eyes. "I wouldn't be surprised if it was the Hokage himself who dictated the marriage to calm the conflict."

"She'll be fine," said the Akimichi clan head with genuine conviction. "She's a tough one to crack. I'm sure she'll handle whatever they throw at her."

Shikaku and Inoichi nodded in agreement and the topic of conversation was changed to more light hearted talk. Nanami sat with her friends, not in the slightest aware of the conversation that had just taken place. This was probably best as she had enough to think about as it was.

Tomorrow was her first day as a Ninja.

And she was ready.

!

**Thank you for all your lovely feedback! I'm over the moon that so many of you like this story :D **

**First with the time skip. I didn't want to add in unnecessary narrative that drags the story on and isn't really relative. I love speech and character interaction if you haven't already guessed and I wanted to get the ball rolling and get into some real interesting arcs. At this point we still don't know Yoda enough but I hope you got a general idea of his personality from this chapter and what their team dynamics will be like. Should prove interesting I think!**

**Right, Inoichi. He might not be typically what he was portrayed as in the Manga but it kind of just flowed like that and proved entertaining. Very good at what he does but a bit of a joker and a light hearted man. I hope you enjoyed reading him as much as I enjoyed writing him.**

**I will try to keep you on your toes. Be warned though as some things you will see coming and others you will be surprised at! Got to have a nice balance of both after all.**

**Another nice long chapter for you and I hope you enjoyed it. I am extremely sorry about the poor spelling and grammar! (If there are any major, embarrassing flaws I won't be offended if you point them out to me. For all of you who have already done this I thank you!)**

**Thanks again and I look forward to hearing your feedback! Until next time… **


	10. Chapter 10

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 10

_"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he doesn't exist." - The Usual Suspects_

_"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." - Helen Keller_

_!_

For my first day as a genin I decided to dress casually with a pair of black Ninja pants and a grey tanktop. However, I felt that as a hyuuga I should at least have a little bit of class and so pulled a dark blue blazer out from the bottom of my chest of draws. I placed my hair in its usual up-down style with the ribbon that had been graced to me by my brother all those years ago. With my new ninja headband I put it around my neck so that the metal plate sat comfortably in the grove of my collarbone and the knot at the back perfectly hid my curseseal. With both my hair and my headband someone would have a lot of difficulty discovering that particular deep, dark secret imprinted on my skin.

Then I set off for the first time into the real world of shinobi.

I met Yoda at the practise field and we made our way over to the Hokage tower together.

"No training today then?" I asked the teen curiously.

"Not today," replied Yoda in his usual matter-of-fact tone. "Ibiki asked that you and I report to him as soon as we are able."

When we reached the tower we headed into the deep recesses of the building and into the T&I unit. Once we had unlocked the seal and passed the security check we headed to Ibiki's office. We found him in a mountain of paper work and grumbling over how useless his assistants were. When we entered the room he put down his pen and leaned back in his chair.

"Congratulation Nanami, you are now a genin. I will be your official Jonin-sensei, but because you've been placed in a particular unit, things are going to run a little differently than they might usually. Right so as you are both now an official team you each need to have a simple medical examination to make sure you are completely fit and able to be a shinobi for the torture and interrogation unit," said Ibiki casually. "Yoda if you go down the hall and the third door on the left. Nanami you'll have to go over to the general hospital for your check up."

"What? why?"

"I don't know; don't ask stupid questions or you'll never go far in this unit. It's a request from your clan, so we have to follow it." Ibiki dismissed us so that we could go and get the check over and done with. So I left the Hokage tower and made my way to Konoha's hospital.

I entered the building and approached the front desk. They immediately pointed me down the hall and instructed me to wait outside examination room 38. So I did just that. Hardly five minutes later I heard a shout from the other side of the said door for me to go in.

"Nanami. How are you?" asked a familiar deep voice as I walked into the room. Mikata hadn't changed in the slightest over the last few years apart from a few more grey hairs and worry lines, but his stoic composure and professional atmosphere were the same. I smiled up at the man genuinely.

"I'm not too bad. And yourself?" I asked the medic as I jumped up and sat on the bed he was gesturing to.

"As well as an old man can be," said the man as he began to check me over with medical ninjutsu.

"You're hardly that old Mikata-sama," I commented lightly.

"Hmm," he replied with a disinterested air. He continued on the rest of the examination in silence as he concentrated fully on his work. It was an hour of tedious weight and height checks as well as some blood tests and even a pregnancy test.

"You know I haven't even hit puberty yet, right?" I asked the man laughingly.

He glanced at me with amusement. "Are you sure you are your father's daughter? Hizashi doesn't have a sense of humour."

"I think Neji was the one who picked up that particular attribute," I commented with a found smile.

He jotted down some notes and then paused. His hesitance caught my attention and I was immediately on edge. "There is one last thing I have to do," mumbled the medic with a look of distaste.

"What do you need to do?" I asked him lightly despite the fact I had a feeling I knew the answer.

"Because of your difficulty with chakra manipulation I need to check that the placement of the seal hasn't had any long term effects on your chakra coils." He moved to stand behind me and instructed me to lift up my hair. I did what he said but when Mikata didn't do anything for a few moments I turned to him questioningly. When I caught sight of the dark look fixated on my back I understood.

"It's alright," I told him gently.

"To inflict the caged bird-seal on his own daughter… I cannot even comprehend the idea," he said mostly to himself. His voice was gentle but with underlying anger. He cared about Hizashi and despaired as he watched him make the wrong choices for the 'good of his clan'. "Hizashi hated the Hyuuga clan for what they did to him. His bitterness could rival even an Uchiha's. He told me how he was ready to die for his brother but they were even able to take that freedom away from him." Mikata shook his head as if trying to dislodge a particularly unpleasant memory.

There was a heavy silence in the room as Mikata looked over the seal and then my chakra coils with a medical eye. I could feel his disapproval at the curse seal practically rolling off of him but he said no more on the subject and I didn't question him.

"You have gotten better with your chakra," he noted as he turned and wrote his findings down on a clipboard. "That is all you are needed for."

I bowed to the elder man respectfully and thanked him for all his help.

"I will be your doctor from now on if you are submitted to hospital. I hope I do not see you often," said the man dryly. I cracked a hesitant smile and waved him goodbye.

I think I liked Mikata; I could tell he was a good man.

!

As soon as I left Mikata I went back to find Ibiki. I almost wished I hadn't.

Yoda and I were instructed to fill out some paper work – and when I say some I mean a hell of a lot of paper work. This took us a good few hours and when we were finished Ibiki told us to just go home and that we would start working properly tomorrow. So we headed out of the Hokage tower and down the streets of Konoha.

"You fancy doing some training, Jedi?" I asked my partner absently. He agreed to my suggestion and so we both headed off to our usual training grounds. When we got there, however, we found that it was already occupied by none-other than team Gai.

All three of the members of said team were sprawled out across the floor in exhaustion. As Yoda and I approached the team I saw Neji lift his head a little to see whom it was that dared to disturb them. When he saw it was I he sat up and gave me a questioning look.

"Hey Neji, how was your first day as a genin? Did you pass your genin test?" I asked him with a wide smile. His face immediately darkened at my words and I could practically feel the anger rolling off of him.

"You knew that we would get a test, and yet you did not warn me?" he asked in a menacing voice. Oh, Neji was pissed off. I mean really pissed off. My smile dropped off my face and I blinked in surprise. I had completely forgotten that the second genin test was not a well-known thing amongst academy students, and everybody would have just found out about it that morning. I took a step back as I realized my mistake.

"I'm so sorry! I completely forgot to tell you. I-" I stopped talking as Neji stood up and faced me with an extremely dark look on his face.

"Come here Nanami," said my brother in exactly the same commanding tone as my father.

"No," I told him wisely and took another step back. At my reaction he took a step forward.

"Nanami." Neji's voice held deep warning and my instincts were telling me to run.

"Neji?" I asked in a politely questioning voice. Neji went to take another step forward but his legs collapsed beneath him and he lay on the floor grimacing. I walked up to him hesitantly and looked down at my brother with pity.

"Your new sensei a bit of a slave driver?" I asked him sympathetically.

"You have no idea," said the girl lying on Neji's right. Tenten was exactly like I remembered her from my past life, with buns on either side of her head and a pretty face. I gave her an understanding look as she breathed out a hard-done-by smile.

"Yosh!" came a voice on Neji's left. "He was the perfect example of hard work and determination! I would very much like to be like that someday." Rock Lee did not yet possess the bright green jump suit and so was currently wearing normal Ninja clothing. I gave the boy a bright smile, a wink and a thumbs-up.

"That's the spirit!" I told at him.

"No…" Neji moaned from the floor. "Don't encourage him."

With Neji's words Lee jumped up into the air, as if he hadn't just be passed out from exhaustion and approached me with enthusiasm. "Yosh! It is nice to meet you. I am Rock Lee and you are…?"

"I'm Hyuuga Nanami; Neji's younger sister," I told the boy calmly.

"It is an honour to meet the sister of my esteemed team mate and rival Neji-san!" yelled the boy while bowing to me.

"Rival?" I asked Neji over my shoulder, stifling a giggle behind my hand.

"I hate you," Neji mumbled into the dirt.

"So you passed anyway?" I questioned in all seriousness.

"Don't ask stupid questions," replied my brother with an annoyed look in my direction.

"Is it such a stupid question?" asked Tenten. "I mean, that was pretty brutal. I'm surprised we even came out of it alive. I'm Tenten by the way, it's nice to meet you. I would get up but I'm not sure that I can."

Yoda just watched the whole exchange with polite interest without anybody even noticing his presence, but I think he found the whole situation secretly hilarious – but that's just my theory. Later that evening, after Yoda and I had completed a particularly gruelling training session, I walked back home with a smile on my face. I thought with relief that I was glad I hadn't somehow changed the outcome of Neji's genin team. They would be good for him.

!

The first month of being a Shinobi was… dull. Apparently D-rank missions were a rite of passage in the Shinobi world. We were given missions that the rest of the T&I department couldn't be bothered or didn't want to do. These were things like coffee runs, cleaning out the used Torture chambers of all the blood and gore and watching interrogations through the one way mirror and writing down what was said and done. Yoda didn't once complain about what they had to do and just took everything with a nod and got on with it.

We didn't always just observe interrogation; we actually sometime did them ourselves. Of course the first few times were with supervision from Ibiki, but once we had got the hang of it he left us to our own devices. Of course, we were only allowed to do the simplest interrogations such as taking reports from failed low C-rank missions that weren't important enough to go to the Hokage, or looking into complaints from civilians about rowdy Shinobi. This meant that I would usually do most of the talking while Yoda sat there looking blank and slightly intimidating.

"So you killed his cat because…?" I asked a particularly disgruntled Inuzuka genin; one of Kiba's distant cousins.

"Because the dammed cat attacked my dogs," said the young man without any remorse. "It was to protect my canine friends."

"Your dogs would have been fine. They are, after all, five times the size of an average cat." I flicked my pen and pursed my lip with a sigh; not even trying to hide my boredom with the situation.

"It's principle," justified the Inuzuka.

"On a civilian's cat?"

"One hundred percent."

"Because it scratched your dog's nose."

"Deadly attack that."

"Slight over reaction, maybe?" I asked in a casual tone.

"Not at all," replied the man with complete seriousness.

"Right…" I took a deep breath and rubbed my hand over my face tiredly. Sometimes it was hard to believe how incredibly stupid some people were. "You've been issued with a warning and must compensate said Mr… err, Fluffykins-"

"I think that was the cat's name," muttered Yoda under his breath.

I stopped short with a frown. "Why is it on the paper work then!?" I whispered back in an incredulous tone.

"Well probably because-" continued my partner as if he couldn't detect the killer intent that was sure to have been radiating off me at this point.

"I will hit you," I cut him off. He made no comment in return.

I finished off that particular soul destroying interrogation shortly after that. My temper was only so short.

"Aren't you going to get bored of just doing D-ranks all the time? I mean _I'm_ fine with it because I have no experience with this type of thing. But you were kind of ANBU before," I said to Yoda as we took a seat at a ramin stand at the end of a long day two weeks in. I had insisted that Yoda treat me to a bowl of ramin after he had flicked blood in my face that afternoon while we cleaned up after a particularly gruesome interrogation. He said it was by accident but I caught a gleam in his eye as he turned away from me. It seemed I had rubbed off on the teen and it turned out that he had a slight mischievous side.

"No, I don't mind," he said genuinely with a small smile.

"And why's that?" I asked. Our bowls of ramin arrived and I began to dig in to my meal greedily.

"Well, you need the experience. Throwing you in the deep end would be stupid. I don't mind going at your pace; we're friends." Yoda looked down at his meal and frowned, as if he wasn't sure what he just said was the truth or not. I couldn't help it, my heart swelled as I watched the socially dysfunctional boy try and express his feelings to me.

"Thanks Yoda, it means a lot," I said smiling and giving my friend a wink. He just frowned at me.

"Are you being sarcastic?" he asked with suspicion. The cute moment suddenly disappeared due to the sandy haired boy's obliviousness. I just gave him a dead stare and turned back to my food.

!

Six months later we found ourselves much more experienced in the art of interrogation and with this we started to receive more and more difficult missions. Yoda's particular skills started to become in handy when we had overly difficult suspects and with this I had to completely squash any squeamishness I might have previously had. The first time I witnessed my partner break someone's arm and watched as it splinted and broke through the victims skin; I was sick. It was embarrassing and Yoda out right laughed at my discomfort but following that I managed to suck it up and deal with all the gruesome situations.

In addition to interrogation and torture, the department also dealt with a lot of undercover missions. Manipulation being a key component of any spies job, T&I often were the first the Hokage would look to for any missions where a detailed, fake alias needed to be created and where shinobi who were to be on long term assignments of said nature were trained on how to stay in character.

Although Yoda and I weren't going to be running round other hidden villages pretending to be enemy shinobi any time soon, once we were trusted more within T&I we were sent out on a few said missions – albeit the lesser ones. Just simple 'get information in a bar pretending to be an innocent child kid on the boarders of Wind' or 'quietly suggest something sinister to a high member of a local government while pretending to be a servant' kind of missions. Very easy for those with the skills and with the know-how.

What was surprising, or somewhat not when you think about it, is that not every shinobi knew the finesse of lying and sabotage to gain advantage. A lot of ninja were the melee kind of fighters, 'kill loads of guys, guns blazing' routine, like Naruto. If you really think about it Naruto could not, in his whole existence, have completed an undercover mission without revealing who he was. So best to call in the experts, or higher-ranking shinobi, to do such tasks.

All in all we were good at our job and everything was running smoothly. However, I couldn't seem to brush away the feeling that everything was going too smoothly and that we would soon be crashing and burning spectacularly.

"Yoda! Hyuuga!" Ibiki barked and beckoned us to walk with him. "I've got an interrogation for you." We followed our sensei into his office and stood in front of his desk as he took a seat and took out a number of mission files.

"It's not another civilian matter is it?" I asked in a pouty voice.

"You'll get what you're given and be grateful," Morino said gruffly but with clear amusement. "But even I have to admit that the amount of civilian cases we've been receiving has increased a lot recently. Most of those should have been dealt with by the police force."

"They haven't been able to keep up with demands?" asked Yoda with a critical eye.

"The inter-clan conflict within the Uchiha has completely messed their system up and they're going with a reorganisation phase. And so they've been passing some of their work load onto us." Ibiki shook his head in silent despair at the huge amount of extra work that had managed to come his way. "Well anyway, this mission I have for you isn't a pass over from the police force. It's simply a suspect, Chunin, called up on the street for odd behaviour." Ibiki pulled out a mission report from the bottom of his pile and handed it to Yoda. "It shouldn't be too difficult for you two. Just find out what he's hiding whether it be undiagnosed psychotics or forbidden jutsu."

Seemed routine enough. It wasn't something that Yoda and I had handled before but it wasn't way out of our league. I was about to express my confidence when I caught an uncertain expression creeping across Ibiki's face.

"What's the catch?" I asked with dread.

He paused and sat back in his chair and watched us with calculated eyes. He seemed to be debating something with himself silently. "There's something about him that feels more sinister than simply mucking around with a few techniques he maybe shouldn't have. Its just…"Ibiki drifted off with a slightly sour expression. "You'll see what I mean when you get in there I suppose. Any questions?" Plenty considering Ibiki hadn't given us much to go off and yet both Yoda and I shook our heads violently, recognising the rhetorical question for what it was.

A nasty grin spread across Ibiki's face and I felt a cold chill run up my spin in anticipation. "Good luck ladies."

Something about the hesitance in Ibiki's eyes made me pause for a second when Yoda and I were alone.

"Yoda, I have a bad feeling…" my gut was telling me to run. That was never a good sign.

"We will be fine." He wasn't saying that as if to reassure me, but as if it was an empirical fact. Everything would be fine and we would come out of this better than we did before - with more experience.

!

_The chunin in the chair looked worse for wear and smelt equally as vile. His chakra gave off an unpleasant pulse as it tried to make its way around the suppression seals taped to his arms. Something volatile seemed to be leaking from his whole aura that caused me to suppress a gag at the pure sickening feeling it riled up within me._

_Something was off about this man; no wonder they had pulled him up merely off the street in suspicion for dirty dealings. When I saw him, however, I thought it went deeper than that. He was tainted with something rotten. It was as if someone had poisoned him._

_I gave Yoda a look that communicated my suspicions and he seemed to agree. So this is what Ibiki had meant when he told us we'd understand when we saw him. He wants us to get a name because, whatever this was, this low level chunin wasn't alone._

_We shared another look, but this time it was one of confidence. This would be fine, we could get the answers; we could do this!_

_We hoped._

!

It didn't go fine. It actually went as horribly wrong as any interrogation in the history of the Shinobi nations ever went.

I sat in the medical bay cradling my broken arm in despair. The medic flittered around me with practised professionalism, not saying a word, and as soon as the bone was set and a small amount of medical chakra inserted into the wound to speed up the healing process we were ushered out to be replaced by the next person. We sat in the small office that had been given to us to share with our heads bowed and the silence between us deafening. We had gained the information but we had broken protocol a million times over.

"Was that your first?" I asked Yoda, maybe trying to take my mind off of the shit storm of an interrogation or maybe because I realized that I had just watched a man die for the first time and it really didn't bother me.

"No," was Yoda's answer. And I left it at that.

"Yoda and Hyuuga in my office NOW!" shouted Morino Ibiki as he walked past our office door very, very unhappily. We got up and followed the man silently. "What do you have to say for yourselves?" sneered Ibiki as he lent over his desk in an extremely agitated pose. We wisely remained silent and just stood in front of our sensei with shamefully.

"I know that you completed the interrogation but at what cost? A broken arm that could have been avoided and a dead chunin that we could have found more information from. Not well done. Not well done at all." He paused and tried to look us in the eye but we avoided his gaze expertly.

"Yoda," barked our sensei.

"Sir," came the reply from my partner, albeit much quieter than usual.

"Tell me exactly what you did wrong."

"I killed the suspect," Yoda said in a dead voice.

"That is right, you did. But that can be dealt with easily enough. More importantly; what did you do wrong?" Ibiki's tone spoke that he better get the answer right this time.

"I allowed my team mate to get hurt," Yoda whispered. I looked over to my friend and found that he wouldn't meet my eyes. His face was shrouded in darkness so I couldn't see his expression. My throat constricted painfully as I felt the dark aura. Had I not made the mistake and been over confident then Yoda wouldn't have to feel the pressing guilt that it was all his fault.

"I take full responsibility for what happened in that room," I said to the floor. Tears were pricking the corners of my eyes but I refused to let them fall; I would deal with my actions bravely. "I wouldn't allow Yoda to stop the Chunin from hurting me because I thought we could get the information I-"

"You are not experienced enough to make that call. If I thought you would end up in a situation like that I never would have given you that interrogation. You were stupid Nanami and I expect better from you." I flinched visibly at Ibiki's words. "But the fault lies with you both." I looked up and was about to argue my point when Yoda cut across me.

"No Nana, he's right. I'm sorry that I could not stop what happened. I shouldn't have let you get hurt." The sentence held more emotion than I had ever heard from my partner before. Guilt and shame laced his voice as he tried to hold in the unfamiliar fear of losing one of his only friends in the whole world.

"Yoda…" I whispered, my heart breaking as I felt the weight of his words. Guilt and horror settled into the pit of my stomach. I was such an idiot.

"Yoda and Nanami. Never do that again, do you understand me?" Ibiki said with more anger than I'd ever seen from him before. Yoda and I just nodded our heads in quick agreement. I was trying to wipe off any trace of emotion from my face and so was Yoda, but I could see the shame in my partner's eyes and was sure that my expression mirrored his.

"In that room," continued the head of T&I, "you never, ever allow yourself to lose control. You must always plan the situation and know the outcome. If you ever lose sight of that goal then you need to stop the interrogation and re-evaluate. We are not working on a battlefield. Our fights are significantly more refined and much, much slower." He stopped and looked at us with a piercing expression. "Remember this; you can always go back tomorrow.

"Sometimes you will have to make a sacrifice in that room. Sometimes, if the information isn't gathered then it could be the end for your village," said our sensei with a dead voice. "One day, you might have no other choice. But that is the only situation where you are allowed to become the victim in that room. Getting hurt is the last option. Always the last."

"We understand," Yoda muttered. This time there was a determined glint in his eye. I almost smiled.

"We all make mistakes," Ibiki said in a softer tone. "But what's important is to learn from them. You have tomorrow off. I want you to put the interrogation behind you and when you return the day after tomorrow I expect you in full working order." With these words Ibiki left the room in one swift movement and slammed the door behind him loudly. Both Yoda and I flinched at the noise but apart from that didn't move or say anything.

The silence was near suffocating as we both stood there awkwardly, lacking anything appropriate to say after the severe scolding and life lesson we had just receive. After a few moments of this I couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey Jedi, want to get some ramen with me?" the sudden question broke through the stillness like a breath of fresh air.

"That would be nice," replied Yoda in a timid voice.

_We all make mistakes, but what's important is to learn from them._ I would never allow myself to get into such a vulnerable position again without a contingency plan, and Yoda would never step back and allow me to get hurt for the sake of an interrogation.

_Remember this; you can always go back tomorrow._

!

_It didn't take us very long to unhinge him enough to get him to make a mistake. So he was a spy, but the question was for whom? What Yoda and I should have seen at this point was that this was well out of our league and we should go and get someone with more experience. Arrogance and overestimation of our abilities over shadowed logic however. _

_"I know you know something. You've been hinting at it for the last two hours. Why are you prolonging the inevitable? …Who are you working for?" I asked the beaten Chunin in the chair in front of me. I knew whom he was working for and it was blindly obvious to anyone in the know; his twitching demeanour, his irrational idealization of this master and the pure superiority complex surrounding him all pointed to the influence of one man. But I couldn't for all intents and purposes just come up with such a random theory with no apparent background. No one would take me seriously._

_But if this Chunin just gave me something, anything at all, then maybe, just maybe, I could create a link._

_Said Chunin spat in my face venomously but remained as closed lip as before. Something in this mans expression seemed unstable, not all there in the head. When I went to wipe the disgusting spit from my cheek a manic grin made its way onto the suspects face that morphed into an ugly sneer._

_The expression didn't last long however as Yodo grabbed hold of the chunin's hair and smashed his face against the table violently. "What did I say about being polite?" my partner whispered in the ear of the accused. The chunin said nothing. "Well then, shall I remind you?"_

_I remained stoic in the face of the chunin's screams, completely detached from the situation as I was supposed to be, and yet something had unnerved me in the suspects face. Something that should have warned me of what was to come._

!

Less than two days later we returned to work as instructed. We weren't initially sure of what the recuperations of our mishap would be, but when Ibiki started to bring it up when we reported in it wasn't all that surprising. However, the outcome of the conversation was not to have been expected.

"What happened with the chunin…" started Ibiki.

Neither Yoda nor I visibly flinched at the casual mention of the event but the tension in the room seemed to increase marginally from what it had only just been. "It was unfortunate but I still have faith in the both of you. The information you gathered was invaluable. And because of this we now have the upper hand and can use this to our advantage."

Hope welled up within me. If only the absolute humiliation of the whole event could be wiped clean and replaced with something of worth – and a feeling within me said that this was exactly what Ibiki was about to offer. And yet, another part of me knew that this salvation would be a double-edged sword.

"Word has gotten around about the dead chunin." Dead suspects was something that happened every once in a while and it was show of a good interrogation department that had fewer casualties and thus more refined shinobi - you leave the execution to the discretions of the Hokage. So therefore when a death did take place within the unit's walls it usually got around town that something underhand went about.

Mistakes happened; it would blow over soon enough…

"We're going to increase these rumours tenfold with Nanami at the centre," Ibiki had a self-satisfied smirk upon his face that said he had some unfortunate plan hidden somewhere up his sleeve.

…Or not.

!

_After the severe beating the suspect had received from Yoda we had both agreed it best that we move onto more psychological interrogation. Now Yoda was observing while I tried to trick the suspect into giving us useful answers._

_This hadn't been going very well unfortunately and half an hour later I was grinding my teeth in frustration and seriously considering passing the mantle back over to Yoda. I took a deep breath to calm myself and regrettably it was in this split second of inattention and indecision that everything began to go terribly wrong._

_I wasn't quite prepared for the chunin to reach out so suddenly and with such force. The impact of his hand on my arm from across the table and the jolt as he pulled me to my feet, dragging me forward to mere inches from his face, caused me to cry out in alarm and pain. I dared not move but just watched him like a gazelle caught in the gaze of a lion. _

_The suspect looked deranged as he held onto my arm with strength that one wouldn't have thought his average frame could possess. His hold was painful and I knew that there would at least be bruising there tomorrow. Yoda took a step forward from where he had retired against the wall at the back of the room. I shot him a look that communicated, "I got this", and trusting my judgement he stepped down._

_"Look at me," hissed the man. When I looked him in the eye I saw an unnerving predatory gleam that unsettled me to the core – I felt like I was losing control._

_In that moment a red-flag shot up in my brain and told me I needed to step back and revaluate. That Yoda was on standby and would be more than happy to take over in my moment of unease. Maybe it was that all-famous stubborn, Hyuuga pride that made me ignore the little voice and continue._

!

"I've been informed of your operation within you unit and the need for my cooperation," Hizashi stated with clear detachment. "I have complied with the request of your gradual ostracisation from the clan."

"Is anyone else going to know?" I asked my father with a grimace. I wasn't particularly fond of their stuffy rituals and the like but the Hyuuga's were my family and the idea of being outcast by them didn't sit well with me.

"I was told to tell as few people as possible. It is not necessary for anyone else to know; the clan will follow my lead." The words were said with a bitter resonance that was all too familiar with Hizashi's tone. He didn't like this but understanding the absolute need for this mission he accepted the request.

I was dismissed and that was that.

That afternoon everyone had heard about how I had failed in my duties as a shinobi and botched an important mission. I was in disgrace.

I don't know why but I didn't see Neji's reaction coming – or being quite so violent.

!

_"I'm looking at you," I said with blankness in my tone. Although I was unsettled, I didn't lose my cool._

_"Who you see before you is the disciple of a great man," hissed the chunin in a strangely familiar way._

_"A great man you say?" I questioned with disinterest that caused the suspect to sneer in anger._

_"Show him more respect!" he shouted unnecessarily as our faces were still mere inches apart. His grip on my arm didn't let up in the slightest but actually became more painful. So much so I imaged the bone straining under such constant force._

_"Who? Why would I show a stranger respect?" I would have liked to say you couldn't here the fear in my voice from where I was trying to block out the pain; but I would be lying. It was so obvious that even Yoda picked up on it. I saw from the corner of my eye him slowly stand straighter and take a fraction of a step forward just in case._

_"A person of legend. Our village will be top of everyone soon enough."_

!

"Neji?" I slid the door to my brother's room open slowly. There was no moon and so the light flittering through the halls was the bare minimum, meaning I could hardly see two feet in front of me. This was good for me because it meant my brother couldn't see the tear tracks racing down my cheeks. "Are you awake?"

I had had a nightmare, something that had been troubling me every single night since the interrogation. It had been a week since the event and it wasn't until had had gotten home that evening that the true horrors of the situation had really hit home.

I could have died. But that itself wasn't the scariest thought; I had already died once after all. What was most haunting was that I knew I would have to put myself in a situation like that again and I really, really didn't want to. I had decided to become a ninja because I didn't think I could get out of it and I only saw the benefits of the job, but now all I could think about was the face of the man I was partly responsible for killing. Not only that but his deranged words echoed in my subconscious every time I closed my eyes.

I was a fully-grown woman deep down despite how often I acted like a child. But I was unnerved to the bone. This wasn't the society I came from where murder was wrong and war was something that happened half way across the world where it couldn't reach us. I had never felt more like a child before; vulnerable, exposed and helpless. The reality check wasn't pretty.

I really, really needed a hug.

I couldn't ask Yoda as his hugs were like hugging a lamppost, so I would have to ask my brother; someone who had always been there for me. However, I hadn't even seen him around the compound since the day of my failed interrogation and that, for some reason, stirred a disconcerting feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Neji?" I asked the darkness.

"Go back to your own bed Nanami," Neji said with a clear voice as if he hadn't been sleeping. There was something in his voice that I should have pinpointed, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Whatever it was it unnerved me and I began to question the wisdom of disturbing my brother in the middle of the night.

But he had never turned me away when I really needed him, so I didn't think to worry.

"I had a nightmare. Just for a little bit can I-" I was cut off abruptly with a loud bang, as if a fist was banging on the floor.

"You're a shinobi now Nanami you shouldn't come crying to me when you have a problem!" seethed my brother with venom. I staggered backwards surprised and hurt by his cold tone. "You look pathetic standing there. Go away and don't bother me."

"I don't understand," I whispered in confusion.

"I heard what happened. You're an embarrassment to the clan. Please have a little bit of pride and at least not bother others with your whimpering." Neji's voice was cold and sincere and it hurt more than I could have imagined. And for the first time in quite a while I felt totally alone.

I felt a sob rising from my chest and I made no effort to stop it. I was so hurt by his words I didn't care. I ran from the room and would have been blinded by tears had it not already been so dark.

Neji didn't speak to me much after that. Ever. I tried to get him to open up to me again but he just closed me off absolutely and completely. I did once catch him giving me a guilty glance but when I looked again it was all cold indifference. I thought that maybe he was doing this because I needed to become stronger and he thought that my emotional attachments were weaknesses as a shinobi. I was probably right in my assessment, as I knew everything my brother did went regarding me was to try and make me stronger.

None the less we became strangers and he became consumed in his training and his career.

He didn't have time for me anymore.

!

_Frustration was gnawing at me as the impertinent man gave us less and less coherent answers._

_"'Our village?' What village is that?" I asked through gritted teeth. I wanted to get control again and was trying to collect in all the training I'd ever gone through and win this messed up situation._

_"The Village, our village," mumbled the mad man again and again. His breath had quickened and with his hand around my wrist I could feel his whole body shaking with tension. His grip didn't slacken at all as the man began to drift into his own world again._

_"Who? I want to know WHO?!" I slammed my free hand on the table with genuine frustration and emotion I couldn't remember feeling in years. I was stupidly letting myself go and a voice in the back of my mind was surprise Yoda hadn't stepped in yet, but after hours and hours of patient questioning in that small room on the brink of potentially nipping a big, big problem in the bud early and not getting anywhere, I really was desperate._

_The slamming of my fist seemed to reawaken the man and he came back to himself._

_"He's the medic," he sneered. "His _personal _medic." The chunin spat to his side to show his disgust and jealousy. There was only one medic this could be._

_"What's his name?" I pushed. Ignoring the growing discomfort in my arm I reach forward with it and grabbed the man's shirt collar, slightly strangling him. "Give me a name!" I shouted into his face. We were centimetres apart and, if I were to imagine my expression, I probably looked just as wild eyed as the chunin did._

_"Him," he explained as if that explained everything. Anger flashed in his eyes and his grip tightened again. This time I couldn't help the audible reaction as pain took over my arm. I pushed through with blind determination as tears sprung from my eyes. From the corner of my eye I saw Yoda move around the outskirts of the room, ready to intervene when necessary._

_"Who are you working for?! Tell me!"_

!

As was planned, everyone had heard about the situation.

For the benefit of the operation to make it more long term realistically believable we had to return to bottom of the mill D-ranks. The following months were mind numbing after working our way up in the department to at least interesting jobs and then being again dropped onto civilian tax avoidance and stolen sweets.

That in itself was almost torture and on top of that things started to get tense within the clan walls. Hinata was by no means a weakling but her skills, apparently, were not good enough for a clan heir. With her graduation exam fast approaching Hizashi put her under strenuous training. You could see the poor girl starting to crumble under the brutal beatings of my brother who had replaced me as Hinata sparring partner. I was no longer involved in Hinata's training – in fact I wasn't involved in much clan activity full stop.

It was a month before the graduation exams and a Saturday – Yoda and mine's first Saturday off in quite a while. We spent the morning training and after getting beaten up I decided to go and annoy my friends. Due to work I hadn't been able to visit them as much as I would have wanted to but I had been round to share my affection with them every once in a while.

"Hey Shikamaru!" I shouted banging on his front door violently. "If you don't open this door you lazy bum I'm going to wake you up at five in the morning with a bucket of water for the next week and-" My words were cut short when the door swung opened unexpectedly. My long time best friend stood with a very un-amused face and bed head that showed he'd only just gotten up. "It's noon. Why are you still in bed?" I questioned.

"It's noon, on a Saturday. Why are you not still in bed?" He shot back at me with a blank expression, and then slammed the door violently in my face.

Shikamaru was by no means a morning person.

"So what is it you wanted?" my friend asked me over cup of green tea an hour later.

"Nothing just your love," I responded with a happy smile. We chatted merrily until mid-afternoon when Shikamaru had some clan chores to complete. It was nice to have a constant like Shikamaru in my life.

As I made my way back to the compound a strange weight settled in my stomach, the kind of feeling I'd come to expect with something bad happening, and I quickened my pace. I jumped the compound wall and landed in the garden lightly but there was an eerie quietness that was unnatural at this time of day. The sound of pots and pans banging as supper was made should have been rife in the air and the maids were usually hanging out the washing to dry at this time.

I walked around to the front of Hizashi's house and was about to knock when movement caught my eye. The dojo seemed to be full with people as they watched in fascination at the fight that ensued within. Curious, and a little concerned, I made my way towards the gathering and pushed past the crowd to stand at the front. What I saw within made my stomach drop and my mind kick into automatic.

I was about to take a step forward into the circle to stop the eventual tragedy from happening when a hand landed on my shoulder preventing me from intervening. I glanced over my shoulder angrily to see who had stopped me and saw my father watching the scene before us play out.

"Do no intervene. You will disgrace her," Hizashi spoke emotionlessly.

Neji stood in a perfect Juken stance, as always, with a blank face and his byakugan activated through angry slits. Across from him, shaking like a leaf in the wind and with obvious bruises forming around her arms and neck was Hinata, byakugan trained on Neji with gentle, pleading eyes. From the looks of it the fight was nearing its end and it was already clear who the victor would be.

In one final attempt at fighting back Hinata took a step forward but her stance was wrong and she faltered from obvious pain causing her to twist and leave herself wide open. Not that he needed the invitation, but ever the opportunist, Neji stepped forward and delivered two hard blows to Hinata's stomach and then a final kick to her rib cage that sent her flying across the room and landing in a quivering bundle at the other side of the room.

There was no applause, no congratulations; everybody just went back to their duty quietly. There was no honour in winning against such a weakling.

I didn't hesitate in rushing to my cousin with concern and fear. I'd never seen Neji take so much of his hatred out on Hinata before and I was scared for the little girl that was snifferling in the corner. However, before I could reach her side I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and spin me around aggressively. I found myself, after months of avoidance, face to face with my brother.

"Leave her. She is weak," Neji said with a distasteful expression. I gave him an equally disgusted looked that he should even suggest such a thing and pushed his hand away from me and turned back to Hinata.

It didn't occur to me that I'd ever need to watch my back when it came to Neji; I'd just always trusted that he'd do the right thing, be there for me, watch what I couldn't see.

I felt the disturbance of air at the back of my neck that dislodged a hair or two and I froze on the spot, understanding instantly what had happened and feeling deeply betrayed. I swung around and stared at the hand raised to strike the tenketsu point at back of the neck; a point that if manipulated wrong could kill a person.

A point that, if Neji were to touch, he'd learn about the seal on the back of my neck.

I'd like to think the reason he stopped was because he'd come to his senses. It wasn't.

I'd like to think the reason my father reached out his hand and prevented my brother from landing the blow was because he feared for my safety with such a dangerous move. It wasn't.

I'd also like to think I saw a flicker of concern on Hizashi's face and of horrified surprise on Neji's face as he realized what he was about to do. This I can't be sure on but I'd pretend I saw this in the coming months to help me sleep at night.

Hizashi Hyuuga couldn't allow the seal to be discovered. Neji Hyuuga was very bitter and alone. Nanami Hyuuga was a fool for forgetting she lived among killers and spies.

I swallowed the bile that rose in the back of my throat and pushed down the dark feelings that stirred within me. I turned my back on my closest family and went to help someone in need.

I flittered over Hinata like a worried mother hen and gently helped her to her feet. She whimpered as I put my arm around her back, but she leaned into my support when her legs practically gave out. Fortunately she was very small and light.

"It's funny that for a clan who can see all, we are more blinded than most," I told the men before me in a gentle voice that much reflected Hinata's accepted for the betrayed undertones that were all my own. I left them to broad on their bitterness in peace.

Hinata was barely conscious and I handled her tiny frame with extra care. After I dropped her into the capable hand of my past surrogate mother Suki I made my way to Shikamaru's house, somewhere I knew I would always be able to find help.

He took one look at me and guided me inside gently as if any sudden move might make me run, much like one might approach a wounded dear. He made me a cup of tea, took me to the spare room and gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze that told me I was welcome as long as I needed; all without a single word said between us.

When I really thought about the happenings of the day I realize something that made me very sad. Neji must have made his first kill – his movements held no hesitance.

!

_"Who are you working for? WHO?!"_

_"Y-Y…"_

_"Who is it?" _

_"Yakushi…"_

_Almost simultaneously, as if it had been painstakingly practised over and over again, two consecutive snaps could be heard; one snap of an arm and the other a neck._

_The continuous pressure on my arm seemed to give all of a sudden and it was as if the bone beneath the chunin's hand crumbled into dust._

_Yoda, as if watching and predicting the outcome, had rushed into save me from the broken bone but had been too late by milliseconds. The second snap was that of the chunin's neck as Yoda yanked him away by his hair aggressively and in panic – something I'd never seen from Yoda before._

_The interrogation ended as such; with the chunin dead on the floor and my arm hung at an odd angle to my side._

!

One month later I was suspended from T&I until further notice.

!

**…So, hey guys! Umm, sorry for the lack of updating. Life, you know?**

**This chapter is almost 9,000 words and I've already started writing the next one. Hopefully, I will actually get it out to you within a reasonable amount of time. I've found my writer voice again and hopefully it will keep me inspired to write some more!**

**Let me know what you think of the angst and Neji and Yoda and the interrogation and what you think the next mission would be? Also, tell me what you think about Shikamaru! I just love him so much.**

**Thank you for all your support and lovely comment! See you soon!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 11

!

"_Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak." ― Sun Tzu, The Art of War_

"_The first virtue in a soldier is endurance of fatigue; courage is only the second virtue." - Napoleon Bonaparte_

_!_

"Don't do that! You'll break another- what did I say?!" my new Jonin-sensei Mitasu Ando screamed at his students with panicked hands waving wherever they could find. The man was one of the most worrisome people I had ever met and it had obviously become a game to his students to see how frustrated they could make him in one go.

After being suspended I had moped around for a few days at Shikamaru's under his father's thoroughly amused watch. I had avoided the Hyuuga compound like the plague ever since the incident with Neji, and Hizashi, following his orders of pushing me away from the clan, had encouraged my behaviour with harsh words and quick dismissals. It seemed Shikaku had expected I'd come dragging my feet to his door looking for a bed and had merely stated that he at least expected me to take out the trash every now and again. His wife just seemed glad to have female company in the house for once.

I had a feeling Shikaku was well aware of the mission I'd been assigned, but I didn't voice my suspicions on the basis that I really didn't care. As jonin commander I imaged he knew a lot of interesting things and I'd best not stick my nose where it was not wanted.

After a week of disgrace I was called to the Hokage office. I knew what was expected of me and accepted the 'second chance' I was given on a Genin team graciously. I was supposedly a stand-in member for team 13 after one of the genin had been in a mysterious accident causing him to slip into a healing coma and thus unsuitable for active service for the time being.

My team consisted of a tokubetsu-jonin sensei, specializing in kenjutsu, named Mitasu Ando. Who, I predicated, was blissfully unaware of the goings on of his students right under his nose. Apparently the other two members didn't seem at all suspicious to anyone not in the know.

Akadō Yoroi and Yakushi Kabuto were the picture of perfectly normal genin. Apart from the fact that they didn't seem at all phased by their teammate Tsurugi Misumi's tragic accident and his quick replacement, they were extremely average. So average that if you were to add up all their statistics about missions failed, passed, D-rank to B-rank, abilities and teamwork skills, they sat perfectly in the middle. It was so obviously manoeuvred in this way, if you were looking for it, but it explained why the team had gone completely unnoticed before then. It also said a lot about the talents of the boys as only very talented shinobi could control mission stats so perfectly.

Had I not heard his name in the interrogation room and had an abundance of knowledge from my past life of his sadistic exploits, I would have thought Kabuto actually quite charming.

It turned out that he was in actual fact the only Yakushi in Konoha. My memory was a bit hazy but, from what I recalled, there was once a Yakushi Nonō who had been a jonin of Konoha and the head of the medical corps. She had been Kabuto's adoptive mother but was killed in action in Iwa, which indirectly caused Kabuto to turn to Orochimaru... or something. I _would_ have consulted my hidden journal at that point, but it was still under the floorboards in my room in the Hyuuga compound. I think I needed a few months of space before I could even start considering approaching my family again.

None the less, the higher ups immediately thought that it was Nonō having faked her own death and who was infiltrating the city with the help of Kabuto. Their apparent motivation was unknown and so a spy operation was in order. And so while I was monitoring Kabuto, Yoda was making enquiries into Nonō's death. Obviously I knew Nonō was a dead end (literally), and that Orochimaru was actually the person behind everything, but I couldn't rightfully tell anyone that without proof or at least some evidence.

So I had to start working towards getting Kabuto to spill the beans.

In a sick way I was kind of looking forward to playing a game of wits and lies with the 19 year old iryo-nin.

_!_

_Subject Delta name: Yakushi Kabuto_

_Description: Round glasses, white long hair pulled into low pony-tail, purple ninja slacks and top._

_Subject Delta seems to have a very friendly personality and quickly welcomed me into the group._

_Subject initial personality is rather polite and friendly with a dry sense of humour. Underlying sadistic qualities and manipulative actions have been observed. _

_Role is stable and observations continue. No one suspects. _

_NH_

_!_

No real missions were deployed for the team for at least a week following my addition. Ando-Sensei wanted us to do some 'team building' first and so we had a week of exercises and drills.

When the team began to demonstrate their capabilities I had to bluff up a little bit in some areas and play down my skills in others. In actual fact at the age of 12 my skills in the different jutsu fields were coming along nicely.

I was a genjutsu and taijutsu dependent shinobi and I had no skills whatsoever in ninjutsu , apart from the initial E rank jutsu's one had to perform for the academy exams, due to my deformed chakra coils. In genjutsu I was at a relatively decent level where I could complete sufficiently complex illusions – something very handy for mental torture. The illusions were strong enough to fool a chunin but not yet a jonin, but I was getting there. This was because, in addition to the training Inoichi gave me, I'd also received quite a few tips from my fellow colleagues in T&I about genjutsu and so my skill level in this had increase significantly compared to if I had just been on a normal genin team. You know what they say; it's not what you know, it's who you know!

There had also been an improvement in my taijutsu skills as I had been training with Yoda continuously, most days, for the past four years. I specialized still in my boe staff, using an imitation of the gentle fist but with a staff instead of hands, and studied and used muscle manipulation and pressure point to weaken an opponent. The muscle manipulation could be used in conjuncture with my position in T&I (as it could paralyze an suspect quickly without them losing consciousness), but my boe staff really wasn't designed for the close confined spaces of the interrogation rooms. When I brought this issue up with Ibiki, not long after I had started training with Yoda, asking if I should choose a more suitable style of fighting he said I should keep the weapon.

"You wouldn't be a very good shinobi if you were only good at one thing," he'd told me gruffly. "You're probably not going to spend the entirety of your career in metal rooms, so having skills that are designed for other environments could be a benefit."

When I'd brought it up with my father, asking his opinion, he gave me a long suffering sign, not dissimilar to Shikamaru's reaction when I asked him an annoying question, and answered as such:

"Nanami, do you insist on trying to go against my wishes at every turn? The gentle fist is a style that runs deep in your blood and should be practised and up held by all clans men: byuakugan or not. It is my wish that, if you do not make it to your old age, you may die on the battle field like many of our great ancestors before us with your head held high and in a proud Juken stance."

Shinobi had weird ambitions for their kids, but I'd accepted that answer easily. I know he meant well.

So the boe staff stayed. I'd become quiet formidable with the weapon (relative to my peers), if I do say so myself, but taijutsu alone was rarely enough to take on an extremely strong opponent. Which wasn't an issue for me as I wasn't a front line solider. However, with my skills in both taijutsu and genjutsu I was at least able to effectively complete any combat missions I'd received.

But, I should remind you again, my brother was a prodigy of his time and I, being related to him and despite my chakra disadvantage, did share a few of his skills. And considering my advanced mental age I did manage to pick things up much faster than my peers.

What Team-Ando saw, however, was not that. They saw someone with just above average skills in taijutsu and mediocre at best genjutsu ability. I did try to big up my ninjutsu a little bit but no amount of bluffing could deny the fact that I was utter crap and so everyone, including Ando, pretended they hadn't seen the awful display. All round, a below average shinobi.

I could see from their reactions they started to understand my clan's apparent utter distaste for my existence. Good – the game had begun.

When Kabuto was displaying his skills I could tell that there was a certain amount of pull in his punches and over modesty in his work. This would have seemed a lacking in self-confidence thing to anyone else and was apparently what Ando sensei had decided based on his positive encouragement, but to me I could see right through his outer layer to the self satisfied smugness underneath that breathed a righteous arrogance.

To be fair though, I was unsure whether it was my ability to read people or my knowledge of the future that allowed me to see what was really hidden under his skin. None the less, it made my skin crawl in turn and I frequently had to move away from the boy when he was in close proximity (subtly, I might add).

Kabuto demonstrated his medical skills and Yoroi his energy absorbing trick. I was impressed by both their performances and wasn't hesitant to praise their ability. This seemed to immediately put me into their good graces. I think they saw me as a bit of a suck up that would do a lot to get the older boys attention and probably easily manipulated. Or eventually, if things went to plan, just a naïve shinobi who was being isolate by her village and family with a strong bloodline, who was willing to help anyone who gives her a bit of praise and who might even deflect from the loveless village if given the right push.

We'd thought through all my motivations for my behaviour in long, meticulous detail before I was sent into the field.

The reason Ibiki had been so thorough with my undercover story was due to the pure dangerous reputation Nonō had as an infiltration specialist when she was in 'a particular section of ANBU' (ROOT, if you were wondering). Konoha needed a way to gain information and fast – and I was the easiest and quickest available person to put on the job with a back-story of clan conflict and seclusion just waiting to be exploited.

I think I pulled it off well and so, all in all, a pretty good first impression.

!

"So what do you guys do after training?" I asked Yoroi and Kabuto like a keen child who wanted to hang out with her new friends a little longer.

It had been little over two weeks from when I had first been placed into the team. After a weeks worth of training (comparatively mild compared to Yoda's idea of training) Ando-sensei admitted that we were efficient enough working together as a team to start doing some D-rank missions. So in the following week and a half we managed to complete 12 D-rank missions and Ando had promised that we would soon move onto more advanced tasks since I gained more competence everyday.

Kabuto smiled down at me as he shuffled his deck of shinobi-data cards absentmindedly.

"I've got a part-time position at the hospital actually," he said. "I work every other Tuesday and Wednesday to gain more experience in medical ninjutsu." His hand began to glow a little bit and he couldn't seem to mask the expression of irony that cross his face when he glanced down at the green light. He was, after all, a Jonin class medical-nin who could probably teach the doctors at the hospital a thing or two. But for appearance sake I suppose it kept his cover rather nicely.

"I live above a teppanyaki restaurant on the high street," said Yoroi as he rolled his shoulder and neck, winding down from that afternoons spar. "If I get there before the dinner rush then I get a discounted meal."

Yoroi was a very shallow person. Physically, he was a force to be reckoned with and his special energy absorbing jutsu gave me the creeps. Mentally though he was overly simple minded and unnecessarily cruel. He was the type of person that would go out of his way to kick a cat and would do absolutely anything as long as there was a benefit for him somewhere.

It didn't take me long to give a quick report to Ibiki concerning his rather lacking personality and mental capabilities as there really wasn't much to say.

"Wow guys, that sounds so cool!" I expressed with exuberance, slightly over doing it.

"What about you Nana?" asked Kabuto in a patronising voice.

"Probably just going back to the Nara's. I haven't exactly got my hands full at the moment," I said with an air of carelessness with an undertone of bitterness that was meant to be 'subtle'.

Yoroi frowned and looked over to me. "Why you living with the Nara's?" he asked as if the idea was highly distasteful.

"Oh well, you know…" I muttered embarrassedly. "I was friends with the Nara heir at the academy. They probably just want to have the Hyuuga byukugan-less token under their control." Resent slipped into my voice easily and I gave my teammates a tight-lipped smile. I felt bad about saying these things about Shikamaru's family, as I knew they really did care about me, but it was necessary to gain team 13's trust. It wouldn't do if they thought I had strong loyalties to any part of the village.

"I heard that the Hyuuga's didn't take your forced suspension from the intelligence division very well," Kabuto said smoothly, as if it was a well-known fact throughout the village. In fact, Hizashi had made an effort for the word not to get too spread around about my ostracisation, as it could be detrimental to the strong collective image the Hyuuga possessed if word managed to get around to other villages. Also it had to look like it was real, and being unsubtle about the goings on behind the clan walls was practically screaming 'we're up to something sneaky but we want you to know about it!'. Ibiki wanted this to look as real as possible and according to him if Yakushi did know about my circumstances then it just made him all the more suspicious

It was surprisingly easy to keep the whole situation on the down low as the other clans didn't much care for inter-clan conflict that wasn't their own and kept gossip to themselves (a prime example of that would be the original Uchiha massacre where none of the other clans made much of an effort to try and stop their fall to darkness). On that note, apparently even my clan-to-be the Uchiha's didn't seem all that bothered by their future bride's shame. As long as they got the Hyuuga blood and stronger village ties they were happy.

I kept quiet and didn't reply to Kabuto's suggested question.

"Yeah, I heard some pretty gruesome stuff went down in the interrogation room," Yoroi said with an excited smile – the kind people get when they start talking about their hobbies.

I frowned at Yoroi and glanced around us as if making sure no one was listening to the conversation. "Why?" I asked with hesitance. "What did you hear?"

In all honesty I was actually curious. Ibiki's minions around the village obviously over exaggerated the goings on of the interrogation, but gossip tended to amplify everything to the extreme. I was almost reluctant to hear the answer as it probably made me out to look like a psychopath.

"I heard that you were in there for hours making him scream for the fun of it," said Yoroi with a smirk. "Heard you didn't even manage to get any information out of him about who he really was – you just got too carried away with his pain."

"That's not what happened exactly," I mumbled unconvincingly as I looked down as if mortified that my new teammates had heard about that. But at the same time I made sure that Kabuto could just glance the smirk that danced across my face before I could school my features. After all, if Kabuto thought I was a closet sadist then he would be much more willing to approach me at a later date to recruit me into his services.

"Yeah it was. That's why you got suspended – because you mercilessly killed someone, who could possibly give the village information, for no other reason than to watch him suffer," Yoroi was laughing at me, obviously enjoying my uncomfortable behaviour.

"That's enough Yoroi," said Kabuto with a frown to his teammate in disapproval. "She obviously doesn't want to talk about it." Kabuto looked back at me with an expectant expression.

I gave a short laugh as if I was trying to ease up the tension of the situation, forced myself to relaxed and shot a wry but wary expression in their general direction. "Well, you know, I think I scared my team mate for life. Hope you guys don't have such a delicate constitution," I told them with a shrug.

This caused Yoroi to give another bark of laughter and Kabuto to give me a humorous and yet calculating look.

"No worries of that Nanami," Kabuto said softly with a slight upturn of the lips – I think it was the most honest thing he'd said to me so far. I looked back at him shyly but also visibly pleased and surprised that my new teammates hadn't shunned my supposedly sadistic ways.

_Oh god, I just connected with Kabuto, one of the most high functioning psychopaths of the Naruto-verse. How disturbing._

I left them to pounder my words and had to swallow down a smirk as I walked away. I could almost hear the clogs turning in Kabuto's mind and I knew he'd spotted a kind of opportunity.

!

Our first mission as a team was a success. Our second was a failure. Our third was a success and so was our fourth. A whole month had passed and before I knew it I'd fallen into my persona easily and comfortably without making a single slip. I even think that Yoroi and Ando-sensei were becoming rather fond of me. During every mission I didn't see anything overly suspicious from my teammates and especially not from our sensei. There really was very little to report apart from an average, fully functioning genin team and it was actually a little boring compared to my time in T&I.

Although my official job was to monitor Kabuto and his team, I made an extra special effort to gather information that disproved Ando-sensei's involvement. It wasn't difficult as he'd never actually been much of a suspect anyway. From his kindly words and constant state of worrying he obviously had nothing to do with any under hand dealings.

"Nanami, have you lost weight?" he'd asked me with concern one evening on a C-rank mission within the land of fire. I looked across the campfire at my sensei with a genuinely warm smile. Kabuto and Yoroi were within the surrounding area gathering firewood and scouting for food. Ando-sensei and I had set up camp a while ago and were just waiting on the rest of the teams return. Stupidly I'd gotten distracted by my inner sulking and if I'd paid closer attention I might have realized that the two boys were taking an awfully long time - I'd record that later in my report.

"Don't worry Ando-sensei, I'm fine," I said.

_Lie._

I wasn't okay, not really. One, I hadn't properly talked to my brother in months and this wasn't something that had ever happened before – well, not for this long anyway. He'd always been a constant in my life and I couldn't help feeling a little empty without his steady presence. Sure, I had Shikamaru who was probably preventing me from spiralling into a pit of self-pity, but Neji was my big brother and his betrayal still _hurt. _

Secondly, I missed Yoda.

Sure, every now and then he came to the Nara house to check on me and make sure I was alright, but we didn't do any training together. He tried to keep me updated on his (lack of) investigation into Nonō but I missed the constant working rhythm we had adapted. The previous week he'd actually gone away on a scouting mission to Iwa as he hadn't pulled up any leads on Nonō and so he was going to be away for god knew how long and that made me so sad!

Of course, I didn't tell anyone all this inner turmoil, I simply channelled my aggression into my work.

"Nana, does your clan-"

"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY CLAN!" _…did I shout that? Wow, yeah I shouted that. Should I keep going or…?_ "My clan don't want me so why would I want them?! I don't want to be involved with such idiots. I HATE THEM!" I kept going for a few more minutes and Ando-sensei eyes seemed to grow wider and wider and I could see him regretting asking the question. Poor guy probably got whiplash from me smiling at him one second to screaming my problems in his face the next.

I probably went a little over the top but there was genuine anger running through me, not because I was angry at the Hyuuga, but because I was just feeling so hard done by.

Also it was raining.

Also I had just started my period for the first time and I was feeling a little uncomfortable. And sad. And teenagery.

_Oh my god, I'm being an emotional teenager. Puberty for the second time. THE SECOND TIME?!_

I think it was safe to say that I was in a horrendous mood for the rest of the mission and my teammates wisely choose to stay away from me and talk to me as minimally as possible. On the plus side, it made me look even more like a petulant child who could easily be manipulated against her clan.

When I got home from that mission I curled up into a little balled on my bed in the Nara's spare room and cried. A lot.

"Man, your brother is such an idiot." Shikamaru's voice woke me from my slumber gently the next morning, accompanied by a _thud thud thud_ noise. Light was creeping in through the narrow window above my bed and the bright beams caught in my eyes and made me blink a few times before I could located where the voice was coming from. "It's obvious this is all for a mission. Dad said they're expecting a lot from you." I glanced at my friend without surprise or even disprovable. Of course Shikaku knew about my predicament and, quite frankly, I expected Shikamaru to put two and two together eventually. However, due to the sensitivity of the mission I couldn't say anything about it. I just glanced at my friend, who was lying on the bedroom floor and throwing a ball up and down in the air, with a raised eyebrow – the expression that everyone always said made me look like Neji.

He looked back at me with his own unimpressed expression. I just rolled my eyes and lifted my hand to rub away the sleep and salty tear tracks that were still lingering from the night before.

"The academy exam is today by the way," Shikamaru said as he grabbed the ball out of the air and held it in place above his face.

That information made me wake up a bit more and I lifted my head to look at my friend. "What? How come you didn't tell me before?! Baka!" I turned around and grabbed my pillow from behind my head and threw it into his face.

"You would have worried yourself," Shikamaru reasoned, frowning in annoyance at my attack. "I'd figured you'd had enough on your plate as it was."

I gave the boy a doubtful look because I knew that was not why he didn't tell me. The child was chronically lazy and simply didn't want the ruthless training regime he knew I'd create for him. Being Yoda's partner and all I knew full well what ruthless training looked like and Shikamaru, being as intelligent as always, was in no hurry to inflict that upon himself.

Speaking of said intelligence the boy slowly got up as if not trying to startle me and started to back away heading to the door. He was up to something and my sleep filled eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"Shikamaru…" I said in a low voice that I knew he related with something _troublesome_ on his end. As he moved further and further away from me he didn't break eye contact for a second.

"By the way…" said the soon to be Genin hesitantly as he stood just inside the door. "Inoichi's here to see you…"

I frowned. "Okay… that's nice?" I said with confusion. Why would that make Shikamaru all jumpy and scared?

"He said something about your sensei approaching him about your last mission." Shikamaru completely removed himself from the room with those words and stood in the doorframe ready to bolt. I frowned again, completely at a loss. It was too early to be dealing with this! I didn't get it, what could have happened on the mission to make Ando-sensei go to Inoichi for help-

"He-said-he's-here-to talk-to-you-about-your-women-problems!" spluttered the boy in panic, and with that the Nara heir was gone with the wind. _He really should stop pretending to be so slow all the time._

_Wait... what?_ Before I had any time to process that data Inoichi had replaced Shikamaru at my door and strolled into the room uninvited. I'm going to say that, because I was still in bed and exhausted from the mission and crying session the night before, I may be excused for my slow understanding at this point. Inoichi's sadistic grin really should have warned me at what was to come.

"Hello my dear student," Inoichi said with a bounce.

"Inoichi-sensei," I acknowledge warily. I knew that look. That was the expression he used to have when he was about to start toying with my mind. "What did Shikamaru mean by _woman problems-_"

My eyes opened in abject horror and I sat back in bed and pulled the covers over my head. If I pretended he wasn't there maybe he'd go away.

"Hmm, first signs of teenage hormones surfacing. This is more serious than I thought," muttered the man. The covers were whipped off my bed and my ex-sensei was smiling down at me with glee.

"I know all about the birds and the bees!" I shouted with closed eyes and my arms thrown over my head in protection. "I don't want to hear what you have to say!"

"Tough," Inoichi said with an all business tone. "I have given this talk to my own daughter and she didn't come out of it scarred for life and neither will you." I sat up and glanced at the door and the windows in panic, but when I looked back at Inoich he didn't look impressed.

"You will receive this talk from me now or later. But it will happen," he said menacingly. My shoulders slumped visibly and I stared angrily at the man in front of me.

"Well come on then, I don't have all day," I said with a pout as I cross my arms over my chest and glared with all my might. Inoichi wasn't bothered in the slightest and seemed to revel at his small victory.

"So," he began with a cough. "Now you are at a particular age you will start to feel all kinds of new things…"

_!_

On my way out later that day I glared at Shikaku as if he'd betrayed me. He just shrugged his shoulders and said I'd get over it.

I wouldn't. Ever.

Soon I found myself standing on the branch of a tree outside the academy, over looking the school courtyard and watching all the children coming out of the front gates with wide smiles and forehead protectors waving in the air. I knew that, had Ibiki not seen my potential years earlier, I would be among them.

I probably would have run to Neji in excitement as he waited for me to come out, a proud smile trying to worm its way onto his face and a half-stoic 'well done' that would betray his true happiness for me becoming a real ninja. Maybe it's because last year we graduated together that I stopped being his little sister and started to become something else in his eyes – A threat to the integrity of the Hyuuga? Who knew? He never doubted that I could look after myself, but he did try and protect me in his own way none the less. Not that I needed a big brother and it wasn't like Neji was more emotionally mature or with more experience than I, but really I expected more from him; I didn't expect him to just stop.

I watched as Hinata walked out of the school followed by Shino at a sedated pace. The quiet girl seemed happier than I'd seen her in a long time as she held the forehead protector in front of her with reverence and awe but also with a proud smile that I'd never quite seen grace her features. There was confidence in her eyes and it made pride well up inside me. _You go Hinata. Prove your worth to the world._

Shino walked besides her, also admiring his headband, just as quietly. However, there was an obvious comfortable silence shared between the two new genin and, not for the first time, I was extremely glad that she had such a friend.

Other familiar faces followed including Sakura and Kiba who made a huge fuss about their elevated level as they greeted their families with huge smiles. Ino, Choji and Shikamaru were met by their fathers together with many smirks and fussing. Inoichi was alight like a Christmas tree as he caught his daughter in his arms as she jumped at him and shoved her headband in his face. Chōza gave his son a pat on the back and Shikaku gave Shikamaru a rare smile instead of his trademark smirk. It was a very nice scene.

Probably, if I'd been a normal young girl, I would have felt a small amount of bitterness at the happy family and the loving fathers. However, this was my second chance at life and any true childishness had been put behind me long ago. The first time around I'd had the happy family and the loving father. This time, although my family was a broken one, it didn't make me love them any less but instead made me determined to give that type of happiness to my brother and father simply because they had never had it.

I shook my head, shaking away the heavy thoughts and went to try and spot a particular blond haired ball of energy. I dreaded to see the sad and dejected look on the young boys face as he came out of the academy as the only one who hadn't qualified as ninja. And yet I had to come and check that everything happened as it was supposed to. This was the start of _Naruto, _the point of opening when he learns the truth of his curse and becomes a ninja. For this to take place he must fail.

My worrying was stopped and was replaced with dismay moments later when a loud cry of joy was expressed from the roof of the academy.

"I'M A NINJA!" It screamed, "LOOK OUT KONOHA, YOUR NEXT HOKAGE IS ON THE WAY!"

I felt a bit sick. Not that I wasn't happy for the boy, no of course I was I loved Naruto and all his obliviousness, but _I'd changed something again_. The unsettling feeling was familiar and as unpleasant as I remembered from four years ago when I found out about the massacre. This time, however, I was prepared.

In all reality, I'd expected something like this to happen. I'd gone over it a few times in my head and convinced my self that if this circumstance did arise it wouldn't put Naruto's path to his ambitions off track too much. The Uchiha massacre was a much more significant event than at what point in the timeline Naruto found out he was the container of the Kyuubi. Besides, he'd more than likely have Kakashi as a sensei who would ensure and nurture Naruto the way his father would want. If that were to change then I would have to start actively changing things again – and I hadn't done much of that since I'd enlightened Iruka on Naruto's living conditions.

I was lost in my musing and my potential planning and so didn't notice the approaching body. In all fairness, I probably wasn't even skilled enough to have detected his presence, with him being ANBU.

"Hyuuga Nanami," came a soft voice from behind me. I jumped out of my skin and my heart fluttered uncontrollably. Whether from fright or because of who it was I'll never know, but I whisked around to see none other that Uchiha Itachi standing behind me.

"Uchiha-san," I greeted formally, trying to maintain composure with a respectful bow worthy of a Hyuuga. The branch we both perched on was thick and hidden in the trees, and so no curious on lookers could see the exchange. I'd been covering my chakra as best as I could since I'd arrived and only if you were specifically looking for my presence would you have noticed it (which Inoichi did when he looked towards the tree and gave it a rather theatrical wink, and Shikaku to when he realized what his friend was doing and gave him an elbow in the ribs).

"Why are you hiding in the trees?" Itachi asked, tilting his head to the side curiously. The hair framing his face swung to the side at the movement and I found myself simply staring at him in fascination as an image from another world surfaced to the front of my mind. The image in my mind had black fingernails; a long black trench coat with crimson cloud designs and blood red eyes framed by infinitely deep bags that spoke of many sleepless nights. However, instead of that image I saw a normal person, dressed in a standard Konoha flat jacket, plain dark brown eyes and a lightness to him that seemed almost content. _I'd changed so much within this man…_

"I-I… Umm," I said stupidly, losing my cool. "Sight seeing?" I supplied.

_Really? Did you actually just say that? Sight seeing… what?!_ I didn't even hide my shame as I closed my eyes and shook my head in disbelief in an attempt to gather my thoughts, shaking the remnants of an Akatsuki Itachi from my mind.

When I opened my eyes Itachi was still staring at me with open curiosity; waiting for an answer.

"What do you think?" I snapped, annoyed that Itachi had thrown me off so much.

Amusement coloured his features for the briefest of seconds but it was gone in a flash. If I hadn't spent such a long time in T&I honing in and perfecting my natural ability to read people then I probably wouldn't have seen anything other than his stoic, emotionless self.

The subtle sign of emotion made me feel less apprehensive around him and I even relaxed a little bit. He must have noticed this, however, and wanted for whatever reason to put me back on edge.

"I wouldn't expect you to be around since your increasing emotional… outbursts." Itachi looked at me very seriously but I could tell he was simply trying to wind me up. And it was working.

"Why has everyone heard about this?!" I hissed through my teeth as, I'm sure, my face started to flush red.

"You weren't subtle," he told me with a frown.

"My _sensei_ wasn't subtle," I muttered, pursing my lips.

I was a full-grown woman on the inside, with years under my belt of dealing with menstruation, and so I shouldn't be blushing like a schoolgirl at peoples teasing. Itachi's expression didn't change but from the look in his eyes I realized his was laughing at me. I'd come across Itachi's humour many years ago through my friendship with Sasuke and knew that the man, without all those many ghosts following him around, could actually be rather light-hearted. But for it to be so familiarly thrown at me was a bit odd.

"Why are you goading me?" I questions with blank seriousness most expected from a higher official and a voice I knew he should instantly react to due to the military training deeply ingrained into his persona. Well, I thought he would react like that as the trick worked on most ninja. However, he simply looked at me with even more curiosity and his eyes softened.

"You maybe shouldn't be here," he said, growing more sombre.

"And why is that?" I questioned with a slight raise of the eyebrow, unimpressed by his forwardness. He probably knew about my mission, being an ANBU captain and all, but he wouldn't dare say something to me with the classified nature of my assignment.

"You're playing a very dangerous game, Hyuuga Nanami," mumbled Itachi giving me a serious expression to try articulate his point. He seemed… worried? Why would he be worried about me? What would it matter to him if something were to happen to me?

_Ergh, this is confusing and making my stomach turn… It's almost like he knows something I don't._

"Well, why are you here?" I asked, rather rudely, but then again he was being overly perplexing for no apparent reason and I really was curious about why he'd be outside the academy of all places. Surely, he hadn't come to see me?

He just raised an eyebrow as if questioning my intelligence and nodded over my shoulder. "What do you think?" he said, repeating my earlier comment. I turned around and mentally face palmed as, obviously he would turn up to see if his brother had graduated.

I hadn't noticed him before as he'd been one of the last out the building but Sasuke was down below in the courtyard standing with his mother and father. The young boy was forever trying to look stoic but massively failing in light of his parents pride for their son. Fugaku had taken time out of his busy life as Uchiha head and police chief to meet his son on the day of his graduation; how unexpected. The look on Sasuke's face made me glad to have changed the fate of the Uchiha. He was my friend and deserved as much happiness as anyone.

When I turned around to address the Uchiha heir once again I found, a little miffed, he had disappeared without a trace, as if he hadn't been there in the first place. His appearance at all was so surreal I even questioned if the exchange even took place or if I'd just imaged it. I felt frustration at the elder teen well up inside me and I rolled my eyes and huffed out a breath. A snag of childishness irrationality surfaced for a second as I felt slightly annoyed that Itachi didn't realize how much heart ache I'd saved him just by being alive and changing the fate of his clan - considering that he had the gall to goad and mock me so unrepentantly. Not that I wanted him to find out, but that didn't stop me from feeling the unfairness of the whole situation.

I waved a hand in front of my face to physically brush away the negative feelings and put those thoughts away for later. I had to meet my team for a final mission debriefing before we could have the rest of the day to relax, and so I set off towards the training field.

My heart felt heavy as I glanced at the Hokage monument and wondered at what the future could possibly hold. I'd kept changing things over and over and now that the original timeline had started I'd begin to notice again when and where I was making an impact. The Uchiha's appearance this time round was sure to make a colossal difference to how things were meant to play out and I'd be lying if I said Itachi's presence didn't unnerve me. It was yet another reminder of what could have been and what was. I just hoped my little old' heart could take the strain of knowing more than it should and it could take the damage if bad things happen that were never meant to be.

It had begun. The start of Naruto's path to Hokage had begun and this time, with any luck, I was going to make it was much smoother ride.

_!_

Since the Rookie nine had finally graduated there was a celebration going on in each clan. Choji almost begged me to turn up to the Ino-shika-cho celebration on the grounds that Ino was going to be more unbearable than usual and Shikamaru would spend the whole evening complaining about how much effort being a ninja was going to be.

I laughed at their pain but declined the offer politely. I didn't mind, for once, attending a Hyuuga celebration as it was after all in Hinata's name. It was grander than the previous year when Neji and me had graduated, but there seemed to be a significant amount more tension in the air.

My presence in the room also seemed to put a few people on edge, but they could get over it. I was here to support Hinata who was sweet and lovely and deserved to have genuine praise for her accomplishment. You see, although I was being shamed by the clan it didn't actually mean I had been kicked out or anything like that. Simple as, I had "dishonoured" the family name and I would be looked upon in a disgraced manor until I had _regained my honour _– their Zuko complex was really starting to get on my not-yet-existent tits_._ Hizashi reassured me that as soon as it was explained to everyone that it was all for the benefit of a mission and internal spy assignment everything would go back to exactly how it was before.

I glanced at my brother from across the room, as he stood alone and emotionless. Somehow, I didn't think that _everything_ would go back to the way it was before.

The teams were assigned the next day and their jonin sensei's introduced to them. Hinata was overjoyed that her best friend Shino would be on the same team as her and her confidence seemed grow a little just with the reassurance that her friend would be by her side. Kiba, from what I'd heard from Shikamaru, was pretty miffed to be on such a boring team.

Team 7 were predictably very similar to how they had been before. Apart from this time Naruto was a little less lonely and Sasuke wasn't a little emo child. Sakura was… well, she was the same. But she'd grow out of it so no worries there. I wondered briefly if Kakashi had changed at all, but considering I'd arrived in the world well after his tragedies had been and gone there really was very little I could have impacted.

There was never any doubt that the ino-shika-cho trio would once again be reborn (much to Shikamaru's chagrin of being on a team with Ino) and so all was well with the world for once!

Overall, I couldn't express how relieved I was that all the genin teams had turned out the same. Maybe some things, like the bonds of friendship and love that the teams possessed, could withstand even the crumbling of fate. Not even my precocious presence in this universe could break apart such bonds.

Shikaku, later that week, politely asked me if it was all right if I wouldn't mind staying back at the Hyuuga compound for one night. There was a secret tradition that had to be up held for Shikamaru now that he was an official ninja and, as I understood very well about clan secrets that are best kept secret, I agreed to return for one night.

Hinata seemed surprised but please to see me twice in one week and we gossiped late into the night about everything we had missed from each other's lives. I'd completely forgotten how nice it was spending time with my cousin and her genuine concern about me made my heart swell – even though she should technically have been shunning my presence.

Later that same night I was called to my fathers study.

"Well, hello, _dad," _I said mockingly. Hizashi scowled at me disapprovingly but I just rolled my eyes.

"How have you been?" he asked sternly as he lent forward on his desk and looked me up and down with searching eyes. He seemed… worried? Wait what? He was actually genuinely worried about me. Somehow, I managed to rein in my sass attack and gave a light cough instead.

"I'm fine," I said with a frown.

"Not what I've heard," said Hizashi mirroring my expression.

"Oh my god, I wish for the love off all things holy Ando-sensei would stop telling the world about my move into womanhood!" I exclaimed, attempting but failing to keep my voice low.

"So you don't need…" Hizashi looked me in the eye, refusing to back down from a challenge, but this time he looked… embarrassed? And was that a blush?! Wow, I'd made my father embarrassed.

"No!" I told him with quick reassurance. As amusing as it would have been to watch my father stubble through the explanation of puberty, I didn't think either of us would come out of the humiliating conversation unscathed. "Inoichi more than covered the topic."

Hizashi gave a quick cough. "Good," was all he said.

"Ando-sensei was overreacting. All I said to the guy was how much I hate this clan and that you were all stupid and that I'd be so much better without the lot of you because all you do is stop me from reaching my full potential. Which, of course, is completely true because the Hyuuga's have a very twisted way about doing everything. Basically, I hate you all." We stood in silence for a few seconds and Hizashi looked at me as if questioning my sanity.

"That's all I said," I muttered with an irritable expression and pursed lips. His lack of reaction got slightly on my nerves.

"I thought you were good at lying," he said without an inflection in his voice.

"I am!" I hissed with petulance.

I opened my mouth to say that as my father he's _supposed_ to be able to tell when I'm lying and perhaps worst father of the year would go to someone else this year, despite that fact he'd ordered our entire family to shun me. It was a low blow and would have been spat with a lot of bitterness, which Hizashi would have brushed it off without problem, and we would have continued on the conversation as if nothing had happened.

That was, until the air got stuck in the back of my throat and I couldn't physically seem to form the words. At the same time a light tingling sensation started on the back of my neck and my hand went to rest on the seal in surprise. I hadn't felt this sensation in quite a few years and suddenly my mind was back in time, under the cherry blossom tree at the back of the compound shortly after Hanabi was born, and having the first real argument I'd ever had with Neji. He'd been bitter about his seal and said I'd never understand and I'd tried to reassure him that I truly did get it but, just like now, I could hardly remember how to speak.

Hizashi seemed to realize what was happening instantly and had his byakugan activated before I could even make a sound of puzzlement. When I saw a looked of panic cross his face as he gazed beyond the wall my stomach dropped; someone had been listening in. He moved faster than I'd ever seen him before, going over to the door and sliding it open with urgency. No one was there but, from what I could gather, someone had been moments before.

"Who was it?" I asked with a squeak, barely regaining my ability to speak again.

Hizashi didn't say anything and just stood staring down the corridor with his doujutsu still switched on.

"Well, they couldn't have heard anything too secret, otherwise the seal would have stopped me earlier," I said trying to reassure my obviously distressed parent. Hizashi and distressed were not two things that usually went together, and so you could understand my concern.

"No, but this may be an issue none the less," my father said in a deep, solemn voice.

"Why? Who was it?" I tried to go over the entirety of the conversation in my head. Apart from my obvious disrespect and my little speech about how much I hated the clan (which was a semi-common knowledge rumour we were trying to encourage anyway) I hadn't said anything particularly terrible. Plus, any clan secrets we might have mentioned, like me calling Hizashi '_Dad,'_ would have been stopped by the curse seal.

"Your brother," Hizashi said. My heart fluttered lightly in my chest and I closed my eyes in dread.

_Of course._

I tried looking for Neji the next day but he wasn't anywhere to be found. When I asked around the clan I was told he'd gone out on a C-rank mission just that morning and wasn't expected to be back for at least a month, if not longer.

Neji was never very good at dealing with any type of negative emotion. Whatever he'd heard me talking to Hizashi about the previous night had obviously not sat well with him. I had my suspicions about which part of the conversation he'd heard and that meant nothing good for me. I knew how he worked and although he'd probably felt guilty about the incident in the dojo all those months ago, those feelings would now be over shadowed by his disgust at my abandonment of the clan.

I did some more sulking that afternoon.

!

Day to day life continued on as always and I found my team members began to trust me more and more as time went on. All the rookie-nine took to life as a ninja naturally and with zealous enthusiasm. I continued to live with the Nara clan and they didn't give any hints that they wanted me to leave. I offered Shikaku a percentage of my earnings from team 13's D and C rank missions, but he refused graciously saying he could more than afford my up keep - plus if he started charging for rooms Inoichi might believe he was welcome to take over a bed anytime he wanted as long as he contributed to the running of the house. I knew he was half joking and so was extremely grateful to the clan head for his unspoken support.

I heard very little from Neji but what I picked up here and there were as a ninja he was becoming formidable and strong. As a person? Insufferable. When he returned from his mission I had tried to approach him on a number of occasions but he wouldn't allow me to have even a word in and I knew if I backed him into a corner I might do more harm than good. So I let him be.

At one point I asked Hizashi to talk to his son and help him through his self inflicted isolation and trust issues but he refused.

"I am not his father," was his answer. I would have argued with the man but for the pained expression that he couldn't quite keep hidden that danced across his face. _He really had no choice in the matter._

I probably would have tried harder too fix the broken bonds within my family but I actually had a mission to fulfil and so put all my efforts into that. My comrades seemed to enjoy my company and occasional sadistic humour and it was nice to pretend to be someone else for such a significant part of the day. In return I actually started to feel like a fit into team 13 rather snugly and even started to enjoy my missions with Kabuto, Yoroi and Ando-sensei.

About 4 months after their graduation I found out from Naruto and Sasuke that team 7 had completed their first C-rank mission, and predictably they were scarred for life. Over the last year I hadn't spent that much time with the lovable ball of energy as I should have and so when I got home from a mission, and realized how close the chunin exams were, I'd approached him about getting a bite to eat and having a catch up. The young boy jumped at the chance to hang out with an old friend and Sasuke, having seen equally as little of me over the past year, came along. We found ourselves sitting in front of Ichiraku's ramen stand talking about everything under the sun.

"…and then Sasuke's eyes turned red!" Naruto shouted causing several people to stare at us in disprovable. I glanced at the young Uchiha with a raise brow and he looked back at me with an immodest smirk.

"So you activated your sharingan?" I asked stupidly with a grin. Sasuke gave a genuine smile and I gave my friend a pat on the back. "Of course you did! I bet over the next few years you'll get even stronger than your brother." Sasuke gave a huge speech about how of course he'd get stronger than Itachi and that we should wait and see him become the best sharingan user ever to be born into the Uchiha clan. Naruto and me laughed at this, which caused Sasuke to get annoyed and refuse to talk to us.

When I asked how Naruto did on the mission Sasuke started talking about the awesome chakra the blond had released that saved the day. Naruto, however, went quiet at the mention of the chakra and I guessed easily what this meant. He'd found of about the Kyuubi, probably from Kakashi explaining the bare minimum to the young boy. This was inevitable

Speaking of which…

"Hello there," said a lazy voice from behind me. I hadn't noticed his approach and I felt something jar in my back as soon as I felt his presence. This was _the _HatakeKakashi, the man that I'd had the hugest crush on when I watched the show and the person who allows the main characters to developed and become their best selves. I felt slightly awed, as if I were meeting a celebrity. I turned to him quickly, snapping my neck around to look at my friend's jonin-sensei, and found a pair of smiling eyes and a half masked face looking back at me.

It was disappointing. In real life the mask wasn't sexy, it was… unnerving and felt slightly over dramatic. Sure, I'd seen Kakashi in the street a few times and acknowledged his existence with fangirl-ness but, really, I didn't see it anymore. Maybe I'd stopped seeing everybody as any relation to the fictional characters of old and because of that found no interlink to the feelings from before my death and the feelings after.

"Kakashi-sensei!" shouted Naruto with a smile, waving in Kakashi's face with enthusiasm.

"Hello Sasuke; Naruto," humoured the older man. "And your friend is…?"

"Hyuuga Nanami," I introduced myself, getting up off the stool and bowing respectfully.

"I hope you haven't been sharing too much classified information with your friend," Kakashi warned with no subtlety. In all fairness, Naruto didn't actually understand the word "subtle" and wouldn't be able to comprehend anything other than brutal honestly. Kakashi had obviously learned this early on.

"All within the parameters of the missions secrecy," Sasuke reassured, looked at Kakashi with a frown. He then looked back to me with a tight-lipped smile and this made me pause. I looked back at my friend with a forced smile as my stomach filled with a sick, unsure feeling. Did Sasuke… doubt me?

Kakashi would be aware of the rumours surrounding my time in T&I and probably thought it best for his team to stay away from me, but I also had this feeling that Sasuke knew as well – and was being wary. All of a sudden I felt as if I was no longer welcome amongst these friends and I thought it prudent to leave as swiftly as possible.

I made my excuses and left them sitting at the ramen stand, slightly perplexed at my sudden departure. I walked down the street with my hands in my pockets; head down and, most likely, emitting an overly large amount of teenage angst.

"Well, that was cold of your old friends, wouldn't you agree?" commented a voice from my left as I walked past a side alley. Kabuto walked out from the darkness with a strangely triumphant smirk gracing his features and gave me a measured expression that seemed to be sizing me up. "So very suspicious of them."

"Just leave it, yeah?" I sneered at Kabuto and kept walking on. He didn't bring up the incident again, but I have a feeling it helped my case in the long run.

It was six weeks following that conversation that two members of team 13 made a little slip.

We were on a mission to a town just inside the land of rice paddies. They were having trouble with bandits and so we were hired to apprehend the criminals or run them out of town. It was a straightforward C-rank mission with few complications and there was very little potential for things to go wrong. In fact nothing went wrong. The mission was carried out efficiently and to the exact parameters given at the beginning. There was not even a single casualty and Ando-sensei was so proud he allowed us an extra day in the town that actually turned out to be host to a famous hot springs resort.

I loved this part of the culture.

"Oh, I haven't ever been to a Hot spring outside of Konoha!" I said with merriment, as we stood outside the resort, ready to spend a relaxing night in a foreign country. "Besides, Ando-sensei, you still owe me big time." I dropped my smile and looked to my sensei next to me with an overly cool expression.

He just gave me a tight smile and a pat on my head. "I've gone over this with you Nana, I was only looking out for your best interests," Ando said with an insufferable lack of remorse. He really did worry about everything way too much.

"Don't worry Nana, everyone understands what you're going through," Kabuto supplied in, looking understanding. "You know when we train to become medical ninja we deal with lots of-" he started but was cut short by Ando-sensei throwing an arm around his shoulder and without any form of delicacy preventing Kabuto from saying whatever stupid reassurance was going to come out of his mouth.

"Shall we go in and have a nice relax, non-threatening and non-antagonistic time within the warm, natural hot springs?" Ando-sensei said through gritted teeth. We all nodded in agreement. "Great!"

We spent the day relaxing happily and I met up again with the boys later in the day for a meal of fish, rice and vegetables. A comfortable silence settled over the team as we stuffed our face and relaxed in each other's company. It was a bit disconcerting actually being able to wind down in the presence of two spies but they had also became my team mates and more than once I had to remind myself the terrible things I knew Kabuto to be capable of. Also my love for my family, friends and village allowed me to stop any detrimental attachments to the psychopath. That's what I thought of him in my head; a murdering psychopath that would hurt the ones I cared about.

But the thing is I was a spy and so if I couldn't relax properly then they would know something was wrong. It's the most obvious sign of a spy; them being tightly on edge all the time. The fact I was so comfortable around my teammates probably diverted a significant amount of suspicions away. And the fact they underestimated me also probably helped a lot.

"So, Ando-sensei, I know we're a month or so away but the chunin exams…?" questioned Yoroi with his mouth full and barely understandable.

"Ah yes, Yoroi, this conversation was partly the reason why I suggested we have an extra night in town," our sensei said taking a bite of his food. "I wanted to discuss whether or not the whole team felt comfortable with entering the chunin exams." Ando-sensei looked at me for a moment longer than everyone else and I could tell he was addressing the team to spare me my pride.

Yoroi snorted. "Sensei, we are more than ready. How many time have you taken the exams now Kabuto?" Yoroi looked to his teammate with a twisted smile meant to mock the other man, but Kabuto wasn't even slightly affected. He just smiled his skin crawling smile.

"I don't recall an exact number," he said, pushing his glasses up his nose with his index finger. "But we've both taken them on a number of occasions." Yoroi grimaced at the reminder.

"Well I'm up for it!" I exclaimed, banging my fist on the table and smiling at my teammates. Ando-sensei looked dubiously at my confidence.

"Nana, you don't have to enter just because these two want to," he said gently, as if trying to gather the truth.

"No sensei, I believe Nana is more than ready to become a Chunin," Kabuto said kindly and smiled at me encouraging me.

'Kabuto," started Ando, "thank you for your opinion but-"

"Damn right!" I exclaimed and gave Kabuto a smile worth its weight in gold, as if out of appreciation for him supporting me. "I can't wait to prove to everyone that they were wrong!"

We had a few arguments after that but eventually Ando-sensei agree to think on (very strongly) the possibility of us doing the exam and we headed to bed that night thinking about the coming months.

In actual fact I was having a mini-heart attack. Had everything really escalated to the chunin exams already? _Shit…_ I felt very disconnected from the rest of the universe and sat up a significant amount of the night thinking about all the time I should have been doing something to make things better. Eventually I fell into a fitful sleep where I woke up on a number of occasions, unnerved by stalking nightmares I couldn't quite remember.

It was within one of these waking fits that I over heard my teammates movement in the next room.

"Are you sure Ando won't wake up?" I heard Yoroi ask in a whisper.

"I gave him and Nanami enough tranquilizer to knock out a horse," Kabuto replied, not making an effort to quiet down his voice. "But we should still move quickly to meet with the informant." I heard as the window was opened and the distinctive _whoosh_ and_ thud_ noises of two bodies jumping out a window and landing a safe distance away.

I gave them 20 seconds before I followed.

The surrounding area was mostly foliage and trees and thus there were many opportunities to stalk my teammates without being spotted. I masked my chakra, and as I didn't have very much to begin with it was an easy feat, and I blended into the shrubbery with ease and grace. All I had to do now then remain silent.

"You're late," I heard an unfamiliar, and yet obviously male, voice say. I found a well covered position between two trees and crouched down on the ground so I was completely hidden. I peered though the branches of a bush and saw as Kabuto, Yoroi and an unknown ninja with a mask and a Sound headband stood in a triangle formation. It was as if they were about to start a shoot off and were all obviously on edge.

"Well we have to be subtle as you know," Kabuto said with amusement, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"Do you have my scheduled information or are you wasting my time?" asked the Oto-nin.

"Tut, tut. Temper, temper," mocked Kabuto. "We have the information for _our _village. Or have you forgotten who it is you work for?"

"Of course not," said the ninja stoically and with acid.

"No I thought not. Otherwise the land of rice paddies would have another nameless body supplied by the Sound village." Yoroi laughed at Kabuto's callus threat and the Oto-nin took an unintended step back. "Or maybe I should suggest your removal from the chunin exams. It would be a shame for you not to be involved in something so important."

"I care little for your threats, you snake," he hissed.

"We have plenty of snakes within our village. I take that as a compliment." Kabuto didn't need to show this Ninja who was boss as it was plainly obvious he held all the cards while this nameless underling was worth nothing. Kabuto pulled out a scroll and threw it to the other ninja with a smirk.

"Maybe I could use you in a new experimental procedure. In the name of science, of course. It wouldn't take me 10 minutes to make something useful out of your pathetic life." Kabuto said these words pleasantly enough, as if in jest, but there was a real possibility that he had the skill and ability carry the threat through and the Oto-nin knew this to be true.

"Almost like we could head home and get the job done by morning as we're hardly an hour journey from the village," Yoroi said carelessly and with obvious desire to return to Oto.

This caused my mind to blank and I felt like hitting myself in the face. I couldn't believe I'd forgotten! The location of the Sound village was meant to be unknown to all but with my knowledge I was aware that it was in the land of Rice paddies. I really, _really _needed to consult my journal again. Memories fade as time goes on and I was no exception to this. Maybe I'd ask Inoichi about memory storing techniques…

_SNAP._

"What was that?" said the Oto-nin.

_Shit, I stepped on a twig._

Kabuto moved faster than I'd ever seen him before but knew him capable of, running towards the place where I was hiding. I moved out of the way as quickly as I could and sprinted back to the resort at an ungodly speed only available to ninja. I didn't hear anyone following me but I didn't relax my guard nonetheless.

I jumped through the window and climbed into my bed without pause. I closed my eyes and evened my breathing to shallow, far between breaths and pretended to be sleeping soundly. When Kabuto and Yoroi returned moments later they paused, muttered something to each other and returned to their beds without a sound. I didn't receive a wink of sleep for the rest of the night.

The next day I wrote down all that I had discovered during Kabuto and Yoroi's interaction with the Oto ninja and made sure not to forget a single point. I pretended nothing had happened and my team members didn't bring it up either. I did, however, give Kabuto a measured looked similar to the one he'd given me the day I'd met with Sasuke and Naruto. I was trying to communicate a sense of waiting; that I wouldn't do anything with the information until I knew it would benefit me in some way.

People like Kabuto could understand the idea of being able to buy someone out of their loyalty. Hopefully, he'd take the bone I threw him.

Obviously as soon as I had gotten home I reported the incident to Ibiki. The Oto ninja, the exchange of the scroll, my suspicions that Sound was located in rice paddies country, that something was going to go down during the Chunin exams and that they had been aware that I was watching them. I also slipped in, very gently, that from their talk of snakes and the initial interrogation that started this whole mess, my first thoughts were Orochimaru.

Overall, it was the moment we had been waiting for.

_Got you._

!

_Phase one is sufficient._

_Enact stage two and wait for further instruction._

_IB_

!

We'd returned from the mission a week ago. Yoroi was giving me odd looks, as if he was waiting for me to turn them in. Kabuto, however, was waiting for something else and it was obvious he didn't believe I'd tell anyone; after all, he wouldn't have let me live if he'd thought otherwise. I don't think it took them long to realize I hadn't told anyone about what I'd seen and this seemed to please Kabuto immensely.

Kabuto approached me on the following Friday. I'd made sure over the past week that I was frequently alone (not that that was difficult considering all my friends had disappeared being ninja) and it was on a day when I was sitting in the middle of the park on a bench pretending to have emotional problems. Well, maybe I wasn't pretending _that _much. Actually, Inoichi was round at the Nara's and he'd promised to try and give me _the talk_ again as it had been so long and I'd probably need an update – I mean what was there to update me on?! Thus, alone in the park – I was not having that conversation _ever again._

Also, I want to point out how messed up it was that they let children graduate from the academy and become _soldiers,_ but it's not until they actually hit puberty that people then start to talk and tell them about sex. Like really. I'd expressed this opinion to Inoichi and he'd looked at me strangely; the type of expression I came realize meant he'd love to try and get in my head. Apparently I had "weird" priorities.

Anyway stage two, if you were wondering, was to actively infiltrate, gain their trust and pretend 100% to be one of them and wait for the signal that said what further actions I should take. Before now it had been simple observations, with no leading question or probing of any kind.

"Nanami!" I heard someone call my name. I turned around and saw Kabuto walking towards me smiling pleasantly. "Are you alright?" He said giving me a gentle, concerned look. The faked kindness, as it always did, caused shivers to run up my spin.

"Yeah, I guess," I replied in the teenagest, angst voice I could manage. I thought for a moment I was over doing it but then I remembered that teenagers actually were that dramatic.

"That doesn't sound convincing," Kabuto acknowledged as he'd sat beside me on the bench. "I've noticed you've been spending a lot of time by yourself?"

"Well, I just..." I blinked rapidly as if I was getting rid of unwanted tears and turned my head away from him. "It's nothing," I said quickly and stood up just as fast as if I was attempting to seem nonchalant but really failing.

"I know you hate this place," said Kabuto. He was still sitting on the bench and looking toward the setting sun. "I hate this place too. It's to… perfect. Nothing is this perfect." He pushed his glasses up his nose and it caught in the reflection of the sun and gave him a sinister look. He didn't look to me to see if I was still standing there, he just knew I would be listening.

"Too perfect," I repeated, snorting at his words. "What else is there? There's no where to go." I remained standing, looking down at Kabuto with a frown but I shook my head as if clearing a stupid thought and turned to walk away. However, I was once again stopped by Kabuto's softly spoken words.

"Why didn't you turn us in?" he asked. I froze on the spot as if I were a dear caught in headlights – but really; it had been what I was waiting for.

I turned around sharply and saw that Kabuto was no longer sitting on the bench; in fact he was standing right behind me. The kindly look he liked to wear was gone and replacing it were cold eyes that seemed to be able to see right through me.

I almost panicked. I knew exactly what Kabuto was capable of and I had a sudden thought that if I said the wrong thing he could kill me without much difficulty at all. I'd put up a fight, but the end result would be my death and him walking away.

I almost regretted being alone with him. But I had my mission parameters and I would follow through.

"I didn't deem it necessary," I told him with stoic composure that leaked uneasiness at him being in such proximity. Kabuto didn't say anything, but waited for me to continue and looked down at me in a way that was intimidating.

"I've had my suspicions for a while now," I muttered, slowing swallowing but maintaining my bravado. "I did learn a thing or two while I was within Torture and Interrogation and I could tell you were hiding something. Your little slip up on the mission just confirmed them."

"Who says it was a slip?" Kabuto raised his chin and gave me an accessing look coupled with a superior smirk.

"It wasn't?" I asked with genuine surprise. That had been a risky move on his part then but I guess I played my part well enough for him to be confident in my ability to forsake my clan and village.

"We've had our eyes on you for a while. I saw a little bit of potential. Was I right?" Kabuto's eyes were hidden by the glare of his glasses but I could imagine the suspicious slits attempting to gage and analyse the truths of what I was saying.

We stared each other down in silence, but it wasn't long until I cracked. It was as if a sudden thought burst from my mind that I could no longer hold onto, and I dropped all formality and out right exclaimed my deepest wish. "Take me on. I want to come and work for you."

Kabuto smirked triumphenty as if he'd just won a game. "And who do you think I am, that you'd want to work for me?"

"I know your more than what you say you are."

"Oh you do, do you?" His polite mask slipped back onto his face and I could tell his was laughing at the naive little girl that was begging for his tutorage.

"You're a spy for Oto," I whispered, leaning in and glancing around as if to make sure no one was around. He just grew more and more amused by my theatrics.

"And why would you want to work for Oto? What about Konoha?"

"I don't care about this stupid village," I spat with more venom than I had intended.

"You don't, do you? Well, what could you offer _my _village?"

I looked down and frowned slightly, trying to fabricate reasons why I would make a useful asset. "I'm smart and tough. I can learn quickly."

"From what I've seen so far you'd just be a liability." Kabuto looked at me without amusement once again and then shook his head as in disappointment. "Maybe this wasn't such a good-"

"No, I'd be useful! Let me prove myself. Please." I leaned forward on my tip toes with eagerness and then, as if I'd caught myself doing some very silly, I fell backwards again and held my chin high but with obvious embarrassment as if saying 'Hyuuga don't beg'. Kabuto let out a small chuckle.

"Why are you so desperate to come and work for me?"

"My clan just see me as a piece of meat that could be useful for some political gain, and when I do something not to their liking its like I'm no longer a human being." This was so close to the truth that my stomach clenched at actually saying the words out loud. "My village are the same and my closest friends don't even want to know me." That one was more of a lie and it made my stomach uncurl a tiny bit. "Loyalty is over rated. I want power and to prove I'm not their tool."

Lies I could deal with. I had been living and breathing lies for as long as I had been in this world. From the moment my memories had returned and I knew the fate of all my friends and family, to the curse seal that I had to hide from the world, to then being placed in Torture and Interrogation and being taught to pretend and manipulate, and even now acting as the doting, eager team mate who would do anything to leave the village. Lies I could deal with, but it was the hard home truths and the painfully cold look I saw in the mirror every morning that were getting harder and harder to manage.

So I buried them in more lies.

Kabuto gave me one last evaluation with his eyes and then turned on his heel and strolled away as if we'd just been noting the colour of the sky and not questioning loyalty and betraying villages.

"Well?" I called out to him in frustration.

"The chunin exams," he said without looking back. "That's where you'll prove yourself."

!

The next day I received a mission briefing scroll from an ANBU operative with the mask of a weasel, who personally delivered it in the dead of night. It was unexpected at first but when I saw the contents I understood immediately – and not with the smallest amount of unease. Yoda had found something on his mission that was a game changer and things needed to be accelerated.

The message was as follows:

_Change of plans. _

_Advance to the second stage of the chunin exams and eliminate target._

_IB_

_!_

**This is 13300 words… it is the longest chapter I have ever created. I thought about splitting it into two parts but I was just so proud of it I thought I'd share the whole thing. And I'm sure you guys wanted to know what would happen next.**

**Thank you for all your reviews! I read and cherish every single one. As I haven't uploaded a chapter in quite a while I had forgotten about that giddy feeling you get when you receive a review so seriously thank you for your continued support. I had a lot of questions in the reviews so I hope I cleared a few things up in that last chapter (and I've probably created a thousands more questions – BRING THEM ON!) Hehe :3**

**I'm so excited to write the next one as it will be the chunin exams and I have some very nice plans for our main character. I feel so sorry for her just thinking about it. Does anyone else have this horrible feeling in his or her stomach every time something goes horribly wrong for Nanami? The poor dear, I want everything to work out for her – truly I do.**

**Please excuse any spelling and grammar. I've tried to reduce the collatoral damage but I'm sure things slip me by a lot of the time! I can't promise an update date but I'll try my hardest! Please let me know what you think and until next time my fabulous readers!**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

!

_"__When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."_ - Abraham Lincoln

_"__This life, which had been the tomb of his virtue and of his honor, is but a walking shadow; a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more: it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." - _William Shakespeare

!

Who the hell thought it was a good idea for me to eliminate a target?! And Kabuto at that! He had been able, on many occasions, to fight against _prodigy _level shinobi, take on sanin and was comparatively on par with Kakashi. I wasn't sure if it was a good thing or not I'd been able to refer to my journal at this point. I guess it was the age old question of 'would you want to know if you're walking to your death or not?'.

I knew and it was horrible.

I told the ANBU operative to give me a minute to form a reply as my breathing picked up and my eyes were wide with shock. I searched around my temporary room with panic, trying to locate a pen and paper, and in my haste I ended up tearing apart the room.

Actually I think the destruction was rather therapeutic. Eventually I found what I was looking for and wrote out a rather vicious reply about how much of a bad idea I thought Ibiki's plan was. I gave the message to Weasel, who had watched my emotional rampage with no comment, and he glanced over the note quickly.

Weasel paused, looked back up at me and then looked down again.

"Are you sure?" questioned a familiar voice, that I couldn't quite put a face to, as the ANBU looked back at me with intensity. I just put my hand on my hip and took a sigh.

"I'm going to die either way," I muttered with a desolate aura.

Weasel tilted his head to the side as if assessing me but didn't say anything else. He rolled up the paper, tucked it in his belt and was gone before I could blink twice.

I didn't sleep that night.

The next day Ando-sensei took Kabuto and Yoroi on a mission that required men only. During this time I was instructed to take advantage of the few days alone to do some research in the library about past Chunin exams so I at least had an idea of what to expect.

"What to expect?" I questioned Ando-sensei in confusion until the dots connected in my head and I bounced on the balls of my feet in excitement. "Wait, does that mean…?"

Ando-sensei patted me on the head in amusement and confirmed that; yes, I was going to part take in the chunin exams alongside Kabuto and Yoroi. He seemed genuinely proud of me in that moment.

I was 100% aware of what I was in for so instead of researching the exams I went to the very back of the library where no one could see or hear me and did something that I hadn't done in a while; I read. Every book in rows UV to ZZ were so old they had a thick layer of dust and I picked four at random from four different shelve that looked the oldest and most top secret.

I didn't believe they actually held anything overly secret but there was always a chance. I sat in a corner and examined my choices.

"Top secret" included a book on poisons in the south of the land of snow, a book on the digestive system of farm animals, a book on the ancient tea ceremonies of the village hidden in Whirlpools (with up to date pictures, which was pretty impressive since the village had disappeared decades ago) and a book on Irrigation in high attitude regions, within which the middle had been cut out and hidden inside there was a hip flask filled with god-knew-how-old scotch whiskey. I was pleasantly surprised by this discovery as I had no idea that this world had anything of the type and so I tucked it away in my kunai pouch to enjoy at a later date (you know, incase I was having a really bad day).

The time alone was nice and I forgot for a little while about all the expectations and stupid pressures that suffocated me with the impact of my choices and decisions. I was just Nana for a little while.

I felt really, truly happen as I sat on the floor all alone in the world. The old books smelled like _home_. Not the Hyuuga compound or anything in this world, but my home back on planet earth. They say that the strongest memory you possess is smell and when I took a breath of the old books essence, I was taken back to a place I'd almost forgotten about. And although an uncontrollable amount of nostalgia past through me at the scent it was the happy kind where you were glad you got an experience, even if it was finished and gone.

I swallowed down a well of emotion and simply, truly relaxed, for the first time in many years.

"You're on a top secret internal assignment and you're sitting at the back of the library in the oldest part of the building reading about…" a hand reach down and picked up one of the books lying by my feet. "…Tea ceremonies? " Ibiki scoffed and threw the book carelessly but I reached out and caught it before it hit the floor.

"These are very old books you know," I told my boss, 'tutting' at his disrespect for the literature. I looked up at my sensei with a frown and a purse of the lips.

"Oh, you're angry at me, are you?" he asked, snorting at my expression and shaking his head.

"I'm being a teenager, go away," I told him, hiding behind the book I was reading and pretending I was alone again.

"So I've heard." I glanced at Ibiki and gave a huff of annoyance, which seemed to greatly amuse him, but apart from that I remained silent. We stayed staring at each other like that for a few minutes but I refused to be the one to break the awkward silence and so it was eventually Ibiki who gave in.

"I believe you can do it," he said with a stern look I'd seen Hizashi display on numerous occasions, it meant 'I'm trying to give you support but I'm emotionally constipated'.

"That's nice," I muttered, not playing his game and wanting to return to my alone time.

"You can more than-" he reasoned but I cut him off.

"He is a jounin class shinobi!" I hissed trying to be quiet, still aware that we were in a library even if it was right at the back. I closed the book in my hand aggressively and stood up with sharp, angry motions. "I couldn't complete an interrogation on a chunin within an enclosed, controlled environment with my partner at my back without getting my arm broken. And you want me to complete an assassination mission to kill an A-rank criminal?!"

Ibiki gave me an assessing stare. "So that's what this is about," said the man, partly to himself.

"No Ibiki-sensei, it's about me knowing myself enough to realize I am no match for Kabuto." We were caught in a stare off once again but this time it was me who broke it off with a deep breath as I pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger. "Listen and trust me. We need a game plan and I'll need back up."

"We can't have any more shinobi working on this not when-" he caught himself and realized he'd almost shared information of an extremely secretive nature.

"What happened then? What did Yoda gather information about?" I asked with a sharp look. His gaze was equally as piercing.

"His report confirmed your speculations," Ibiki said, revealing everything but nothing at the same time. Not that I needed to know the information he withheld, as I was already aware of the general goings on of the next few months.

"And the chunin exams?" I wanted to know how much they knew.

"Be on your guard," he warned, which told me they knew enough to be prepared for the coming invasion. I nodded to my sensei but didn't stand down.

"I just need one extra person," I said quickly. "Presumably ANBU. Presumably Weasel." Ibiki gave me an odd look when I requested that.

"What about Yoda?"

"Well, is he back yet?" I asked with high levels of sarcasm. He hadn't come to see me, which meant that he most certainly was not back. Ibiki gave a distasteful expression as if I knew more than I should – he always had that expression, the man was obsessed with secrets.

"Why Weasel?"

"Positive vibes, you know?" I shrugged. "Besides, he watched me trash my entire room without saying a word. Must have patience worthy of a Hokage."

Ibiki rubbed his eyes with his hand and took a deep breath that was almost a prayer for _him _to gain more patience. "I can't pull him out of rotations for you before the exams. But I can make sure he's around incase things don't go to plan."

"That's all I need." I let out a breath and felt my shoulders relax at having gotten what I wanted. "Come on, you expected me to ask for an army and I'm only asking for one man."

"You know who he is don't you?" Ibiki said with no real anger, just exasperated amusement. I smirked and remained silent. "So what _is_ you plan?"

"Who says I've got a plan?"

"You're being very difficult today."

"I'm blaming all my problems on you at the moment. You're getting off lightly."

Ibiki hmm'd in agreement and lent against the wall and answered my question. "You wouldn't have sent me such a provocative letter and requested such back up if you didn't already have an idea of what you were going to do – or at least a foundation."

I reached onto the floor and picked up one of the books scattered about and handed it to my sensei with an unnerving smile. "It's just an idea and I'll need help…"

!

I did my business at Yamanaka flower shop under the steady and disapproving gaze of Inoichi.

"Why are you buying that?" questioned Inoichi with a displeased frown. "If brewed correctly it could be a destabilizing narcotic."

I hummed in acknowledgment but I didn't answer his question.

"And why did you request Water-Hemlock?" asked my ex-sensei with another frown as he hovered over my shoulder. "You know this is poisonous, right? Really, really poisonous."

"Dad, leave Nana alone," muttered Ino, who was sitting at the counter flicking through a magazine.

"I'm worried about you, you know?" said the Yamanaka clan head as he scratched his scalp in puzzlement.

"Oh hush," I mumbled barely paying attention to Inoichi's fussing.

"Choza said you'd gone to him and asked for a book on creating your own food pills. If you mix those two ingredients together than it would be a very quick death, you know?" He placed his hand on his chin in contemplation with a nod.

I walked to the counter and passed my purchases to Ino.

"And Shikaku said you were gathering something in the Nara forest, but he didn't know what. Said you were all 'cloaks and daggers' about it?"

I paused. "Cloaks and daggers?" I said both surprised and confused. "Did Shikaku really say those exact words?"

"Well, no. He said you were being secretive…" Indeed I had been gathering some ingredients in the Nara forest, and Shikaku said as long as I didn't disturb the deer I was welcome to take as much as I liked (in moderation). But I hadn't informed him of what I'd taken.

"So where did you hear that saying then?" I asked. The words translated into Japanese very poorly and sounded odd and were definitely a saying from my old life. So where did…?

"From you. You say a lot of weird things, you know?"

"Don't repeat what I say."

"But I'm trying to get down with the kids," Inoichi protested, as if this were the most valid reason in the world.

A loud _thud _echoed through the room and the Yamanaka clan head and I looked towards Ino in concern. She had hit her head against the desk in pure horror. "Oh Kami," Ino muttered into the wood as if trying to gather strength from it.

"Dad, listen to me," Ino said with a deep breath. "One, don't try and 'get down with the kids'. Ever. Two, if you do try then don't ever repeat anything you have heard from Nana. She knows a little as you about being cool."

"Hey I'm cool!" protested Ino's father. I just snorted and handed the money to Ino who took it with a shake of the head. I left shortly after that feeling more secure since I now had some of the ingredients to enact my plan.

"You still haven't answered me," called a voice from the shop door I'd just walked out of. "Why all the ingredients?" I turned around to see all the humor was gone from Inoichi's expression and he was deathly serious.

I gave a long-suffering sigh and looked at him with annoyance.

"Can't you guess?" I said trying to lighten the mood again, but this just caused his jaw to clench and he took a step forward and stood to his full height.

"I don't like it. But, afterwards… I'll be here if you want to talk." My ex-sensei looked me somberly in the eyes and I felt my throat constrict with emotion. I just nodded dumbly and left without another word.

!

The chunin exam's came around quickly and before I knew it I was standing outside the academy with Yoroi and Kabuto on my either side.

"Are you ready then?" asked Kabuto, looking at me out of the corner of his eye.

_No. _"Lets do this," I said with false bravado.

Yoroi lips stretched into a menacing grin. "Yes. Lets."

We entered the academy and went through the appropriate door to the room designated as the chunin exams waiting room. Kabuto led us to the left, just inside the door, so that it would be easy to talk to and interact with anybody who came in. There were around 14 other teams there already but I knew there were many more to come. As predicted more and more people showed up including a particular Oto ninja team.

"Kabuto…?" I asked with a frown. The medic looked over to me absently and smiled when he saw who I was looking at.

"Ahh yes. It looks like the Sound village are entering a team this year," he commented lightly causing Yoroi to snort unattractively.

"Any good?" I looked over to my teammate and watched him draw out some of his data cards and flick three in my direction. The stats that he gave me on the three shinobi were just into chunin level and so I really wasn't surprised that they had only just managed to be defeated by team 7 who were not yet out of genin-hood. But things might not play that way again and with any luck a few sprouting problems would be nipped in the bud before they could even bloom. I gave an unintelligible sound in acknowledgement and flicked the cards back to Kabuto.

Five seconds later three Suna genin walked in and all present instantly quieted down. I recognized them instantly from their very unsubtle physical attributes. They stood in the door, assessed the competition, and then took a seat on the same side of the room as us. There was a weight that followed them through the door and hung in the air around like something stale. Tamari and Kakuro sat on a bench while Gaara remained standing like a statue whose eyes followed you around the room where ever you went. No body said it, but there was a general agreed consensus amongst the genin present that they wouldn't test this guy if they came across him in the exam.

I could practically feel the smugness roll off Kabuto in waves.

"What about them?" I asked him.

"You'll see," he muttered as his eyes glanced to the door again.

Team 8 and 10 came in together and I diverted my eyes in case Hinata tried to come over and talk to me as if nothing were wrong within the clan. I was scared it might give Kabuto the impression I couldn't be trusted if he thought I were too close with her. I'd already warned Shikamaru not to be too familiar with me during the exams to which he gave me an odd look but agreed to comply and warn his friends.

Team 9, Neji's team, followed moments later. My brother looked the mirror image of my father and had shot up significantly in the last few months I hadn't seen him. He tried to divert his team away from us but failed when I caught Rock Lee's eye accidently.

"Yosh, it is my esteemed team mates sister, Hyuuga Nanami. How good it is to see you again!" Rock lee bowed to me and I let an awkward chuckle out as I caught my brother's sour expression over his shoulder.

"Nice to see you to Lee," I acknowledge with a polite bow.

"Lee come on," Tenten muttered not making eye contact with me, grabbing the green clad ninja's arm and pulling him away from us. Tenten obviously knew some of the tensions that were in play behind closed doors and was, rightfully, siding with Neji. It made my heart a little lighter to know that Neji at least had a few close friends that cherished him.

When Naruto entered the room he did it with gusto and exuberance I would expect from the excitable blond, declaring team 7 the winner and that everybody better keep a close eye on them throughout the exams. Team 8 and 10 joined team 7 by the door and the nine genin started to loudly converse.

"Sasuke-kun!" I heard Ino scream with excitement. "I've missed you so much!"

"Hey back off Ino-pig he's mine!" Sakura shouted with as much venom as her squeaky voice would allow.

"You might not want to be so loud," Kabuto suggested, approaching the group. I hadn't even noticed him move.

"Well who asked you?" Ino complained. "Who are you anyway?"

"Yakushi Kabuto," he said with his usual creepy charm. I saw recognition flash in Shikamaru and Hinata's eyes at the name and they searched the crowd for my face.

"Kabuto, aye?" asked Naruto, crossing his arms over his chest. When he glanced at me across the room he seemed to suddenly remember something, relaxed significantly and gave Kabuto a very warm expression. "Oh your Nanami's teammate! You know since she got kicked out of Torture and Interrogation for failing and killing that guy because she was enjoying it too much."

There was dead silence surrounding all in hearing distance and I closed my eyes so that kami may give me strength. I looked at the oblivious blond with a dead expression that caused the boy to blush and look slightly impish.

"Naruto," I hissed through gritted teeth as I stood up from next to Yoroi and stormed over to him. "Please don't say that so _loud._" Naruto took a step back involuntarily and forced a laugh, brushing off my anger, but I saw Sakura and Sasuke flick their wrists slightly as if preparing themselves incase I lashed out at their teammate. I couldn't help but feel deeply offended that they would think I would actually hurt Naruto.

Kabuto laughed at my discomfort and continued to egg on the kids and show them his ninja info cards. Pretending I didn't see their distrust I looked around the room and found a number of pairs of eyes trained on me. I glared them down until they looked away.

_They all seem… intimidated? Of little old me? Well shucks._

I felt one particularly cold pair fixated on the back of my head and turned around to try and locate the assailant. When my eyes met Gaara's I suppressed a shiver, held his eyes for a few seconds, and then turned my head to concentrate on what Kabuto was doing.

Gaara's eyes had seemed hollow and unnerving and very, very sad. I looked to Naruto as he shouted in amazement about what Kabuto was telling them and I hoped beyond hope that the blond boy could save Gaara from himself once again.

I noticed, momentarily, a few of the rookie nine look at me with caution in their eyes and I tried to tell myself that because it was all an act for the mission I didn't mind their distrustful stares. After a few more moments of listening to Kabuto explain whom the Sand team were I decided to leave and return to my seat next to Yoroi, feeling down trodden and bitter.

"What was that about?" he asked mildly curious.

"Nothing," I spat, and he left it at that.

!

The first exam was boring and pointless from my point of view. As soon as Ibiki walked into the room everybody went quiet and the fight that had started (somehow, I really don't understand how because, seriously, I had been there like three seconds ago) between Kabuto and the Sound ninja halted instantly. Ibiki instructed us about the goings on of the exams and told us to collect a number and that it should direct us to our seats for the first task.

When no one moved to collect a number he threatened the room with no one passing the exams at all and suddenly there was a mad dash from every genin to find their seats.

When Kabuto came storming over to us with a slightly miffed expression Yoroi and I wisely remained silent and together we approached one of the chunin handing out the pieces of paper. I was, unsurprisingly, seated at the opposite side of the room to Kabuto and Yoroi next to… Gaara?

I was sitting next to Gaara.

The young boy looked up at me with his dead, cold eyes and I just nodded in return. For the entire time we were seated next to each other we pretended the other didn't exist. It was nice.

Ibiki told us the rules of the exam about cheating and failing and then gave us an hour to complete the test. And so we began.

In short, it was long and boring. I rested my head on the desk and didn't put a single thing down for the whole hour. At one point I saw Ibiki glaring at me, and the look would have probably made any other genin shake in fear, but I ignored him in favor of staring at the ceiling tiles.

When the hour finished and we were given the ultimatum of answering the last question but risking never becoming chunin in our lives if we got it wrong half the room emptied and only 26 of the original teams still remained. At one point I was jolted from my half slumber state when Naruto jumped on the desk and exclaimed how he was going to be Hokage no matter what Ibiki said.

The exam ended with all those remaining passing and Ibiki showing off his scars. I rolled my eyes at my sensei, as I knew how much he enjoyed unsettling people like that.

When Mitarashi Anko crashed through the wall even I was a little surprised; both at her appearance and her dramatic entrance that could rival even Naruto's love of showmanship.

We were told to meet at training ground 44 the next day at midday and to be prepared (which could mean a number of things, I mean really).

The second chunin exam was to begin in less than 24 hours. I was ready for this.

!

Okay maybe not so ready. The forest was scary and my teammates gave off a significantly more sinister vibe than normal. It was unnerving.

When we came out of the first exam we had been bombarded by questions and enthusiasm from Ando-sensei. The permanently worried Jounin had obviously been on the edge of his seat for the entirety of the exam and I made an extra special effort to calm his frazzled nerves.

That night he took us out for a meal at the BBQ Akimichi restaurant and gave us a huge pep-talk about how 'this was the time that you are going to become chunin!'

"Ando-sensei, how long have you been Kabuto and Yoroi's sensei?" I asked innocently. Kabuto gave me a sideways look but I ignored him, my attention on Ando.

"Hmm, maybe 2 years now?" Ando-sensei said thoughtlessly. He then went onto worry himself some more over something trivial and even went as far as to ask how my menstruation cycle was doing.

"It's fine. Stop talking about it," I hissed but there wasn't any real venom behind my words. At hearing Ando-sensei's long-term teaching role I felt the pit in my stomach grow deeper and deeper. I knew that Kabuto and Yoroi were spies, but they were also Ando's students. If things went to plan I would have to inform my teacher about me slaughtering his students and having been an undercover operative the whole time.

We fell into a comfortable silence after that as we all enjoyed the food and thought about the coming exam; that was until our sensei gave an awkward cough. "Nanami, as it is your first time taking the chunin exams I've gotten you a little something."

Ando reached to the floor and picked up a small, long package about the length of two hand widths. "When Yoroi and Kabuto entered their first chunin exams with me I also got them a little something as well," he said handing me the present excitably and then he began wringing his hands together nervously. "It isn't much, but I thought it would save you a bit of weight."

Indeed the present was very light and, flashing a quick smile at my sensei, I began to tear away the paper with exuberance. My breath caught in my throat as I looked down at what could only be called a beautiful piece of craftsmanship.

"It's an extendible boe staff," Ando said still wringing his hands. "You just flick this catch here and it extends to the six foot staffs you're used to." I tried the catch, holding it above my head so I didn't hit anything, and the staff flew outwards quickly and smoothly. The white oak of the staff was lighter than my previous ones of such a nature but somehow felt significantly more sturdy and dependable - probably because it was given to me with such good intentions. I felt my eyes start to water involuntarily.

"Thanks sensei," I mumbled, genuinely touched by his thoughtfulness. "I'll use it tomorrow." My teacher just gave me a pat on the back in encouragement and we returned to our food quietly.

Ando-sensei sent us on our merry way relatively early so that we could rest ourselves as much as possible before the following days exams. I hardly slept that night as I thought about what I would have to do the next day and so when I turned up to the forest of death at midday my team couldn't help but comment on how awful I looked.

"Nana, if you were nervous you could have asked me to give you something," Kabuto said with a frown of annoyance.

"Don't worry yourself so much," I said sarcastically, "I won't slow you down."

We waited for around 10 minutes and right on twelve o'clock Anko turned up and started trying to intimidate all those taking the exam. She seemed to be having a pretty fun time of it to until a grass ninja crept up behind Anko and extended her tongue out to hand the proctor back a Kunai she had flung into the crowd. The whole thing was pretty disgusting and creeped me out a little bit.

_I mean who has a tongue like that?! I don't care what jutsu it gives you…Wait, that's Orochimaru. Of course it is!_

When I looked over to Kabuto he seemed to be both amused and exasperated. Apparently he disagreed with some of Orochimaru's more eccentric quirks. I swallowed subtly and thanked the heavens above that I'd prepared for this situation. The probability of Orochimaru turning up to the second exam had been extremely high only due to the fact Kabuto was still in his original position working as a spy for Sound – I was relieved I hadn't inadvertently changed anything there. This time I would bet my life the snake face wasn't going to get out of the exam completely unscathed.

We signed the disclaimer forms, were handed our scroll and then were led to our own individual gate that surrounded the forest of death. We waited with baited breath for the exam to start and as soon as the doors opened we sprinted in as fast as we could move as a unit.

"So what's the plan?" I asked when we had been running for a good quarter of an hour. "I'm guessing the game that _we're_ playing isn't as simple as the proctor said?" I looked around the forest with distaste. It wasn't called the forest of death for nothing. It smelt like decay and looked even more putrid and it made a small amount of bile rise to the back of my throat. "This place is disgusting," I commented.

"You got that right kid," Yoroi agreed, kicking away some green moss that started moving up his leg. "So Kabuto?"

"He'll have made contact by now," Kabuto muttered to himself as if forgetting we were even there.

"Who?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

Kabuto looked to me in amusement. "You'll find out soon enough," he said. He pushed his glasses up his nose with a smug expression. "Lets stick around for a bit, make up camp and we'll start properly in a few days." I looked at the man skeptically and he looked back as if asking me if I had anything to say about his decision.

I wisely kept my mouth shut and this seemed to please him. "I think you'll do well in Oto, Nanami," said the medic before he jumped of the branch and started to head due east. I exchanged another disgusted look with Yoroi but he quickly followed behind Kabuto and I moved to follow him so that we were moving in single file and I was at the back.

It was as we were running that I caught a glance of an ANBU mask. Just a glimpse but enough for Weasel to let me know that he was there and watching me – that he had my back. However, that wasn't why I'd asked for his presence.

You might think me arrogant but I knew that with my well-developed plan and Kabuto's trust I could carry out the assassination by myself. All I needed to do was get him to eat one of the food pills I'd made.

I'd be fine. Team 7 on the other hand could use his help.

Using Konoha field unit hand signals, moving my fingers skillfully behind my back, I transcribed the message.

_TEAM 7. DANGER. SNAKE. GO._

Hey, it was technically my operation. I could order him around if I wanted; ANBU captain or not.

I couldn't be 100% sure that Weasel had followed my instructions, but Uchiha Sasuke and the kyuubi container were in a high-risk situation that involved an S-class missing-nin. Weasel knew his priorities.

We stopped when the sun started to get lower in the sky and found a well-covered area, near to a water source and plenty of foliage, to set up camp. This was where I would enact my plan. It wasn't really even much of a plan at this point; all I had to do was enact the killing blow.

If all went well then by morning I would have killed my teammates and be placed onto a path that I could never turn away from. What was even more worrying in my mind was that I was still playing my part and pretending to be these peoples teammate. Disloyalty sat uneasily in my stomach but my hands didn't even shake at the idea of taking another humans life.

We had been relaxing for a few hours and I was lying on the ground, looking up at the canopy of trees, when I heard Yoroi start to go through his bag.

"Hey, Kabuto, where are those food pills of yours? I'm starving," Yoroi complained, digging deeper into his backpack.

"They're here," said a voice from right behind me. "Nana, help yourself." Kabuto held out his pouch of food pills to me expectantly and for a split second I thought he might suspect.

"Thanks," I said casually as I sat up and took one of the balls of food, about the size of a golf ball. Both members were looking at me strangely as I held the pill in my hand. I looked back at them with a frown. "What?"

"Nothing, just making sure you like them," said the medic-nin.

"Why, what's special about them?" I questioned, remaining calm. There is no way he would know, right?

"Oh nothing, there just the ones I make myself,"

"Yeah, I know," I said shaking my head as if he were being stupid. "I've had them before." And with that I took a bite of the pill and layback down to continue staring at the canopy.

Inside I was shitting myself. He was suspicious of my intentions. There must be some reason he thought the pills might be spiked – I wonder what could have caused that. I know for a fact that none of my body language had given it away. Maybe he was just suspicious by nature and got the least important member of the team to try the food first. Who knew?

After a few minutes when I didn't start convulsing and dying they deemed the pills safe and began to help themselves. Out of the corner of my eye I watched the spies eat two pills each. Good.

The poison should take effect within 15 minutes.

"Those pill's leave a strange after taste," Yoroi commented as he sat drinking water from his canister, relaxing since he was no longer hungry. "Hey Kabuto, are you sure they were in date-"

I heard Yoroi give a cough, and then a weaker cough. And then nothing.

Kabuto stood to check what was wrong with his teammate as I continued staring at the canopy. "He's unconscious," Kabuto said with genuine confusion. "What could have-" Kabuto cut himself off with an aggressive cough that lasted for a few seconds. I took his moment of inattention to move to my feet and stand in a battle ready position, prepared for what would come next. When Kabuto moved his hand away from his mouth and found blood his expression change to one of disappointment and deep amusement. He chuckled.

"Poison," Kabuto acknowledged with a nod, seemingly not affected by having consumed a deadly substance. "When did you swap our food packs?"

"Yesterday," I told him without emotion.

"I must say I expected more from you," commented the spy as he lazily stood to his feet.

"You didn't expect anything from me, don't lie. I was a pawn in a game far bigger than I could ever comprehend." I looked Kabuto up and down to try and gauge with the pill was working on him.

"I had a feeling you might turn on me. Tell me, was it difficult knowing you were going to kill your teammates?" asked the spy lazily. I didn't answer his question. "You ate the pills to. I'm guessing you took the antidote before?"

I nodded absentmindedly as I surveyed his state.

"And you fed it to Yoroi as well. He's not dead, only sleeping. I must say this attack feels rather personal." Kabuto coughed again and a dribble of blood trickled from the corner of his mouth.

I could tell he was weakening slightly from the affects of the poison and was trying not to show it, but if I engaged him then it still wouldn't be enough for me to finish the job. He was still too strong.

Kabuto took my assessment as confusion at why he wasn't dying. "Poison won't work on me you know," he laughed lightly and a bit tiredly. "And you've also put sedatives in the pills? Clever, but I can easily get rid of that too." As he spoke his body began to glow very slightly. "Although I'm weakened, the drug will be out of my system very soon. I'm a high class medical ninja and expelling poison from my body is child's play."

Kabuto took a step forward with a triumphant expression and I could see he was gaining his strength again step by step. But I didn't panic; I would just have to improvise until the third drug within the pills kicked in. There was a particularly deranged look in Kabuto's eye as he launched at me and I barely managed to scramble to the side in time to miss his strike. When I looked back I saw that his chakra infused hand exactly where my chest had been moments before.

I reached onto my back and grabbed my new extendable boe staff Ando-sensei had given me before the exam. As I brought it over my head I flicked the clip and the staff extended quickly, allowing me to point the weapon in front of my body to slow down Kabuto's approach.

Kabuto quickly gathered his bearings and threw a kunai in my direction that I blocked with the movement of my staff.

"So, you've been playing us a fool. You can use that piece of wood after all?" laughed Kabuto. "It won't save you though." The medical ninja began to attack me with glowing, green hands again and I tried to the best of my ability to keep him at bay.

_Just a little bit longer… just a little bit._

I swiped my staff beneath Kabuto's feet but he jumped the weapon easily and instead his hand moved to grab my shoulder. I ducked down under his grab and sent a pointy, aggressive elbow into the rather soft bones of the rib cage just on the edge of the diaphragm and felt a smug satisfaction when I heard the customary _crunch _of snapping bones.

Kabuto didn't even seem to notice the pain and instead, with a chakra scalpel on the tip of his finger, he tried to slash across my neck.

I spun around aggressively to avoid the sharp object that was inches away from severing my head from my body. However, in my exuberance to get away I left my left side open and Kabuto, obviously predicting this, moved his arm down to strike at the femoral artery within my leg. I didn't have time to think, I just acted and attempted to kick with my left foot to get his hand away before he could do any irreversible damage.

Unfortunately my kick missed and Kabuto's chakra scalpel passed straight through my ankle. I didn't feel anything for a moment, not entirely realizing what had happened, but when I went to put my foot on the ground it seemed completely unable to take my weight and I fell back with as much grace as a sack of beans.

Before I hit the floor Kabuto reached out and grabbed onto my ninja headband I liked to keep around my neck and pulled me forward so our faces almost touched.

"Did you really think you could win?" sneered the teen with a twisted smile. Kabuto brought his chakra scalpel up to my neck and ever so slightly drew a thin line across my skin. I could feel the peals of blood slowly dribble down my neck and an irritable, stinging sensation clawed its way up my throat. "It's funny how fragile the skin is that we humans should bleed so easily. I've hardly even broken the skin and yet here you are getting blood all down your front."

True enough I could feel it running down my shirt and when Kabuto brought his chakra infused hand up to my neck once again I attempted to pull away. But, being in a child's body up against an adult Kabuto, it was clear he had significantly superior strength and my efforts were in vain.

"I've worked for Konoha as a spy for many years but now I work for one man; Orochimaru. Yes, it is that very Sanin who is behind all of this. He-" Kabuto cut himself off suddenly with a sharp, panicked intake of breath.

I smiled as his pupils dilated; the third drug had set in.

I saw him rapidly blink in confusion and he released his hold on me involuntarily as he shook his head and stumbled backwards. I fell to the floor in a heap and placed a hand over my neck to stem the gentle bleeding. He looked at his hands in amazement and then to me with unhidden awe.

"What is this?" questioned the man with deep breaths.

"You know, it wasn't just poison in those pills," I commented lightly, pulling myself up using a nearby tree and standing on one leg. "That was only a distraction."

"A distraction – from what?" Kabuto looked around him in panic and stumbled to the floor. In his state of fear he threw a hefty load of shrunken into a tree and grappled at his kunai with thick, clumsy fingers. "What is this?! Get it away!"

"Magic," I whispered. With these words I launched myself at the confused medic, kunai in my left hand and I held onto his neck in a choking lock. Without hesitation or even time to think I plunged the kunai up into his left eye and twisted. He screamed out in pain for a moment until the sound was suddenly cut off by a sharp object penetrating his grey matter and, literally, picking apart his brain.

Yakushi Kabuto fell onto the floor in a heap of blood and bones and was no more in this world.

I lay beside the dead man, adrenaline pumping through my body mercilessly and causing my heart to race a mile a minute. This, frustratingly, caused more blood to pulse out the cut across my neck and I held my hand firmly on the wound. I knew I was also injured on my foot and without medical attention I didn't stand a hope in hells chance in going anywhere. So I just lay in a slowly growing pool of my first kills blood and waited for the help to arrive.

It wasn't long until my designated ANBU operative appeared but this time without his mask.

"The snake broke your mask?" I asked the man with exhausted humour and a croaking voice.

"In a manor of speaking," Itachi said wryly as he briefly assess my blood soaked condition. I just forced a smile of reassurance.

I don't know why but I thought my first kill would be cleaner and that I'd feel less… defeated. Exhaustion? Yeah. Horror? Maybe. Hey, even accomplishment.

But not defeat.

Itachi went over and knelt next to Kabuto's dead body. He activated his sharingun and placed two fingers against its neck, held it there for a few seconds, and pulled away.

"He's dead," He confirmed and then repeated the procedure with Yoroi. "This one isn't." Itachi looked to me in question and I nodded slightly.

"A team should be on their way shortly to collect Kabuto's body and apprehend Yoroi for questioning," I said, putting more pressure on my neck to try and snub out the pain.

Silence fell between us for a moment as we both thought about exactly what _questioning _would mean.

Itachi, having assessed no danger from my fallen teammates, knelt in front of me. He quickly brushed my hands away, assessed the damage, and made the appropriate hand signals. Medical chakra enveloped his hand and he placed it lightly on my neck to seal the wound. "It's only basic but it has stopped any further bleeding." He helped me sit up and I began to access the damage to my ankle.

The evening was still young and the call of demented birds could be heard echoing throughout the forest. The river that we'd chose to camp next to was glistening with reds and gold's from the setting sun. It would have been a beautiful slight if not for the blood and bodies scattered around the area.

A unit arrived five minutes later just like I'd said they would. They didn't comment or pause in anyway. They appeared, sealed Kabuto's body and picked up Yoroi and then set off in the direction of the village. Soon the only evidence that there had been a fight at all was the pool of blood where Kabuto's head had been.

"I've been instructed to take you to the building in the centre of the forest," Itachi said gently as he approached me again. I looked up at the Uchiha before me with a vacant look and noticed that at some point he'd switched his sharingan off. "Can you walk?" I continued to stare at him with wide, emotionless eyes as I tried to process what he was asking. After a prolonged amount of time I nodded my head slightly and he approached me carefully and with slow movements.

"It will be quicker if I carry you on my back." Itachi moved the tanto sword from behind him down to his waist and then, with utmost care, pulled me to my feet. I attempted to balanced on my right foot but failed and accidently placed my left foot on the floor as well. I cried out involuntarily as pain shot up my leg and I staggered forwards into Itachi's chest.

The ANBU captain acted quickly and in one movement he grabbed me around the waist and on my upper arm and swung me onto his back so that I was riding piggyback style.

"Smooth," I said softly with genuine admiration. Itachi nodded in thank you and then began to run towards the centre of the forest.

"I haven't had a piggyback since I was a little kid," I commented to myself and gave a chuckle from my chest. I noted that the Uchiha had a small amount of blood spluttered across his uniform and a light bruise forming on his left jaw.

"Team 7?" I asked heavily.

"They're fine. But he got away," he said vaguely but it told me all I needed to know. The third exam and invasion would still take place. This time, however, things would be different. I did wonder though what Orochimaru was after? Did he still want possession of Sasuke's sharingan or was he after Naruto this time round? Originally it had been Itachi's display of genjutsu when he and Orochimaru had been brief partners within the Akatsuki that inspired Orochimaru's true desire to have the kekkei genkai in his grasp. This time there were significantly more sharingans to choose from, with the Uchiha clan still existing, so why would he specifically go after Sasuke?

I glanced at the back of the head of the ANBU operative carrying me. Maybe a vendetta against Itachi and he wanted control of Sasuke for revenge? Maybe he wanted the strongest bloodline from the main house to try and cultivate the sharingan. Or possibly he wanted Itachi's, one of the strongest sharingan users since Madara, but as he was surely not an option with his high level skill he'd go for the next best thing; his little brother.

You've got to admit it though; Orochimaru wouldn't ever accept anything other than the best.

We didn't say anything for a little while as Itachi dashed through the trees with expert skill and precision.

The quiet seemed ominous and I began to think about the bloodstains on my clothes and hands.

"What was it you gave him?" asked Itachi suddenly.

"Mushrooms – they're grown in the land of snow if you wanted to know. It turns out that the presence of excessive chakra actually does the opposite than with poison. Whereas you can burn poison out of the system, these particular hallucinogenic become stronger with the presence of chakra." I was rambling, I knew.

_My brain no work so good now._

"But you ate them too?" he asked curiously.

"They only work on some people. Although, yes, I could be considered high right now, not much is happening. I tried them before the exams and nothing happened – I had a feeling nothing would." And let me tell you those things were not as tasty as none hallucinogenic mushrooms.

"Why is that-?" Itachi cut himself off when he heard rustling to his left. He crouched in the bush and instructed me to mask my chakra. I did just that and watched as three sound genin sprinted past us with no idea we were there. As soon as they were out of sight Itachi continued to run towards to tower.

"My chakra coils. No connection to the brain," I mumbled, carrying on the conversation as if there had been no interruption.

"And they worked on Kabuto because he was using high levels of chakra to burn the poison out of his system. Clever," he muttered. Did _the_ Uchiha Itachi just sound impressed? Maybe the magic mushrooms were actually taking affect and I didn't notice. Whatever.

I just confirmed his speculation with an exhausted mutter of acknowledgement.

"You wanted me here to go against Orochimaru, not so that I could help you with the assassination." It wasn't a question.

"I'm getting whiplash from your change in conversation here." He didn't comment on my insolence and so I gave a quiet, "yes."

"How did you know?"

"Kabuto wasn't as subtle as he thought."

"So you inferred Orochimaru's presence?" His tone gave no emotion away and the slowness of my brain was failing to keep up.

"Inferred?"

"Yes, you guessed Orochimaru's presence in the forest. It was only a guess. Am I correct?" There was tightness to the Uchiha's voice that I hadn't heard before. Wait was Itachi angry?

"In a manor of speaking," I mumbled feeling embarrassed. "But I was right, wasn't I? So what does it matter?"

"I was here to make sure your mission was carried out, not to go trouncing around the a forest at your whim." _Okay, bitch slap alert._

"Well, _Uchiha_-_san, _if I hadn't _inferred _Orochimaru's presence then team 7 could very well be dead. Or worse!" my voice very high from stress and righteousness but also feebly weak to what it usually was.

"How did you know that he would go for team 7?"

_That was a good question… I'll blame it on Kabuto he's not exactly in a position to dispute any claims I make about what he did or did not say._

"Kabuto…" Yawn… "Mentioned something about the sharingan ages ago. Just dawned on me with Sasuke…" Another yawn. Man, yawning felt good. "…and Naruto would probably be a target to."

"More guessing then?" Itachi said in a flat voice, obviously not amused.

"Stop being angry right now and stop asking confusing questions," I mumbled with childishness. "Just be glad you were there to save your brother."

For a second I imagine I'd heard him say something like "but what about you?" but that was silly. The sedatives I'd put in the food pills were starting to get harder and harder to ward off and although I'd taken precautions to muffle the effects, the narcotics were more difficult to fight against than the poison. Before I knew it I had closed my eyes and was unintentionally snuggling my face into the Uchiha's hair.

"Sleep," Itachi said gently and, as if I no longer had a will of my own, that's exactly what I did.

_!_

**Hello dear readers! I cannot thank all of you enough for your reviews and feedback. It has been so positive. I'm so happy that some of you are enjoying the story so much and I hope this chapter didn't let you down! Please let me know your thoughts and theories.**

**I had to think long and hard about a way Nanami would be able to kill Kabuto that was within her ability and not just a Marysue-she-survives-and-kicks-ass. I want to say she had the element of surprise on her hand and the unpredictableness of using hallucinogenic drugs… I mean, how the hell do you fight against a bad trip?!**

**I really take a bit too much joy from writing a teenagery Nana. She's so pouty and sarcastic aww bless! And Itachi just breaks my heart bless him he doesn't enjoy being manipulated in anyway apparently.**

**On request I've also written a brief summary of some of the key point of what has happened so far incase you have forgotten! (If I've written something wrong that you pick up on let me know. I've re-read all my chapters recently as some of them I wrote over a year ago and I'm pretty certain I've got everything, but I could have missed something!)**

**Thank you against for your lovely words and until next time!**

_!_


	13. Chapter 13

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 13

!

_"__Just when you've had enough life gives you more. __And just when you think it's rained enough i__t starts to pour." - Unknown_

_"__Envy grew like a cancer; deep and invasive." – J. Lynn_

_"__The eyes are useless when the mind is blind." - Unknown_

!

I woke up to the ever-pleasant smell of disinfectant and dried blood. A pulse of pain was radiating from my foot and I moaned in discomfort. Then I panicked a little bit. You know that feeling when you've just had a bad dream and then you wake up and you don't know where you are and the dream is still lingering in the recesses of your mind and clarity of the situation is really difficult?

Yeah, that's what I felt.

I started to take deep breaths and sat up more quickly than I probably should have. The room was dull and I couldn't focus on anything and so kept blinking in an attempt to understand what the hell was going on.

"Nanami?" said a voice through a thick fog. A dark shadow started to advance on me and all I could do was stare at the approaching menace with wide, fearful eyes. My breath picked up again and-

"This is why you shouldn't eat strange mushrooms you find on the forest floor," a kindly voice said. The shadow placed two hands on my shoulder and shook me gently. The jarring movement caused my eyes to focus properly and I saw who the shadow in front of me really was.

"Mikata-sama?" I asked with a croaky voice in confusion, forcing myself to calm down and shaking my head to clear it of any residual fog. The medic handed me a glass of water and I gulped it down to quench my thirst and dry throat. I looked around the room with new eyes and found myself in a dingy cot in a concrete room that had one slit of a window on the far wall and 11 other beds scatter about that were unoccupied.

_Oh right, yeah. The chunin exams. I must be in the medical room._

"They got you doing the chunin exams then?" I asked as I slumped back onto the bed and put my hand to my forehead. _Well, that was terrifying. _I looked down at my leg, remembering the fight with Kabuto, and found it lightly bandaged but clearly healed. I opened my mouth to ask for the damage but Mikata beat me to it.

"Your Achilles tendon was severed but is now all fixed. Your ankle will be a little stiff for a few days, but it won't be immobilizing. You'll have a nasty scar across your neck but you've still got your head so I'd say that was a benefit. Apart from that there is minor bruising and some traces of poison, sedative and hallucinogenic in your blood. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?" The old medic looked at me with disapproving eyes that said he knew _exactly _what I had done and completely and utterly disagreed with my idiocy.

"I had a really good weekend," I said jokingly and received a hit over the head with the clipboard he'd been holding. "You're not meant to abuse your patients you know!" I complained rubbing my head. He gave me a dubious expression but dropped the subject.

"You'll live."

I rolled my eyes but changed the subject. "You used healing chakra on me, right?"

"Of course I did, what a stupid question. I doubt you wanted to spend months unable to walk properly," Mikata muttered with impatience. He looked at me with a shake of the head as he went back to his desk grumpily.

It explained the nightmarish wake up if Mikata, in addition to Itachi's initial healing, had forced medical chakra into my system and there were still traces of the mushrooms floating around. I chuckled to myself absently and made a mental note not to ingest that particular plant again anytime soon.

The room fell into a comfortable silence and I started to think about the past few days. When I did a sharp feeling entered my stomach and I felt the need to break the quiet.

"So why are you here? Don't you have more important things to do?" I asked again, trying to fight off the heavy thoughts as long as possible.

"You were in these exams. Your clan head volunteered me. Lovely man, Hiashi," Mikata said with deep sarcasm. I flinched at the strained smile that spread across his face and gave an apologetic shrug. He just let out a sigh and shook his head before returning to his work.

"How long have I been out?" I questioned.

"Hardly half a day. Two teams have arrived but that's it. You haven't missed anything crucial." He didn't even look up from his desk.

"Have you heard from any of the Konoha teams?"

"All but teams 8 are in the arena still."

"Have you got any food?"

"On the table besides your bed there are some food pills." I looked to my bedside table and saw he was telling the truth. The site of the pills made my stomach contract and I turned away from them quickly.

"I've suddenly lost my appetite." Mikata gave me an assessing look and threw me a banana instead which I consumed gratefully. Once I'd eaten that I started to comment on the colour of the walls and complain about the lack of light. When Ibiki entered the room an hour later Mikata sighed in relief.

"I'm not that bad!" I said with pursed lips and frowning at my medic. Mikata just hmm'd in acknowledgement and left the medical bay quickly to give Ibiki and me some privacy. My sensei moved to the edge of the bed and looked down at me with a frown. Much like before in the library we remained in silence for a few moments.

"Report," Ibiki said with no emotion and an assessing look.

"Target A was eliminated and target B was subdued," I said trying to keep any inflection out of my words. Usually I was very good at putting up a blank face; I was a Hyuuga after all. This time, however, I couldn't help the gravel in my voice at the mention of my mission. "But you know this. And I'm sure you've received a full report from Weasel as well." I closed my eyes and lent my head back against the bed in emotional exhaustion. I didn't want to play pretend right then.

Ibiki's eyes narrowed slightly. "You're very impertinent," muttered the man, but there was no real frustration in his words. He paused before continuing. "You did well." Ibiki meant what he said but that didn't help my inner turmoil at that moment.

"Is Ando-sensei around?" I asked, keeping my eyes closed. "I mean I expect he was waiting for his team-"

"He's been apprehended for questioning." The head of intelligence was sharp and to the point. I opened my eyes and sat up suddenly at his words, a look of panic slipping onto my face without my noticing.

"What? But I said in my report-"

"This is a serious security issue. We can't allow the potential for leaks." His tone was hard as stone, leaving no room for arguments.

"He's a good man," I said in a defeated manner. I brought my arm around my stomach as if trying to hold in the sick feeling that was creeping up. "A good man." I took a breath, lay back down on the bed and closed my eyes again. All my fight had left me and I just wanted to go to sleep.

"You're tired," Ibiki acknowledged. "You've done a lot for your village over the past half a year." I heard my sensei place something on the table beside my bed hesitantly. "You've been reinstated to your previous position within Torture and Interrogation. You have one month leave but I expect you back the day after the chunin exam's final." I heard the rustling of clothes as he began to walk to the door. I'm not sure if he just didn't care that I was so obviously distraught, or if he just didn't know how he could help.

I opened my eyes and rolled onto my side. I glanced for a moment at the scroll on my bedside table and then at Ibiki's retreating form.

"I don't want to play this game anymore," I muttered in a soft voice that sounded like the child I was supposed to be. I'd never been that child from the moment my memories were restored, but I wished so much to be that child if only for a little while.

I remember saying the exact thing to Hizashi once years and years ago when we would play shogi on Sunday afternoons. I'd gotten frustrated; I just kept losing the game when I was trying so hard to beat my father even just once.

"I don't want to play this game anymore," I'd pouted.

"Again," said Hizashi sternly.

"There is no point in playing this game if I don't win. Why would you play a game to lose?" I hissed as I stood up and began to walk towards to door. Of course I knew the answer; that eventually I'd get better and win and it was through losing so many times that I gained the ability to play the game well. But I was angry and my pride had been burned one too many times.

"You will sit down and continue to play the game again," my father said unsympathetically. "And we will keep playing this game until you win. Sometimes you will feel hopeless and sometimes you will feel empowered by your losses, but every time you must continue on your path."

"It's just shogi," I'd muttered, dragging my feet back to the board like an obedient child.

"But it won't always be," my father had said. I knew that he was talking about; my future as a shinobi. I thought the advice wise and so I'd tried to reign in my frustration at losing and tried once again to work hard to get better and win.

But this time it was different and the idea of walking back to the board, back to becoming a killer, was something I couldn't in good conscience swallow. Even with all my experience from my previous life I'd never been faced with violence or the prospect of my hands taking the life of another. _I don't want to play anymore._

Ibiki turned to look at me, lingering at the door. "Usually people say that when they lose, not when they win," he said.

"Who won?" I whispered.

"Who indeed." He left me alone in the concrete room and I fell asleep, if only to let my emotionally trodden mind have a small respite.

!

_Poke, poke, poke._

"Nana," someone said. "Wake up."

"Excuse me, do not poke my patients," I heard Mikata say from his desk. I cracked my eyes open slightly and saw Yoda sitting in the seat besides my bed and scowling heavily at the medic across the room.

"Jedi, go and do some actual work would you?" I muttered into the pillow with a yawn. Yoda's head whipped around instantly and a small smirk crept onto his face.

"Nana, good morning," said my partner and I smiled at him, happy for his visit. "You look terrible." My smile dropped and I turned over onto my other side.

"Go away," I breathed as I tried to go back to sleep.

"Are you sure you don't want to hear what I've been up to?" asked Yoda, probably smirking some more. "I certainly want to hear what's been happening with you." I moaned but sat up slowly and stretched my limbs. Physically, I felt significantly better than when I'd seen Ibiki the day before but mentally I could still feel the lingering fog at the back of my mind. I chose to ignore it and concentrate on the here and now.

"Mikata-sama?" I said addressing the elder medic. Mikata looked over his reading glasses with a frown. "May I leave the medical bay?" I put on my politest expression I could manage, which the medic _so_ didn't fall for.

"Nanami," he said, "you may leave but you must return so that I may give you a full medical check up. As far as I know you are fine but do not over exert yourself."

I gave Mikata a winning smile and left with Yoda to fine somewhere private and away from prying eyes and unwelcome ears. We chose the roof. We settled down together with our legs hanging over the side of the building and a comfortable silence between us.

I hadn't felt this comfortable in anyone's presence for a long while. It was nice to have someone who knew me so well and didn't judge or scorn me.

"So what happened to accelerate the plan?" I went straight to the point, as I'd wanted to ask Yoda this since receiving my assassination mission.

"I can't fully disclose some of the information," he said automatically, as it was how he started every conversation with me about any of his solo missions. "But I'll tell you as much as I can. As you are aware I went on a mission to Iwa. While I was there, after integrating myself with the culture and distinguishing key persons who would be of use to me, I discovered the goings on. Yakushi and Orochimaru made contact at some point during her initial infiltration in Iwa. From here we guess that Nonō faked her death and began to work with Orochimaru. Thus we believe that she is a close operative to the snake sannin and with links within Konoha, i.e. Kabuto. She planted spies on Orochimaru's behalf."

"And Kabuto?" I asked with deep confusion. _No, that's not right…_

"We believe he was the Yakushi mentioned during the initial interrogation, as he could move freely within Konoha, but that it is Yakushi Nonō who had been the main point of order and information." Yoda frowned as if confusing himself. He was obviously leaving a lot of information out of his retelling for security issues and was struggling to give me a cohesive story at the same time.

"So Kabuto had never been to Iwa?" I asked, probing for answers. Kabuto had been the Yakushi that made contact with Orochimaru in Iwa, not Nonō. But if Yoda didn't discover any evidence of Kabuto ever being there then that would explain the mix up with him and his mother.

"Not as far as we are aware," confirmed my partner.

"So we still believe Nonō is alive?"

"Yes, as I also received reports about a medical ninja named Yakushi who is Orochimaru's right hand. I did not discover any direct contact between Orochimaru and Kabuto, and in addition to this it would be illogical and improbable to have a genin and one so young as Kabuto the second in command to such a formidable shinobi. Yakushi Nonō must still be alive," Yoda concluded his report to me. I looked dubiously at my friend but didn't comment on the copious amounts of circumstantial evidence within his account.

There seemed to be a huge mix up with names with both of Kabuto and Nonō having the last name of Yakushi and them both being medics – no wonder everyone was confused. Also, there was obviously some manipulation from Danzo here.

ROOT covered their tracks so well that nobody, apart from those within the organization, even knew that Kabuto and Nono had been part of said brunch of ANBU. I wasn't worried, however, as it wasn't crucial and soon enough Konoha would realize that there was no Yakushi in Oto anymore and assume Nonō had died.

I suppose, in a sense, it was reassuring to know that the village wasn't truly aware that they had tasked a genin to assassinate a top class Jounin. But then again ROOT had probably been aware and had expected me to fail. And I hadn't and thus I'd probably gained their attention. _Dammit._

I looked over my shoulder in paranoia and scanned the trees around us to see if I could find any movement or evidence of an ANBU's presence. I found none but that didn't make me feel any better.

"And the chunin exam?" I asked with hesitance. When I'd asked Ibiki about it he hadn't given away any information and I suspected Yoda was under the same restrictions. Something to do with Jounin classification only - I didn't think even the chunin's were told of the invasion.

"Be on your guard," was all he said with an apologetic smile. I shrugged my shoulders, expecting the answer.

"So I guess you want to know about me?" I asked with a lightness I didn't feel. I wasn't in the mood for chatting about everything that had just gone down, but Yoda was my teammate and deserved to know.

"I've been updated by Ibiki on your situation," he reassured before I could open my mouth to explain the horrors of the past few weeks - days especially. "How are you feeling?"

I looked down at my hands and gave a breathless sigh. "I'm…" I started but drifted off. How did I feel?

I could lie to Yoda convincingly and tell him exactly what he wanted to hear, or I could tell him the home truth that it wasn't just because I'd killed someone but because I'd _killed my teammates, _that meant I wasn't feeling okay. I'd killed my teammates and I didn't feel sad about their loss and I wondered how anybody could ever trust me again.

I wouldn't trust someone who lied for months, pretending to be someone's friend, and then killed them by spiking their food.

_So no I am most definitely not okay._

But Yoda wouldn't understand because he was born to be a shinobi_. _The boy hardly had any empathy and it were practically as if he was destined to be a killer. He _couldn't_ understand and I'm not sure that I wanted anybody to.

"…Feeling okay," I muttered.

"Are you?" asked my teammate with a frown. "Because after a shinobi makes their first kill they are generally conflicted about the prospect of taking another persons life and it is not uncommon to have psychological side effects." Yoda looked at me in earnest and I couldn't help but smile at his oh-so-not-helpful words.

"Have you been reading those books on emotion again?"

"They are very clear about this point," he said, all seriousness.

"How have you survived 7 months without me?" I asked wistfully.

"It's been horrible," said the boy with a concerned frown. "Ibiki made a joke the other day, I think, and I didn't laugh."

"Very awkward," I muttered, smiling a little bit.

"Was it?" Yoda asked with another frown. We sat in silence again for a little while until I spotted my teammates eyes drift to my chin and then to my neck. I raised my hand self-consciously to hide the pink line but paused when I saw the sandy haired teens hand move of its own accord. "You've gained a scar," Yoda said as he reached out to touch it.

The movement surprised me. Yoda rarely initiated physical contact unless it was when we were sparing and being violent. I didn't pull away from his advance but I couldn't retract the shock that wormed its way onto my face. Yoda continued to look at the line across my neck, stopped his hand in mid air as if he realized what he was doing, and quickly retracted it back onto his lap and turned to face the sun.

"It suits you," he muttered, and I couldn't help but smile at the dysfunctional boys compliment and unintentional reassurances.

"Thank you Yoda," I whispered as I leaned up against him and laid my head on his shoulder. I missed his companionship so much I'd forgotten how easy his presence was.

I trusted him almost more than anyone in the world because he was my partner – and in our line of work we needed to trust our partners no matter what.

I felt something twinge in my heart as I thought these words… did I trust Yoda more than anything?

_The seal under his tongue might not allow that._

!

Yoda wished to stay with me within the forest but he was called away to assist in Yoroi's interrogation. Apparently he had woken up and was screaming bloody murder. I was very familiar with the small smile that made its way onto Yoda's face as he went to complete his job.

Yoda was concerned about me and angry that I had been hurt (even if not that significantly) and would make sure Yoroi knew exactly that.

Mikata passed me with a full bill of health that afternoon and so I found myself rather idle. Ibiki told me that as his apprentice I was allowed to remained in the training ground 44 building and help out with the rest of the exams – and when I say _allowed _I mean Ibiki told me to stay put until the official end of the second task. With the assassination I'd just completed it would be best to lay low and under the keen eye of the chunin examiners. Not wanting awkward questions and rather shy to reveal my new scar, I tired my leaf headband closer to my neck so that it was completely covering the pink line.

_So what to do… what to do…_

"Hinata!" I cried with relief as I saw my cousin sitting with her team in the main waiting room. I stood in the door with a grin as I waved to Hinata with exuberance. She looked up from her lap and smiled at me happily when she saw me there.

"Nana," she acknowledged and beckoned me towards her. She was sitting with her team in the corner as far away from the Sand team, the only others to have passed so far, as possible. As I walked further into the room I felt Gaara's eyes follow my movement and tried to ignore the burning feeling on the back of my head. I really, _really _hope he didn't have some weird vendetta against me because I was supposedly a sadist as well.

Kiba was lying on the floor with Akamaru on his chest and looked to be blissfully asleep. When I walked past him he cracked one eye opened in curiosity and when he saw it was I gave a wide grin that exposed all of his teeth and looked somewhat predatory. Shino, who was standing and leaning against the wall next to Hinata, gave me an assessing look and a subtle nod as I approached.

"So you survived the forest, aye?" Kiba asked with a whistle.

"Just about," I said with a forced smile and made myself comfortable on the other side of my cousin.

"Nana, where is your team?" she asked innocently and with polite interest.

"I made it back without them," I muttered, looking away as if in grief but really it was in shame. I heard Hinata take a sharp breath in horror and Kiba sat up in pure shock.

"What?" he said with alarm. "You mean they…?"

"There really wasn't much that I could do," I said with a deep breath and a constricted throat. "The use of lethal force is allowed after all."

Kiba looked over to the sand genin with a frown. "Yeah, we've seen that," muttered the boy, mostly to himself.

"W-w-what happened, Nana?" Hinata stuttered as she grabbed my hand forcefully to give me support. Hinata never stuttered with me. I'd been her confident for many years and her only silent support within the Hyuuga walls. Her stutter showed her unease and I felt guilty at being the one to bring it forward.

"I… Don't want to talk about it," I whispered as my eyes darkened considerably. Hinata just squeezed my hand harder and mumbled reassurances while I sat there feeling ashamed of my actions.

I got a general moment of shock when I felt another supportive hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Shino looking down at me with a frown. I just stared at him with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry," he said gently.

"So am I," I breathed.

"If you don't mind me saying," Kiba said with narrowed eyes. "You don't seem that distraught about it."

"Kiba!" Hinata chided.

"But she doesn't!" defended the Inuzuka as he hugged Akamaru to his chest. "Hey look, if you guys had died in the forest I would be beside myself with grief. And Nana… well, she's not." The suspicious look Kiba gave me made me grimace.

"Kiba, everyone deals with grief differently," reasoned Hinata gently.

"No, Kiba's right," I said with defeat and my cousin looked to me with shocked eyes. "I'm not that distraught." Hinata withdrew her hand from me as if she'd been burned.

"B-b-but…"

"They weren't nice people," I said with a sigh as I turned my head away from team 8. "They… I don't feel bad because they were horrible human beings. The world will be a better place without them."

"But they were your team mates?!" Kiba cried in horror. I didn't look up and face their most likely disgusted expressions as I stood to my feet and walked towards the door with my head down. I could have sat there and lied and faced them like _the grown woman I was _but I'd been through a lot and didn't feel the need to justify myself to anyone.

I heard Hinata call my name as I reached the door but I couldn't face the idea of going back to my cousin, the only person in my clan who didn't blindly shun me, and see a look of disappointment and fear. I left the room as quickly as possible.

Unfortunately, due to the fact I wasn't paying attention to my surroundings and my head was bowed in shame and to hide from the world, as soon as I turned the corner and was out of site of team 8 I made a sudden and painful impact with someone's chest.

I stumbled backwards cradling my nose and squeezing my eyes shut. "Mother f-"

"Don't swear," a familiar voice said. I opened my eyes and looked at my brother with shock because, for one he was here and, two, he'd just said something relatively civil. By the looks of it he was equally surprised by what he'd said and scowled at me as soon as our eyes met.

"Glad you guys made it out alive then," I acknowledged as I saw Lee and Tenten standing behind Neji.

Neji looked at me with a frown but chose to ignore my comment. He started to push past me when his eyes caught sight of something on my neck and he visibly faltered and looked slightly pale. For a second I was so thrown out by the fact that _Neji was showing emotion _that I didn't realize what he was looking at and raised my hand to my neck in reflex. When I felt the scar I quickly readjusted my headband so that it was covering my neck again, as it had come loose without me noticing when I knocked into my brother, and made sure this time that the knot at the back was extra tight. I looked to Neji with wary eyes.

"I'm fine now," I said gently. No matter how much Neji tried to deny it he still cared about me, and with all his harsh words and misguided action he wouldn't like the idea of his little sister getting hurt. I mean, a scar across the neck is a clear indication of a close call and I could only imagine the scenarios that crossed his mind at the site of the smooth line. A part of me wished I'd milked his concern, but I wasn't like that.

Neji schooled his features, pretending he hadn't seen anything, and continued to walk past me and into the waiting room. He couldn't fool me though and I saw, quite clearly, the look to relief that flittered across his features.

"It is good to see you alive as well, Nanami!" Lee exclaimed with a punch in the air. "I look forward to potentially fighting you in the next exam!"

"I won't be in the next exam Lee," I said with a tight smile. The green clad ninja gave me a puzzled look as I began to walk away from team 9 as quickly as possible.

"Why is that?" I heard my brother ask, who I hadn't realized was still lingering by the door.

I looked over my shoulder for a second and glanced at him fleetingly. "You need a team to progress to the next stage," I said clearly and without emotion, exactly mirroring Neji's tone, before continuing on my way.

"Wow, you guys really are related," I heard Tenten say before I made it to the end of the corridor. For some reason this comment made me smile a little bit.

For the following days I hid in the chunin proctor's control and staffroom.

"You can't be in here!" Kamizuki Izumo and Hagane Kotetsu shouted together when they noticed me getting the free coffee from the machine.

"Yeah I can," I muttered with sleepy eyes having only just gotten up.

"No one in the chunin exams can be in this room," Izumo said with a responsible air. "Otherwise, it will look like we are picking favorites." Izumo put a hand on my shoulder and began directing me out of the room.

"It's fine, I'm working for Ibiki again and he's a proctor and so, by extension, I can be in here. I'm also not even in the exams anymore." I ducked under the mans hand and went to continue making coffee so that I was relatively functioning.

"Ahh, caffeine, the elixir of life," I said with awe filled reverence as I went to take a sip.

"You shouldn't be drinking coffee with your hyperactive constitution," said a snobbish voice. Mikata came up behind me, out of complete nowhere, and without my notice and before I could even take a drink he had removed the mug of steaming joy out of my hand.

"Mikata!" I complained as I spun around and glared up at my medic. He just ignored me and walked out the room again with my coffee, taking a sip and giving a slight wave over his shoulder.

_Damn medics…_

"You got reinstated?" another voice asked to my side. I turned around and saw Kakashi sitting on a sofa with an Icha Icha book lazily held in his hand. He smiled at me with his eyes as I raised an inquisitive eyebrow at my friend's sensei. "Now, why is that I wonder?" suspicion laced his tone but I just gave a shrug.

"If you don't already know then I'm sure you'll find out soon enough," I said carelessly but I was slightly unsettled by his look that said 'I know something you don't know'. But then again, he permanently looked like that.

"Wait, so you actually do work for Ibiki?" a confused Kotetsu muttered and exchanged a look with his friend. "Well, I suppose we'll put you to good use then."

Kotetsu was as good as his word and I spent the remaining day or so sitting in front of a monitor with a bag of potato chips and copious amounts of coffee, watching the goings on within the arena. The two chunins were unusually good company and kept my mind off the horrible things that happened within the exams and I tried not to dwell too much on what Yoda was doing at that exact moment in time. Or whether Yoroi was still alive.

Despite this, no matter how much I laughed and smiled, I still couldn't quite push away the heavy stones that sat unforgivingly in the pit of my stomach.

!

Before I knew it the five days dedicated to completing the second task were up and I was standing on the raised platform at the back of training ground 44's indoor arena. I was along side Ibiki, Anko and a number of chunin including Izumo and Kotetsu. Gekkō Hayate, the proctor for the preliminary and final exams, stood next to the Hokage and behind him stood 6 jounin sensei.

Standing in the arena there were the 6 teams meaning 18 candidates that passed the second exam but, as was explained, this was still too much and that number needed to be at least halved if not more. While the Hokage explained the rules I surveyed the remaining teams. Team 8, team 9 and the sand team I had already seen in person but for teams 7, 10 and the sound team I hadn't yet had the chance to assess their physicality.

Shikamaru gave me a relieved nod at seeing me alive and healthy. A sharp glint in his eye told me he had heard of some of the goings on during the second task and also that as soon as I gave him five minutes he would forcefully enquire after my wellbeing. I just smiled and winked at my friend and he returned it with a lazy smirk.

Behind the Nara stood Ino but she didn't look happy at my appearance. She lent forward and whispered something in Shkiamaru's ear, which made him drop his smile and look back at me with deep concern. Inoichi must have mentioned something to Ino because I knew my emotions, at that point, were masked flawlessly. Their worried glances made me feel uncomfortable and I averted my eyes and distracted myself by looking over team 7 and the Oto teams state.

The sound team kept giving the Konoha genin dirty looks that seemed to unnerve Sakura while it appeared to empower Sasuke and Naruto.

Judging by the jagged state of Sakura's hair and the death glares being thrown their way team 7 had had a run in with the Orochimaru's minions and, by the looks of it, the Konoha genin had come out on top. It crossed my mind fleetingly in that moment how similar the original exams were compared to the current ones. My presence wasn't having any impact during this time period apart from when I actively went out of my way to change things.

I contemplated how some big things had changed (i.e. the Uchiha massacre, Hiashi's death) and other things (like the genin teams and even the teams who got to the preliminary rounds - bar Kabuto's team) had remained exactly the same. There was no guessing what would remain constant or what would be altered by my existence. It gave a feeling of great ambiguity whenever I approached anything and I had to remind myself of Shikamaru's words all those years ago; _Positive differences. _

Or maybe I could just go and live in a hole and not bother anyone.

While I'd been pointlessly musing the first opponents had been picked and the jounin sensei's and the proctors moved to their respective positions. I hurried to follow Ibiki to the back of the hall and took a seat on the floor with my legs spread out in front of me in exhaustion. My sensei looked at me with disprovable at my lack of finesse and I'm sure, if Hizashi had been there, he would have disowned me. Ibiki opened his mouth to make a comment but I cut him off before he could begin to nag.

"You owe me _big_ time," I muttered quietly.

Ibiki rolled his eyes but didn't contradict my statement. "I have a feeling you're going to hold this over my head for years to come," he said in a dejected voice.

"I also have that feeling," I confirmed, suppressing a smirk.

As if listening to our conversation the Hokage turned around and looked at me sitting on the floor with a raised eyebrow. I heard Ibiki chuckle at my deer-in-headlights look and the Hokage himself seemed to take great amusement from my position.

"I think Nanami has more than earned her rest," said the kindly old man with a wink.

"Sir," I said with a nod and a slight smile. My sensei just gave an exasperated huff.

_Cough._ "Uchiha Sasuke and Abumi Zaku," called the proctor from the centre of the room. The two opponents stepped into the fighting area and, once the proctor gave the signal, they began.

Sasuke had originally been paired with Yoroi and during that fight the young Uchiha had been marked by Orochimaru's curse seal. This time Sasuke had no restrictions on his chakra and was against a weaker opponent.

"If you guess all of the winners correctly I'll buy you lunch for a month," Ibiki muttered with a wicked grin. "If you lose you're on cell clean outs with Yoda for the whole month you get back."

"Deal," I told my sensei with a satisfied smirk. "This one's Sasuke."

"To easy," he scoffed.

"Oh I'm going to get you back for your little stint in the forest," Zaku taunted as he began to commence his high pitch sound attack.

As his biting comments at his opponent continued, getting more and more aggressive as Sasuke began to corner him, a sense of familiarity washed over me. That voice… I'd heard it before. It clicked and I frowned at Zaku with distaste. He was the ninja that met with Yoroi and Kabuto when we were in the land of rice paddies. I don't know why but he'd given off the impression of a much higher-ranking shinobi when he'd worn the mask. Well, just showed that you can't judge a book by its cover, but it did explain why ANBU wear masks. I made a note to inform Ibiki after the matches.

The match finished with Sasuke growing bored, activating his sharingan, and wiping the floor with Zaku.

"The next match will be Tenten and Temari." _Cough, cough._ "Step down to the arena," said Hayate, looking severely ill and really not wanting to be there.

"Temari," I muttered.

"You shouldn't be predicting other nations wins," Ibiki said quietly but with clear amusement.

When Temari won he shook his head with a suppressed chuckle.

"Tsuchi Kin and Nara Shikamaru," Hayate called without even walking into the centre of the arena. The Hokage gave Hayate an encouraging pat on the back when he began violently coughing again.

"Shikamaru," I said smiling slightly as my lazy friend slowly made his way down to face his opponent.

"Of course you'd say that. You're not going to bet against your friend," Ibiki reasoned.

When Shikamaru won Ibiki crossed his arms but still remained confident I wouldn't win.

"The next match will be Yamanaka Ino and Haruno Sakura," the proctor announced. Here, I paused.

"I want to say a tie," I said quietly to myself. Ibiki looked to me in surprise but I shook my head frowning. My memories were telling me that it would be an equal match but I had a feeling I'd changed something here and my years of character analysis within torture and interrogation were kicking in. "Ino," I muttered with hesitance.

Ibiki gave me a curious look but didn't comment.

The match had me on my toes. Sakura had obviously had her wake up call within the forest of death but Ino seemed much more sturdy and sure of herself. Ino and I had been friends since the early days at the academy and we'd hung out a lot when I'd been under Inoichi's tutelage. I'd helped her grow her techniques on many occasions and saved her from shoji games with Shikamaru more times then I could count.

I just had this feeling she would win.

When Sakura overpowered Ino when the blond had attempted her mind transfer jutsu my stomach twisted with nerves and I saw Ibiki smile smugly. However, the act of expelling Ino from her mind seemed to exhaust Sakura beyond her capabilities and the pink haired girl fell to the floor unconscious.

"The winner is Yamanaka Ino!" Hayate announced and I cheered along with Shikamaru and Choji at the same time that I gave Ibiki a self-righteous all knowing look.

"Yeah, yeah," he mumbled with a frown.

"Inuzuka Kiba and Uzumaki Naruto." The two ninja jumped to the arena with zealous enthusiasm and I saw Ibiki visibly flinch.

"Naruto," I said with a laugh at my sensei. The fight was exactly what I remembered from before, right down to the fart in the face, and I felt very sorry for Akamaru to be stuck in the middle of it. There was no arguing that Naruto won fair and square and in actual fact a bit more smoothly than in the original timeline.

I remembered something about a seal Orochimaru placed on Naruto during their battle in the forest and due to Itachi's interference the restriction had probably not been placed on the jinchuuriki this time around.

Ibiki put his face in his hand. "I'm going to lose," he mumbled, but I could tell he wasn't actually that upset about it. I think he felt guilty and was trying to be subtle about making it up to me. Huh, I made the torture specialist feel guilty. Apparently I was particularly talented at touching the hearts of genius', sadists, psychopaths and people who had no contact with their feelings. Yay.

"Kankuro and Aburame Shino," the proctor said with another cough.

_Oh, for the love of god, will someone get this guy a glass of water or some polo's?!_

"Kankuro?" I said with confusion. This was another match up I hadn't seen before and so I was relying on pure skill and what I knew of the two peoples abilities. "But with the bugs maybe-"

"No, you made your choice," Ibiki said with a smirk. "Lets see if you're right."

Kankuro did indeed win the match but not without severe Chakra exhaustion and a very broken puppet. I didn't have the energy to feel smug at my win if only because I was concerned about Shino as he stumbled his way back up the stairs to join his teammates. Hinata began fussing over her friend and he accepted her care with grace. That was another thing that had changed; Shino wasn't in the final exam. Apparently fate had decided Kankuro's presence in the finals was more important than the Aburame's.

"Hyuuga Neji and Hyuuga Hinata," Hayate called and my heart leapt through my chest in sudden, uncontrollable panic.

"No," I whispered without realizing and got to my feet instantly. I took a step forward, to do what I don't know, but I felt a hand descend on my shoulder stopping my movement.

"Nanami?" Ibiki questioned with a frown, obviously realizing I wasn't playing the game anymore. I looked to my sensei with wide, open eyes and I saw him hesitate as he gauged my expression. I just looked back to the arena as my shoulders slumped in dread.

"He's going to destroy her," I muttered with desolation.

How had I forgotten?! Everything that had happened and I'd forgotten this one, tiny little thing that was such a huge part in my brother and cousin's development. Don't get me wrong it's not that I'd forgotten they would fight, but it wasn't until I was staring at Hinata's wide, terrified eyes and Neji's disgusted sneer that it hit home about how brutal this match was going to be. I hadn't worried about it at all and I could mentally kick myself for my naive, stupid priorities. I'd been so worked up in trying to kill Kabuto that I'd ignored such a key part of the chunin exam.

I could have easily changed something in Neji or Hinata; two people whom I'd frequently come in contact with and who I'd actively sort to change their lives for the better. I'd said myself that something's stay the same and something's don't. If this changes at all then Neji could potentially kill Hinata, but if it didn't he's still going to squash her to a bloody mess.

But I couldn't stop the mess. Hinata had her honor and would not stand to back down from an opponent. But I knew my cousin trusted Neji enough to think she knew that he wouldn't harm her to the point of no return. She had a strong heart but her physicality did not yet match up to this strength.

I heard some of the genin, including team 7 and Lee, discussing the Hyuuga family and Naruto's puzzlement.

"From what I've heard from Nana her brother is a formidable opponent…" Shikamaru said, putting his hand on his chin in contemplation.

"Wait…Nana has a brother?" Naruto said in response to the Nara's words.

I could literally feel Shikamaru, Choji and Sasuke place their head in their hands in dismay. The conversation seemed strangely nostalgic.

"Naruto," Sasuke hissed at his teammate, interrupting whatever stupid thing he was going to say next. "I am more than certain you have met Neji on multiple occasions and Nana, several times, has introduced him as her brother."

Naruto looked at Sasuke with suspicious eyes. He then turned and looked over the railing where I was standing and scrutinized me. He then looked to Neji and then looked back at me again.

"I think I would remember that," the blond said as if talking to a child. "I mean they look so alike!"

Had I not been worried half to death over the ensuing fight I would have found the conversation relatively funny. As it was I couldn't seem to take my eyes off my brother's tense form and Hinata's shaking hands.

"Begin," the detached voice of the proctor said.

"Before we begin Hinata, I strongly suggest you withdraw from this fight…" Neji started the fight by first unnerving Hinata with harsh words about her position in life and her weaknesses as a person. The unkind honesty and exaggerated flaws caused the gentle girl to fold further and further in on herself. I wanted to shout out that no, her kindness wasn't a bad thing and that she did have inner strength, but some invisible force held me back.

From a very young age Hinata had looked up to Neji as a role model and for him to be so ruthless in front of so many people was just plain cruel. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Naruto clench the handrail of the viewing stand in unrestrained anger.

Soon Neji activated his Byakugan and continued with a rather brutal psychoanalysis of his opponent. He called her out on her visual ticks, eye movement and body language and said it was all in fear and uncertainty.

"…You'll never be anything other than weak. So give up," finished my brother.

Apparently this was the last straw for Naruto and he screamed to the high heaven that Hinata needed to do something and "shut that guy up". That he had no right to tell her what she could or could not do. I couldn't agree more.

Finding strength from Naruto's words Hinata activated her own Byakugan and the fight, or rather I should say _carnage_, began.

With Naruto's words of encouragement and screaming support Hinata continued to keep getting up every time she was knocked down, but it was doing more damage then good. I was deeply conflicted; did I want her to keep getting up or to stay down? If she stayed down she wouldn't get hurt but I understood that it was a matter of pride and honor that she keep fighting in the face of adversity.

The thing is Neji was far more aggressive than he'd ever been before in my memories. Here, there wasn't just cold detached distain but burning hatred. With the last blow Hinata was done, but when Naruto called her name one last time she found strength and got to her feet again.

And then I saw the look in Neji's eye; it was the same look I'd seen the day he'd almost struck me in the neck. Had Hizashi not been there to stop him then the consequences could have been fatal for me. Neji had grown more and more blind to the good and bad in people and only saw power and strength. If they stood in his way he knocked them down.

He'd hardly began to move but the look in his eye told me exactly what was about to happen.

I didn't think; I just moved.

No one even had time to call my name or prevent my intervention. I remembered that originally it had been Might Guy, Kakashi and Hayate who broke apart the fight; but only just. I sprinted to my brother, taking advantage of the Byakugan's blind spot that only clan members knew about and raised my hand to strike.

My fist collided with his jaw violently, without pulling back or hesitating.

It was the first time I'd ever intentionally hurt my brother.

Neji was thrown back by the force behind my blow but didn't lose his footing and remained on his feet. He was shocked; so shocked his Byakugan receded and he gently touched his jaw and looked at me with wide, furious eyes.

"Don't you touch her," I said with cool detachment and penetrating eyes but my shaking fist and deep breaths revealed my true uneasiness. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the proctor, Guy and Kakashi take steps back; it was clearly clan business.

"You dishonor her by stepping in," my brother sneered. We simply stared at each other, both equally in disgust, and a silent battle of wills began between the two of us. No one in the room dare make a sound.

There was a violent cough behind me that startled both Neji and I into action. I glanced over my shoulder and the pitiful state Hinata sat in on the floor caused more anger to rise inside me.

"Enough," I hissed and I turned back to my brother. Something in my expression caused him to falter but he quickly suppressed these feeling in favor of righteous anger. I stepped forward and lifted my chin in the proud Hyuuga way I'd been taught to follow since I was a small child. "You're taking your anger for me out on Hinata," I sneered back with as much venom as I felt. "Do you think I would let someone stand in for a fight that is rightfully mine."

"Nana-" Hinata coughed and fell to the floor, clutching her chest as a dribble of blood trickled down the side of her mouth.

"You would have kept going and it's clear the fight is over," I said to both the Hyuuga in front of me and behind me.

"Hinata!" I heard Kurenai call as she jumped down from the viewing platforms and rushed to her student. "Medics!" she called again, as the young girl collapsed in her arms. Four medical ninja rushed into the room, quickly placed Hinata on a stretcher and carried her out to receive appropriate care for her wounds. She would be fine, I'd seen on more than one occasion Hyuuga who had gotten a little too carried away during training receive worse wounds from the gentle fist than the ones Hinata had gained. Besides, she had a strong heart and would pull through from most.

But that wasn't the point.

"You want to fight?" Neji asked with a twitch in the neck.

"I'm not going to fight you," I said clearly, albeit with a touch of false bravado. The Hyuuga genius touched his jaw again as if in proof that my actions told a different tale.

"You stop the fight and yet you stand by idly," mocked Neji with narrowed eyes. "Why am I not surprised?"

"You were taking it too far; I had to step in to save our cousin," I hissed. "How can you not see that your bitterness has blinded you!?"

"You have coddled Hinata for far too long and she has grown weak." My brother's face remained cold and condemning. "But what can I expect from someone who can't even complete her missions as a shinobi?" _Ouch, low blow…_

"Do not talk of things you do not understand," I said with equal coldness as my back tensed with the judgmental eyes of the room. My heart burned to explain my actions but my mind stilled my lips as I knew the wisdom of remaining silent.

"Then explain to me why you dishonored the clan with your actions?" There was genuine curiosity behind his disdainful words.

"I don't have to explain myself to you! All you needed to do was be there and have trust I would regain my honor!" My emotionless mask slipped for a second and my voice rose and broke off, revealing my true feelings without my permission.

"Trust on what grounds?" Neji asked, remaining annoyingly calm.

"Because I'm your sister!" I shouted. What type of question was that?! We grew up together, played together, trained together and even graduated the academy together, and he asked me why he should trust me?

The pit in my stomach (you know the one I'd been ignoring and pretending didn't exist) began to grow and I tried to push the feeling away but failed miserably. I could feel my face cracking but the more I fought with Neji the less I cared which one of my inner demons came to the surface for the entire world to see.

"That means nothing. You ask me for blind trust," Neji said, words dripping in resentment. "Why not? It's all anyone has ever asked of me."

"And that's not true!" My voice broke again and I noticed I was crying. I hadn't meant to but I was. "You are my older brother and I trusted you with the world. And I know that you trusted me too!" I shouted at him and raised my arm and pointed it in his face. "We are family and that means we love each other; through thick and thin. That we help each other when we need it and _trust _each other when they ask it of us." I took a step forward to emphasize my point but Neji stepped back, his face confused and angry at my words. "And Hinata is family. You do not do that to people you love!"

"We are Hyuuga," Neji spat. "Our family is not about love; it's about sacrifice and oppression. But what would you know about sacrifice for your family? You and Hinata were born lucky and with this you have grown undisciplined and she has grown weak. The main house uses us and we in the branch family are their _slaves._ You have escaped this fate, so how could you even understand?"

"Oh Neji no…" I whispered, the anger having left me like a gust of wind and in its place I felt desolate exhaustion. "Family means so much more than that. I'm so sorry that you've lost that." More tears spilled down my face but my posture remained strong and ready.

"Me? What would you know about family? It doesn't mean anything to you anymore," Neji hissed and I felt lost for words. "Honor means nothing to you and you certainly have no love for your clan. Why don't you stop pretending?"

He was talking about what he'd over heard between Hizashi and me and about my failure working in T&I. Deep down he was also talking about my lack of a curse seal. Only because I knew him so well could I hear the subtle inflection of jealousy in his voice and the accusation that I wasn't sharing in his pain. He didn't mean it, I know he didn't, and he didn't truly understand but… damn, that hurt. And it only hurt because I loved my brother so much and wanted to help him more than anything… but I couldn't.

"You know nothing," I whispered because I simply didn't know what else to say. I caught sob of emotion in my throat as I looked to my older brother, feeling deeply betrayed. I hadn't felt this horrible at any point in my life before and I didn't know what to do. What hurt even more is that he was _right _to think all these things and I couldn't tell him what he needed to hear due to the secrecy of the village, the seal on the back of my neck and that if I told him I knew the future he'd think I was crazy and wouldn't believe me anyway. I couldn't tell him that he was _wrong_.

I did everything to protect the family and the people I loved. I'd killed my teammate in cold blood because I want to protect _them_. I'd allowed my friends to believe me a monster because I wanted to protect _them_. I'd gone near mad with the lies I kept telling all because I wanted to protect _them_. Because they were the people I _loved_.

I just wanted to protect them all… I just want to…

I turned on my heel and ran out of the room as fast as I could; tears were streaming down my face and my stomach hurt so much I thought I was going to be sick.

"Nana!" I heard Shikamaru yell but I ignored his voice, I ignored the leaf ninja at the exit of the tower and I ignored the pounding pain that coursed through my head.

I just wanted to run away from it all.

And so I ran.

I ran.

I ran and ran and ran and oh god I just wanted to keep running. No one was chasing me – not today. I needed to find somewhere to hide for a little while, where no one would suspect or come looking for me. At least for a little while.

It was raining again if you were interested.

I jumped and tripped through the trees of training ground 44 without pausing and made it out into the open air in an immeasurable about of time; it could have been 10 minutes or an hour, all I could really remember were the trees and the tears. I raced through the streets of Konoha without slowing and even seeing more than ten other people. The evening was creeping in and the streetlights were at the in between flickering stage where they didn't quite know if it was dark enough to turn on yet. The pitter-patter on the tin roves drowned out the sound of my stamping feet but I didn't even notice; simply obsessed with getting to my destination without falling apart again.

I knocked on the door to the last person who probably wanted to see me at that point. Ibiki had said they'd taken him in for questioning but it wouldn't have taken longer than a few hours for them to realize his innocence. He was probably home.

He had to be home.

When Ando opened to door to his apartment he looked like shit – that's what a night in torture and interrogation could do to you.

"Ando-sensei?" I whispered. "I'm so very, very sorry." I closed my eyes shut as hard as I could and attempted to pretend that I wasn't actually crying and it was just the rainwater running over my face.

"Nana, why are you…?" Ando-sensei's voice broke at the end with emotion but I knew he couldn't quite keep the inflection of worry out of his voice. That was his job after all; to worry about his students. But he'd lost his students and that was all my fault _as well. _

"I wish I didn't… I had to but… and now I don't know what to… and my brother just…and I don't know what to do!" I let out an uncontrollable sob as my nails dug into my fists and my hands shook with anguish and exhaustion. "I'm so sorry…" I breathed between deep breaths, over and over and over again. I don't think I even noticed when Ando picked me up and cradled me to his chest like a small child.

"Hush now," he said gently, as if he we're speaking to a toddler. "I know you're sorry. I am too."

I sobbed into my Jounin sensei's jacket like the little girl I really was. I didn't want to play this game anymore; I didn't want to be this person who kept secrets and held together the balance of the world. I didn't want to know any of it. I just wanted to protect the people I loved and I couldn't even do that; I couldn't even protect Neji from himself.

I don't know when Ando took me inside and I didn't register falling asleep to his softly spoken reassurances. I just wanted to forget all the lies for a little while.

I'd been pretending to be someone else for so long, first a child and then a spy, I almost couldn't remember what it was like to be me anymore.

Lies were so easy.

But when it rains it fucking pours.

!

**So when I'd first started writing this fanfiction the preliminaries was THE SCENE I wanted to have in here. I mean I always got so very angry with Neji and his stuck up attitude when he was fighting against Hinata and he didn't seem to have any care that he'd really hurt somebody he should have loved. So I wanted Nana SO BADLY to tell him exactly how stupid he was being. But BAM he turns it on her and… THE FEELS GUYS! Did not expect that amount of Angst in this story. I feel like I should maybe change the whole category of this story to Angst all things considering.**

**On a quick side note, some of you seem to not like Nanami's character very much and feel she's a bit of a pushover (and I have a feeling this chapter hasn't helped her case). Well, she kind of is but she ****_is_**** related to Hinata who is THE MOST kind person in the universe so you'd expect a little bit of push-over, naïve-ness as a result. All in all Nana has a hell of a lot of love and this is her one true drive with all she does. As a result she gets a little bit tunnel vision, doesn't realize she's being manipulated and ends up in frustrating situations. But hopefully she has enough badass, mischievousness and intelligence in her tiny little head that you'll forgive her for her shortcomings. But don't forget she's only been in the Naruto world for 12 years and so she is still developing as a person and a ninja. Also, there are some aspects of humour in this story so please treat the silly little moments as such – seriousness all the time gets a little boring.**

**Please let me know what you think and how much you hate Neji! Thank you to everyone that pointed out the spelling errors in the story so far and all those that were pointed out to me should have been fixed. Your comments are so much fun! You all have so many theories concerning who Nanami is going to marry and about her seal and her general failings at life. Some are right, others are way off… and some have even got me thinking… hmmm.**

**So, stay tuned and until next time!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Stamping on Butterflies**

Chapter 14

!

_"__The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life."_ - Richard Bach

_"__Prisons are the temples where devils learn to prey. __Every time we turn the key we twist the knife of fate, __because every time we cage a man we close him in with hate." _― Gregory David Roberts, Shantaram

!

My eyes fluttered open to the sound of the doorbell.

I lazily looked at the clock besides the bed and was mildly surprised to see it was early evening – I'd slept away the last 24 hours. Apart from for basic human needs I hadn't moved from my fetal position for the entirety of the day. Ando had reassured me I could stay with him as long as I needed to and without his support who knew where I'd be stumbling and sleeping. The previous day when I'd fallen asleep in his arms he'd put me in his bed and taken the sofa without complaint.

Had I psychoanalyzed him I would have come to the conclusion he simply wanted to feel needed in a time where he'd failed those he was meant to protect. But really, I was in too much of a messed up state to even start to consider the mental health of somebody else.

My attention drifted to the ceiling when I heard a familiar voice at the door. It was a comforting voice, but not someone I wanted to see right then – I was too vulnerable.

"Is she here?" asked Inoichi with obvious worry.

"Yeah, she's in the bedroom," Ando said quietly, as if attempting not to disturb me. Inoichi let out a relieved sigh.

"Thank Kami. We've been out most of the day looking for her. When she didn't come back this morning we'd thought…" Inoichi drifted off at the end of the sentence and let the unspoken words ring in the air.

_Run away? Been assassinated? Jumped off a bridge? Please, give me more credit._

"I guess that's why she picked my place; you wouldn't think to look here." Ando sounded very tired.

"Do you think I could…?" the Yamanaka clan head asked, lowering his voice.

"I don't think she wants to…" began Ando-sensei, probably waving his arms around in the fluttering worrying way that was so very individual to him. Already I'd noticed his movements weren't as bouncy or sincere as they had been before. They were bland and lifeless now, like he didn't have any energy left; or he just didn't care.

"No, I don't imagine she does," Inoichi said with another sigh, somehow heavier and more world weary than before. "Just let her know… well, just tell her I was here."

No one came to look for me after that. Inoichi probably reassured anyone else out looking that I was safe but needed some time and space.

When my old sensei left I grabbed the covers and pulled them over my head, squeezing my eyes shut tightly. I didn't start crying again but I wasn't ready to face the world just yet.

I decided to go back to sleep.

!

"We should probably talk about what happened," I muttered as I looked down at my tea. Unlike the previous day, Ando-sensei had forced me to get out of bed that morning. He sat me down in the living room delicately, as if I were to break in his hands were he to move too quickly, and grimly handed me a mug of tea. He took a seat opposite and an awkward silence filled the air as we both tried not to bring up the elephant in the room.

After three minutes at staring into my beverage I'd cracked.

"No," Ando said firmly, "we don't."

I felt tears well up in my eyes. _Dammit I hadn't cried all of yesterday. Keep it together!_

Realizing his mistake instantly he backtracked. "No," Ando said more gently and with pure exhaustion. "They asked an awful lot of you, you know? I'm ashamed I didn't notice that my… my students were…" He drifted off with a deep breath and I looked up as I felt pity grow in my chest. "Team 13 is gone and if what they told me is true, that they were spies for Oto… then I can't fault you for your actions." My sensei looked me right in the eye as he said these words and I knew he meant every one.

My reply got caught in a well of emotion in my throat and so I just nodded dumbly and we sat again in silence; this time it was more comfortable as we both digested the confession. Finally, I felt ready to speak.

"For what its worth you were a very good sensei," I said quietly but with equal truth. "You were a fantastic sensei, actually. Because you cared." If he hadn't of been a good sensei I wouldn't have run to him like I did in my time of need, and he wouldn't have taken me in with open arms and heartfelt care. I smiled at him slightly and he returned the gesture hesitantly.

"From what I see Nana, you have a lot of people who care about you," he said softly but with a meaningful look.

He was right; I did. But the idea of facing the world just hurt too much. I didn't want to see the disappointment and betrayal I'd seen in Neji's eyes or the hurt in Hinata's or even the worry in Shikamaru's. But I knew I'd have to eventually. "They're very worried about you, you know?" I swallowed and looked away but I knew his words to be true.

_I am a liar and a murderer and a spy, but, sir, I am no coward. _

"Yeah, I know…" I muttered and gave a sigh. "It was nice to have a little time away to cope. But I don't like leaving things hanging. I believe…" I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as I allowed a new type of resolve to take root in my chest.

I'd been hurt and I'd been traumatized during the exams. I'd had my cry and my time away from the world but it was time to take action and fix the mess that had gathered at my feet. "I need to sort some things out," I told Ando and the soft smile that graced his lips told me I'd come to the right conclusion.

!

"Thank you Ando-sensei," I said as I stood at the door a few hours later after a shower and a bite to eat, feeling significantly more confident in my decisions. It's funny how a full stomach and a bit of cleanliness can make you feel like you can take on the world.

"If you ever need anything. I mean, I know I'm not your sensei anymore but-" Before he could finish his sentence I cut him off with a heartfelt hug. He was shocked at first by the contact (I'd ever really hugged the guy before) but readily returned it with a chuckle.

"Thank you," I repeated as I pulled back, smiled the most brilliant smile I could give and was gone with the wind before he could reply. The sound of his worried shouts behind me just made me grin even more.

I got to the main Nara's house in no time - it was my obvious first point of call.

I'd been wearing the same clothes for a few days at that point and they stunk a little bit, so it was probably best to change before I attempted to do anything productive. Not only that but there was a little somebody I probably needed to see as soon as possible, lest he gain an ulcer from the stress.

I stepped up to the entrance and let myself in without hesitating or even thinking about the action. It was so natural as I'd been living there for most of the year I didn't even think twice. I stepped through and I could see the door leading into the kitchen was open and familiar voices drifted down the hall.

Before I could decide if I should get changed before I went to greet the household I heard the conversation in the kitchen abruptly stop. I heard footsteps approaching fast and within seconds came face to face with Shikamaru as he paused in the doorframe to the kitchen. He looked surprised and so blatantly relieved to see me it made me feel slightly uncomfortable - Shikamaru was usually the embodiment of subtlety.

I lifted my hand to my head and ruffled my hair in a gesture of guilt. Damn, I'd really worried the guy. "Hey-" I began but was cut off as my best friend quickly approached me and enveloped me in a hug.

_He's hugging me optionally? I really, really worried him._

I returned the hug without complaint and, really, it felt nice to know that at least one person trusted me no matter what and wanted me to come home. We stayed like that for longer than was socially deemed acceptable.

_I'd really, really, really worried him._

When he pulled back he looked like his father used to when he was scolding us when we were kids for making a mess or being too loud. But he didn't say anything; he just looked at me with deeply scrutinizing eyes.

"Are you going to say something or just stare at me?" I asked feeling very vulnerable and not liking it. "Take it from me when I say asking questions usually gets you further in life." I was trying to make a joke and this just caused Shikamaru's face to look even sharper at me.

"Go and get changed," Shikamaru instructed and the pure concern in his voice caused me to nod and do exactly what I was told. As I walked past my friend I saw Shikaku standing by the door and smirking at us as if we were a circus display. When I made eye contact with him his smile faded a little bit and the look of worry in his eyes mirrored his sons exactly.

I found some fresh clothes and brushed my teeth and hair and headed to the kitchen as quickly as possible so I could get the scolding and worried fretting out of the way. I made a mental note to appreciate it because there wouldn't be anything like this when I went to the Hyuuga compound.

I walked into the kitchen and found no sign of Shikaku, however Shikamaru standing by the back door with a mug of steaming tea in his hand. I spotted another one on the counter by the wall and went to grab it and take a sip.

It was Jasmine, my favorite, something Shikamaru knew very well.

"I'm sorry I worried you," I muttered as I went to stand next to my friend.

"Yeah, you should be," Shikamaru replied in a deep, serious voice.

A tense silence rang between us for a short amount of time as I tried to think up other ways to reassure the lazy Nara. He seemed uptight and on edge, whereas he was usually relaxed and laidback, and this spoke more of his true feelings then anything he might say. Guilt spilled into my stomach at the thought that I'd caused this.

"Look Shikamaru-"

"What Neji said-"

We both started to talk at the same time but stopped when we realized the other was speaking. I gestured for Shikamaru to continue, as all my words were was another apology.

"What Neji said in the exams isn't true," he said looking down at his mug held in both hands. The whites of his knuckles were showing which gave away the tight grip he held on the porcelain. He suddenly looked up at me and the emotion in his eyes surprised me a little bit and I swallowed involuntarily. "You love more than anyone I know. You try and give so much for so many; your clan, me and Choji, your work and even Naruto when he was younger when nobody else would talk to him. No one sees it because you're so subtle in your work and humble with your accomplishments. Please don't let his words affect you again."

I felt moisture gather in the corner of my eyes and I smiled up at my friend gratefully. I reached out and punched Shikamaru's arm in affection, both to instill a sense of normality and humour to the situation, but also so that the unusual display of emotions didn't get awkward. As quickly as it had appeared Shikamaru's open faced closed off and was replaced by annoyance but also amusement.

"Woman!" hissed the Nara heir as he relaxed his hold on the mug and moved his right hand to cradle his left arm.

"You're a true friend Shikamaru," I said as I winked and grinned. "Do you know what, I think we should have another hug!" I turned for a split second to put my mug on the counter but when I turned back the lazy teen was gone. _Again, when he's motivated he can really move!_

As soon as I was alone my manic grin slipped into a gentle smile and my heart warmed a little bit. It was nice to feel something positive instead of the usual nervous clenches that had taken hold of my life over the past months.

I laughed to myself quietly as I picked up my beverage again and walked further out onto the porch. I found Shikaku leaning against the wall a few metres up; obviously within hearing distance of mine and Shikamaru's conversation. I walked over, stood besides him and looked up at the guy with a raised eyebrow, but he just shrugged unrepentantly.

"What are you going to do now?" he asked looking out into the garden and forest behind the house.

"I'm going to go see Inoichi I think," I said with a shrug.

The smile on Shikaku's face told me he agreed with my decision and that I was making the right choice. We stood like that for a few moments; both of us lost in thought, before I gave a light cough and looked to the Nara clan head shyly.

"Shikaku, I was wondering," I began and the annoying man seemed amused by my discomfort. "I know that things are going to start changing with the Hyuuga clan after the chunin exams but…" I drifted off and looked to the sky in thought, struggling to find the right words.

"You've always got a place here if you need it. You're practically family after all," the Nara clan head said as he place a hand on my shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. I felt deeply touched at his words as I hadn't quite realized how much he cared for me. But I shouldn't have been surprised. In his eyes he'd seen me grow alongside his son and I'd called on the Nara household more than once in my time of need. And that's what family was after all, I'd said it myself in the arena;_ help each other when they need it and trust each other when they ask it of us._

His eyes looked dark as he studied me with a furrowed brow and a concerned smile. "I heard what happened during the exams and I'm glad you're alright." I broke eye contact and looked back up at the sky again.

"Me to," I whispered mostly to myself.

!

Later that day I walked into the Yamanaka flower shop and saw Ino sitting behind the counter and, as always, reading a magazine. When she heard the bell on the shop door go she looked up in interest and her face instantly lit up with surprise and happiness and… something else.

"DAD!" screamed the girl immediately as if the world was going to end and he needed to come quickly. I heard a _thud_ and a panicked voice swearing aggressively in reply.

"Whagt!? Whagt's 'appened?!" I heard the muffled shout of Inoichi stumbling down the stairs and within seconds he had burst through the door half dressed with a toothbrush in his mouth and a shirt clutched in his hand. He first looked to his daughter with wide, worried eyes but when his gaze fell on my shocked form his shoulders dropped in relief.

"Io! I fough' it 'aw an emergency!" said Inoichi to his daughter in anger, toothbrush still in his mouth.

"Hey, you said for me to tell you the second Nana stepped through the door," Ino said brushing off his concern and returning to her reading. "Should have been more specific."

Inoichi gave Ino a disapproving look but decided he was more interested in me then the difficulties of his daughter. He took the toothbrush out of his mouth; his eyes alight with curiosity and concern, and opened his mouth to say something. However, before he could voice his thoughts, I interrupted him.

"Please put on some clothes," I said with distaste as I averted my eyes from his exposed chest, feeling uncomfortable. Hey, I was born a Hyuuga after all and you wouldn't tend to see anyone of my family walking around with anything more than an ankle out! I mean, Hinata didn't wear that ridiculously large coat for nothing.

For once more interested in my wellbeing than antagonizing me he pulled the shirt over his head quickly. He then smiled at me mischievously. "You used to have a crush on me, do you remember?" asked the man with a glint in his eye.

"Thank god that ship has sailed," I muttered under my breath as I rolled my eyes and suddenly found the ceiling a very interesting shade of light green. I heard a deep chuckle emit from my ex-sensei's chest and looked up to see a sad smile on his face and his hands hidden in his pockets.

"You know you worried me," Inoichi said softly, suddenly all serious. "I wasn't sure if you could do it. You've always been rather gentle in spirit you know, reluctant to hurt any body. And when Shikamaru came here after the exams all panicked and looking everywhere for you I thought that maybe something terrible had happened…" His eyes creased up as if he was smiling but really it was more of a grimace.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ino glance my way with the same look as her father. I just smiled at them both and looked down at the floor, unsure of what to say. Inoichi waited though, knowing I'd come here for a reason but he wouldn't push. I needed to ask for his help myself.

"Inoichi-sensei," I began with a breath and looked up to my old teacher with resolve. "I would like to talk to someone about what happened… if you happen to have a spare ear to listen, that is."

He looked... proud somehow.

"Of course," he said gently.

That evening, when I left the Yamanaka household, Inoichi pulled me into a bone crushing hug right before I could leave. I didn't begrudge him the exuberant affection. In all honesty I felt light; lighter than I had in months in fact. I'd talked about what had happened while I was on the team (Inoichi being completely in the know and so I hadn't disclosed any sensitive information) and all my conflicted feeling over the past month in regards to the mission.

It was nice to tell the truth for once and unburden myself with all my problems to someone I trusted and cared for. My troubles weren't gone, not by any means considering I had more life changing secrets then I had years in this world and the pressure of them would probably never completely go away, but even just a little bit of lifted weight made it that much easier to stand with my head held high.

I hugged him back; trying to get across my pure appreciation for his support and guidance, and as the warm feeling in my chest began to grow again I realized in that moment how much family I truly had within Konoha.

!

"Nana!" Hinata said with a genuine smile. I walked into the hospital room with the flowers Ino had given me the previous day at the shop and a shy smile escaping onto my lips.

"Heya," I mumbled, not knowing how I should address my cousin. If I were her I'd be very angry with me for stepping in, but really I should have known Hinata's brain didn't work like that. When I'd tried to apologize and explain my actions she just shook her head slowly.

"I'm a failure," she said solemnly and with a sad smile.

"What? No! Of course you're not," I reassured, meaning every word and grabbing Hinata's hand in support like she had done with me. "The strength of character you showed within that ring outweighs any shame you might feel in losing the match."

"But I was so clearly weak and helpless…" said the girl in a dejected voice and I looked down at our interlocked hands with a sad smile.

"You know I kept thinking 'I hope she stays down'," I told her in a soft voice. She removed her hand from mine and looked deeply hurt by my words. But I continued. "Every time he hit you I saw your pain and I wanted it to _stop. _And if that meant you stayed down, despite honour and pride and a stupid exam, then so be it."

Hinata sighed. "You're a very strange Hyuuga," she said gently but with great understanding. "But I know you mean well."

"I'm sorry for stepping in but your life is more important than any feeling of resentment or hurt pride," I told her with truth.

"Maybe one day I'll be strong enough for nobody to have to step in," said the young girl. I looked to my cousin and all I saw was a little 12-year-old girl with confidence issues. And yet, her eyes showed a deep determination to follow her goals and respect for the girl-child fluttered in my chest.

I picked up one of the little orange flowers in the bouquet Ino had prepared, leaned forward and slipped the bud into Hinata's hair with a soft smile. "The flower the blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all…" _God… did I just quote Disney?! _"That's you Hinata. The more the world throws at you the stronger you get and the harder you fight back. I admire that greatly because I've been struggling every day to fight back – but you inspire me." Hinata's eyes shined with gratitude at my words and her smile could have lit a stadium it was so bright.

"Thank you… but Nana, you have so much strength and you always fight for what is right. You have a big heart," she said with kindness.

"If you admire that in me," I said touching the center of my chest. "Then you need to take a look in the mirror and see that the love in your heart is greater and stronger than anyone I know." I reached out and touched the centre of Hinata's chest gently.

We talked about more generic things after a while. I realized I didn't know who'd passed the preliminaries in the end and who was fighting whom during the 3rd round. Hinata, luckily, had been updated by her teammates and informed me of the goings on. It was a bit of a girly gossiping session but it was nice to casually chat with someone.

Apparently when I'd left Naruto had jumped down to confront Neji (predictable). However, apparently he'd not only claimed to fight for Hinata sake but he'd also announced that he would make Neji pay for making me cry. He said that he'd only ever seen me cry once in my life and he wasn't happy about seeing it again. I didn't think it could but my heart swelled a tiny bit more.

The fights had continued with Lee Vs Gaara and Choji Vs Dosu. Gaara and Dosu had advanced to the next round but, from what Hinata had heard, the fight between Lee and the sand genin had been very brutal and no one knew if Lee would walk again.

I knew she wanted to but she didn't mention the teammates of mine who had been killed within the arena. I think she thought I was in denial about the whole thing and the emotional outburst was just proof of the suppressed feelings. I let her think what she wanted; the going on within the second exam wouldn't be common knowledge until after the chunin exams at least.

The fighting pairs for the second round were, unsurprisingly, very similar to the first time around, and were as follows: Neji against Naruto, Temari against Shikamaru, Kankuro against Ino, Sasuke against Gaara and Dosu would play winner – that was, if he didn't die by Gaara's hands before then.

I left her after a few hours and idly made my way through the hospital to the check up with Mikata - a follow up of my injuries in the exams.

I stopped on my way, however, when I caught sight of an unconscious Rock Lee lying in a hospital bed within a private room. I peaked through the door and saw the kid sleeping peacefully but judging by the copious bandages covering his legs he was obviously very badly injured. I pulled the flower out of my hair, one Hinata had put in absentmindedly as we were talking, walked quietly into the room and put it on the table besides the boy. I glanced at the clock on the wall and realized I was running late for my appointment and so made a promise to return to give the suffering ninja some company. As I turned to leave I hesitated for a second as I felt a menacing presence approach the door.

The first sign of what was to come were the sand particles that danced across the floor and into the room, forming swirling patterns and delicate flowers. Following behind them was a red haired boy with a sinister charisma and bags under his eyes so hollow they were almost black. When he saw me in the room he stopped at the door and narrowed his eyes, releasing waves of malevolent chakra.

"Hello," I said with an impressively even voice.

"You're the Hyuuga girl," said the boy, rather rudely.

"And you're the Kazakage's kid," I said with a smile. "Nice to meet you too."

The boy sneered at my words. "It's never nice to meet me," he said.

"It's never nice to meet a lot of people," I said with an unsure smile as I shrugged my shoulders. In actual fact I felt like hitting my head against a brick wall repetitively. "Are you alright?" _Why are you talking with a deranged psychopath?! And why are you making jokes with someone that probably has a sense of humor worse than Yoda?_

We stood in awkward silence and stared at each other for a little while. His unblinking expression was unnerving but I'd always been able to hold even the most forceful stares. Gaara broke eye contact and looked behind me for a moment. He seemed to be weighing something up in his mind but when he looked back at me he'd obviously come to a definite decision about whatever it was.

"You said something in the exam. Tell me what you meant," demanded the red head with all the air of someone who usually got anything he asked for; through fear or because of whom his father was, who knew?

"You're going to have to be more specific," I said without any mocking in my voice. "I'm guessing you mean the fight with Neji and… about family and love?"

Gaara's eyes widened a minuscule amount at my guess and I gave a grave smile. I ushered us out of Lee's room politely, gesturing for him to lead the way, and we stood in the hallway facing each other critically.

"It always is," I said somberly as I leaned against the wall and looked to the suna-nin with half lidded eyes. It was a technique I'd learnt from Shikamaru about how to seem like you were bored and didn't really care much about the conversation and thus, hopefully, perceived less of a threat. "So, what is it you wanted to know?"

"You said that love is what family is for," Gaara said in his deep, husky voice. "But your brother didn't agree. Why?" Gaara obviously didn't realize that it was both a very private and sensitive matter to discuss family relationships with strangers. I didn't mind so much as I knew the boy wasn't looking for gossip but internal answers.

I felt sorry for the guy; he was 12 and was having a continuous existential crisis.

"Neji has had a lot of negative things happen in his life," I told Gaara gently.

"And that makes him unable to love?" pushed Gaara, trying to make sense of what I was telling him.

"Pain doesn't make you unable to love, it just makes it more difficult. People who have been hurt just have to work that extra bit harder to let people in." I didn't think I could quite explain this to the sociopathic child, considering he didn't even truly understand the concept of love, but I was trying my best.

Gaara just stared at me. "And you've been… ostracized? From your family." I think he was trying to reach out to me in understanding, having seen something of himself in my own supposed back-story.

"You seem to have heard the rumors," I said smiling ironically.

"No one likes you."

_Burn._

"A few people still like me," I told the red haired boy with a sarcastic smile. His blunt opinions reminded me of a very small child that hadn't yet been taught to be polite and just asked what came to his head without thinking of how the other person might perceive it.

"But you have been shamed. Why would anyone like you?" he persisted.

"You've got to find the right people, I suppose."

"The right people?" He looked so confused the poor dear.

"Friends. People that like you for you," I explained carefully.

"How do you find those people if no one will speak to you," he asked, deadly serious and looking to me as if I had all the answers.

"Someone's always willing to speak to you." _Unless you've done something really horrible and everyone hates you… _

"Not when you're like me." He didn't say it in a self-pitying way but as if it was a known fact.

"I'm speaking to you," I told the boy carefully. He just looked back at me with more intensity.

"What about your family? Your brother." Gaara seemed more and more willing to talk to me the more I explained myself.

"Family is different. They'll be there no matter what, whether you want them to or not. Whether they want to or not. From what I gather you don't like your siblings very much, but they're still standing next to you."

"That doesn't mean love," hissed the boy, suddenly growing angry and I remained very still.

"No, but it's a start. And it's more than I've got with my brother right now," I said with deep honesty that Gaara seemed to pick up on.

"So you're saying you need other people to validate your existence," the red head nodded to himself, as if I'd confirmed something for him. I saw the grains of sand at his feet begin to roll around faster and faster in swirling patterns.

"You don't need validation for your existence; you just are. But people are nice to have around," I reasoned, not reacting to the sand in the slightest and continuing to make eye contact with Gaara.

"Nice to have around…" echoed the jinchuriki and he frowned again, as if confused. Gaara looked like he'd gotten the answers, or found the right questions he came for, and so nodded to himself again and then just walked away. No need for me to defend Rock Lee from death by sand suffocation and no need to fend off killer sand trying to crush my bones. Without a fight or even a fit of violence, it was… unexpected.

"Nice to meet you too," I muttered letting out a nervous laugh.

_I wonder if he can turn off the killing intent ever, because that was intense beyond words._

I found myself suddenly standing alone and I had to shake myself visibly to dislodge the unsettling feeling that had crept up my spine.

"Well…" I said incredulously to myself before I headed down the corridor and on my merry way. I wasn't sure that the conversation would change anything at this point for Gaara, but I certainly gave him food for thought.

Mikata gave me a disapproving look when I walked in late. He began the medical examination swiftly and none to carefully. Soon he'd signed me off with no lasting affects from the poison and a fully functioning foot.

"I would have liked to have done something about this scar," muttered the medic with a clinical eye as he examined my neck. "It was healed very crudely."

"The field first aid application probably saved her life. Her life is more important than a scar," said a voice at the door.

"Oh, you do care," I said in a monotonous voice as I looked at my father over my shoulder sarcastically. Mikata looked at Hizashi with a frown and a sigh.

"You know only immediate family within the room during an examination," the medic muttered as he began to pack up his stuff. "Lucky for you I've finished."

"Don't leave on Hyuuga-sama's account," I told Mikata, suppressing a smile. "You were here first."

The medic looked at me with amusement as he closed his bag and grabbed all his things.

"Thank you for the thought Nanami, but you are funnily enough not my only patient," said the man, though he looked tempted to take me up on my offer if only to antagonize my father. "I'll be off. Good day."

Mikata left and the door slammed behind him on the way out. There was an awkward silence in the room as I jumped off the examination bench and turned to my only parent.

"You shouldn't frown you'll get worry lines," I said mockingly.

"You get more and more insolent every year," Hizashi grumbled.

"I'm guessing you were here to see Hinata," I observed and narrowed my eyes in suspicion. "That's… unexpected." Hizashi avoided eye contact with me as he stood just inside the room. "You came to see me didn't you?" I asked sighing.

"Both," said my father coldly. "Mikata informed me of your injuries."

"Traitor," I muttered with a pout as I cross my arms.

"Are you…" he coughed uncomfortably and I looked up, finding his awkwardness funny. "…well?"

"Mentally or physically?" I asked rhetorically.

"Both," he repeated.

"A man of many words as always." I strolled around the edge of the room and brushed my hand across various instruments.

"You're avoiding the question," Hizashi said with impatience, still standing stoically by the door. There was another pause, this time it was longer and left me time to think on what I really wanted to say to my father.

"Neji is so lost," I whisper as I stopped in front of the model skeleton in the corner. "You need to help him otherwise he will lose himself beyond recognition."

"You blame me," Hizashi said. It wasn't a question.

"It's natural to want to blame your parents for everything bad that happens in your life," I said, still staring in to the cold, dead eyes of the teaching skeleton and still not giving an answer to his original question. I sighed and slumped my shoulders. "But there is no denying that you are partly to blame." I glanced to the side over my shoulder. "But I'm not judging you."

"The fight between the two of you has been coming for a while," Hizashi observed. "Maybe now things will progress."

"Yes. Maybe after the exams things will become clearer to him," I said with an all-knowing smile nobody could see. A heavy silence filled the room and tired of the little game I caved in and gave my father a straight answer. "I'm fine now. But I'm not the one you need to worry about," I said gently as I turned to address my father with a tight smile.

He just looked at me with mostly blankness, but concern slipped onto his features subtly. "And yet you are the one I worry about most," he said.

I just stared at him with wide eyes; surprised at his confession and feeling I should say something witty in return. Before I could think, however, Hizashi had left the room and there was just a creepy skeleton present to witness my utter confusion.

"Family," I said to myself in exasperation, and I left the hospital quickly lest I run into someone else troublesome.

!

"So…" began Yoda as we sat at Ichiraku's and munched on ramen. "You had an emotional break down during the exams then?" My partner said it so casually that I choked on my food a little bit from surprise.

"Try again Jedi, but this time say it quieter, more seriously and look concerned," I suggested as I took a sip of water. "And be more subtle."

"So…" began Yoda, frowning as if worried and lowing his voice as if to say something important and serious. "How are you?"

I rolled my eyes. "Less subtle than that. It needs to be a leading question," I criticized and stuffed my face as if completely unconcerned with the topic of conversation.

"Just answer the question," complained my partner with impatience.

"I'm fine," I said giving him a look that said he better not keep going on about it.

"Nana…" began Yoda with a disapproving glance but I cut him off.

"Really, I am!" I said as I wave my arms in front of me with exasperation. "I've spoken with Inoichi about it so don't worry okay?"

We sat in a tense silence for a few moments.

"You lied to me before," said the ex-ROOT operative with a blank face. "On the roof after the second exam."

"I didn't want to worry you," I muttered feeling guilty again all of a sudden and not meeting my partner's eyes.

"I trust you not to lie to me," Yoda said, frowning and looking almost hurt.

"That wasn't an interrogation room Yoda. If you ask someone a question about how their feeling 50% of the time expect a lie." I took a bite of my meal and shrugged to my partner with a 'what can you do' expression. "You know 'I'm fine' is the most common lie after all," I said softly as I stared off into space thinking about the number of times I'd used those exact words untruthfully.

Then I remembered whom I was talking to. I looked to Yoda quickly and found him thinking fiercely on what I'd just said. "Wait no! Backtrack. Just… people don't want to talk about things like that sometimes. It doesn't mean you can't trust them or that they are lying…"

He wasn't listening to me and I gave up trying to explain emotions to my dysfunctional partner.

_Ahhh, whatever…_ I thought as I began eating again.

"By the way, how is the interrogation going with… you know…?" I asked casually knowing Yoda probably wouldn't read anymore than curiosity into the question.

"It has been rather brutal," said my partner with a contemplative look and a ghost of a smile. _Is it worrying that sadistic tendencies no longer worry, unsettled or even surprise me? Probably._ I hadn't heard any information about Yoroi since the second exam and the not knowing was practically killing me. "A tough one to crack, certainly, but we managed it in the end."

"So you got the answers you were looking for. Good," I nodded. I knew I wouldn't be within the clearance level to know the information revealed inside the interrogation and so I didn't even ask. "Ibiki helped then?"

"Inoichi actually," Yoda said. "I never realized the Yamanaka was so aggressive. Does it have something to do with his emotional connection to you? Ibiki mentioned something about him being worried about you."

I bit down a smirk but shrugged my shoulder. "Now where is Yoroi?"

"He's currently being kept sedated at a secure location." My mind was minutely put to rest on the subject of my still-alive teammate.

Yoda opened his mouth to say something, probably a stupid question, when he was interrupted by a loud shout.

"Four bowls of your finest stuff Ichiraku my man!" announced Naruto as he jumped up onto the stool at the bar. Sasuke settled down on the seat next to me, gave a greeting smirk and ordered his own meal quickly.

"Where's Sakura?" I asked the Uchiha curiously. Before the boy could answer the jinchuriki seemed to notice my presence and cut off his teammate loudly.

"Hey Nana! How are you doing after the fight with Neji? Man, I'm going to make him pay for making you cry! Believe it!"

"Subtle as always Naruto," I mumbled as the blond began to scoff his food with as much sophistication as a rhinoceros in a mud bath. However, I did smile at my friend in appreciation at his defense of me.

"'hat 'happen' oo woo?" Naruto asked as he continued to stuff his face without pausing for breath.

"Don't talk with your mouth full dobe," Sasuke criticized eating his food with all the elegance expected of an Uchiha.

"'ut ud 'eme!" shouted the blond and a very familiar argument between the two genin broke out.

"Nana, judge this competition! I know I'm better than this bastard!" demanded Naruto as he rolled up his sleeve and stood up with an exaggerated flourish. I smiled indulgently at Sasuke as the Uchiha looked at me with deep annoyance and calmly continued with his meal.

"Does this always happen?" Yoda asked me as he watched the two bicker with outright fascination.

"Always," I said with fondness. "But I haven't been asked to judge a competition for a few years."

"Hey Naruto, weren't you supposed to meet Kakashi 2 hours ago?" Sasuke commented, feigning confusion. I muffled a laugh and took another bite of my food as I watched the blond panic, swear and run towards the training fields with a call over his shoulder that it wasn't over.

The three of us laughed in good humor but soon enough Yoda left with the excuse he had some actual, real life work to do.

"Just because you get a month of slacking doesn't mean I do to," complained Yoda. "No fair, we're meant to be a pair. I thought that's what partners were for," he mumbled under his breath as he jumped onto the roofs of the hidden leaf village and disappeared from sight.

A comfortable silence fell between Sasuke and I before I broke the peace with a question.

"So are you working with Kakashi or your family to train up for the final exam?"

"Why do you ask that?" he said with suspicion. I just gave him a looked that said did he think I lived under a rock?

"Your Sharingun…?" I said as if talking to a small child.

"Oh," he commented, then came to life for a split second as he told me his exciting news. "Well actually it's great because after what happened in the forest my brother said he'd train me!"

_Sasuke, you were definitely not meant to mention anything to do with what happened in the forest. I know, because I got the same briefing. Oh well, just pretend I didn't hear it._

"So Kakashi's stuck with Naruto then?" I said, quickly changing the subject. "Better than being stuck with you I suppose."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?!" asked the boy easily taking the bate.

_Ahh goading Sasuke, I'd missed this…_

"Nothing. Just, you know, Naruto would probably learn so much more…." I drifted off with an innocent shrug.

"I'd learn ten times more than the dobe!" he snapped and then frowned as he caught my amused expression. He looked at me with annoyance and went back to his food as he sulked. "Oh, ha. Ha. Ha," he mumbled sarcastically. I just sniggered a little bit and finished my meal. As I paid for my food (and Yoda's who apparently had 'forgotten to pay'. Dammit, I'd get him back) Sasuke looked at me out of the corner of his eye.

"Are you really alright?" he mumbled with a frown. Now, can you just imagine the first Sasuke asking this to someone? You know, that self involved little emo kid?

I grinned at Sasuke and nodded at him sweetly. He looked at me in apprehension as if I was about to do something he wouldn't like. Before I could enact the grabby, love filled hug I had planned for the cutie we were interrupted.

"Sasuke we need to-" Itachi came up behind us suddenly and both the younger Uchiha and I jumped out of our skin at the unexpected presence. I even gave a yap of surprised that caused a few heads to turn and look at where the strange noise was coming from.

"Will you stop doing that," I breathed as I looked at the Uchiha heir in disapproval.

"Oh sorry," Itachi said, not sounding sorry in the slightest. A type of light appeared in his eyes when he looked between to the two of us. "…are you on a date?"

"What?!" shouted Sasuke in genuine horror and seemed to begin to lean away from me. Seeing an opportunity I pounced.

"Oh Sasuke-kun!" I shouted as I threw my arms around him and clung on for dear life. "You don't have to pretend. I'm not embarrassed to be seen in public with you!"

"No!" Sasuke said, trying to remove himself from my clutches and being surprisingly successful. Hmm, must be all the experience dodging and escaping fangirls. "But I am embarrassed to be seen with you!" Sasuke jumped off the stool and stood behind his brother, using Itachi as a type of barrier.

"You can't hide behind me," Itachi said with a quiet laugh.

"I can and I will," Sasuke told his brother in a voice that allowed no argument.

"But Sasuke-kun!" I jumped off the chair as if desperate but the younger Uchiha disappeared down the high street faster than I'd ever seen him move. Funny how that had seemed to be the reaction I'd been getting from a lot of my friends recently.

Itachi laughed as he watched this. I looked to the man in a kind of awe as he freely chuckled at his younger siblings antics, still very unused to this side of him. He seemed so very light and I couldn't help the smile the grace my lips as I heard the sound. Maybe all my suffering and worrying had been worth it if I'd been able to allow this very kind man to be able to laugh freely in his life. He stepped forward quickly and put some money on the counter before giving me a wave and turning and following in his brother's footsteps.

Yet, as Itachi walked away he glanced back at me quickly and our eyes met for a split second. I just smiled and winked at the Uchiha and a flash of amusement shot through his eyes as he turned back around again to leave.

That interaction had been a bit like me and Shikamaru strangely enough. We didn't need to say anything. Itachi wanted to know if I was alright… you know, considering it was him who piggy backed me across the forest of death while I was high. He didn't seem angry anymore, just relieved that everything was all right now.

As soon as he'd turned away I relaxed for a moment, feeling suddenly tired of constantly reassuring people. In my brief instant alone I took a breath and closed my eyes for a second, shaking my head to rid it of anything unwanted.

"You do that," commented a voice and, for the second time within about 5 minutes, I jumped out of my skin. I gave Itachi an unimpressed looked at his reappearance, but in truth he hadn't even moved from where he'd been standing before, and had just simply turned back around again.

"What?" I snapped, annoyed at being caught off guard.

"Your smile; it drops when you think no ones looking." The Uchiha heir looked me up and down with a brief glance, frowning unhappily, before meeting my eyes for a split second. I didn't comment on his words but remained silent and unnerved at Itachi's observation. Eventually he gave another nod and this time I watched him walk away into the crowd until he was swallowed up in the bustling street and out of sight.

I smiled a lot more than usual that day.

!

The rest of the month passed quickly and more often than not I was playing shogi with Shikamaru among with the rest of team 10 as we all lay scattered on the decking or in the Nara back garden.

"You really should train," I said to Shikamaru. "So should you," I scolded Ino as she lay in the grass and played with her hair. "And you should be motivating them," I said to Asuma as he sat on the porch, stole potato chips from Choji and smoked.

"Chill…" said the jounin-sensei. I was pretty sure that tobacco wasn't the only thing he was smoking.

"What about me Nana?" Choji asked stuffing his face.

"Go and do 20 laps of the Nara forest," I said suppressing a smirk. Choji laughed, knowing I had no such expectations of him and was being playfully ironic, but Asuma puffed in a bit too much smoke in shock at my words and started coughing violently.

"If you ever-" cough "manage to get choji to-" cough "do that then I'll take you and team 9 out for a barbeque," Asuma said with a wheezy laugh. I looked at the sensei with amusement and then at Shikamaru and Choji smugly. Both had looks of pure dread on their faces.

"No, Nanami we're not-" Choji began.

"Nana, we don't need to-" Shikamaru started saying.

Before either of them could finish their sentences I grabbed them by the front of the shirt and pulled them into a standing position.

"Ow woman!" complained the lazy Nara as he swatted my hand away.

"I'm not even doing the exams!" Choji wailed, but I wasn't having any excuses.

"Ino!" I shouted, to which she jumped up instantly and saluted to me.

"Yes Sir!" she shouted back.

"Will you be on my team?" I asked innocently to which she nodded smiling and came and stood to my left. Choji and Shikamaru began to pale, recognizing the game from when we were kids, and began to back away slowly.

"Okay we'll do the laps!" Choji screamed and started running. Shikamaru just glared at the puzzled jounin-sensei with unwavering intensity before running off after his friend.

"So, what are you playing?" asked Asuma completely amazed at the picture of Choji running away.

Ino and I just looked at each other in glee before chasing after the boys with loud, wailing battle cries. "Man Hunt!" we screamed together and disappeared around the corner.

I felt like it was a successful afternoon and I'd even got a free meal out of it. Although, Choji refused to talk to me for the rest of the day, so I had to buy him some potato chips and we called it even.

As the final exam drew closer and closer there were no incidents at the hospital that involved a vicious Gaara and terrified genin. I had a feeling that was my doing.

Dosu, however, did go missing for a few days but his remains turned up eventually. Oh well, one less person to worry about during the invasion.

!

I found myself sitting in the stands of the Konoha arena looking down as the proctor called Neji and Naruto to fight. My heart was beating in my chest with pure nerves as I waited with bated breath for the fight to begin.

"Why are you so tense Nanami?" Hanabi asked with mild concern. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Hizashi glance at me in warning.

"Just nervous for Neji is all," I said with a tight smile.

"Don't be nervous; Neji will definitely win," she reassured with childish conviction.

"That's what I'm worried about," I mumbled unintentionally.

My younger cousin looked at me oddly and my father took a breath of patience. I was seated with Hizashi and Hanabi in the crowd on my insistence.

"You're not sitting with us," Hizashi told me with a voice that brooked no argument just as he was preparing to leave the compound and head to the final exams.

"Think of one good reason why not!" I'd cried out with indignation, leaning against his desk.

"Because you'll make unhelpful comments," muttered the man and I looked at him with an unimpressed expression.

"You're a full grown man, somehow I think you'll cope," I said rolling my eyes and putting my hands on my hips.

"But Hanabi won't," he told me with a pointed look, pulling an extra layer on over his shoulders and tying it tightly around his waist with a material belt. Seriously, the Hyuuga needed to stop wearing so many clothes. It was late spring!

"I promise I wont say a single judgmental word," I told him with a serious voice.

"And…?" he said, prompting me with impatience.

"Or anything that might give Hanabi ideas! Okay, okay done now?" I muttered with a pout.

"We are still technically on orders to alienate you from the clan," Hizashi reminded me but I just gave a sigh of exasperation and threw my hands in the air dramatically.

"It's not like it's going to make a different at this point." And it really wouldn't matter considering the invasion was that day and any suspicions from spies surrounding me, like 'oh look Nanami is sitting with her family! I didn't realize they were talking again', would be shadowed in comparison to _an entire invasion_. Somehow, I think the invaders had bigger things to worry about. The secrecy of my mission at that point was mostly a precautionary measure anyway.

"Fine," he said in a blank voice that held undertones of amusement – although he'd never admit it.

"Oh Nanami, are you coming with us to the chunin exams?" Hanabi asked with a smile as she walked calmly into the room.

I greeted her with a light bow and nodded to the child kindly.

I rarely saw the young girl, but from what little time I had spent with her I found she was sweet and quiet but not as kind or gentle as Hinata. She would do well as the leader of the clan one day due to her caring and yet stoic personality. From what I gathered Hanabi loved and idealized Hinata greatly and didn't agree with the harsh treatment 'Hiashi' had put her through. When I had been ostracized (still being ostracized technically as Hizashi hadn't called it off yet) she seemed to follow Hinata's lead and didn't treat me any differently from what she had before.

But, like I said, I never saw much of the girl anyway so I didn't notice much either way.

Naruto and Neji took their position in the arena, both leaking unchallengeable confidence. My brother, however, was verging on arrogance whereas Naruto just seemed as determined and unshakable as always.

"Begin," Hayate shouted and I tried to prepare myself for a long-winded speech about fate.

I suppose I should also mention that Gekko Hayate was still alive and still in charge of the third round. I presume since he didn't over hear Kabuto and Baki, the sand siblings instructor, discussing the invasion then there was no reason for him to die. I ignored the horrible feeling I always got when I witnessed my impact on the world, but I figured I should be more used to it by now.

Naruto, it seemed, was one of those unwavering things that had such a clear-cut path to greatness his actions were hardly effected by my existence in the universe. As such, the fight between Neji and the jinchuriki was extremely similar, minus a few minor differences.

Neji's holier-than-thou attitude came out in full force and he tried his best to put down Naruto and show him how he would always be a failure in life. In reverse, he talked about his natural genius and that because he was a branch family member he would never be completely able to reach his full potential.

_And boo-hoo wasn't fate unfair!?_

God I regretted not being able to pull Neji out of his pity party any sooner. Naruto's shadow clones enclose my brother but he easily fought them off. It was revealed after a small while that the byakugan couldn't seem to distinguish between the shadow clones and the real Naruto.

"No matter," Neji declared, and then enacted revolving heaven to destroy all of the clones and plant the sixty-four palm seal on Naruto, completely blocking off his chakra. The blond held his stomach as if in pain but remained standing and snarling at my brother.

"I don't believe you!" Naruto shouted with a vicious growl. "I believe anybody can be anyone they want to be! Just because people perceive you as one thing doesn't mean you can't grow and change beyond anything anyone ever imagined. Destiny is something you make for yourself. I was dead last once but now I'm going to win this fight!"

"Don't you see?" Neji sneered looking disdainfully at the blond. "No one can escape their fate…" Neji removed the bandage from around his head slowly and with great care. When he revealed the caged bird seal to the world I couldn't help but stare at it with fascination. I'd only ever seen the seal once, the day after Neji had received it, and the mark on his forehead was exactly how I remembered.

Neji went onto bitterly explain his past and it was like I was reliving that time all those years ago. Hizashi and I exchanged a looked as Neji began his tale and I saw the same deep rooted fear in my fathers eyes as I felt in myself. It was the question we had wondered after for many years; how had Neji perceived his fathers "death"?

Not very well apparently.

He talked about Hinata's third birthday and his own subsequent branding. He then told Naruto about the fight within the dojo between Hiashi and Hizashi and how Neji's father had been suppressed using the curse seal simply for feeling injustice over his slavery.

Then he talked about the night our father had died. "He was forced to give his life to save the head of the clan. This is the branch family's destiny; to be in servitude to the main house until our death. It is lonely and suppressive."

"But you had your sister!" Naruto shouted and I swallowed down a lump in my throat as I got dragged into the fight. I suppose I should have seen it coming, after all I was a big part in Neji's life and had been a good friend of Naruto's for many years. "I may not know much about yours and Nana's relationship but I know she would have tried her hardest to care for you. You can't be lonely when you have someone to love you!"

Naruto was so naive in his view of the world - it was sickeningly refreshing. I felt a few pairs of eyes on the back of my head but I pretended to be too engrossed in the fight to really notice or care. I knew what Neji was like and a few choice words about love and freedom couldn't change his mind about anything. He needed to be _shown _that fate was something you made yourself.

I knew better than anyone that nothing was set in stone.

"What could Nanami do? She, by the luck of the gods, was not born with our Kekkei genkai and thus was not sealed. How could she understand?" My brother wasn't facing our direction but, with his byakugan activated, I knew he was looking right at me. Naruto was silent for a moment, looking down to the floor with clenched hands.

"Did your sister ever tell you about the day that her and I became friends?" My heart clenched at Naruto's words and a sad smile made it's way onto my face.

"As I recall she got beaten up," Neji observed, clearly curious at where the blond was going with this.

"That's not how I remember it," Naruto counteracted smiling at the memory. "She was my first real friend in the world, you know. As far as I saw she had friends and loved one and she was pretty happy with life. But when these kids started picking on me she just turned around and started a fight; her first day and with kids in the year above she picks a fight. _For me_! No one had ever given me the time of day before, let alone stood up for me.

"And then she won. I just stood there dumb struck as she fought off these older kids like it was nothing. I didn't even think of joining in I was just so amazed. So when she turned around and asked me why I didn't help her I felt so bad. She had been there for me, this random girl who didn't even know who I was, and I didn't even give her a hand.

"I felt terrible for not helping when it was _my own _fight. Now, like I said I don't know anything about yours and Nana's relationship, but I know she would have had your back for years now, supporting you and giving you as much love as she possibly could. Because she's that type of person and I wonder… were you there for her when she needed it? Because I'd put money on no, you weren't."

Neji didn't seem to react to the allegation but I knew my brother enough to know that Naruto had said something that deeply unsettled him. Naruto continued when he didn't answer the question.

"And then she told me that in the future I was big enough and ugly enough to sort myself out. But I know that Nanami has my back if I need it. And I have her back as well! All these things about her being a bad ninja are complete crap. Nana's one of the strongest, kindest people I know! She can't even use ninjutsu and yet she graduated the academy a year before everyone else.

"She saw that I was this little kid with no friends and she seemed to understand that I needed help. So don't you tell me that she wouldn't understand _you_; her own brother. Its like she can read minds, she knows exactly what's going through everybody's head. She tried to help you just like she tried to help me. The only difference is you're so self absorbed you wouldn't even notice someone reaching out in kindness."

_Oh Naruto, I'd never realized how much it had meant to you._

"Like I said; she has been fated with great luck, even if she is lacking in other skills," Neji said, bitingly. "I don't see her standing in the arena now. From what I hear, she couldn't even keep her teammates alive in the second exam. Some people don't deserve support when they have dishonored themselves so shamefully." I knew he was lashing out as he felt uncertainty rise up within him from Naruto's words, but that didn't make it any better. I could almost feel Neji's intention to hurt me, but unfortunately for him I just felt boiling, furious anger.

Oh. No. He. Didn't.

"Don't. You. Dare," hissed Hizashi in my ear as he reach across and pushed me back down into my seat. I hadn't even noticed I'd stood up.

"What?" I hissed back. "I was just going to call him a self righteous little prick."

Hizashi pinched the bridge of his nose in utter horror and embarrassment and gave me a death glare worthy of a tailed beast. I just sat down peacefully and looked back to the arena, thoroughly chastised. Before Hanabi could open her mouth and ask what a 'prick' was she was interrupted by Naruto's determined exclamations.

"Right, that's it! Let's fight!" Naruto shouted, tired of the verbal battle, and the volatile kyuubi chakra began leaking out of all of his pours. "No one talks about my friends like that! I'm going to show you how as long as you wish to be something, you can do anything! For Hinata, for Nanami and for my own satisfaction of kicking your ass!"

"You might as well give up!" exclaimed Neji with arrogant triumph. "You have no chakra available to you. Your chances were slim before but now they are nonexistent."

And so Naruto, of course, started using the Kyuubi chakra.

"Never a dull moment Naruto," I mumbled with a small smile.

Naruto and Neji's battle grew even more vicious and quick, but with Neji's chakra surely near depleted and Naruto having taken multiple unhealthy beatings, it seemed like it was drawing to an end as both boys grew more and more exhausted. Naruto, in a last ditch effort it seemed, charged at Neji with a significant force behind his blow. The Hyuuga genius predicted the move and skillfully used the revolving heaven once again to deflect the fist.

Both genin were flung apart and dust and smoke rose in the arena, obscuring the outcome of the clash. When it was revealed that Neji was still standing and Naruto had been knocked out cold the crowd erupted in cheers.

"Neji won!" Hanabi cheered as she clapped her hands and looked to me with a smile. When she saw I wasn't celebrating her smile dropped. "Nana?"

"It's not over yet," I told the young girl.

"Thank you for proving me right. You were always destined to lose this fight," Neji shouted across the arena towards the downed blond. "My natural genius was no match for your-"

As in my memories, Naruto burst from the ground of the arena and landed an uppercut to the Hyuuga genius' chin.

"Will you shut up?!" Naruto sneered at my brother with a victorious grin. Neji fell to the floor unconscious and the painful fight was finally over. It was then that I allowed myself to cheer along side the rest of the audience.

As I clapped I glanced over at my father but he didn't meet my eyes; he just sat looking at his hands in shame and deep pain.

He caught my eye and I restrained the urge to say 'I told you so'. I didn't say anything judgmental, just like I promised I wouldn't, and instead I just looked away from my father with a tight jaw and a blank face.

That seemed to be all the convincing he needed. Hizashi left before the next fight began.

Shikamaru and Temai's battle was intense to say the least; intense for them, that is. Once the initial situation had been set, with Temari stuck in a position that meant she couldn't move and Shikamaru patiently and calmly watching and waiting for her to make a misstep, things started to get a little boring for the crowd. So much so that half way through Hanabi and I got up to go and get some sugared nuts and a cup of tea and when we came back still nothing had happened.

"Isn't he your friend?" Hanabi ask with slight accusation.

"Yeah, but he's usually not this boring," I told her with a helpless shrug. Eventually the fight ended with Shikamaru catching Temari in his shadow jutsu but then forfeiting the match due to his depleted chakra. It was overly anti-climatic and the audience was fitfully unimpressed.

Kankuro and Ino's fight was cancelled, much to Ino's relief, when the sand genin forfeited before the whole procession had even begun.

"Gaara verses Uchiha Sasuke," Hayate called from the centre of the arena once the area had been cleared. I glanced subtly behind me and saw the ANBU and jounin in the crowd making discrete formations. I stood up slowly and started to make my way to the examinee's waiting stand.

"And where do you think your going?" grumbled Hanabi with anger at almost being ditched. Oh right, yeah I forgot about her. I turned around quickly and knelt down to the seven year olds eye level.

"I need to speak to my friends," I said with urgency that the bright young child picked up on instantly.

"Nana, is everything alright?" she asked concerned.

"Everything is fine, Hanabi. But I need you to stay with Suki until your father comes to get you." I glanced at Suki who was sitting a few rows behind and beckoned her over. The surrogate mother seemed displeased at being called like a dog but approached us nonetheless. Suki agreed to with stay with Hanabi and keep her safe and with this agreement I ran towards the exam participants observation booth so that I could warn my friends and have their back during the conflict.

On my way I unintentionally ran past the medical bay door and saw that Hizashi and Neji were still talking.

_Come on people time is of the essence!_

"Umm, guys?" I said as I stuck my head in the room. "Just to warn you there is going to be an invasion in five minutes. Just in case you wanted to wrap it up." Neji and Hizashi looked to me with surprise at my interruption but quickly Hizashi nodded, being a jounin and thus been made aware of the invasion, and made his way out of the room and rounded the corner. But not before asking where Hanabi was to which I reassured him she was in Suki's safe hands.

I turned to follow after my father but was stopped by Neji's call. I looked over my shoulder and saw that he had his head bowed and was looking at something in his lap.

"This letter…" Neji said, gesturing to what he held tightly in his hand. "It's from father before he…" He looked up at me with wide, open eyes that told me he'd just been on the brink of tears. "It explains his choice." I smiled softly at my brother and felt a small spark of hope flitter in my chest.

"I don't need to see it," I told Neji. "I have no doubt that our father loved his brother and that the end was his choice." That was a lie considering our father was still alive and hadn't gotten the choice to end his life but had that taken away from him as well, but Neji didn't need to know that right this second (not that I could tell him, mind). "It's what family is for after all," I mumbled, giving Neji a sideways looks that subtly said 'haha I told you so'. He just frowned and looked unsure.

"Why didn't you-"

"Say anything?" I question with a quirk of the lips. "Would it have changed your mind? I know you very well Neji and you're stupidly stubborn and you have this idea that you should do everything your self." I smiled sadly at the person I probably loved more in the world than anyone else. "Maybe that could change now…"

"Hiashi said that things with you at the moment aren't exactly what they appear," Neji said as he stared at me with a frown. "He said that you're very much like father was."

"Did he now?" I asked with an exasperated expression, uncertain how I should react. I guess my father was trying to make up for something or he truly saw what my broken relationship with Neji was doing to me.

"What did he mean?" Neji asked, almost scared to hear the answer. "You've been lying about something, I know that, but-" The entire stadium rumbled from Gaara and Sasuke's fight and both Neji and I visibly had to steady ourselves.

"I'll tell you when this is all over, okay?" I reassured, hovering by the door and realizing time was of the essence. Any anger or frustration I had felt towards my brother was taking a necessary backseat in light of the coming situation.

"Nana-"

"I promise. After the invasion, yeah?" I told my brother as I turned around and sprinted out the door. I caught up with Hizashi pretty quickly as he was walking at a more moderate pace.

"You gave him a letter?" I asked Hizashi, suppressing a smirk as I strolled besides him.

"I told you I am not his father and so cannot help him. The letter his father wrote before his death, however, might be sufficient enough," said the clan head blankly.

"You wrote it 10 minutes ago didn't you?" I chuckled as a giddy feeling grew inside me. Hizashi looked down at me with a raised eyebrow and I smiled back at him.

"Haven't you got somewhere to be?" my father sighed, obviously emotionally spent because he was actually _talking _to his son for once.

"You did right this time. In case you were wondering," I reassured my father as I picked up my pace and jogged forward, but not before turning around and smiling carelessly. "I think Neji will be fine now," I said with a tilt of the head.

I ran towards my destination with a grin, not at all bothered by the invasion that was about to land at our doorstep, and although I didn't turn around and look back again I knew that Hizashi was trying with all his might to suppress a smile.

And that he was failing.

!

**The feels guys… the feels. I did not think that this chapter would be so long! I was originally planning to put the invasion in here to but it just got too long. So you'll have to wait for the next installment to find that one out! I'd love to hear your theories on how you think that will play out!**

**Oh Naruto. You are just too precious! That little speech was a complete joy to write. I hope Nanami came across as realistically trying to get over her issues and her friends fitfully enough concerned with her. I hope the change and growth in different relationships is obvious but interesting. Also, a lot of you after my post in the previous chapter seemed to be in huge support of Nanami's character so thank you for your feedback and support. She's definitely appreciates it! Hopefully this chapter was up to scratch for her.**

**Please let me know what you think and thank you thank you thank you for your lovely words! I've actually booked a creative writing course for late September so that I can develop more as an author and write better and better chapters for you guys! **

**So, until next time…**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

_**Brief summary of key points in story so far from Chapters 1 – 14:**_

_Nanami, at 2, gains her memory of a previous life._

_When she's 3 Neji gets the curse seal._

_Hisashi gets killed after Hinata's kidnapping instead of Hizashi and as a result had to take his brothers place as head of the Hyuuga with only the elders of the clan knowing._

_Nanami, unfortunately, recognizes her father and received the curse seal on her neck to stop her from speaking about the swap (as she's the only branch family member without one) …but could there possibly be another reason?_

_At 5 she starts school and makes friends with Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru and Choji. Meanwhile she plays Shoji with her father on Sundays. She also meets Shikaku and Itachi._

_At 6 Nanami discovers that she has deformed chakra coils because of an "unknown" spiritual change when she was a very young child (her memories from her past life came back) and thus she will not be able to perform much ninjutsu._

_At 8 she gets informed that an arranged marriage has been decided but because of the delicate state of affaires the match will not be announced until they both come of age at 18._

_She realizes that the Uchiha massacre didn't take place._

_Nana then gets recruited by T&I and is partnered and starts training with Yoda._

_In preparation for her new job she begins training with Inoichi._

_At 11 she becomes a genin and believes that Sasuke will be her future husband._

_For a year she works in T&I with Yoda as her partner but when an interrogation turns sour she is given an undercover mission concerning Kabuto._

_Nana and Neji have a huge falling out._

_The rookie 9 become genin._

_She works with team 13 for 6 months, uncovers that they are spies, and has been ordered to eliminate her target._

_During the Chunin exams she eliminates Kabuto and allows for Yoroi to get captured. Itachi saves her and begins to get suspicious._

_The preliminary exams pass with a few changes but nothing extreme. During Hinata and Neji's fight Nanami interferes and faces Neji. When he throws hash words at her she breaks and runs away._

_The month between the preliminary and exams Nanami gets better, talks with Shikamaru and Inoichi, has an interesting discussion with Gaara about friends and family and reassures Itachi of her health._

_During the 3rd round of the exams Neji is knocked down a peg by Naruto who shows him how great and loving Nanami is._

_Neji and Hizashi talk. _

_The invasion has begun._

!

_"I wondered if that was how forgiveness budded; not with the fanfare of epiphany, but with pain gathering its things, packing up, and slipping away unannounced in the middle of the night." _― Khaled Hosseini, The Kite Runner

_"In a closed society where everybody's guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity." - Hunter S. Thompson_

!

As I made my way back to the arena I began to pass people asleep in the corridors. The genjutsu, I realized, must have been activated while I was with Neji. I marveled briefly in relief at my lack of ability to feel the affects of genjutsu.

The invasion had begun by the time I made it to the viewing box where the chunin contestants had been situated. The box was relatively well covered from most of the fighting, being lower to the ground than the stands, but I still I ducked down into a crouch on the floor to avoid any wayward projectiles that may have come flying my way. Ino, Shikamaru and Naruto were fast asleep on the floor and I moved quickly towards their forms to wake them. When I found Shikamaru feigning unconsciousness I tutted in disapproval and gave him a forceful kick in the arm.

"Hey!" shouted the lazy boy, opening his eyes and glaring up at me. I ignored his expression and knelt down besides Ino and Naruto, who were actually unconscious from the sleeping gentjutsu, and inserted a burst of chakra into their system.

"Take Naruto and go and find Sasuke and Sakura," I told Shikamaru with a serious look. My best friend wasn't stupid: he knew I'd known something more about the exam than what I was letting on and his annoyance at me disappeared instantly.

He nodded his head sharply. "Where will we find them?" he asked, getting up quickly and crouching down next to Ino to help the disorientated girl sit up.

"Sasuke ran out of the building following Gaara, yes?" He gave another nod in confirmation. "Find Sakura in the stands and go back him up."

"Nana, what's going on?" asked Naruto, still half asleep and slow to understand the urgency.

"Just listen to Shikamaru," I told the blond impatiently as I dragged him to his feet. I motioned for us to move and as a unit we headed back into the protection of the hallway and grouped together against the wall.

"Ino; not everyone was knocked out by the genjutsu. I need you to go and wake Choji and possibly Kiba and help evacuate any civilians that are still awake," I told them as I gestured in the direction I wanted them to move. Everyone nodded, Naruto in a very confused manner, and we all split apart heading in different directions.

I began to head back into the viewing box so I could make a calculated decision on whom to assist next when I felt Shikamaru grab my hand.

"Be careful," he told me with earnest and great worry. I nodded gravely before we separated.

When I looked out into the arena my mouth fell open in astonishment at what I saw.

Just like in my memories the sound four had erected a large barrier and inside fought the third hokage and the snake sannin himself. However, there was a third person thrown into the giant purple box and a spike of hope ran up my spine.

_Itachi… If the Uchiha genius is in there to assist the Hokage then maybe the third will come out of this encounter alive, and maybe Orochimaru won't!_

Surrounding the shield were various ANBU operatives attempting to penetrate the outer layer but failing miserably. I knew I could not (and frankly didn't want to) assist and so I went and did what I could for those who could not do anything. That is; the civilians not in their seats, those who had been standing or walking when the genjutsu struck, were in extremely awkward places and in grave danger from wayward attacks.

I put it upon myself to both wake up these people and fight off all those who might mean them harm. I was by no means a melee fighter, but due to my taijutsu dependent abilities close combat and genjutsu was all I was really good for. However, I knew I would need my chakra to wake up as many people as possible and so I decided I would just depend on my boe staff and only rely on chakra if I had no other option. Using the maximum amount of chakra I could push through my broken coils, I coated my feet and hands in the natural energy and I climbed out of the viewing box making my way into the crowds of people. As soon as I had put two feet on the ground I felt a presence approach me at a fast pace and, quickly grabbing my staff off of my back, I spun the wooden pole over my head with precise skill.

I felt the staff connect with the assailant's face and the tell tale crunch of a nose being crushed. I spun around and forced my staff into the centre of the Suna ninja's chest, successfully winding him and causing the man to stumble backwards and collapse. For extra certainty that he wouldn't be getting up again anytime soon I flung my boe staff around once more and, as it connected with the ninja's head, knocked him out cold.

As I went about my task attempting to evacuate the civilians I had to pause twice more to take care of an opponent, but other than that few enemy ninja bothered me. I was the aid and there were more important, threatening jounin around to take care off. Ino had followed my instruction and had evacuated all those still awake. Her, Kiba and Choji then looked to me to give them more instructions; their jounin sensei's much too busy with fighting off enermy-nin to direct them, and I fulfilled my role as temporary leader as best I could. I paired up with Kiba and we went around finding vulnerable civilians, waking them and escorting them to lower, more protected levels of the building. Choji and Ino worked together in the same way and our efficient team skills allowed us to do the task easily.

Every now and again I would look over to the roof where the Hokage and Itachi were fighting Orochimaru, but the fight was too fast paced to make much out and I was too busy helping people. I prayed to whoever was listening that everything would end happily.

All was running smoothly (as smoothly as an invasion could go, anyhow) until _he _turned up.

I was distracted from my protective job for a second by a figure entering the arena. I glanced their way briefly, busy helping an elderly gentleman to his feet, and my stomach dropped when I caught sight of the last person I wanted to see. The man in question spotted me instantly and grinned with a sickeningly, twisted expression. He began to run towards my position in the crowd and I knew from his clear tunnel vision he only had eyes for me. I knew this would not be a subtle fight. This wasn't about an invasion; there was no chakra rationing so that you could move onto your next opponent; he was simply here to fight me in revenge for his own humiliation and his comrade's death.

"Hey, isn't that your old teammate? I thought you said he was dead," Kiba pointed out when he saw Yoroi approaching. I ignored the comment and surveyed my surrounding. I needed to back up into a more open area so that the eventual conflicted wouldn't accidently harm one of the sleeping civilians, but there was nowhere available. The only place with enough space to fight freely would be…

_The roof!_

I dodged out of his way as he came within fighting range. I sprinted to the edge of the audience stands and, looking behind me to check that he was following, I made a big jump, latched onto the drainpipe on the roof and pulled myself up onto the tiles.

From where I stood I was exactly on the opposite side of the arena from Orochimaru's fight, but dotted around other parts of the roof were similar fights to my own; too aggressive to be near any civilians and too difficult to move to another part of the village.

Yoroi was seconds behind me in pursuit. I turned and fully face my old teammate, holding my boe staff tightly in my hand and positioned ready to fight off his attacks. My Chakra felt a little low, after disrupting so many civilians genjutsu, and thus my energy levels suffered because of that. I was pretty sure I could take on Yoroi despite this and so I allowed a smug confident grin to make its way on to my face. As predicted this made the man pause briefly and assess my condition.

I knew how Yoroi acted and I began to calculate ways I could unsettle him with goading comments and mocking expression. Yet as we stood face to face I realized he had a sort of deranged look in his eye. I'd seen that look before; it was the same expression from the chunin Yoda and I had interrogated all those month ago. This was an expression that told me Yoroi would not hold anything back and that he was a desperate man who had nothing to lose.

And those are the most dangerous types of people in a fight.

My body tensed as I prepared to battle my opponent.

"You're going to pay for what you did," spat Yoroi as he clicked his neck in an eerie fashion and crouched down low and clearly ready to charge at full pelt.

"It's not like it was difficult to knock you out!" I shouted back, my posture leaking confidence.

"Oh, I'm going to enjoy hurting you little girl," sneered the teen before flinging himself at me with reckless abandon and vicious intentions.

I dodged out of the way of his glowing palm by jumping to the left and pulling out my staff ready to ward off his attacks. My old teammate didn't let up for a second and threw himself again into a brutal assault. His lack of hesitance left him fully open and I took the opportunity to force my staff into his side and I felt two ribs collapse under the pressure of the blow.

The Oto spy didn't even flinch at the breakage and, taking me by surprise by not reacting, he moved around and grabbed, firmly, onto my shoulder. I cried out involuntarily at the pressure but didn't register the sudden and painful drop of energy for a few moments. As soon as I got my bearings I shifted my weight, grabbed Yoroi under his arm and threw him over my shoulder, breaking physical contact.

Yoroi's chakra absorbing jutsu could be excessively dangerous to someone in my position. Due to the difficulty to push chakra through my pores this meant that if I were to lose a large amount of chakra then it would be a difficult and long recovery process.

_Okay, so no touchy glowing hands again…_

I instantly turned around, my boe staff flying through the air and taking aim at Yoroi's head. The Oto spy clumsily blocked the blow and deflected the staff away. I could feel the drain that my opponent had inflicted on my energy and I knew that I couldn't endure many more instances of such contact.

"Is that all you've got? If I could take Kabuto, I could take you," I egged him on as I jumped away from the shinobi and took a few moments to regain my breath.

Yoroi's nostals flared as he staggered backwards and his eyes rolled into his head. A manic grin spread across his face as energy clearly came into his body in waves of pleasure.

"You're chakra is so… different," hissed the man, quivering with what seemed like burning desire. "I don't know how I haven't tasted it before."

Suddenly his eyes seemed greedy and determined. It was as if he no longer saw me but instead a type of power he didn't understand and craved. He looked like what I'd imagined Sasuke would look like when he'd gazed at Orochimaru in his previous life and desired the power he held.

"I'm going to enjoy this more than I thought I would," said the boy with a hissing sound and licking his lips repulsively. A sixth sense overcame me for a moment and I knew I had to end this fight soon.

Yoroi went for me again, clumsily but with obvious killer intent, and there began the dance of strike and deflect and strike and dodge, with myself not attempting to land a signal blow. I knew my opponent was stronger than I and that overpowering him wouldn't be within my capabilities; therefore I had to be smart about my attack.

I assessed the area quickly and tried to locate something that would give me the upper hand and/or incapacitate my opponent long enough for me to deliver a fatal blow. There were simply tiles and the odd chimneys dotted around the roof but I couldn't see much in the environment that could help out my situation. However, when I'd spotted a loose tile an idea flashed through my mind.

I moved swiftly out of Yoroi's attack and began to form a set of hand seals expertly while still holding my staff.

"You won't be able to do any ninjutsu on me, we both know you have no-" he was cut off suddenly by the illusion I'd place on him, clearly overcome by fear at what he was seeing, but quickly realized what it was and dispelled the fantasy. His moment of inattention was all I needed to land a fierce disabling blow to his private parts. Despite the male ninja in this world being trained, deadly killers they still didn't, for some strange reason, expect anyone to kick them in their private parts during a battle and so Yoroi seemed extremely surprise as he involuntarily curled in on himself with the pain.

However, I'd miscalculated my movement annoyingly and the older teen reached out and blindly grabbed onto my blazer as I began to jump away. He was clearly in great pain but, as his hand lightly brushed my skin, I felt the more chakra begin to drain out of me and Yoroi's pain seemed to recede somewhat due to the extra boast of chakra in his system. As he regained his strength he took a step backwards and pulled me with him, obviously with the intention to capture me in a type of bear hug so I would be unable to escape from his absorbing jutsu.

Luckily for me it was in this moment that his foot met the loose tile I'd been aiming for him to step on when I'd kicked him and the Oto-nin became unbalanced.

He went down hard, with myself just managing to stay clear of his reach, but although I'd managed to dislodge his grip on my clothes, I still fell next to the boy and found myself in an extremely vulnerable position. Yoroi was obviously winded but still conscious and fixated on absorbing my chakra.

With quick movements I tried to scamper away on my knees but regretted it immediately as Yoroi grabbed hold of my leg and almost brought me down on the tiles. The contact drained me of my chakra significantly quicker than before and I found myself getting light headed by the minute contact. But my mind remained clear and I kicked at my ex-team mates face, dislodging his hold and jumping into the air.

With the momentum behind my jump I swung around with my staff and it collided with Yoroi's back aggressively. I felt the unnatural movement of a disk in his spine slipping out of place. He screamed in agony but I didn't pause to give him reprieve. With the back movement from the boe staff I drew it up behind my shoulder like a javelin and launched it, with all my meager strength into Yoroi's face. His nose collapsed and a gurgling cry escaped from his lips.

The crippled boy tried to stand up, screaming through the bloody remnants of his face, but couldn't seemed to move from both pain and disability.

I reached down, held his head between my hands and twisted them violently. Thus, I stood over my ex-teammate's dead body with a tired sigh.

I'd never felt so exhausted in my life. My left arm felt numb like I was going into cardiac arrest, my throat felt dry, my eyes were heavy and I couldn't quite shake the feeling as if I had stood up too fast. I looked down to Yoroi's disfigured head with disgust and annoyance.

_Dammit, it feels like Yoroi has drained me of most of my life source. This chakra exhaustion thing is horrible._

I stood still and half asleep from the heavy feeling in my head when I was startled into action by the noise of a large explosion coming from the fight between the Hokage, Orochimaru and Itachi. I couldn't see much of what was going on and hadn't been keeping track but from what I understood it wasn't looking good for any of the parties involved. Orochimaru had lost the use of his arms, the third Hokage looked unconscious if not worse, and Itachi looked exhausted of chakra and any ability to fight.

"Get down!" I heard a voice shout and I looked up to see the snake sannin and the Uchiha genius go in for a last collision. I could see this would be a clash of chakra and wills and would be painful for anybody within a 100-foot radius; and that included me.

Knowing I had the time to move out of the line of fire I began to stumble away from the fight, but before I could I spotted a few civilians that were still fighting their way out of the arena. At some point the genjutsu had been completely lifted and most people who had been asleep had managed to evacuate the stadium. However, there were a few stragglers, including a young woman and her toddler, and I knew they would be hurt if they did not find cover.

_But I also need to find cover. But the mother and child won't find cover in time. But I also need to find cover. But the mother and child…_

_Oh, for fuck sake._

Orochimaru and Uchiha Itachi both unleashed their most volatile jutsu and an ear shattering bang filling the whole of the hidden leaf.

I jumped down to the woman and her child and placed myself between the blast and them. The last thing I remembered before blacking out was a searing burning at my side and an immeasurable force press against my back.

!

I opened my eyes to brightness and pain. These two things disorientated me for a short moment before my shinobi training kicked in and the need to evaluate the situation overcame me.

Apart from an aching sensation all around my body, the first thing I noticed was a slight pressure on the side of my leg and hand. Slowly I turned my head to locate the cause. When I saw Neji's head resting on my bed, eyes closed and his hand gently curled around mine I didn't notice or even care about anything else, because the person I loved more than anyone in the world was here with me again.

I closed my eyes and lent back onto my pillow. I knew in my heart that that worst of the storm between my brother and I had passed. My body ached and my head pounded but I just let the world wash over me and relaxed for a little while. Neji began to stir a few minutes later and I looked to find him raising his head off of my leg. The young boy looked up and out the window, blinking a few times to dislodge the sleepiness from his eyes and then glanced at me briefly to check I was still there.

He stared at me with blank eyes for a moment, not really registering what he was seeing. The moment he realized I was awake his mouth fell open in surprise and relief flittered across his face.

"Nanami, you're awake," he breathed and held my hand more tightly. My brother was not an affectionate person by any means, thus the mere physical contact of holding my hand revealed much to me.

Neji had been terrified of losing me.

"Hey," I whispered, my voice croaking with lack of use and little water. Neji passed me a glass and with my free hand I drunk greedily until my thirst was parched. "How long?"

"A week," he said, his eyes intensely fixed on me.

"What happened?" I muttered, a sudden wave of pain shooting up my side. I grimaced involuntary and Neji's eyes opened a fraction wider.

"I'll get the nurse," he said with quick words and left the room before I could protest. The nurse came in moments later and checked me over. She gave me more painkillers and said that I wasn't to move for at least three days until the burns I'd suffered completely healed. Mikata's skilled hands had tended me themselves and thus I was told I wouldn't suffer any scars or long-term issues. She explained to me I had obtained most of my injures during the explosion within the arena and myself, along with 7 jounin, 2 chunin and 18 civilians were in the same position. As well as that I'd withstood extreme chakra exhaustion and due to my deformed coils it had taken twice as long to restore me to full health as everyone else. In fact, I'd been the last of the shinobi to wake up by 4 days and she told me I'd remain in the hospital for at least another week.

Now I understood why Neji was so scared for me

Before she left the nurse gave me a look that said I should be mightily grateful to have such a medic as Mikata at my service.

"What happened then? Between the Hokage, Orochimaru and Uchiha Itachi?" I asked Neji after a few minutes silence as I repositioned myself into a sitting position.

"Orochimaru has been eliminated but… the Hokage was killed," Neji said with a brief pause in a monotonous voice.

"Oh wow… but I guessed I expected as much," I breathed out. "Tell me what happened."

Neji explained, as if giving a mission report, what had been released to the public about the battle against Orochimaru. Apparently after a barrier had been created, preventing any external intervention, Orochimaru had used the reincarnation jutsu and recalled the first and second Hokages from the dead to fight off the Third and Itachi. Itachi managed to win against the two Hokages while the Sandaime fought with his old student. Long story short, the Third Hokage ended up using something called the 'dead demon consuming seal' and sealed the use of Orochimaru's arms at the cost of his own life. Itachi, being preoccupied with the dead Hokages at the time, hadn't been able to stop the sacrifice. However, the third's selflessness had allowed Itachi to fight against the snake sannin, even in his chakra exhausted state.

The group that called themselves the Sound four and who had been the ones to erect the shield around the fight, dropped the barrier and attempted to evacuate Orochimaru from the scene. This, unfortunately for them, hadn't gone to plan and the ANBU who had been waiting for that exact moment disposed of quartet with very little problem. Thus there was a quick fight between the Uchiha heir and the snake sannin that ended in a volatile explosion, the injuries of those mentioned, and Orochimaru's death.

_Orochimaru was… dead. _

I decided to think on that at a later time.

"…the funeral for the Hokage and all those killed in the invasion was held yesterday." He finished and looked down at his hands.

"Hyuuga casualties?" I asked with hesitance.

"Minimal. Remarkably no fatalities."

We sat in silence again. "The new Hokage?" I asked. _God, it was like trying to get blood out of a stone._

"They haven't released the new candidates yet. But you have your suspicions I suppose?" Neji looked up at me with a wry expression but schooled it before it could resemble anything familiar to the relationship we once had.

"Care to take a bet?" I said with a wicked grin to the side. He just looked at me with a frown and my smile dropped.

"What?" I asked in a small voice, scared he was going to bring up something that I really didn't want to explain right at that second. I wasn't stupid; I knew something had changed in Neji. It could have been the scare with my injuries or it could have been Naruto's words hitting home or it could have been…

"Everyone found out didn't they?" I said with a flinch.

Neji nodded, his stare never leaving my face and a blank expression plastered on his.

"Dammit, and I didn't even get to do the big unveil," I joked with a wry grimace as I looked out the window, finding it difficult to meet my brothers eyes.

"Nana… I-" Neji cut himself off and I witness something I hadn't seen since we were small children; Neji being over come with emotion. His voice cracked and there was a raspy quality to it that made me feel uncomfortable as it came from such a usually emotionally together person. "…I'm so sorry. After everything you've done and I-"

"What have you heard?" I asked, cutting him off, still not making eye contact.

"That you've been working under cover since getting suspended from torture and interrogation," Neji said with a sigh. "And that your… your shameful situation within both the clan and village was an orchestrated lie concocted so that you may affectively spy for the leaf village and gain information for the invasion."

"That's it?" I asked with a twinge of hope.

"What else _is_ there?" Neji's voice was full of stress and dread, as if he really didn't want to know that there were more and worse things that had been done by his sister in the name of the village.

"No… nothing," I said with a small smile, looking to my brother and attempting to keep my voice even as I spoke. I really didn't want people to know about the assassination I'd done. Although I knew and understood that it was necessary, and thanks to Inoichi's counseling I'd come to terms with the idea of taking a life, I still felt uneasy talking about the mission and wouldn't feel completely comfortable with my peers knowing about the terrible deed just yet. Also, I didn't know if my generation was yet mature enough to deal with the idea of assassination assignments, especially long-term integration where you gain trust and friendship and then take said trusted person's life.

Neji didn't seem to have anything to say and so we sat in a semi-awkward silence. I didn't know what I could say to my brother after everything that had happened. I glanced to the side and saw that his features were twisted in anguish; he obviously felt guilty.

"Have you spoken to Hiashi-sama about this?" I looked gently at my brother and squeezed his hand. He pulled away quickly when he realized he was still holding onto me and I felt saddened at the loss of contact.

"Hiashi said he agreed to the…" Neji's jaw tightened again and a minute amount of anger flickered across his face. "He said that he was given the option and if he didn't want to put you on such a mission then he was within his rights to reject the mission on your behalf."

"I guess he knew me well enough to know what I'd want," I said sadly.

"Yes… he said that too. He said you were too much of a good shinobi to turn down something that would help the village so significantly." Neji looked ashamed that he could have ever thought any differently of me.

"He said that?" I suppressed a smile of pride as I heard those words. _Dammit, I still get that little burst of happiness when I hear my father praise me. What a child…_

"I've got the letter," Neji said, breaking my inner musing as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a rolled up scroll and showed it to me earnestly. "He was your father as well, I thought you might want to…"

I took the letter from Neji's hand carefully and looked over it with a light smile. Hizashi was very… thorough. I respected him for his words but I also felt extremely uncomfortable about reading and mourning over them when I knew he was alive and well. But then again, I suppose the father that both Neji and I knew when we were small children really had died years ago. The Hizahsi I knew now was a different person; more harsh and also in more pain.

"Does it give you closure?" I glanced to the side at my brother and wondered if he'd ever find out the truth, and whether his finding out would be a good thing or a disastrous one.

"I think so," he said with a frown. He looked up at me intensely. "What about you?"

"I never needed closure Neji," I said with a sad smile.

"I know you didn't. You forgave the clan with little fuss. You forgive the faults of others far to easily sister." Neji looked at me with a raised chin and a sturdy expression. Quickly and unexpectedly he stood up, moved away from his chair, got down onto his hands and knees and bowed in the lowest, most respectable position anyone could be presented with. With his head touching the floor and his voice lightly shaking he offered me the only thing he believed would make up for his behavior; his honor as a shinobi.

"Get up you look like an idiot," I said with a smile as I reach behind me and threw a pillow at him. I regretted the action as soon as I did it and cried out in pain at the sudden movement. Neji jumped to his feet, placed the pillow behind my head quickly and pushed me back against it gently with a very disapproving expression.

"I was planning my apology to go much more smoothly than that." He gave me an irritated scowl.

"Yeah well, a good ninja has a contingency plan," I told him with an amused wink. He just continued to stare at me seriously.

"Please, Nana just listen-"

"I completely forgive you, brother!" I cried, an exasperated laugh escaping from my chest. "I think I forgave you as soon as I woke up. In fact, I practically knew you were going to come to your senses eventually and forgave you when-"

I was cut off as my brother reached out and very gently, as if I were made of the most delicate of glass, gave me a hug. My throat constricted at his words and actions. It told me, more than any display, how truly sorry he was and how much he wanted to make it up to me – how he'd probably spend the rest of our lives trying to make it up to me. I moved my arms carefully and hugged him back. I hadn't hugged Neji in a long time and I freely let the water gathering in the corner of my eyes fall down my face.

I had my brother back again and words couldn't describe the unexpected relief and joy I found in his presence.

"Thank you," he whispered with emotion.

"No problem," I told him with as equally as croaky voice.

!

Neji left later that day to inform the clan, particularly Hinata who had been in and out the hospital almost as much as Neji, about my waking up. He promised he'd be back that evening.

Yoda popped up soon after my brother had left.

"So who told everyone?" I asked my partner as we shared a cup of tea Yoda had managed to sneak past the nurses. Apparently caffeinated drinks were prohibited during recuperation. I'd gotten into an argument with the nurses that afternoon when they hadn't let me have coffee and I'd managed to bargain with Yoda to at least get me some tea.

"It was Shikamaru actually," Yoda told me with an amused smile.

"What…?" I was very surprised to hear the lazy, apathetic Nara had gone out of his way to spread information and tell others about something that wasn't his business.

"I was there actually and the verbal fight that ensued was highly amusing." The infuriating smile on my partners face made me irritable.

"Fight?" I asked, eyes wide and curious.

"Yes." Yoda took a long sip of his tea, purposely drawing out his replies.

"By all means, take your time."

"Are you being sarcastic again?" he asked with suspicion.

"Just tell the story!" I hissed in annoyance.

"I came in to visit you as soon as I could and came across your brother sitting by your bed, his head bowed and clearly troubled," Yoda began, looking off into the distance as if trying to remember the exact details. "Your cousin was also in the room, sitting on the other side of the bed and obviously lost in thought.

"Neji didn't react as I took your medical notes but Hinata smiled at me. I stood by the window, looking over the paper, and we remained in a comfortable silence for an immeasurable amount of time. When Shikamaru walked into the room it was with urgency and panic – he was clearly worried about you." 

A grim smile stretched across my face at Yoda's words. It seemed that I tended to spend most of my time worrying Shikamaru.

"Following behind Shikamaru was the Yamanaka girl and your fat friend-"

"Choji," I corrected with a disapproving look but bid him continue.

"Your brother didn't react to their presence at first but I saw as Shikamaru's body language became angry, just like you'd taught me to recognize, and Neji, sensing something was amiss, looked up.

_"What are you doing here?" Shikamaru asked as he stood in the doorway with a tight jaw and narrowed eyes._

_"I think I'm allowed at my sisters sick bed," Neji replied defensively as he glanced towards Nanami and then back to Shikamaru._

_"I don't think so after the way you've treated her," Shikamaru hissed, taking a step into the room involuntarily with clenched fists._

_"Shikamaru, not here," Ino muttered, grabbing onto her teammates shoulder and trying to calm him down, but the Nara just shook away her hand._

_"After all been through for the village over the past half a year and without the support of her family behind her and you sit by her bed as if you are _concerned._" Yoda looked up at this comment and narrowed his eyes in warning, but Shikamaru didn't care. Choji and Ino were looking to their teammate with frowns, having been friends with the Nara long enough to know that when he revealed any type of information all those present should take note and listen._

_"W-w-what do y-you mean?" stuttered Hinata as she picked up on Shikamaru's choice of words._

_"Been through for the village? It was her own doing." The Hyuuga genius gave a heavy sigh, obviously tired of all the hassle._

_"Her own doing?" Shikamaru's voice remained even but there was obvious tension. "If following orders and completing an undercover mission was her fault then, sure, I guess you could say her problems were due to her 'own doing'."_

_"Undercover mission?" Neji asked, eyes growing slightly wider and jaw tensing. He broke eye contact with Shikamaru and looked to Nanami's sleeping form sharply, breaths quickening as he swallowed involuntarily. "How do you-"_

_"It's Nanami. If you even knew her at all you'd realize she doesn't do uncontrollable sadistic," hissed the Nara, ignoring everyone but Neji. "You should stop believing everything you're told."_

_"Shika, do you mean to say that Nana has been working as a spy for Konoha?" Choji said as he exchanged a wide-eyed look with the Yamanaka._

_"Oh Nana," Hinata whispered as she grabbed onto her beloved cousins hand tightly and with deep compassion. "We're so sorry for not believing in you."_

_"The annoying thing is," Shikamaru continued, "is that Nana is loyal to a fault. I bet as soon as she wakes up she'll forgive everyone without blinking an eye. Even you, after what you said in the preliminaries. You said you didn't care about her then; what's changed?" Nobody dared make a sound._

_Neji's eyes didn't move from his sister's face and had Nanami been awake she would have noticed the deep fear that had ingrained itself into her brother's face._

_"You know," Yoda said breaking the silence and taking a deep breath portraying frustration as if he were dealing with small children. "Had that information not just been declassified only _yesterday_ I could have apprehended you for divulging villages secrets." Yoda folded the notes he had been reading and observed those present critically._

_"Well then, lucky it's just been declassified," the Nara genius said between gritted teeth. _

_"When you say declassified…?" Neji whispered as he turned his attention to Yoda, obviously wanting to know exactly what had gone on._

_"Some things are still need to know but I can tell you that without Nanami's position of intelligence before and during the exams things might have gone a little differently in Konoha favor." Yoda stepped up to Nana's bedside and looked down at his partner with a frown. "She's done so well I'd be surprised if she doesn't get a field promotion for this."_

_"You still haven't answered me; what's changed?" pushed Shikamaru as he tried to recapture Neji's attention._

_"Shika-" Ino tried again but was cut off sharply._

_"No, I need to hear this," the boy said forcefully. Shikamaru was never forceful and it was a testament of intelligence of his teammates that they stood back and allowed him his space._

_"She's family," Neji mumbled, clenching his fists in his lap. "Even without knowing the truth, about her sacrifices and her strength and her selflessness. The fight with Naruto showed me how I should have stood by her and trusted her, even when others did not. That I should have been there for her like I know she would have been for me. And I know you're right that when she wakes up she'll forgive me… and I agree with you that she probably shouldn't." A moment of silence passed._

_"Happy?" spat the Hyuuga as he glared up at Nanami's best friend._

_"Not really," mumbled Shikamaru as he left the room as quickly as he had come._

"Very descriptive," I told Yoda.

"Thank you," he acknowledged as he fell into a comfortable silence. After speaking with Neji when I'd woken up I already knew his regrets and I'd already forgiven him for his short comings, but hearing the tale from Yoda made me feel more balanced in my decision. I resolved to talk to Shikamaru about his clear frustrations and troubles concerning my wellbeing.

"Has Naruto gone to get Tsunade?" I asked after a minute of silence.

Yoda sighed. "One of these day's I will understand how you know everything,"

"One of these day's maybe," I told my friend with a wink. I was from a clan that could see behind walls and part of a department whose job it was to know everything. As far as the world seemed to think, including Naruto and Yoda and even Shikamaru, there was a very obvious reason why I'd gotten into torture and interrogation straight out of the academy.

For now no one seemed to question my ability to know everything; I could have heard a higher official talk about it or Naruto could have popped by before he'd left, and I'd only been pretending to be unconscious, and told me all about everything. Okay, highly unlikely but who knew what people believed to help them to sleep at night. People are more likely to believe an improbable but rational story that a completely impossible one. If I ever did tell anyone about actually _how _I knew all these random facts I doubted anyone would believe me anyway.

Shikamaru stopped by later that day and as soon as I saw the kid I gave him a very unimpressed look.

"So you've heard then?" asked the boy as he ruffled his hair and gave a nervous laugh.

"All that time and it wasn't even me who got to do the big unveil," I pouted and gave a deep sigh. Shikamaru forced out a heavy laugh and then sat down at the side of my bed.

"Sorry about that, it's just when I saw your brother at your bedside like nothing had changed I just couldn't keep my opinions in check any longer." The Nara had obviously calmed down significantly and said this with carelessness.

"I know you meant well," I told my friend as I reached out and held his shoulder in a gesture of comfort. "Neji is a very troubled person and he's been through a lot-"

"Stop justifying his actions," snapped Shikamaru. _Okay, so maybe not completely calmed down._

"I'm not justifying them," I defended instantly and drew back my hand. "I just understand-"

"How he treated you was not right and you shouldn't forgive him so quickly," he counteracted.

"But he's said he's sorry."

"That doesn't mean he deserves it," Shikamaru said with a dry look.

"Stop being so angry for me. He's my brother and that's how it works. You fight, you hate each other and then you love each other again. It's a viscous cycle." I looked to Shikamaru with a fierce frown that said I wouldn't accept any other condition. I'd had siblings in my previous life and I knew the drill pretty well by now about how to handle angst driven brothers and sisters. We stared each other down for a few moments before Shikamaru relaxed visibly, obviously this was all too much effort for the kid, and shrugged his shoulders.

"You're just like Hinata at heart, you know," my best friend told me with a wry smile and a gentle look I'd never quite seen on his face before. "But seriously Nana, you spend your life scaring the hell out of me. Just try to have a little time off, yeah?"

We laughed together for a bit after that but, all jokes aside, I knew Shikamaru was deadly serious when he said that. He was probably questioning why he'd allowed us to become friends in the first place considering how troublesome I was.

!

**I'm very sorry for the delay. I put this in a little unexpected hiatus when I stopped feeling inspiration and life started to get in the way again. However, I have just begun to feel creativity once again and hopefully I can produce more chapters for you in the near future! I can't promise constant updates from now on but I'll see what I can do.**

** Also, I'm cutting down chapter sizes a little bit. They were getting to 10,000 words plus, which isn't necessarily bad but I want to make them about the length they were at the beginning of the story.**

**I hope this chapter has sedated some of you and made you like Neji again? I know, he's a bit of a dick, but we've come to know Nanami as quite a mature and forgiving spirit alongside all her other quirks. And what about Shikamaru? That was definitely my favorite bit to write. For those of you who are still reading thank you so very much! Your constant asking of whether I was going to update really did motivate me to start up the story again! **

**I will not abandon this story but I just took a little break. So, keep a whether eye on the Horizon my lovely readers!**


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